Author's/Note: Long time no see, huh? I know this chapter is really really late, but to be honest I had planned on killing the story until I was smacked in the head with inspiration. Actually it was more of a textbook in orchestra that did it... Anyways, to make up for attempted murder, I have made chapter five with two sections (hence the two title names in the fic). Hopefully my brain won't take as long updating as last time.
To those who have read this and are still reading this fanfic, thank you and sorry for the long wait.
Disclaimer: This is the last time I'm typing this, so for future chapters (and this one) no I do not own Naruto nor do I make a profit off of this fanfiction.
Note: dream regular time 'thought'
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There is a light that is coming, for the ones who hold on...
The beeps of monitors and the dull repetitive whoosh from the respirator seemed to be the only sounds in the sterile hospital room. That and that incessant noise coming from the small drip that echoed in Sasuke's ear louder than any of the machines.
He sat by the wan form of his bedridden teammate in the Konoha Hospital. They had barely made it to the emergency room so it was a wonder that his teammate was still alive even with a ward of medical specialists on their side. He remembered staring at them as they grew closer to death until the other ninja had taken over; their shock subsided, immediately tending to them as Sasuke helplessly watched.
The drip of fluids shot through Sasuke's ears again, tearing a hole in his thoughts and feeding his growing guilt. When it had all happened he was sure they were already dead. Why didn't he make sure? Why didn't he try to revive them sooner? If he hadn't been so late maybe he wouldn't be here, powerless to help his, dare he say it, friend. Maybe they wouldn't be breathing through a tube and hooked up to everything imaginable, their emotionless face such a painful contrast to their usually bright and smiling one.
Sasuke glanced at a pale hand that teetered at the edge of the bed. It fell off with little grace and brought an arm with it. Without thinking, Sasuke caught it and placed it back on the creaseless white sheets.
He sat in the lonely room and held the hand for a while, listening to the steady drips as time went by.
---
Gaara awoke with a jump, his breath caught in his throat until he forced it out with gasps of air. He was sitting on an unfamiliar floor as he calmed down, his heart rate dropping back to normal. The room he was in was stale and empty, completely black except for a small slither of light from a cracked door. Noises and screams leaked from behind the wooden barrier and into the small room, bouncing off the bare walls.
Gaara stood with shaky legs, a voice in his head telling him to stay in the dark room, get away from the door, nothing good will come out of what's behind it. But he ignored it and tentatively pushed it open, an odd scene displayed before him.
It was a woman, no, his mother, in labor. The woman yelled and cursed the doctors and the officials who were idly standing by, not for her pain but for position.
My sister did not wish for your birth.
Another voice spoke in Gaara's mind, a painfully familiar one that repeated its words. It made what he was seeing even harder to look at.
The woman's shouts reverberated throughout the delivery room until a small cry was heard. A tiny baby wailed in the cold air, its hair stuck messily to its head. With the umbilical cord haphazardly severed it was laid on the floor, the am biotic fluid that covered it smeared on a straw mat that lay below it. A plain jar that had been sitting beside it was opened with great care. Characters and symbols encircled the child as the Kazekage stepped out of the crowd and began making numerous hand seals. With a pause and then a huge wave of chakra the markings on the floor swept up an aura from the opened jar and flew into the newborn, an unseen seal burning into its skin.
She became this village's sacrifice…
The woman breathed heavily until she could find the strength to speak, turning the heads of all who were in the room.
"His name… is Gaara… He is an Asura(1), whom loves and lives… for himself alone."
She gave a small chuckle as she stared at the newborn. An ominous glint shone in her weary eyes. She coughed violently and switched her view straight into the Kazekage's eyes. The woman smirked at him before a long continuous beep resounded throughout the room, masking the newborn's screams.
… and she died cursing this village.
Gaara watched the woman's eyes haze over as they stared at nothing.
You were never loved.
'What...what is this?' Gaara felt a cold grip wrap around his heart and choke him. Pain that had long ago left came back in full force.
People took their leave as doctors turned off the machines and took out the body in a large white bag. Only the wailing newborn and two others were left.
'Is that...Yashamaru?' Gaara felt himself step back out of instinct. His mind regressed back into his six year old state.
"You are to watch over him." The Kazekage picked up the now whimpering infant and held him. "Remember though, you are to watch from a distance, we cannot let him form bonds. It will dull him as a weapon."
Gaara listened paralyzed to his father's words.
"You're only to interfere with his training if it becomes life threatening to those around him. You'll be given more information when it is needed." He handed the infant over to Yashamaru. He gave a sick smile. "I'm sure you'll have no problem caring for your own nephew. It's what your sister would have wanted."
Yashamaru nodded his head in forced obedience, not bothering to try and hide his grimace as he walked past the unseen Gaara.
The next thing Gaara saw was sudden and abrupt. A mass of kunai seared through the air towards him. He stood stunned in pain as they hit. His sand was nowhere in sight.
With blood quickly soaking his clothes he fell onto his back, the kunai standing up like pillars in his body. He lay on something soft. Turning his head Gaara found it to be a pile of ruined toys. Countless parts of torn stuffed animals lay in pieces below him, remnants of past temper tantrums. Stitches were stretched and busted in those who survived dismemberment. Holes were where their eyes should have been and sand poured out of the cavities.
