Piece of Cake

Jessa yawned as Ali finished hooking the laptop up to the TV. Her friend declared that since it was a rainy day, it was "Watch the New and Remaining Episodes of InuYasha" day. Jessa didn't want to because she knew that the bad guy always dies and the bad guy just happened to be her favorite character.

"Does Sesshomaru die?" Jessa asked dryly, seeing Ali flip her off in return. Jessa chuckled as she sat in her chair, waiting for Ali to speed to Hulu and find the episodes.

"Does Kagome die at least?" Jessa asked with a whine.

"Nope!" Ali replied. She was a major Kagome/Sesshomaru shipper and the fact that Sesshomaru ended up saving Kagome from Inuyasha made her THAT much more annoying to Jessa, who was a major "I want Kagome to die horribly" and "I want Sesshomaru to get with Jaken, just to piss everyone off" shipper.

"Come on! Only the bad guys die? I am turning blue over here! Let a good guy die! Let a good guy die!" Jessa chanted angrily.

"What do you see in Naraku? He's an asshole, he ruins lives, and he kills people!" Ali retorted.

"Anarchy! Anarchy! Anarchy! Anarchy!" Jessa cheered while clapping wildly.

"His stupid ass dies anyway! Haaaaaah!" Ali laughed back loudly.

"I'm sure he dies with dignity," Jessa said back.

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"I just…wanted Kikyo…to love me." Were Naraku's last words. Ali looked over and did all in her power to keep from erupting in laughter. Jessa's mouth was wide open as she stared at the TV, half in shock and the other half in anger.

"Kikyo? That bitch died years ago! You fucking killed her! What the fuck? Fucking moron! I defended you and now I get this stupid ass romantic Naraku at the very end? You should've killed Kagome and conquered Earth! Fucking moron!" Jessa hollered angrily as Ali finally fell into laughter.

"And what are you laughing about, bitch? Kagome obviously married Inuyasha and Sesshomaru is obviously still single! Face!" Jessa shouted spitefully.

"Yeah, well, at least Sesshomaru didn't get KILLED by Kagome! Ahahaha! Some bad ass Naraku was! Killed by the girl who, and I quote Jessa, "Can't even run five Goddamn steps before tripping!" Haha, face to you! Face!"

"Oh my God, Rumiko, were you smoking pot? Were you drunk? Lazy? Gahhhh!" Jessa whined, sitting back down in her chair.

"Kagome will go to Sesshomaru. Inuyasha is too annoying." Ali insisted.

"You must be on something. Kagome is annoying as fuck. Why would Sesshomaru be like, "Hm, she left my brother and came to me…FUCK HER!" Nah, it's not going to happen, Ali." Jessa replied knowingly. She and Sesshomaru had a conversation about Kagome. He would sooner fall in love with his pants than her.

"He'll take the fact that she realizes he's better into consideration."

"No he won't! He'd fly away and leave her standing there."

"He saved her from Inuyasha! You just saw it! And he let her grab onto his fluff!"

"Ok, for one, that sounded really dirty, two he knew she could help defeat Naraku with her powers and three, he didn't want to listen to Inuyasha bitch and whine about killing Kagome. Sesshomaru can only take so much before snapping."

"He saved her because he likes her!"

"You are fucking delusional! God, you make me want to kick a baby!

"He likes her!"

"He gave her the death glare when she called him brother-in-law! Oh, and guess what, she called him brother! Which means she won't be calling him husband any time soon! Face!" Jessa replied quickly.

"Yeah well, she killed Naraku."

"That's fine, he needed to die if he did all of that just to win over a dead bitch. I'm over him." Jessa sighed.

"At least they'll be together in Hell."

"Hah! Joke's on you, asshole! Naraku is Muslim, so he's not going to Hell." Jessa laughed back.

"Hahaha, no he's not!" Ali laughed hysterically.

"Dude, he was definitely in the religion of Terrorism,"

"You mean Islam,"

"Eating Jews."

"Haha, you're going to Hell."

"You're going to Hell just for being delusional, so I won't be lonely."

"Is Sesshomaru still stuck in Super Smash Bros?" Ali asked.

"Yup."

"Any clue on how to get him out?"

"Nope."

Jessa walked out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel. She had just finished showering and was feeling the relaxation mode kicking in. She dried herself off thoroughly and dropped her towel on the floor, looking for clothes.

"Did you think you would be rid of me so soon?" a smooth voice asked. Jessa turned around and screamed, quickly picking her towel up and covering herself from the demon lord, who sat on her bed.

"Wha…you…Smash Bros…how?" Jessa stuttered.

"The other human girl found the button. It disappears after being used and seems to reappear on a different device." Sesshomaru explained, but he saw the fury rising in Jessa like the temperature on boiling water.

