A/N: I apologize for my horrible updating habits. I've been busy with homework and a club fundraiser so I've been creatively tapped out. But now I'm officially on Spring Break, so I should be able to get a couple chapters up this week. This chapter will be the first set during the original Boondock Saints. I couldn't think of anything to fill in the gap. Anywho, hope this turned out okay. Please read and review.

1999

It was one of Connor and Murphy's favorite days of the year: March 17th, Saint Patrick's Day. The boys enjoyed nothing more than being able to combine their faith, love of Ireland, pride in their Irish heritage, and penchant for drinking into 24 hours of merriment. Their first stop, as always, was the church down the block from their illegal loft to attend Saint Patrick's Day Mass. They seated themselves on a pew beside a woman with a 7-or-8-year-old daughter, spoke not a word to anyone, and dropped to their knees to pray. They occasionally rubbed their rosaries and muttered a few words in Latin. The little girl quickly stopped paying attention to the priest and stared in fascination at the two big men beside her.

"Stop that!" her mother hissed. "It's rude to stare."

Connor and Murphy didn't move or appear to even be breathing until the monsignor began to deliver his sermon. They stood up and started down the center aisle, taking no notice of the scandalized look on the face of a young priest who made to stand up before another priest whispered something in his ear. Connor and Murphy genuflected before the enormous statue of Jesus set up on the altar, kissed the statue's feet, crossed themselves again, and stood up to leave the church. Donning their sunglasses at the door, they paused to hear the last bit of the monsignor's sermon.

"Now we must all fear evil men," he began, "but there is another kind of evil that we must fear most...and that is...the indifference of good men."

Connor and Murphy pushed open the heavy front door of the church, walked into the bright sunlight, and trotted down the short set of steps in front of the church. With perfect synchronicity, each lit up a cigarette.

"I do believe the monsignor's finally got the point," said Connor.

"Aye," agreed Murphy.

The brothers walked down to a bridge, where they finished their cigarettes while gazing down at the river; both found this activity to be a soothing start to the day. Next, they started in the direction of the meatpacking plant where they both worked. Murphy playfully shoved Connor in the back.

"I'm walkin', don' fuckin' push me, Murph," groused Connor.

Though he was definitely more of a morning person than Murphy, Connor was never in a good mood before breakfast.

The twins stopped off at a bakery for a cup of coffee and doughnut apiece to enjoy on the rest of the trek to work. Once at the meatpacking plant, the brothers went to the locker room to put on their uniforms.

"This makes me feel like a doctor," said Murphy, adjusting the collar of his white lab coat.

Connor snickered. "Le's get ta work then, Doogie Howser."

Shortly before lunch, Connor stepped outside for a midmorning cigarette break. He'd barely started smoking when someone called out from the loading dock, "Hey, Connor!" and beckoned him inside. Connor sighed and ground out his cigarette with the toe of his boot. When he walked into the prep room, his fellow employees stared at him, some of them barely concealing smirks.

"What?" asked Connor.

Suddenly, there was a loud, sickening, wet slap. Connor was momentarily dazed by a blow Murphy had fetched him with a large piece of raw meat. Coming to his senses, Connor pushed Murphy down onto a metal counter, seized what looked like a pig's leg from a tray, and began hitting Murphy around the face with it. Murphy laughed and put up his arms to protect his head. Their coworkers were laughing too.

"Who's the master?" Connor shouted, triumphantly holding the pig's leg over his head.

Murphy, still on his back, took advantage of Connor's distraction. He put one leg behind his brother's back and hooked the other around Connor's waist, trying to throw him off-balance. Connor noticed and attempted to hit Murphy again with the pig's leg. They suddenly noticed their supervisor approaching them, along with what appeared to be a very large woman neither twin had ever seen before. Murphy quickly released Connor and stood up, both acting as though they hadn't been fighting on the clock and with company products, no less.

"This is Rosebaum Gurtle." said their supervisor, indicating the large woman. "Wait, no, that's not right. Rosenb--"

"Rosengurtle Baumgartner," said the large woman irritably.

Connor and Murphy noticed she had several odd piercings, including a nose ring. Underneath her lab coat was a flannel shirt that appeared to have had the sleeves roughly torn off.

"Pleasure ta meet ya, Rosie," said Connor, ever the charmer.

"I prefer to be called Rosengurtle by men," she said coldly.

That was when both twins saw the tattoo across the woman's throat, which read "Untouched By Man."

"Well, you're gonna be trainin' her today," their supervisor went on. "So do a good job."

"Aye, we will," Connor promised.

He and Murphy looked at each other, both sharing a thought: This was gonna be an interesting shift...