Tug O War Princess
Sesshy's Mistress
Summary: What if L was not the only one to be chained to Light? What if he was chained to another, much more pleasant person than simply just L?
Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon or Death Note. I do not own the characters pertaining to either anime. I am simply using them for my own amusement.
Usagi sat between L and Light with her pearl pink iPod's ear pieces fitted snugly into her ears. She hummed along with the song with her eyes closed, trying to drown out the sound of Light and L's arguing. Her iPod sat snug in her breast pocket of her shirt so her hands were free to flail about in rhythm to the exaggerated arm movements of the two detectives she was chained to.
Usagi let one eye open to gaze at the havoc going on around her. Light and L were once again in each other's faces. By the way their mouths opened so wide, Usagi figured it was safe to say that there was a bunch of yelling going on. Definitely. She merely sighed and turned up the volume on her iPod.
Suddenly, a song that Usagi definitely did not remember putting on her iPod popped up and started playing - My Dick by Mickey Avalon. Usagi "eeped" in shock and her face turned blood red. Pulling out her iPod and looking at the album picture, instead, she found a picture of Minako holding a sign that said: "Priceless". No wonder the song sounded so familiar. Minako had played that non stop when she first heard it and laughed her butt off the entire time. Usagi would never forget the look on Motoki's face when she let him hear it. He had promptly scolded the slightly taller blonde and covered Usagi's ears as he, as Usagi would later find out, cursed up a storm. Motoki cursing, wow, what was the world coming to?
"Minako…" Usagi's left eye began to twitch and she had to watch herself so as to not crush her iPod in her hands. She was just about to hit for the next song when her eyes lifted up and noticed that Light's mouth as well as L's were moving in sync with the song lyrics. Now and then they wouldn't but, for the most part, it appeared as if the song was coming from their mouth!
Usagi busted out laughing so hard that she fell out of her chair and into a heap on the floor. Oh my goodness! Usagi couldn't hold back the laughter that rippled through her body. Tears began to leak from her eyes and they only doubled when she noticed that the two detectives, along with the rest of the taskforce, were looking at her with concerned looks. Usagi tried to stop laughing but it was too hard. Really, everything was beginning to make sense. Light and L were always at each others throat and not just over Kira being Light. Light's masculinity and ego was being attacked by L and vice versa when Light would deny and prove L wrong. Slowly, over time, this had turned from simply trying to find Kira to proving to the other that they were wrong and the other person was better!
Usagi ignored the looks she was receiving and simply waved them off. Oh boy! She hadn't laughed that hard in a very, very long time. Reaching behind her to the desk, she pulled off her 'doodle' book. It was a book of doodles and notes she had started right after being shackled up to the two. Whenever she found herself annoyed, she would simply doodle or write in the book to calm her nerves. Flipping to a blank page, Usagi used a pen to write "Task force iPod Theme songs" over the top of the page. On the first line, she wrote "My Dick-Light VS L". Maybe she wouldn't have to kill Minako after all….
Usagi laid her iPod on the table and started to hit the next button, searching through her playlist for a song that would fit solely for either L or Light. It took quite a bit of hunting; however, Usagi was happy to find a song that was perfect for L.
"I am the candy man…coming from bounty land…
I am the candy man…coming from bounty land…
I wish that you were my lollipop
Sweet things I will never get enough
If you show me to the sugar tree
Will you give me a soda pop for free?
Come with me honey, I am your sweet sugar candy man…
Run like the wind; fly with me to bounty land…
Bite me I'm yours, if your hungry please understand…
This is the end of the sweet sugar candy man…
Oh my love, I know you are my candy man
And Oh my love, your word is my command
Oh my love, I know you are my candy man
And Oh my love let us drive to bounty land…
…"
Usagi giggled and wrote the name of the song with L's name beside of it on the second line:
Lollipop (Candy Man)-Aqua
Everything around Usagi began to fade out of existence as she continued her hunt for theme songs. Her small finger continued to push the "next" button in search for another song that would 'scream' the name of another taskforce member. Light was going to be the last of her choices to pick from, he was just too complex to limit to just one song. Well, L was in the same boat but, still, she'd leave Light for last.