"Get…out of my…room!" Jessa snarled warningly, pointing at her door. Sesshomaru stood up and headed for the door, an arrogant smirk pulled onto his face.

"I don't see what the problem is…you're not much to look at." He commented.

"Out!" Jessa barked, but he was already gone. Jessa quickly got dressed while mumbling to herself. Not much to look at?

"When compared to Kagura's huge tits, I guess not," Jessa growled under her breath, brushing her wet hair while blow-drying it. When she was finished, she walked into the kitchen and sighed, wondering what to eat for lunch.

"Now that we are together again, group hug!" Ali sang, only to be ignored by Jessa and Sesshomaru, both ignoring each other as well. Jessa closed the fridge door and grabbed her keys.

"I need some me time…don't follow." Jessa announced, walking out to the SUV. She drove away quickly, leaving her friend and demon lord alone.

"Wow, she's really taking his death hard. Haha." Ali giggled to herself as she looked at Sesshomaru.

"Does she normally run away from her problems?" Sesshomaru asked.

"No, she usually ignores them."

"I see."

After waiting for a few hours, Sesshomaru decided that Jessa had enough alone time with herself and it was time to help him find the stupid button and send him home. He was tired of this world and definitely did not want to go back to the video game world. He flew in the air, searching for a trace of her scent. He found it and raced towards her. He found the SUV parked in a patch of grass, beneath a tree and saw Jessa sitting in the back seat, leaned against the door. She was reading a book and was listening to her iPod, so she didn't see or hear the demon lord's approach.

"Lazy human," Sesshomaru said, opening the door and hearing her yelp of surprise as she fell out, but Sesshomaru acted fast and caught her before she hit the ground. There were to be no injuries this day to keep her from helping him. He stood her on her feet and backed away.

"Really?" she asked him angrily.

"I could have let you hit the ground." Sesshomaru replied simply. Jessa huffed as she placed her book inside the vehicle, closing the door.

"Ok, you win that argument." Jessa replied, locking the vehicle and switching songs on her iPod. She began walking away and turned back to Sesshomaru, motioning for him to come with her. He took a small leap and was instantly next to her, walking down the hill with her.

"Alright, so the button was on the remote, it was on the Wii controller, where was it this last time?" Jessa asked him.

"The same device that sent me into the game."

"Ok, so this thing is quirky and goes where it wants…damn, I wish there was a pattern or something to pick up on." Jessa exhaled, stuffing her hands in her pocket.

"Were you feeling any strong emotion?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Boredom…if that's even an emotion." Jessa replied.

"Hm, how annoying," Sesshomaru growled, concluding that it was just a fluke on how the button reappeared. He saw Jessa nod in agreement, but something else caught his attention. It was quick and dark, but Sesshomaru knew he saw something. He stopped walking and so did Jessa, who was looking at him questionably.

"What?" she asked him softly. Immediately, Jessa felt something snake around her waist and jerk her away from Sesshomaru, but he caught her arm and swiped his claws over her head, slashing the monster. It roared angrily and retreated back into the forest. Jessa looked behind her and blinked before looking back at Sesshomaru.

"Nice reflexes." She said to him, acting as if nothing happened.

"You should leave. I'll kill it." Sesshomaru said, running of towards the demon's scent. Jessa frowned as she watched his form disappear into the trees. Where were all the demons coming from? Were there more dumb ass buttons?

"Hm, I wonder," Jessa mumbled as she ran back to the SUV. When she arrived, Sesshomaru landed next to her and glared into the trees.

"It cannot be cut. I only startled it." Sesshomaru stated.

"What? Is it made out of gas or something?" Jessa asked him. Sesshomaru looked down at his hand and held it up. Jessa saw his hand and halfway up his arm was slightly burned. It was already healing, though.

"Some sort of foul-smelling liquid." He answered.

"Yeah, it did smell like straight ass…wait…you did cut it," Jessa said, but Sesshomaru frowned.

"No, I only startled it." He insisted.

"No, no, no, I heard it rip open, you did cut it…I have an idea!" Jessa called out as she ran back into the trees. Sesshomaru growled, but followed the girl anyway. He saw her find the demon and run straight at it. The demon snarled and grabbed her again and Sesshomaru saw it solidify right in front of him.

"Disgusting vermin," Sesshomaru said as he sliced the demon's head off with a single swipe of his claws. The head and body dissipated instantly and Jessa landed on her feet, smiling widely. She then began dancing in place, still smiling.

"What are you doing?" Sesshomaru asked her.

"My victory dance!" she replied; now doing the Robot.

"Stop…you look foolish."

"But I won!" she said back, now waving her body side to side.

"I killed it." Sesshomaru shot. Jessa placed her hands on her hip as she looked at him smugly.

