author's note: Well, I'm back from vacation. :) Wow, there were a lot of great reviews for last chapter. I'm glad you all liked the football game and Cameron's ending line. That was a fun chapter to write. Anyway, I hope this chapter will be worth the two week wait.

Chapter Ten:

Appearances Can Be Deceiving

John Connor had just felt the need to get out for a little bit. The movie of the night hadn't really appealed to him and truth-be-told he wasn't even sure he would have been able to concentrate on it. In fact, he was really just getting nervous. The closer they got to the end of camp, the higher the chance was of Kyle Reese's assassin showing up. And of course there was the lurking threat of Cromartie reappearing.

Then there were the other issues his mind was being bogged down by. Riley's return, her heartfelt request to be friends. The lovestruck attitudes of both Jason and Kyle towards Cameron. And, of course, probably the biggest issue of all: the rift between he and his mother. He desperately wanted to regain her trust, but he didn't see any way he could accomplish that without getting rid of Cameron. And that was something he wasn't prepared to do.

Ever.

He dipped a hand into the cool lake water, watching the moonlight reflect off it. Ah, Cameron, he thought bitterly. He hadn't experienced that horrible nightmare last night, but it was still fresh in his mind. He wondered if he would even be able to sleep at all tonight.

Something rustled in the reeds directly behind and he spun around, sighing with relief when he realized it was just Cameron. He turned back to the lake, quietly staring out at the water as she sat down beside him.

"John," she began. "You left the group. I was worried."

He smiled at that, just a little, then shrugged. "I just…had to be alone for a little bit."

"Oh," Cameron was silent for a moment, then moved to rise. "I can leave."

"No!" he insisted, grabbing her hand and pulling her back down onto the dock. "Don't. I…I'd rather be with you than by myself."

She complied, sitting beside him once more and studying his face. "You're worried. About the Triple 8 that's coming for Kyle. About Cromartie."

John cast his eyes downward. "Yeah, I guess."

"Don't be afraid," Cameron reassured him. "He won't hurt you. I won't let him."

"It's not me I'm worried about," John replied, looking up with anxious eyes. What if his dream was a vision of the future? What if Cromartie really was smart enough to take out her chip? To download the information from it? To kill both him and Cameron?

"Your dream won't come true," Cameron stated. "Don't worry about it."

She smiled effortlessly and John felt his spirit lift. Just a little. Because he knew deep down that was something she couldn't promise him. She had no control over what Cromartie did or learned.

Deep down, he still felt the pang of fear.

**********

Sarah Connor hates to sleep.

Sleep brings dreams…and nightmares. Sometimes her dreams are bizarre and seem to make no sense, like the ones about the turtle or the three dots. Sometimes they stem from her worst fears, the dream about John and Cameron, the pancakes, John coldly reminding Sarah 'you're not her'.

But sometimes they are far worse, far more frightening, and she wakes up in a cold sweat, sometimes screaming, sometimes being too scared to cry out. The first time she'd had the dream, it was back when she was with Charlie. She'd rushed into the library where John sat studying and all but dragged him out, knowing a Terminator would be coming for them.

She'd been right. They'd been arrested, placed in separate police cars. And then it came. The Terminator had shown up, taking down all of the cops as Sarah broke free and went to rescue John.

"You run!" she'd screamed. "Run!"

But running wasn't enough.

The Terminator had shrugged off Sarah's bullets, raising its pistol and targeting John. The shot had rung out. She'd seen her son collapse to the ground. She'd screamed, her world crashing down, as she ran to John's limp body, begging the Triple 8 to kill her.

"The future's ours," it had said. "And it begins now." Then the sky had exploded into fire and brimstone. Judgment Day. The bombs had fallen. The flames burned the flesh from the Terminator, leaving only the metal endoskeleton beneath. The monster stalked up and grabbed her by the neck, squeezing tightly as she gasped for breath. And as she stared into those terrible red eyes, she had jerked awake, her heart racing, hands shaking.

