The Ultimate Alliance Of Authors Episode 8 Joe Lieberman and Global Warming

The Ultimate Alliance Of Authors were heading over to a party that Hot Stuck Up Bitch was reported to be attending.

"Hey, you guys heard about Joe Lieberman?" lulamaemobster asked.

"Who's that?" ravercozy asked.

"He's a senator from the U.S. and he's trying to cockblock the nation on health care."

"This again?" ravercozy asked. "What's with your government?"

"I don't know," Morristofoxes said. "I don't know how many times someone has to say millions of people will die if this doesn't happen for you to get off the bench and into the game."

"At some point," Blame Truth added. "It comes down to being a decent human being."

"It's said that it's the job of the government to do for the people what they cannot do for themselves. Right now, the people of the U.S. are sick and they can't heal themselves so the government has to step up."

"Well said," ravercozy said.

"Here, here," lulamaemobster added.

"You know what I don't understand?" Kage Bijuu asked.

"What?"

"The fact that they don't believe in global warming."

"They're even saying that it's a hoax by Al Gore to make money," Uzumakie said.

"That's pretty fuckin' stupid," Chewie Cookies said. "They don't see how long it takes winter to get cold?"

"I saw a report on the new where there was an iceberg twice the size of Manhattan heading for Australia," Adngo417 said. "Fucked up is what that is."

"Okay, we're here," ravercozy said. "Everyone get ready.

I DO NOT OWN NARUTO AND/OR THE CHARACTERS

New Villagers

Naruto was taking the prescribed rest in the Leaf Village hospital, during the first day of he got a roommate, Shikamaru, who was hospitalized by Temari. Temari met Shikamaru at his house with a present for him.

"Here ya' go, Shikamaru" Temari said presenting him with a present.

"What's this for?" he asked confused.

"You're kidding me, right?" she asked with malice in her eyes. "You didn't for get, did you?"

"Forget what?" he asked even more confused.

Temari crushed the present and began to brutalize Shikamaru in front of his parents.

"She's going to make him very happy," his mother said hugging his father as they watched. "Don't you think?"

"Uh, yeah," Shikaku lied to avoid the same treatment.

As Shikamaru was rolled in, they were visited by the Cherry Bombs.

"Hello, Naruto," they said in unison.

"Hey, what's shakin,' girls?"

Temari walked over to Shikamaru and drew her hand back as if she was going to hit him making him flinch.

"That's two for flinching," she said as she gave him two quick kisses on the lips.

This quickly turned into a make out session as she climbed into the bed with him, while the other Cherry Bombs spoke with Naruto.

"Well, I just stopped by to see you before my shift was over," Sakura said with a scowl. "And these slut monkeys decided to get between our love again."

"Slut monkey?" Naruto said. "A new one."

"Thanks."

"Bitch, you know damn well why you came here," Hinata said. "Lady Tsunade said he needed some rest so you're just going to have to cool it down there, Hot Twat."

"Hot twat," Naruto chuckled. "Alright, y'all been reading, huh?"

As Naruto just lied there while the fought over him until Temari decided that she had her fill of her and Shikamaru fondling each other.

"You guys ready?"

"Ready?" Naruto asked. "Where are you going?"

"Oh, we're just going to hang," Temari said. "I think that we should bond if we're going to be a team."

"Bye Naruto," they said.

"Bye," he said as after they all gave him a kiss.

As soon as Shikamaru was sure they left, he had one question for Naruto.

"So how was it getting a train ran on you?"

"Honestly?" Naruto asked as he got out of bed to check if the girls were really gone.

"Yeah."

"It was fuckin' awesome," Naruto said.

"Really?"

"Yeah, there was this one girl with green hair, her name was Punku. Man, she was so skanky and I'm not being insulting, a total skankazoid."

"You like skanks?" Shikamaru asked confused.

"I didn't know it before," Naruto answered. "I mean, I love the girls but they're all so clean this chick looked like she didn't give a damn about herself."

"Nice."

"Yeah, what about you and that Reggaeku?"

"Oh, she was actually pretty cool," Shikamaru explained.

After the Cherry Bombs left to rescue Naruto for the second time, Shikamaru headed home for some clan business when he found himself enveloped in smoke until he passed out. When he woke up, he found himself naked strapped down with a naked Reggaeku straddling him smoking something.

"Those aren't the types of cigarettes Asuma-sensei smokes," he said through his coughs. "They make me feel kinda funny."

"Smoke somma dis and 'ya feel even funnier," Reggaeku said as she put what she was smoking in his lips.

