Sorry it's a little late. :( This is primarily a Cameron development chapter. Hope you all like it.

Chapter Fourteen:

From Blood-Stained Hands

Sarah entered the small shed on the outskirts of the main campground where she and Derek had stored most of their weapons in anticipation of the Triple 8 attack. Derek was inside already, cleaning out his sniper rifle and double-checking all the other weapons. He must have been thinking the same thing she was.

The week was almost over. Which meant that if the Terminator was coming for Kyle Reese, it would be coming soon. But it wasn't the other Kyle that was at the forefront of her mind.

It was her Kyle.

What was on her mind was the image of her son and the machine lip-locked outside the mechanics lab in the moonlight. What was on her mind was the vision of Kyle, the stories he'd told her, the words he'd spoken. What was on her mind was Cameron.

"What?" Derek asked, obviously seeing the conflict on her face. "What's wrong?"

Sarah shook her head. She wasn't sure she wanted to tell Derek anything. If she had been ready to shoot Cameron upon seeing the kiss, then Derek would be ready to cut her head open, burn her in thermite, and crush her chip with his bare hands.

"What?" Derek demanded.

"I saw John…with…her."

Derek's jaw tightened. There was no need to explain who her was. "With?" he repeated. "As in…with?"

She nodded reluctantly. "As in kiss of death, as you called it."

Derek's eyes clouded as a dark shadow crossed his face, rage completely controlling him. "I'll burn it myself."

Sarah grabbed his arm as he turned to leave. Burning Cameron would be the absolute worst thing they could do. "Derek, stop," she commanded. "You do that, you burn John too. It would destroy him."

Derek scowled. "Or maybe it would save him."

Sarah stepped back. "I don't know anymore. What if John's right? What if she's different?"

"She's not different," Derek insisted vehemently. "She's manipulating him. I've told you from the start, she can't be trusted."

John trusts her…Kyle trusts her… "For the longest time, when I looked at her, all I could see was the metal endoskeleton underneath, the Terminator. Lately, I've been seeing her as John sees her; the girl instead of the machine."

That revelation caused almost as much shock on Derek's face as the news about the so-called death kiss. "You can't seriously be…"

"He needs me to believe in him, Derek," Sarah said desperately. "Maybe we were wrong." Maybe Kyle is right. "Maybe nothing is as it seems, even Cameron."

"Yeah, not as she seems," Derek agreed wholeheartedly. "Not human."

"Not human, yes," Sarah relented. "But maybe she's not as emotionless as we all believed. Maybe John's right. Maybe I need to start trusting him."

Believe in me, Mom. I'll always need you.

***********

John wandered around in the kitchen's backroom, glancing at the labels on some of the cardboard boxes. All the counselors were currently in a meeting and Cameron was supposed to be helping his mother get breakfast ready, which left him alone and bored.

Maybe there's some crunchy Cheetos in one of these boxes…

The door opened behind him and he turned to see Riley walk in, her eyes apologetic. "John, I want to apologize for what happened at the campfire last night. I shouldn't have mentioned Mexico. You're right. It was a mistake."

John shook his head, eyebrows narrowed. He was done playing games with Riley. "What are you trying to do? One minute you seem like you want to be my friend, and the next you're attacking Cameron. What aren't you telling me? What are you hiding?"

Riley looked away, biting her lip. "I'm sorry, John. I just…I know Cameron hates me. I guess I just figured if I could get her away from you…we could be friends again."

"Just friends?" John questioned. That couldn't be all she wanted.

"Yes," Riley agreed softly. "If that's what you want."

John still didn't understand. There was no way he could be friends with both Cameron and Riley. They didn't mesh well; both hated the other with a passion. He still hated seeing Riley in pain. He hated the fact that she was still an outcast at the camp, much as he and Cameron were.

Empathy, Cameron would say.

"I don't know, Riley," he said with a sigh. "I've already told you this won't work."

Riley took a step closer, forcing a smile. "John, please…"

John sighed. "Well, we are still on the same team, so I guess we do have to be at least civil towards each other…"

He heard the door open behind him, but Riley didn't seem to notice or care.

"Thank you, John, thank you!" she exclaimed, leaning up to kiss John on the cheek. John recoiled instantly and suddenly a hand grabbed onto Riley's shoulder, throwing her into a stack of boxes.

"Riley!" John cried, looking on in horror as Cameron stalked forward. "Cameron, what are you doing?"