Usagi came to another song, "Ice Cream and Cake". It wasn't exactly the beat that she would picture for L but the lyrics were priceless. She added it below L's other theme song, Lollipop. Oh the hilarity! If only catching Kira was this fun! Hm, what would Kira's song be? Another tough subject to find for. Oh well, when it comes it'll come.
Usagi pushed the button for the next song once again. This time the song "Gives You Hell" by the All American Rejects popped up. Her eyes widened and a large grin with a strange similarity to L's popped up. She quickly jotted down the name of the song and scribbled Light's next to it while listening to the lyrics:
"I wake up every evenin'
With a big smile on my face
And it never feels out of place
And you're still probably workin' at a 9-5 pace
I wonder how bad that tastes…
When you see my face I hope it gives you hell…
Gives you hell
When you walk my way, I hope it gives you hell…
Gives you hell
Now where's your picked fence love?
And where's that shinny car?
And did it ever get you far?
You never seemed so tense love…
Never seen you fall so hard…
Do you know where you are?
And truth be told I miss you…
And truth be told I'm lyin…
When you see my face I hope it gives you hell…
Gives you hell
When you walk my way, I hope it gives you hell…
Gives you hell…
…"
Usagi thought that the song rang true, especially the lyrics. Whenever Light made it a point to push a subject, L would get really mad and all bent out of shape. True, it wasn't as bad now, but it still rang true.
"I hope that it will give you hell….." Usagi sang lightly under her breath as the song finished. She closed her eyes and could almost picture Light screaming that to L the next time L pulled a stunt that overly pissed Light off. More giggles escaped her but it stopped when she found another song to fit a (somewhat) task force member, Misa Amane.
Superstar – Toybox
The song rang loud and clear through Usagi's ears and she couldn't hold back the nervous chuckle and sweat drop. Truly, that song did represent Misa quite well. It seemed the only person, besides herself and Light, which she cared about was Kira. Usagi found it quite strange how she obsessed over the two men. No wonder L still thought Light to be Kira…
"I am a super star with a big, big house and a big, big car…
I am a superstar and I don't care who you are!
I am a super star with a big, big house and a big, big car…
I am a superstar and I don't care who you are!
Get any money, honey? I'm a super star!
My life is funny, honey, have you seen my car?
I know a lot of people… I'm a super star!
Everybody knows me, Right from near!
I've got a plane…I've got a plane…
I love the fame…I love the fame…
You know my name…You know my name…
And I just want you to know…
I am a super star with a big, big house and a big, big car…
I am a superstar and I don't care who you are!
I am a super star with a big, big house and a big, big car…
I am a superstar and I don't care who you are!
…"
Usagi slapped her head down into her hands to hide the wide smile and try to muffle the snickers escaping her. It was bad enough as it was with the task force giving her the eye already. The last of her needs was to have Misa kill her for busting out laughing at the lyrics to the song that described her so well, "I've got fortune. I've got fame., love it when you say my name! Love to party. I am naughty. Prettier then everybody!"
Usagi sat herself back up straight and leaned backwards into her chair. Her head tilted back to stare up at the ceiling and she tried to find a song to fit any of the other task members. It was quite hard considering that she never had time to bond with them like she had L and Light. Of course, if bonding meant being chained to them for God knows how long, well, she could pass on that offer.
Not surprisingly, another good theme song for L popped up, "I want Candy" by … Well, Usagi wasn't entirely sure. Looking towards her iPod once again, she was reminded that Aaron Carter had made the song. Man, what an old song! Usagi paused her iPod for a moment and reached into her purse for a Hershey Kiss. Hiding it in her hand, she called out to L. Him and Light were still in an argument and refused to look away from one another but he did seem to listen to her.
"Yes, Usagi?" L questioned here while still glaring daggers at the ever adamant Light Yagami. Light returned the glare full fold and tried not to finish his biting retort until Usagi said what she had to say.
"Do you want candy?" Usagi asked innocently while holding out her hand palm up where a daintily wrapped Hershey Kiss sat in the middle of it. L blinked his eyes towards her before zeroing in on the sweet treat sitting in her palm. He reached over and plucked it from her hand, holding it by the thin paper sticking up from the wrapping. Using his other hand, he un-wrapped it and then popped the chocolate into his mouth, finishing it off quickly and then going back to arguing with Light.
Usagi giggled and scribbled down L's name next to "I want Candy" as well.
