"You can do this," he murmured in my ear, placing his hand on the small of my back to lead me into Shadybrook. My father walked ahead of me, flanked on either side my brothers. He had promised Lucky that he would maintain a truce with Nikolas for the time being. Things were going to be difficult enough without having to worry about a Spencer-Cassadine battle.

"I don't know if we should even be here," I hear Emily murmur to Elizabeth as they walk behind us. Emily holds a sleeping Spencer in her arms as she quietly pads through the sterile hospital corridor. Cameron rests easily on Liz's hip as she moves next to her best friend. "I know that Laura would want you here, you were like a daughter to her. She doesn't know anything about me and Nikolas, though. I might be in the way."

"Nikolas is going to need you," I say over my shoulder, grabbing Dillon's hand for additional support. "We all need someone." Dillon smiles over at me knowingly as we reach the quiet waiting room.

I can't desert Lulu right now.

"I am going to go in first," my father declared as he paused outside the door. "I don't know what to expect, I don't know how to do this. I know that you want answers, I don't have them. We just have to do this in the best way we know how."

Lucky nodded. "We understand, Dad. We'll do whatever we need to do. This isn't about anyone but Mom."

"Just go in there and be with Laura," Nikolas prodded. "You're the first person she would want to see. I'm sure she's already asking for you."

"Gumdrop?" Luke asked as he turned his gaze to me.

I shrugged. "You heard my brothers. I trust them. I trust you."

My father smiles warmly, an uncharacteristic display of affection. My mother has always brought out the best in him. "Here it goes," he sighed with a deep breath before slipping into the room.

I want to make you happy. So I can't really take your emotions out of the equation. I love you.

Dropping Dillon's hand, I look to where Lucky is leaning against the wall. His dark tresses are mussed, the result of his relentless nervous habit of raking his fingers through his hair. I know that he is probably in the most agony. He has the best memories of our mother, the story of her life at her happiest. "It's okay, Lucky," I murmured as I reach out and pull him into a hug. He buried his face in my shoulder, his body racked with sobs. Over my shoulder, I can see my oldest brother watching on. "Come here, Nik."

"She's awake," Nikolas cried as he wrapped his arms around me from behind. Sandwiched between my brothers, we're a bundle of tears. "I can't believe we're doing this. We're going to see Mom."

Lucky laughed. "Mom waited her entire life to see us like this. She'd be happy to know that we were going to go through this together."

"We're going to go get some coffee," Emily announced quietly from behind us.

"We'll be back soon," Elizabeth added as she struggled to reach for her bag again.

Dillon lifted it and threw it over his shoulder. "Do you want anything?"

Stepping away from Dillon, I grab his wrist. "I want you to stay. I want you to go in there with me. I can't do this without you."

We conceived a child together, okay, for all the wrong reasons.

He shook his head resolutely. "No, you have to do this on your own. I'm going to be here when you're done. You need to do this for your mother," he explained quietly before kissing me on the forehead and rubbing my stomach. "I'll be back by the time you come out. I love you."

Nikolas, Lucky and I watched sadly as our counterparts retreated for the safety of the cafeteria. There is so much my mother doesn't know. She doesn't know that Nikolas married and divorced Emily, that he fell in love with Courtney, that he has a son, that he has found his way back to Em. She doesn't know that Elizabeth and Lucky finally got married, that she has Cameron, that they are going to have another child. She doesn't know about Dillon, that I've fallen helplessly in love with him. She doesn't know that I am going to have her second grandchild a few weeks before Liz has her third.

Nikolas pulled me toward an empty chair. "You shouldn't be on your feet. I know all this stress isn't good for the baby," he patronized me like only an older brother could. I exchanged a glance with Lucky, who smiled wryly as he sat down next to me. "Who is going to go in first?"

All I'm saying is that Lulu might be in serious trouble and I can't not help.

I looked at Nikolas and then Lucky. Then, they looked at each other. "I don't know," Lucky stated evenly.

"Lucky should go in," I decided. "Something tells me that she would want to see him first. Not for any particular reason, I just know that she would want to see him."

Nikolas smiled politely. "You're probably right."

"Are you sure? Maybe you should go, you're the oldest," he offered. "Or maybe Lu should go, she's the youngest."

"That's exactly why you should go first," I said. "You are always thinking of someone else first. Your mind is completely on Mom right now, not yourself. You're not thinking about what you have to hide from her or how disappointed she is going to be."

Lulu, if you are being forced to lie right now, say "the snow is great."

"Lu, I'm not perfect," he protested. "I'm ashamed of my actions over the past few months. I'm embarrassed that I am in recovery and that I have put my wife and son through hell."

"We've all messed up," Nikolas commiserated. "We're not perfect. But we are a family and we do love each other. And our mother has always loved us exactly for who we are. I know it's been four years, but I don't think that part of her has changed."

Just as the final word slips from Nikolas' mouth, my father sauntered into the hall. "She's awake, and she is asking to see her children," he proclaimed as he sighed deeply. Collapsing in a chair, he clutched his head in hands. "You have to go in one at a time. Her memory is still very foggy. Who wants to go first?"

Forget I was stupid enough to care.

"We decided that Lucky should go first," Nikolas revealed as he slung his arm around my shoulders.

Luke bobbed his head. "That's fine. Just go on in. I'm going to go for a walk."

"No!" I shouted, my father recoiling at my loud voice. "I'm sorry, please stay. I need you to tell me how she is. I need to know about my mother."

"She asked about you first," he mused. "Right after she realized that who I was, she asked about you. She wanted to know about our beautiful daughter."

I decided to grow up. If you love me, you would accept that.

"Does she understand what is going on?" I stammered, my father shaking his head sadly in response. It's been a few minutes since Lucky disappeared inside the room, but it feels like hours. "I'm glad she asked about me."

The door to her room opened and Lucky emerged. His face was worn and tired, full of emotion and grief. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand before running his fingers through his hair yet again. "Lulu, it's your turn."

"Maybe Nikolas should go," I mumble.

Lucky shook his head. "It's your turn, Lulu," he declared firmly. My older brother, the most important person in my life next to Dillon, is giving me an order to do something he knows I don't want to do. He knows me well enough to know that I have to be told to do it.

"Okay," I agreed quietly, slowly standing up to gain my composure.

My father squeezed my hand as I passed. "You can do this."

Beside him, Nikolas grinned reassuringly. "We're right out here if you need us."

Lucky is the last address me before I see my mother coherent for the first time in four years. He hugged me tightly. "Just remember, she loves you. And I love you."

"I love you, too, Big Brother," I vow before pushing the heavy door open. My mother is sitting in her usual rocking chair, her straw blonde hair just visible above its high back. Time seems to stand still as she turns to look at me. Her jaw drops, her hand flying to cover her mouth.

"Lulu?"

"Hi, Mom."