Cameron replied in a low monotone. "I'm protecting you." John saw her left hand clench, the hand he'd worked on, the hand she'd insisted was broken, uncontrollable. She stalked over to where Riley had fallen and grabbed the other girl by the wrist.

"You're a threat to John," she said.

John took a small step forward, keeping his hands raised cautiously. "Cameron, let her go!"

"She's lying to you."

"I know, I know, but its okay," he replied. He caught a glimpse of Riley's frightened face. "We can work this out."

"Please, please let me go," Riley whispered, eyes brimming with tears.

"You can't be near John," Cameron replied. John thought he heard a bit of anger in her tone. "You can't stay here anymore, but I can't let you leave."

"Cameron!" John demanded. "Don't do this." This wasn't supposed to be happening…was she glitching again? Did her jealous streak run that deep? Was it a combination of everything Riley had done this week, the fact that Cameron knew Riley was hiding something, something potentially harmful to John…

"I have to protect you," Cameron replied. "She's a danger to you."

"Listen to me," John pleaded. "This isn't you. You're not like the others. You're not the enemy, remember? You're different. You won't do it."

Cameron's cold stare caught him off-guard. "Won't I?"

John drew in a shaky breath. "You're not like them," he repeated. "You have to do what's right. I've taught you to be good, show me you understand."

He saw her glance at Riley, hesitating. "She's a threat to you, John. She's trying to manipulate you."

So Cameron had noticed the same thing. "I don't love her!" he insisted vehemently. "Listen to me, Cameron! Please for me…don't let me have another death on my hands."

She looked up at him, and he knew there was only one way he could convince her of the truth. And that was to use words she understood, words she'd used and insisted were true. If she'd been telling the truth when she spoke them, she'd understand that he was too. If not…then it really didn't matter anymore anyway.

"Please, I love you! I love you, Cameron, and you love me!"

She reacted to it, recognized the words and John could feel his whole body trembling in anticipation of her reaction. Finally, he saw her grip relax and Riley yanked her wrist free, dropping to the ground and nearly crying with relief.

John closed his eyes, letting out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. She'd been so close…so close to ruining everything they'd been working towards, so close to crossing the line.

She may have gone about it the wrong way, but he knew that Cameron had been right about one thing.

Riley was not what she seemed.

***********

Riley could feel the unshed tears welling in her eyes as she sat on the cold floor, stunned and sobbing. She'd never been so scared in her life. So close to dying…being killed at the hands of John's cyborg, all for the sake of trying to save John's humanity. She had no idea how John was going to explain Cameron's mental breakdown. How would he make an excuse for the machine this time?

She knew where his priorities were. He'd checked on Cameron first, maybe to make sure she was still stable before he came to Riley's aid, looking worried and relieved at the same time. "Riley, I'm so sorry."

He was careful not to touch her, lest Cameron go off on her again. She rose shakily to her feet, letting her heart rate slowly return to normal before she answered him. "It's fine. I'm okay, John, really…"

John's face twisted. "Riley, I don't know what to say. She's just…she's…"

"Had a breakdown," Riley supplied. "Has to do with the metal plate in her head, right? The brain experiments?"

John seemed caught off guard, obviously not expecting his latest excuse to come from her. "Uh…yeah…"

Riley forced a smile. Why make it harder on him? She owed him that much after he just saved her life. "It can happen to anyone. A lot of the foster kids I was with had some mental problems too. They were less violent, but…I'm used to it."

John nodded slowly, a look of puzzlement on his face before he glanced up at Cameron.

It was then that Riley saw that the door to the counselor's meeting room was open slightly, and a familiar face was watching. Jesse turned away from the door, looking disappointed. Riley couldn't understand it. Had Jesse just seen what Cameron had nearly done to her? Hadn't Jesse promised that she wouldn't let Cameron hurt her?

Something else was going on here…something bigger than she knew. And Riley was determined to find out.

*************

Riley's behavior was still burned into his mind. He saw the absolute fear in her eyes as Cameron had stepped closer, a fear that was almost irrational…if Cameron was an ordinary girl. No, Riley had acted scared out of her mind.

She'd acted like Cameron was a Terminator.

But she couldn't know about the future. He hadn't told her anything. Was it just the knowledge that Cameron was dangerous, that somehow having a metal plate and brain issues made her more fearful than usual?