A deeper and darker song started to flood Usagi's mind when "Your Going Down" by Sick Puppies started up. For some reason, the darkness of the song had always called to her, reminding her of how consumed she felt when fighting Chaos; however, the same did not apply now for this particular song. The beat reminded her of a fast pace war beat that would be played while soldiers marched into battle. Her eyes once again locked with the two disputing detectives, a perfect representation. But which did it fit best to?
"Define your meaning of war,
To me it's what we do when we're bored,
I feel the heat coming off of the black top,
And it makes me want it more…
Because I'm hyped up and outta control,
If it's a fight then I'm ready to go,
I wouldn't put my money on the other guy,
If you know what I already know…
It's been a long time coming…
And the tables' turned around…
Cause one of us is goin'…
One of us is goin' down…
I'm not runnin'…
It's a little different now…
Cause one of us is goin'…
ONE OF US IS GOIN' DOWN!!!!
…"
Usagi let her mind wonder to when she first started to join the task force. At the time, Light Yagami had set her on edge. Her senses and minor defenses had shot up in warning. Something about him just seemed off compared to the others. Unlike Misa, who had a tainted aura, he failed to hide his as well as she did. His eyes, unlike hers, did not shine with joy, they were narrowed in mistrust, deception, and hate. Those eyes reminded her so much of those of her loved ones when they were corrupted and controlled by Chaos. When she had voiced her concerns to Mamoru, he had told her to be careful but he still seemed confused. Was she the only one to notice how his eyes did not reflect anything but emptiness at times? Apparently not, she would later learn while watching how Light and L interacted with one another.
Usagi jotted down Light's name next to the song title. Yes, it definitely fit him more so than L. Of course, L had his own times but…he never ever looked nearly as threatening as Light did then. Now, however, Light had a shine to his eyes. Maybe that was why she was finally able to open and be his friend. He no longer reminded her of the heartache she had suffered at having to fight her friends at the last battle.
Usagi grew tired of such a dark and depressing song and searched for something else. It didn't take her long to find what she wanted:
"Ready, ready set go…
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah,
Come on, come on, come on, come on,
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah,
Come on, come on, come on, come on…
If I were a dentist I would take the opportunity to look in your mouth…
Maybe if I did then I would better understand just what you're talking about…
And if my X-ray vision gave the proper information I'd be back at the start…
'Cause every time I try to talk to you my words keep falling apart…
Pretty girls make me nervous…
Pretty girls make me nervous…
Pretty girls make me nervous…
When they're as pretty as you!
If I were a surgeon I'd do an operation to examine your heart,
I'd check to see if you and me could really ever move beyond the very start,
And if my diagnosis turned out positive I'd still be only dreaming of you,
'Cause approaching you is something that I know I'd never have the guts to do…
Pretty girls make me nervous…
Pretty girls make me nervous…
Pretty girls make me nervous…
When they're as pretty as you!
…"
Usagi remembered how amazed and awe inspired Matsuda had been when she first transformed. She could practically see the hearts in his eyes when he realized that she was his favorite super heroine, Sailor Moon! When he found out he didn't have a chance because of Mamoru, he had moved to his second favorite idol, Misa Amana aka Misa-Misa.
Now Usagi was left with Chief Yagami, Aizawa, Ide, Ukita, and Mogi. Other than Chief Yagami, she didn't really speak with the others that much other than Aizawa's few and sparse remarks on her thoughts of Kira situations. Unfortunately, he had walked out on the task force once the police refused to have anything to do with hunting down Kira. Usagi felt sorry for the man and hoped beyond hope that he and his family would be okay.
Usagi shook off her thoughts and hunted through more of her iPod's songs to hunt for something for the other and, in her opinion, last key task force member, Chief Yagami. He was like a second father to her and he always made sure to be there if she needed someone to talk to other than his son and L.
Usagi ended up going through almost every song on her iPod. She disregarded any other songs that might fit L, Light, Misa, and/or Matsuda. Her main focus was Chief Yagami and she was going to find the song for him! Finally, she came to the very last song on her playlist, "Damned if I Do, Damned if I don't!" – All Time Low.
"I fought it for a long time now,
While drowning in a river of denial…
I washed up, fixed up, picked up,
All the broken things…
'Cause you left me police scene, chalk line,
Tequila shots in the dark scene of the crime…
Suburban living with a feeling that I'm giving up
Everything for you!!!!!!