He took a hit and began coughing uncontrollably, after a few minutes of smoking, he started to feel a bit lifted.

"Hey, man," he started to giggle. "You ever notice how we're ninjas?"

"Yeah, mon," she giggled with him. "We be ninjas."

"I know, it's like we're ninjas, man."

After they smoked, Reggaeku started to kiss on Shikamaru but found him asleep. She tried stroking him member but that didn't work, she tried sucking on it but that didn't work either.

"Bombaclot," she said to herself. "Looks like I and I gon' have to wait 'til later."

She put her clothes on and left him until he awoke, that's when she faced off with Temari.

"Yeah, she was cool," Shikamaru said.

The next day, the Cherry Bombs came to visit them again but found them missing with a videotape in their place. They looked at it and found a sound note with a queen's crown on the top of it.

"Oh, no the fuck, they didn't," Hinata said. "I know they didn't do what I think they've just done."

They took the tape to Lady Tsunade who was meeting with Shizune, Kurenai, and Anko.

"What's the matter with you?" Tsunade asked.

"Naruto's missing," Ino said.

"Again?" asked Anko.

"What the fuck, does he have 'kidnap me' written on his forehead," Shizune asked.

"They left this tape," Karin said.

They put the tape in and it came one to show the Queens of Sound with Naruto and Shikamaru strapped down.

"Hey, y'all look," Rappu said. "We got Naruto and Shikamaru."

They watched as they humiliated the two of them.

"High Five," Rappu said as she slapped Naruto five.

"Looked how naked he is," Punku said before she took hold of his penis. "Look at his dick, I'm suckin' on it."

They watched as she began sucking Naruto off while the other girls began to kiss and rub on each other except for Reggaeku who was already on top of Shikamaru and having her way with him. The Cherry Bombs and the older women were appalled except for Ino, Karin, and Anko who began to fidget slightly from arousal.

"That's it," Tsunade said. "I'm going with you to get them back this time.

"We're going too," Kurenai said. "It's been a while since I've seen Lady Tsunade in action."

"Lead the way, Karin," Anko said.

Karin lead them another of the Queens of Sound's hideouts, they were met on the outside by all six of the Queens.

"I gotta say that it hurts you leading them to us, Karin," Metaru said.

"You came here for nothing," Jazi said. "We're not giving them up, so, just leave and we'll let you walk away from here."

"I'm going to end you whores," Temari shouted.

As the two groups bickered, Tsunade grew tired and decided to be heard.

"I'm Lady Tsunade, who are you again?"

"We are the Queens of Sound," Punku said.

"Oh, Queens of Sound, fuck faces?" Tsunade asked making sure she got it right. "I want you to take one giant step back and literally FUCK YOUR OWN FACE!"

Tsunade's outburst caught the Cherry Bombs by surprise while Anko and the other older women just smiled seeing the woman they idolized when they started out taking the lead.

"Now, I don't know what kind of teenage love struggle you have going but Naruto and Shikamaru are Leaf Shinobi and that's my territory so whatever you're thinking you'd better think again 'cuz, otherwise, I'm gonna head over there and I will rain an ungodly fucking firestorm upon you. You're going to have to get a fucking binding Kage Summit fucking resolution to keep me from fucking destroying you, I am talking scorched earth, motherfucker. I will massacre you, I WILL FUCK YOU UP!"

After being put back in their places, the Queens looked at each other confused and a little afraid.

"Yes, ma'am," they said.

"Now," Tsunade said calming down. "If you're willing to, we can talk about this like ladies."

They all discussed the situation and came to a decision, Naruto and the sleeping Shikamaru's door opened and the light blinded them after being held in the dark.

"Please, let me go," Naruto begged not looking at who it was. "I'll do anything, I'll make you feel good."

"Looking at that thing," a female voice said. "I'm sure you'd have no trouble doing that."

Naruto looked up and found Anko approaching him with a grin on her face as she poked at his penis.

"I must say, you are gifted," Anko said.

She untied them and gave them their clothes, they came out to find Tsunade, Kurenai, and Shizune waiting on them as the Cherry Bombs and Queens of Sound both looked at each other with great hostility.

"It's good to see you again," Tsunade said to two of her top shinobi.

"What's going on?" Naruto asked.

"They've talked it out at the Hokage's request," Kurenai said.

"And it's been decided that the Queens of Sound will end their diabolical scheme and join our village," Shizune said. "Except for Reggaeku who'll be joining the Sand Village."

"So I can keep an eye on her," Temari said as she and Reggaeku stared each other down.

