Later that night, Scully sat on the couch, deep in thought about everything that had happened this morning. She was now in her silk pajamas, drinking a warm cup of tea, trying to relax. The steam floated slowly, warming her face. She took a long sip to warm her insides, to soothe her mind. Had her and Mulder really shared such a tender kiss? Was this a dream? She felt as if she had been rushing into things. She wasn't ready to take it to this level. But what were her feelings for Mulder? Did she truly love him? No. She couldn't let herself think that now, she couldn't let her heart get the best of her. Not when she had been assigned to debunk his work. It wasn't suppose to end up this way. They weren't suppose to fall in love. This wasn't some sappy romantic fairytale, this was reality. And reality was harsh. She wasn't Juliet, and he wasn't Romeo. They were Dana and Fox. No running away together to wed, no keeping their relationship from their family, most importantly, no suicide in the end.
She took another sip, finishing her cup of tea. The warmth remained on the outside of the cup. She kept her hand wrapped around it. It was near twelve o'clock, and she couldn't sleep. Too many thoughts, too many emotions. Running rapidly through her mind. She kept her eyes locked straight ahead, but she hadn't been focusing on anything. Not anything in front of her, that is. Or was she? Maybe something, someone had been in front of her the entire time. She never let herself take the opportunity to realize it.
"Scully." A soft, calm voice sounded as if music to her ears, causing her to fill with anxiety at the same time. She felt nervous, like a teenage girl whom had found her first crush. But she wasn't the one drawing hearts in her notebook.
Scully remained to look ahead, not moving her head toward the voice. She knew who's voice this belonged to. A voice she had been hearing say her name for several years. The non-chalant, confident voice of her partner. What was their relationship coming to? She couldn't remember thinking about him this much, never.
Mulder began to walk toward her. She could see him from her peripheral vision. He took a seat on the couch next to her, knowing something should be said. After what had happened earlier, she had been trying to keep her distance from him. Not that she didn't want to see him, but she felt nervous. Did she really want to begin a relationship with Mulder? Sure they already had a relationship. Partners, friends. But, lovers?
"How are you feeling?" He asked considerately. "I had to wait until a time Maggie was asleep so I could talk to you." He smirked, feeling like a teenage boy. Waiting for her mother to fall asleep to talk to his crush. But this wasn't high school, they weren't teenagers. They were adults, professional FBI agents. They were far from high school teenagers. That part of their lives had past, now it was time to live in the present, the future.
Scully just nodded, forcing herself to make eye contact with Mulder. She set the tea down, then looked into his hazel eyes, pressing her lips together as she tried to think of something to say. How does he do it? Scully thought to herself. She couldn't believe how he could take an anxious situation filled with nerve, and make a joke out of it, along with adding one of his smirks.
"Where does this leave us, Mulder?" Scully couldn't contain herself, she had to ask the question.
"In the beginning I was assigned to the X-Files. The first time I met you, I - I thought you were a jerk. I didn't think you'd end up meaning anything to me. Just a partner I had no choice to work with. But, when I got to know you more, I realized there's more to you than that. You became my friend, someone I could trust. But now, since -- since this morning, what's become of us, Mulder? I don't think I'm ready for this."
Mulder tried to think himself. He wanted to be more than friends. In his mind, he could admit he loved her. He knew somewhere, deep down she felt the same way. But getting her to admit it, maybe even realize it would be more of a challenge than any cases in the X-Files.
"I think we're one big X-File." Mulder joked. Scully couldn't help but laugh. The laughing didn't take long to fade away and return to seriousness. After all, this was serious. She needed to talk to him. Her heart was telling her one thing, but her mind was telling her another. She had never felt so cliched in her life.
"Scully -- You said I'm someone you trust, well, you need to trust me on this."
Mulder embraced Scully, rubbing her back gently to comfort her. He didn't want to rush her into anything, but his feelings for her were extraordinary. Scully rested her head on Mulder's shoulder, and pulled away looking into his eyes. This time, she felt the connection. There was something there when their eyes met. She tried to shake the feeling away. Mulder kissed her softly on her forehead, tucking her hair behind her ears.
"Look... I, uh." Mulder could feel himself stumbling on the words. Those three words. He wanted to say them so badly, especially to Scully. He had never felt a stronger connection for anyone else in his life.
"I love you." Mulder whispered, looking into her eyes. Scully bit her bottom lip, a single tear fell down her cheek. She didn't know what to say. Did she love him? Her heart said yes, her mind told her, no. It was wrong. Then she thought for a moment. What did she admire more? Mulder or her job. The answer was simple. Could she really let work get in the way? She was a woman after all, she had feelings. It wasn't healthy to be alone her entire life. She didn't have to be. Whenever she'd see another man, she'd just think back to Mulder. Maybe that was love.
"Mulder... We've -- we've been through a lot, with work, with our lives. But I'm done with masking feelings, I'm done with replacing simple words with speeches. Mulder, I - I... I love you." Once realizing what she had said, she felt shock. Had she said something that she would end up regretting in the long run? Or something that was meant to be said. Either way, she had to hope for the best. They both had to.
A/N - I couldn't resist adding romance. I'm such a sucker for these two. They're meant to be, it's time Scully begins to realize it in this story. No matter what's wrong or right. Cause, c'mon! They're right, right, right!! :)