…"
Usagi remembered how broken hearted the man seemed when he realized just how truly L seemed to think of his son as the killer Kira. Her heart went out to him fully. Hopefully, Kira would be caught and everyone could rest without worry. Maybe L would be wrong, but Usagi doubted it. By looking at his past cases, L was never wrong…
"What are you doing, Usagi?" Matsuda walked over and began to read what all Usagi had been scribbling. When he noticed the title of the page, his eyes widened and a broad grin spread over his face, "Cool!"
"Matsuda?" Usagi blinked at his sudden appearance and tried to hide her notebook from him. Before she got the chance to stuff it under her butt and sit on it until everyone forgot it, a pale hand came into view and snatched it up. Usagi turned to find L holding the corner of her notebook between his index finger and thumb. His head was tilted to the side, staring and obviously reading what all was written. Usagi blushed and pushed her iPod into her pants pocket, safely hidden away.
"….My…Dick…?" L seemed to test the phrase on his tongue before turning his dark eyes on Usagi who had turned a shade redder than a ripe tomato.
"It's a song title…" Usagi looked for an escape route but she then remembered her shackled issue…GAH!
"If you wanted to see it so bad, Usagi.."
"NO!" Usagi screamed loudly and began to panic. She tried to bolt but L grabbed her with his free hand and brought her back up against his chest. He held the notebook so both he and she could see and read it.
Usagi tried to wiggle free but L would have none of it and he held tight to her while reading off the song titles along with the names. Light had moved to stand behind L, looking over his shoulder and blushing at the song that he had been forced to share with L.
"Usagi-chan, what is the meaning of this?" Light questioned the girl in L's arm. Usagi looked up and back over L's shoulder. Her face was still bright red and she looked like she was on the verge of passing out. Really, how could any human survive with that much blood rushing through the brain? Light watched as she shook her head in denial. When she tried to open her mouth and explain, L interrupted her yet again.
"Who knew you were so perversely creative? Our poor little bunny rabbit has been corrupted this whole time while we were fooled into believing her to be an innocent," L smirked down at the poor girl who was now red from her head to her toes. He found the situation quite funny. It never did cease to amaze him how easily she got riled up or embarrassed.
Leaning his head down, L whispered into her ear, "Is the bunny rabbit really all that curious as to …" Light couldn't hear anymore what it was that L was whispering to her; however, each and every one in the room could tell that, whatever it was, it was having a major effect on poor Usagi. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she proceeded to pass out on the spot. L tightened his grip around her so she wouldn't slip down his body. He tucked the notebook into his arm that was around her and let his now free hand pull her iPod from her pocket.
"What are you doing?" Light eyed him questioningly. L walked over to a seat, sitting normally for once and to everyone's surprise. He let Usagi sit in his lap, leaning against his chest while she snoozed. Meanwhile, his hands worked quickly to hook the iPod up to his laptop, fixing it so the songs he wished to hear would play.
Needless to say, the task force was too scared to listen past the first song, My Dick. However, curiosity got the better of them and they all listened to hear what song Usagi had picked for them. There were some really confused (Chief Yagami), angry (Misa), and just stunned (L, Light, and the remaining task members) people. They all looked towards where Usagi sat in L's lap, unconscious and still as red as when she first passed out.
She would certainly have quite a few questions to answer when she woke up…
I want to defend myself here! The only reason I know of the song, My Dick, is because I was browsing 'Top 100' songs of various genres. This was in one of the top 100's. For some reason, it was just screaming out L and Light. I mean, come on, we all know they hate each other for more than just Kira. They're ego's are being affected and nothing hurts the ego of a man then when you insult his masculinity. I warn you, that song is for mature a audience which is why I did not post the lyrics. If you want to go and look it up, feel free but don't blame me, I warned you!
Thank you to my reviewers, I hope you enjoy this chapter :)
Sesshy
Next Time…Not sure, I'm debating on what theme to use….
How bout this, you all decide which I do! Pick only one of the theme ideas I list!!!
"Laundry Day"
"Ping Pong Panic"
"Spam Attack"
So, YOU, the readers, get to pick which theme you want to see next. Simply leave your vote in a review, k? :)