CHAPTER 15: A CRISIS AND ANOTHER RECRUIT

For the next couple of weeks, the shifts were hard but this was all for Bella so it was worth it. One night I sat on the cliff, just me and Embry wishing Quil could join us.

"You know how much this sucks?" Embry asked me.

"Yeah, it does but at least we're back together." I said.

"When my mom isn't grounding me." Embry said.

"Why can't you just bite the bullet and tell her?" I asked him.

"Because it's forbidden, to people unless they're involved." Embry said.

"She's your mom, I think that counts. Then you wouldn't be grounded all the time." I laughed.

"It's a rule and I'm not breaking it." Embry said.

"Why is this, the only rule, you chose not to break?" I asked him.

"I follow other rules." Embry said.

"Name one." I said.

"Fine whatever, but I'm not doing it." Embry said.

"Sam said he wouldn't care." I pointed out.

"Regardless, I'm not doing it." Embry said.

"I swear bro, you were donkey in a past life." I laughed.

"And you were a monkey." Embry laughed.

"Well it's about nine; I guess we should start our shift." I groaned.

"We should so get paid for this." Embry said.

"What am I gonna do with you?" I asked him.

"Who knows?" Embry laughed.

Later the beginning of that week, we all went for dessert at the Clearwaters'. We being; Bella, my dad, Charlie, the Clearwaters, Emily, Sam and I. Seth was more than overexcited to see me, the boy wouldn't stop talking and Bella just smiled at the whole scene. Sam had explained to the eager Seth, it was a coming of age thing what we and the others had been through.

"Maybe I'll get to join you guys when I'm older." Seth said eagerly.

"Yeah maybe." I said, with denial in my voice.

Bella and I snuck out to get some needed privacy. I loved Seth like a brother, but he was a very annoying younger brother. We went to my garage and chilled in the rabbit, I was really tired but I was using all my needed strength to stay awake. I missed seeing my Bella.

"You need some sleep, Jake." Bella said, concerned.

"I'll get around to it." I said and took her hand in mine.

"Is that one of those wolf things? Bella asked me. "The heat, I mean."

"Yeah. We run a little warmer than the normal person. About one-oh-eight, one-oh-nine. I never get cold anymore. I could stand like this." I said, pointing to my shirtless body. "in a snowstorm and it wouldn't bother me. The flakes would turn to rain where I stood."

"And you heal fast----that's a wolf thing, too?"

"Yeah, wanna see? It's pretty cool." I said, smiling and dug out a pocket knife.

"No, I do not want to see!" Bella shouted, realizing what I was thinking. "Put that away!"

"Fine. It's a good thing we heal, though. You can't go see just any doctor when you're running a temperature that should mean you're dead." I chuckled.

"No, I guess not." Bella said. "And being so big----that's part of it? Is that why you're all worried about Quil?"

"That and the fact that Quil's grandfather says the kid could fry an egg on his forehead." I said, losing all hope. "It won't be long now. There's no exact age…it just builds and builds and then suddenly-------"I stopped, thinking I didn't want Quil to join us. "Sometimes, if you get really upset or something, that can trigger it early. But I wasn't upset about anything---I was happy." I laughed. "Because of you, mostly. That's why it didn't happen to me sooner. Instead it just kept on building up inside me---I was like a time bomb. You know what set me off? I got back from that movie and Billy said I looked weird. That was all, but I just snapped. And then I---I exploded. I almost ripped his face off---my own father!" I shuddered, going pale.

"Is it really bad, Jake?" Bella asked anxiously. "Are you miserable?"

"No I'm not miserable." I said. "Not anymore. Not now that you know. That was hard, before." I said, leaning my cheek on the top of her head.

"What's the hardest part?" Bella whispered.

"The hardest part is feeling….out of control." I said. "Feeling like I can't be sure of myself---like maybe you shouldn't be around me, like maybe nobody should. Like I'm a monster who might hurt somebody. You've seen Emily. Sam lost control of his temper for just one second……..and she was standing too close. And now there's nothing he can ever do to put it right again. I hear his thoughts----I know what it feels like….Who wants to be a nightmare, a monster?"

"And then, the way it comes so easily to me, the way I'm better at it than the rest of them---does make me even less human then Embry or Sam? Sometimes I'm afraid that I'm losing myself."

"Is it hard? To find yourself again?" Bella asked concerned.

"At first." I said. "It takes some practice to phase back and forth. But it's easier for me."

"Why?" she wondered.

"Because Ephraim Black was my father's grandfather, and Quil Ateara was my mother's grandfather."

"Quil?" Bella asked, confused.