But this dream…this dream was different…but no less terrifying. In fact, if she had to judge between the two, she would have said this one was worse. In this dream, she sees John Connor, her son, looking not much older than he did now, standing among the burning wreckage after J-Day, his face streaked red from so many tears, slow sobs racking his body. Sarah's heart breaks for him, knows the intensity of the pain he must be feeling – that he had failed them all, failed to stop it, failed to save them. And she wants to remind him that he's not alone, that it wasn't his fault. They'd all failed, not just him. All of them - her, Derek, Cameron, everyone. What happened on Judgment Day was nobody's fault. She opens her arms wide, beckoning him in. John looks up in her direction and starts running toward her.

But he doesn't stop.

He doesn't even look at her as he passes. Sarah turns around, following him with her eyes to see Cameron waiting a few feet behind her, waiting with outstretched arms as well, almost mocking Sarah's behavior. John collapses against her, burying his face in her arms and sobbing uncontrollably. Cameron looks up, still cradling John's body against hers, and gives Sarah a smug smile. Sarah sees a flash of light, a small sparkle coming from Cameron's hand.

And Sarah knows, somehow, she just knows. It was a ring, made from the diamond John had given Cameron long ago. The implication of that ring twisted Sarah's stomach and she wanted to scream and charge Cameron, to rip the cyborg apart with her bare hands. But she finds that her legs would not move, no sound came out of her mouth.

It seems like an eternity, being forced to watch the machine gently stroke John's back, comforting him, all the while with that sadistic smile sent in Sarah's direction.

And Sarah still can't move.

Finally John untangles himself from Cameron's arms, rising to his feet, tears wiped away, his face strong and determined once more. He has become John Connor again. He has become the leader, the hero of mankind. He strides confidently over to a small group of ragtag resistance fighters. Sarah can see both Derek and Kyle Reese among them. Their eyes are fearful, proud, and willing at the same time. They were ready to fight, ready to die for John Connor, to take back the future under the leadership of their savior.

But as John walks toward the fighters, Sarah sees Cameron reach behind her back and pull out a nine-millimeter she had tucked beneath her shirt. Before Sarah can cry out, bullets rip into John's back and he sinks to the ground. She screams silently and rushes to her son's side, calling his name desperately, even though she knows it is too late.

John Connor is dead.

Murdered.

By the very Terminator devoted to protecting him, the one who had professed to love him.

She whirls on Cameron, her face tortured and angry. "Why?" she demands hoarsely. "You were supposed to love him."

There is nothing in Cameron's eyes, nothing visible on her face. No emotion, no guilt, no grief. "I am a machine," she states in a cold monotone. "I can't love."

Sarah stares down at John's serene face, feeling the hot tears streaming down her cheeks. Why, John? How could you trust her like this?

"Thank you, Sarah," Cameron says.

Sarah glares up at her angrily. "For what?" she demands bitterly.

"For letting me get close to John," Cameron replies. This time the machine smiles wickedly. Sarah shakes her head, tears flowing freely. She had done this. She had caused John's death. By letting Cameron live, she let the cyborg get close enough to manipulate him, to corrupt him, to deceive him.

And then… to kill him.

"The future's ours now," Cameron says.

Sarah sees the sky explode again, great plumes of smoke and fire filling the air, Terminators pouring out of the wreckage from Judgment Day. Sarah hears the strangled cries of the soldiers, sees their horrified expressions at the metal army advancing. She sees Derek and Kyle, fighting bravely against the waves of the enemy, though she knew they must realize it's a lost cause. They were all dead.

As if killing John wasn't enough, it is Cameron who raises her nine-millimeter, takes careful aim, and shoots Kyle Reese in the head. Sarah watches with horror as his head whip backwards, a trail of blood following him to the ground. She hears the unbearable, anguished cry of Derek Reese, a sound that would haunt her forever.

Sarah desperately cradles John's body closer to her own, trying to block out the sounds of the dying. Cameron slowly stalks forward. Her flesh doesn't burn off in the heat. The human skin remains…so that Sarah can look into her cold, human-like face. Cameron grabs her by the throat, metal fingers tightening. Sarah sees a flash of red beneath Cameron's eyes…then nothing at all.