"But it was my idea." She giggled. Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed as he looked away, crossing his arms inside his sleeves.

"Are you done yet?" He asked, avoiding the conversation entirely.

"Almost!" she replied, finishing off with a few more moves and running up to him quickly. Sesshomaru's hand shot out and shoved her onto the ground. Jessa looked up and saw him pout before walking away.

"Hahaha! You're such a child!" Jessa laughed, picking herself off the ground and running after him. Sesshomaru heard her approaching footsteps, but they didn't slow down. He felt her hand softly hit his arm as she ran by him.

"You're it!" she called back. Sesshomaru snorted. Was she serious? He took one leap and almost landed on her, but he slowed down on purpose. It would be a shame to end the game so soon. He followed her into the trees again and found that she was running down into the untamed trees where a small creek flowed. She ran across a fallen tree to avoid the water, running up the steep drop. Sesshomaru landed in front of her, startling her entirely. She gasped and felt herself losing balance and falling backwards. Sesshomaru tapped her forehead with a single claw.

"You're it." He said before applying slight pressure and sending her falling backwards.

"Ahh! Oh shit!" she yelped, twisting around and catching herself. She slid down and grabbed a low hanging branch to keep from falling into the water, panting as she looked up at Sesshomaru. The demon lord looked flawless, as usual, standing at the top, his arms crossed as his golden eyes stared back down at the girl.

"Impressive…for a human girl." He stated with malice. Jessa glared and ran up the hill, reaching to hit him, but he almost vanished from moving so quickly. He hovered in the air before landing behind her. Jessa spun around and was so close to hitting him that she felt the wind from his movements. Sesshomaru landed behind her again and exhaled.

"Too slow." He taunted tonelessly. Jessa kicked her foot back and barely missed him. She knew he was being slow on purpose. He was merely toying with her, showing her who was the better one in this game of tag. Jessa saw him running towards the lake and sprinted after him, dodging trees and roots and numerous different plants. Sesshomaru was now leaping from tree branch to tree branch slowly, looking textbook perfect and handsome while doing so. Jessa just wanted to beat him senseless with a stick. It just wasn't fair that a man looked prettier than she did and he was the one running from her.

"At least you're keeping up." Sesshomaru stated, standing on a branch and looking straight down at her. Jessa looked back up at him and stared almost mindlessly. Sunlight was shining right behind him through the branches and leaves. He looked like an angel.

"I hate you." She voiced out loud.

"Heh, as you should. Are you going to tag me any time soon or shall we crown me as the triumphant one before you embarrass yourself?" Sesshomaru asked cruelly. He saw Jessa pick up a stick and hurl it at him. He leaned to the side and heard it fall on the ground below him.

"Not on your life, pal!" she shouted back, chasing him out of the trees and into the clearing where the huge pond sat, reflecting the sunlight beautifully. Sesshomaru almost stopped running just to look at it and take in the sights. He eventually stopped a few feet where the water met the ground and turned around. He saw Jessa stop a short distance away from him, bend over and pant tiredly.

"Humans are so weak and useless. You wouldn't even make a decent pet. You're already out of breath and the game lasted only three minutes." Sesshomaru stated simply. He felt hands shove him down onto the ground, which was fine. He let her push him just to humor her.

"Hah! And I'm not meant to be a pet, dick!" Jessa breathed, but the next thing she knew was Sesshomaru grabbing her arm and pulling her down and then using his foot to catapult her over himself and halfway across the pond, where she landed in the water head first. Sesshomaru stood up and watched as Jessa swam back and crawled out of the water, collapsing on her back and sighing.

"There goes my iPod. Good thing I left my phone back in the SUV." She commented, looking up when she saw a shadow loom over her.

"You're still it." Sesshomaru commented. Jessa rolled her eyes as she exhaled.

"You win. I'm tired." Jessa said back. Sesshomaru sat down and pulled a few blades of grass out of the ground and sprinkled them over her face.

"You give up too easily." He stated.

"I'm ambitious, but I'm not stupid. I know when to give up." She replied.

"Hmph." Sesshomaru huffed. He believed in fighting until the last breath. There had been only three times in his life where he had to retreat from a battle and two of them were battles with Inuyasha. The other time…he'd rather forget about it.

"I should've brought my fishing pole. It's a nice day to fish." Jessa commented, snapping the dog demon from his thoughts.

"You smell of fish." Sesshomaru replied sharply, not even meaning to. It was like he had no control over his mouth when he was around Jessa.

"You smell of dog." She retorted just as sharply, keeping a straight face until Sesshomaru looked at her with a face that said, "What the fuck? Really?" She began giggling as she sat up, brushing off the grass the dog demon showered on her face. Jessa stood up and freaked out suddenly.