"His great-grandfather." I explained. "The Quil you know is my second cousin."

"But why does it matter who your great-grandfathers are?"

"Because Ephraim Black and Quil were in the last pack. Levi Uley was the third. It's in my blood on both sides. I never had a chance. Like Quil doesn't have a chance."

"What's the very best part?" Bell asked, trying to cheer me up.

"The best part." I said, suddenly smiling." Is the speed."

"Better than the motorcycles?"

"There's no comparison." I nodded full of enthusiasm.

"How fast can you…?"

"Run?" I finished. "Fast enough. What can I measure it by? We caught…….what was his name? Laurent? I imagine that means more to you than it would to someone else."

"So, tell me something I don't know." I said. "Something about vampires. How did you stand it, being around them? Didn't it creep you out?"

"No." Bella said.

"Say, why'd your bloodsucker kill that James, anyway?" I asked, curious.

"James was trying to kill me--------it was like a game for him. He lost. Do you remember last spring when I was in the hospital down in Phoenix?"

"He got that close?"

"He got very, very close." Bella said, stroking her scar.

"What's that?" I asked, stroking the scar. "This is your funny scar, the cold one." I said and suddenly gasped. She was bit!

"Yes, it's what you think it is." Bella said. "James bit me."

I don't think I could've looked more shocked, if I wanted to.

"But if he bit you……..? Shouldn't you be………….?" I choked.

"Edward saved me twice." Bella whispered. "He sucked the venom out----you know, like with a rattlesnake."

I was shaking with fury, not trying to but I was.

"Careful, Jake. Easy. Calm Down." Bella said, comforting me.

"Yeah." I panted. "Calm."

"You okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, almost. Tell me something else. Give something else to think about."

"What do you want to know?"

"I don't know." I said, my eyes closed trying to calm the beast inside me. "The extra stuff I guess. Did any of the other Cullen's have………extra talents? Like the mind reading?"

"Jasper could……….sort of control the emotions of the people around him. Not in a bad way, just to calm someone down, that kind of thing. It would probably help Paul a lot." Bella added, trying to lighten up the mood. "And then Alice could see things that were going to happen. The future, you know, but not absolutely. The things she saw would change when someone changed the path they were on……….."

I suddenly noticed her looking a little pale.

"Why do you do that?" I asked, back in control. "You do that when you're upset. Why?"

"It hurts to think about them? Bella whispered. "It's like I can't breathe………..like I'm breaking into pieces…….."

"It's okay Bella, its okay. I won't bring it up again. I'm sorry." I said, smoothing her hair.

"I'm fine," she gasped. "Happens all the time. Not your fault."

"We're a pretty messed-up pair, aren't we?" I said. "Neither one of us can hold our shape together right."

"Pathetic." Bella agreed.

"At least we have each other." I said, comforted by that.

A couple weeks later I was running, I was running an emergency shift with Embry, I was pissed at myself. I promised Bella I'd entertain her and all I had been doing was sleeping and lounging around the house. Today I promised to go cliff diving and we were suddenly called to duty. But once this Victoria was gone, things would be easier. Suddenly there she was right before Embry and I, she saw us and started sprinting the other way.

*Game on.* Embry smiled.

We chased her for a while and I gave the heads up to the others and we chased her to the edge of a cliff. She quickly dove off the edge and swam like only a bloodsucker could. I turned my head for a second and that's when I saw it. I watched as Bella plummeted off the cliff and into the icy waters below. I looked to Sam, pleading with him.

*Go to her.* Sam said.

I didn't give him a chance to say anything else. As I got to the beach, I phased back to my human form faster than I ever had before. I swam almost as fast as that bloodsucker toward my Bella. I dove down and found her in a daze and quickly brought her to shore in my arms. I administered CPR and I look at her in worry. She finally opened her eyes and I became angry.

"What were you thinking? You could've been killed!" I yelled at her.

But she looked so fragile, laying there and shivering in my arms. I held her close and then heard a painful howl. Sam came running out of nowhere and turned fast. He heaved a sigh of relief, knowing Bella was safe.

"What is it?" I asked, panicked.

"It's Harry Clearwater, that bloodsucker got to him." Sam sighed.

"No!" I cried.

"You can grieve later Jacob. You must bring Bella back home and meet the rest of us at the Ateara's place. Quil finally snapped, he's unconscious and Embry's with him. Please hurry back." Sam said.

"Don't you start without me." I said, sternly.

"Understood." Sam nodded.

I scooped up Bella in my arms and ran at full speed to my house, I had to drive her home fast and keep my bro from going insane.