And what of her behavior afterward? The way she'd covered for him, the way she'd come up with a cover story before he could think of one. She could have called him out, had Cameron thrown out of camp, but she'd covered it up. He couldn't understand why she would do that. But Cameron was right. Riley was lying about something. She was hiding something.

He just didn't know what that something was.

John paused in the kitchen doorway, watching puzzled as Cameron stood over the sink, washing her hands. She'd been in here ever since they'd left the backroom. "What are you doing?"

Cameron didn't even look up. "Washing my hands."

John raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"There's too much blood on them."

John couldn't imagine how she could have gotten blood on her hands. She hadn't drawn any blood during the ordeal with Riley. Even so, it shouldn't have taken that long to scrub off. He walked up behind her, saying pointedly, "You've been doing that for ten minutes."

Cameron looked down at her hands and turned off the water. "There's a lot of blood."

John caught a glimpse of her hands, but didn't see anything on them. "You haven't killed anyone today. What's going on?"

"I read about it."

"About what? Washing hands?"

"Yes. It was in our English class," she stated. "Macbeth. Lady Macbeth helps her husband commit many murders in order to become ruler of the kingdom. Later on, she feels guilty and tries to wash her hands over and over again, trying to get rid of the blood that isn't there. She's trying to wash away the guilt."

John felt a small lump form in his throat and he almost wasn't able to speak. "And you feel guilty for killing so many people."

Cameron still wouldn't meet his eyes. "I have a list too. Enrique, the three men at the bowling alley, Dimitri and his sister Maria, Jordan…"

"You didn't kill Jordan," John reminded her quietly. "Or Dimitri and Maria."

"But I didn't help them either," Cameron replied. "And I stopped you from helping Jordan. I still caused their deaths."

John gave her a sad smile. The fact that she had learned to recognize that was a big step, a huge leap into morality. He stepped forward and placed a hand gently on her shoulder.

"Then that means you're ahead of schedule too," he pointed out softly.

Cameron finally looked up. "With what?"

"What you need to learn."

**********

Cameron had said there was one other thing she needed to show him. John didn't know what it could be, simply followed her back to her cabin where she opened her travel pack and pulled out a stack of notes.

"Back at school, people wrote notes for Jordan to express their sadness," she replied. "Because crying wasn't enough. Notes can be used to express emotions. All emotions, not just sadness."

John stared at the thick pile of little papers, momentarily stunned. "Cameron…what is this?"

"Notes," she replied. "For everyone I killed."

John swallowed hard and picked up one that read: JORDAN. He unfolded it slowly, unsure of what to expect. It was short, in Cameron's distinct, perfect handwriting: I'm sorry I stopped John from helping you.

Aware of Cameron watching him silently, he sifted through another that read CHIMNEY BIRD: I'm sorry I accidentally crushed you. It was unintentional. I was trying to set you free. Another one was titled MARIA. It read: You taught me that dance is the hidden language to the soul. I'm sorry I did not help save you.

John set it down, catching sight of another buried deeper in the pile. He pushed a few more out of the way until he could see the name clearly.

It was his. JOHN.

He exhaled loudly before opening it up.

John, I'm sorry I tried to kill you. You have to understand that it wasn't me. My chip was damaged and I had no control of myself. I would never do anything to hurt you, though I understand if you do not trust me anymore. You trusted me and I betrayed that trust. I am not completely fixed. There is still damage to my chip. I would ask that you self-terminate me so that I can no longer be a threat to you, but…I don't want to go. I don't want to go away from you. I am sorry for what happened on your birthday. I want you to know that I wasn't lying when I said I loved you. I do love you, John.

At seeing those words, John Connor completely broke down, the tears flowing freely down his face. Oh, Cameron, I'm so sorry…He hadn't known. After the explosion, he'd been such a jerk to her, never realizing that her own feelings - yes feelings - were coming to surface. That she was becoming aware of what they meant. He felt awful. He didn't deserve her undying love and devotion.

Cameron seemed troubled at his tears, kneeling beside him and attempting to comfort him. "I don't understand. Did I do something wrong?"

John smiled at her through the tears. "No, Cameron. You…you did something right."

She hadn't been lying when she said she loved him that day, just as he hadn't been lying when he'd said it to her, to keep her from killing Riley, from adding another name to the list he didn't know she had.

For a moment, he had seen into her. She'd opened up to him. She'd showed him things that made her seem like so much more than a machine. No other cyborg he knew had felt guilt the way she had.

It was real, it was different.

It was human.

All he could do was smile.