"Oh dude, History of the World Part One is supposed to come on! We have to go!" Jessa exclaimed as she ran away, sprinting back to the path she and Sesshomaru took. She turned around and saw him still sitting and staring out at the pond.

"Hellooooooo! Are you coming or not?" Jessa called out, waving to him obnoxiously. Sesshomaru stared back and stood up, once again closing the distance between them with one jump.

"Since you insist on being a nuisance," Sesshomaru growled at her, stopping the rest of the sentence in order to save himself from being verbally attacked by her.

Later that night, Jessa was once again alone. Sesshomaru had disappeared, again, and Ali insisted that she was done with him being mean, again, and now Jessa had the living room all to herself…again. She sat in her chair and idly flipped through the channels, looking for anything to pop out at her. She saw Milo plop down on the floor next to her and let out a huge sigh. She petted the dog's stomach and looked back at the TV, instantly yawning and feeling tired. She turned the TV off and headed for her room.

"Going to bed so soon?" Sesshomaru asked, stepping inside the sliding glass door, the gentle, nighttime breeze coming in with him.

"Yeah, I'm tired. Plus, I have to get started on my project for my English class tomorrow. I only have a few days left of break." Jessa explained.

"Break?"

"Spring Break. I get one week off from school and my job and use it to relax…instead I got you. Funny, how that works."

"I see. Should I not bother you tomorrow?"

"No, please do, I'm going to hate this project with the fiery hot passion of Hell. I need someone to distract me."

"So I am merely a distraction?" Sesshomaru asked with slight offense. He was Lord Sesshomaru, demon lord of the West, not the demon lord of Distract Me From Life. Jessa walked up to him and patted his shoulder while laughing.

"Haha, that's a step up from white punching bag and two steps up from white pile of shit." She insisted, still laughing heartily. Sesshomaru frowned. Was that truly what she thought of him as for the past few days? Of course, his thoughts and names for her were not polite, either, but he was Sesshomaru, what could anybody do to him?

"Damn it, now I'm not sleepy anymore…I'm hungry." Jessa commented as she turned the kitchen light on, opening the fridge and leaning into it to find something to munch on. Sesshomaru rolled his eyes. She was probably just hungry to begin with. She got her moods mixed up with hunger all the damn time.

The next day, Sesshomaru woke up to the sound of fingers hitting a keyboard lightly. He had slept sitting up against the couch and figured that Jessa playing God of War III would wake up, but instead, her grumbling comments and typing woke him.

"God, this is so fucking stupid. Dumb ass English." Jessa growled.

"Then why waste your time on it?" Sesshomaru asked.

"I have to get a good grade so I can go to college and make something of myself. I'm sure you can agree with me that knowledge and education are good attributes to life." Jessa replied.

"If only Inuyasha would realize that. Sad, I now hold you higher than him, and you're just a filthy human." Sesshomaru replied truthfully.

"Gee…thanks." Jessa replied dryly, glaring at him over the top of her laptop screen for a moment before looking back down and returning to her project. Sesshomaru stood up and felt his pride sizzle away when his stomach made the most obnoxious sound.

"Hahaha…hungry?" Jessa asked him with a wide smile. Sesshomaru said nothing as he snorted and looked away. Of course he was hungry. Why else would his stomach make such a noise?

"Yeah, me too." Jessa chirped.

"You're hungry? That's a first." Sesshomaru replied dryly as he followed her to the kitchen.

"Haha, I know, I know." She said back, waving her hand at him, as if dismissing his comments. She pulled out a package and smirked arrogantly.

"I feel the need to grill out. Barbeque hamburgers…awaaaaay!" Jessa cheered as she began preparing the meal.

"Will I die if I eat it?" Sesshomaru asked, poking the raw meat with his claw.

"I don't know…try it and see." She retorted bluntly, squishing the meat into patties with her hands.

"I am a demon, I do not eat human food." Sesshomaru stated arrogantly.

"Yeah, right and I'm an American and I hate demons." Jessa commented.

"Naraku is a demon."

"Half demon and he was born human."

"You hate Kagome and she is human."

"I hate Cowgome because she makes girls look like we are weak and just have big ass mouths."

"Cowgome…I'll have to remember that one. And you are not weak and you do not have a big mouth?" Sesshomaru asked her.

"I'm American, this conversation excludes me for that exact reason. Stay on subject, Spartacus." Jessa shot back, shaking her finger in the air as she continued preparing the meal. Sesshomaru opened his mouth, but no sound came out. What the fuck was a Spartacus? The next thing Jessa knew was Sesshomaru's fist connecting with the top of her head harshly.

"Ow, my life!" she shouted.

"Pathetic human girl." Sesshomaru replied with a growl.