Pulling the weapons out, Gaara stood. He found a small door and left through it into an open street. Children were playing outside, tossing a ball back and forth between teams. They laughed and screamed until one set her eyes on Gaara. The girl stopped and pointed at him with a quivering arm.
"Monster…!" she exclaimed, turning the heads of the other children. They ran as a group in the opposite direction, their neglected ball rolling until it stopped before Gaara's feet.
A shuriken soared across the vacant street and punctured the ball, slowly deflating it. Yashamaru walked in its wake.
"You know Gaara-sama, deep down inside, I hated you."
Gaara stood motionless as his relative progressed.
"My sister did also, she had never wished for your birth."
As Yashamaru drew nearer Gaara found his sense and stepped back.
"You were never loved."
Gaara heard himself speak in a weak voice, "That's not true."
"Oh?" the other ninja seemed smug, "How do you know? You don't even know what love is."
He felt his mentality grow steadily back into his normal age. "You're the one who taught me, remember?"
Yashamaru frowned for a moment before smiling. "Then refresh my memory," he spoke with a voice that seemed to grow deeper and harsher with every syllable. Sand started to pour from every pore on the shinobi's body. Hard layers of sand enclosed a growing shape. Gaara watched as its shadow covered nearby buildings growing at an alarming rate.
The sand reincarnate stood before him.
"So tell me," it said with a booming voice, "what is love? Is it the protection I gave you? Is it the help I gave you to kill, to prove your existence? Or is it the mark I left embedded in your forehead with pieces of sediment when you needed it most."
Gaara stared at the giant, at its cold eyes. The more he gazed, the more memories began to pelt his mind, of friends. He had heard so many definitions of love; it was ironic that he found the right one from the one person who had hated him the most.
"Love is the spirit of devoting yourself to someone important and close to you…"
The demon cringed at his answer.
"It is expressed by caring for and protecting that person."
"Your not capable of love," the demon sneered. "You couldn't even protect yourself when I wasn't there, let alone someone you may find important." It laughed. "You couldn't even protect your own village; you're just like your father… Kazekage." It emphasized the last word, finding joy in Gaara's expression.
"I've done my job and watched over my village and I will continue to do so until I die." Gaara glared at it.
Shukaku laughed again as a strong wind blew past him, blowing him away in it's current.
...but it seems to be passing over me.
Sasuke dropped the fragile hand he was holding as the door to the hospital room opened. Light flooded the dimly lit room and cast a silhouette across the floor. A jounin stood in the doorway.
A mournful sky cast pieces of sunlight through scattered clouds. Bits of the light gleamed across a large stone memorial, surrounded by people. A new name had been carved into the stone, its presence odd and rushed. The letters seemed to stand out instead of sinking in to the surprisingly dull surface.
"Hokage-sama gave you an hour. It's time for you to go back now." The jounin stepped aside and held the door open further, waiting for him. Sasuke looked down at his teammate as he reluctantly stood up. He watched their chest rise and fall to the respirator's set pattern.
The clouds sent down shadows that draped over a small picture frame that sat on top of the memorial in place of the real person or body that used to be one. Funerals that were held for ninjas never did have bodies present; they were always too disfigured to show so pictures were set out to remember the person and not the mangled corpse.
"Am I allowed to see the funeral as well?"
Kakashi walked up in front of the too familiar stone as he placed a white rose on its surface for yet another person, this time a student.
"Yes, but only enough time to say goodbye and then you're to be escorted back to your cell."
Iruka came after him, listening to comrades and loved one's empty stillness behind him. He remembered his student fondly. Remembered the academy days before they became inexperienced genin. He was proud of everyone that he had seen graduate from that small building, this student as well.
"I see."
More came after him until there was a puddle of white peddles strewn in front of the pleasant picture.
Sasuke kept his head down as he left. He looked back once more. "I'll be back…
They left together in silence.
…Naruto."
The quiet steady drops from the fluid drip reverberated throughout the room as the door was shut and the room was cast in darkness again.
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Gaara awoke in a plain white room. He was lying in a simple bed with a few wool sheets. As he sat up the door opened. An Anbu agent walked in.
He looked around the sparsely furnished room for his belongings. "Where are my regular clothes? I'd like to get back to work."
The other man looked at him bewildered. "Kazekage-sama, you don't remember?"
Gaara frowned. "No, remember what?"
The shinobi searched for the right words to say before he continued. "The village…is gone."
"What!?" 'Is that what Shukaku meant in my dream?'
He looked down at the floor for a moment before looking back up into the Kazekage's eyes. Gaara sat stunned as the voice from his dream ran through his head again and the man replied.
He will be an Asura
"Shukaku—you, destroyed the city."
(1) Asura: and enemy of the gods in Hindu mythology, a demon.
A/N: I think I may have had Gaara out of character. Oh well, hopefully it wasn't too bad. Also, I'm not sure on what to make of Sasuke and Naruto's relationship. It could be their weird friendship-rival-brother thing, or it could turn yaoi. This story isn't one for romance, so I don't think the yaoi could happen. Unless it's horribly bitter. Tell me what you think. Review!