"You've been wonderful for business, Naruto," Tsunade smiled. "I've already received a high paying S-Class Mission for you and you've boosted recruitment. You're a regular workhorse."

"He's hung like one too," Anko said boldly.

"Hey!" the Cherry Bombs and Queens of Sound shouted in unison.

"What? They were naked when I found him."

"Yeah, it's basically why we can't let them go," Metaru said. "Giving that up would be too brutal."

"Yeah, we can agree on that," Ino said. "He's so big."

"Shikamaru too," Temari and Reggaeku said in unison.

Hearing this made Naruto and Shikamaru grin with their hands on their hips and their chests poking out.

"Yeah, it's pretty troublesome carrying this thing around," Shikamaru said a bit…cocky. "Right, Naruto."

"Believe it," Naruto said laughing as he and Shikamaru slapped each other five.

As they laughed about their gifts, the older women were looking on not believing what they heard.

"They can't be that big," Tsunade said to the other older women. "They haven't had that much sex, they couldn't possibly know."

"Anko said it's big but her freaky ass can have an orgasm from a good draft," Kurenai said. "There's only one way to find out."

"You're right," Shizune added.

"Hey, guys," Tsunade said. "How 'bout a preview of the goods."

Naruto and Shikamaru looked at each other grinning.

"Why not?"

They unzipped their pants and their penises flopped out causing the older women's jaws to drop, they slowly began to applaud as the Bombs and Queens had quite enough.

"Okay, zip it up, guys."

Before they headed home, a thought popped into Naruto's head.

"Hey, time out, time out, time the fuck out."

"What now?" Tsunade said.

"This is some bullshit," he said.

"What?" they asked.

"I didn't say anything when Karin joined because she's actually a citizen of the village and I'm not mad that this particular group of kunoichi is joining because I can see them when they're coming now but what the fuck? Can anyone become a Leaf Shinobi?"

"Naruto, I…" Tsunade was cut off as Naruto continued his tirade.

"You know how hard it was for me growing up? I had to sleep on a pissy mattress and it wasn't my piss, I didn't have good food to eat growing up. I didn't have parents to pay my tuition, I just finished paying back my student loans. Fuck Fannie Mae!"

"Naruto?" Tsunade sighed.

"What?"

"Shut up."

Naruto just shook his head and started back to the village in silent anger as they followed. They got back to the village and Naruto set the Queens that were staying in the Leaf Village up with rooms in his house until they got their own places before leaving on his first S-Class Mission with Kakashi, Yamato, and Sai. The Bombs had decided to stay in Naruto's house as well.

"We're here to make sure you horrible whores don't do anything to Naruto's house," Hinata said.

The time at the house was spent with the Bombs matching every move the Queens made, it was night time and the Queens decided that they wanted to try out Naruto's hot tub. The Bombs followed them and they sat in the hot tub looking blankly off into space for a while.

"Okay, they're gone," Karin said as she could sense Kiba and the others watching them again.

"Good," Metaru said. "What the hell is you guys problem anyway?"

"We don't like you," Ten said. "You tried to take Naruto away from us."

"Yeah, tried," Punku said. "We're apart of the village now, get over it. We are."

As they sat in the hot tub, the Queens got bored and began making out with each other, Metaru eventually moved over to Sakura but she was quickly rebuffed.

"You guys are really still mad about that?"

"Yeah, but it's not that," Sakura said. "We're not into chicks."

"Really?" Rappu asked.

"Well, Ino and Karin are," Hinata said.

"Shut up," Ino said.

"Well, we did do it," Karin said. "It wasn't anything major, she just needed some help getting off."

"You do know that Naruto loved it when we did each other, right?" Jazi asked.

"He did?" Hinata asked.

"Yeah, well, he pretended he didn't because of him being kidnapped and all," Punku said. "But we could see it in his eyes."

"Why don't you give it a try?" Metaru asked. "It's really nothing but licking stuff and sticking your finger in things."

It took a little convincing but Sakura, Hinata, and Ten eventually agreed if they took it into the house and away from any prying eyes. They went into the house and set themselves up in the largest room they could find, as the rest of them cleared the room of its furniture and put down towels, Karin went to her room to find all of her toys. She came back and dropped a handful of dildos and vibrators while she wore a strap on.

"I've been waiting to use this thing," she said as she wiggled the strap on in her hand. "Shall we get started?"

As expected, Karin and Ino went right to it while Sakura, Hinata, and Ten seemed hesitant, they were cured of this quickly as Metaru, Punku, and Rappu headed right for them.