She bolted up in her bunk, sweating, pulse pounding. As her eyes refocused in the dark, she realized that she was holding her Glock out, ready to shoot. She quickly glanced around and stuffed it back under her pillow, taking deep breaths to calm herself down. She decided that she must not have screamed in her sleep, otherwise the other counselors would have surely woken up.

*********

Sarah was pouring the next batch of pancakes on the griddle for breakfast when Cameron came in, up earlier than any of the other campers. Sarah resisted the incredible urge to draw her Glock.

"I had planned on waiting for you with Derek's sniper rifle," she admitted in a cold voice. She turned around and saw the confusion on Cameron's face. Of course, the machine couldn't know about Sarah's nightmare. But that didn't make the implications any less real.

"Pulled the trigger," Sarah continued. "Solved about fifty percent of my problems with one shot."

Cameron looked guarded now, leery, probably expecting Sarah to attack her at any moment.

Sarah shook her head. "You know how bad I would have felt?"

"Very bad." Cameron ventured.

Sarah almost laughed. Yeah right. It would have felt good. "Not bad at all," she retorted. Some of the anger faded. "But I know someone who would have felt bad. Someone who would have never forgiven me if I'd have done that."

She didn't have to say John's name. Both of them knew exactly who she was talking about.

"I don't know what I'm going to do with you," Sarah whispered, more to herself than to Cameron. She still believed the dream. It was true, Cameron was going to kill John by getting close to him. Thinking about it only caused her blood to boil and her rage to grow even more.

"You're concerned for his safety," Cameron spoke up.

"You bet I am," Sarah hissed.

"From Skynet." Cameron hesitated. "From me."

"Yes," Sarah replied. "Especially you."

"We're all a threat to John," Cameron stated. "He worries about us and that makes him vulnerable. He cares."

Don't turn this around on me. "I am not John's problem," she insisted. "You are. He's vulnerable because he cares about you, more than he should." Sarah shook her head slowly. "Why are you still here? You're a danger to him, more so than the rest of us."

The cyborg's eyes dropped to the floor. It was obviously something Cameron worried about anyway. Sarah seized the opportunity.

"You know his secrets, you know who his father is; you know things that you shouldn't. You know things that can help Skynet destroy him. If they could get your chip and read it, if they could kill Kyle and John, it would be your fault."

She saw something flash across Cameron's face, something akin to pain. Sarah shook her head bitterly. It's not real. She's faking it, just like she fakes it with John. "You could have just stayed away. You say you care about John. Then leave him alone."

"I can't do that. John shouldn't be alone."

"He won't be," Sarah snarled. "He has his family, his real family, the ones who care about him."

"You're not the only one who cares about John."

"John doesn't love you," Sarah snapped bitterly. "He can't love you. John sent you here from the future. He sent you away, away from him."

Cameron looked away, but Sarah didn't stop. "Maybe you should think about that. Maybe you should think about why he didn't want you around anymore."

The hurt in Cameron's eyes seemed genuine, though Sarah knew it was a lie. Everything Cameron said was a lie. She couldn't truly feel. But as the cyborg turned and walked out, Sarah felt a twinge of regret. This wasn't like her. She wasn't usually so cruel. Was she seriously basing all of her hatred on that horrifying nightmare? Not all nightmares have to come true.

But they're based in reality, right? There was a good possibility...

On your feet, soldier.

Sarah's head snapped up. It was Kyle's voice; she'd recognize it anywhere. What was he telling her? Focus on the mission at hand? Don't rely on dreams to guide your actions?

This isn't you, Sarah. You're not like them.

Sarah shook her head. I can't trust her. I can't let her get to my son. She hoped desperately that Kyle's voice would answer, would somehow reassure her, tell her what to do. Was relying on voices in her head just as crazy as relying on dreams?

You need her.

She closed her eyes. He was right. He was always right. Much as she hated the cyborg, they needed Cameron right now. The Triple 8 was coming for young Kyle Reese. What if Cameron took Sarah's words to heart – or her equivalent of a heart – and left? What if John died because of it? Because Cameron wasn't there to protect him? Sarah felt the accusation like a punch in the gut. She was just as bad as Cameron.

What if she had just caused John's death?

author's note: This chapter was a bit Sarah-centric, but the next will have more Jameron in it, I promise. :)