A/N; Woot! Chapter 9, up and running. You may notice that I've changed the rating on this story from K+ to T….that's because this chapter sort of led me to some unexpectedly darker scenes, and I supposed it was better to be safe than sorry. I apologize for any grammatical errors, I was pretty sleepy when proofreading this. Enjoy!
Disclaimer; I own nothing. Alice in Wonderland the novel belongs to Lewis Carroll, and the film belongs to Tim Burton.
Dreams of a Memory
Chapter 9
"We'd better get started, then."
Alice smiled at him. That brightness in his gaze, that plain, almost calm spread of the smile over his missing teeth…the deceptive tip of a hidden iceberg, the riot of mad thoughts and unrestrained feeling coursing just beneath the still waters….that was the Hatter she knew. That was the dear lunatic she remembered from what everyone back home had dismissed as her childhood "delusions"….that was the face she had not once, but twice let herself be beguiled into believing had been nothing more than an imaginary friend….or worse, nothing more than a dream.
But no more. She would never allow herself to forget him again. Not ever.
"It's good to have you back, Tarrant," she said softly.
For a moment, his smile faltered consciously, his mouth opening as if he were going to say something. She waited, but the words wouldn't come…finally, his eyes darted sharply away to glance out the window.
"Look!" he pointed, and stood up abruptly from the settee, the springs creaking and Alice bobbing slightly up and down. "The rain's stopped."
Alice looked after him out the window. Everything was still shadowy and blue, but the drops had stopped falling and a few cautious rays of pale sunshine were dabbing at the edges of the clouds. The Hatter swung the door open and took a deep breath of fresh air, then looked back at her with an energetic grin.
"What are you doing lollygagging under that quilt?" he demanded, scuttling across the room and retrieving his hat from beneath a trundle bed inexplicably propped on top of a nightstand and a stone bird bath. "There isn't a moment to spare! We have only forty-three thousand, six hundred and twenty-one---"
At that instant, from somewhere in the chaotic mess of the living room came the squawking chirp of a cuckoo clock, announcing five cheerful caws.
"---make that forty-three thousand, six hundred and twenty…" the Hatter corrected himself, snatching his coat from the settee and seamlessly slipping his arms into it, "….minutes in which to find some needle-in-the-proverbial-haystack loophole that will allow you to divert the temporal law of time and space itself to the degree of disproving the stone-written predictions of an age old, all-knowing magical entity that has governed Underland since time immemorial…."
The Hatter spoke rapidly all in one breath, whipping the quilt from Alice's shoulders as he did and replacing it with her now fire-dried cloak, then promptly pushing her to her feet and all but propelling her towards the door, ignoring her alternating protests and gasps of laughter.
"…and," he concluded as they stepped outside, shutting the door behind them, "…I'm afraid I shall require, at minimum, 60 of those precious seconds each day for afternoon tea. After all, it is our duty to remain, if nothing else, civilized."
Alice gave him a wry smile, lifting one eyebrow. "It was you who threw the quilt."
"Ah, but it was you who provided the who for it to be thrown over."
The world around them was gradually beginning to brighten, the lush, surreal shapes and colors of the landscape emerging from the fog and the sky slowly opening up into a rich, watery bleeding of intense lavender and fuchsia. Despite the stiff chill still lingering in the humid air, Alice drew back her hood and inhaled deeply. The coarse, earthy smell of damp grass and budding forest was everywhere. As they crossed the yard together, Alice's gaze fell on the tea tables, and her smile abruptly fell.
"Hatter," she said, looking wistfully back at the soaked tablecloths, spoiled plates, and cracked cups overflowing with rainwater, "I am sorry your party was ruined. I should have gotten here sooner."
He waved her away without looking at her, his eyes fixed determinedly on his footsteps. "Tish tosh. Rain can't ruin teatime any more than wax could ruin a waistcoat."
"But wax could very easily ruin a---"
"That's beside the point. The point is, one must never begin an undertaking with bad tastes in ones' mouth. What's done doesn't matter now…all that matters is what needs to be undone---namely, that bloody prophecy. Defying it is going to require all of the courage and ingenuity you possess….and didn't I tell you that apologizing is bad for the teeth?"
Alice opened her mouth to argue, but thought better of it and simply smiled, turning her eyes down to the uneven path as they rounded the corner where the trees began crowding densely on either side of the road. They walked together for a moment without speaking, the cheerful twitters of birds and whinnies of rocking-horseflies who had hid from the storm in the undergrowth steadily returning. After a few minutes, Alice narrowed her eyes thoughtfully and looked up at the Hatter, walking quietly beside her.
"Hatter…what can you tell me about the Oraculum?" she asked. "As important as it seems to everyone in Underland…I've just realized I know almost nothing about it. Where did it come from? How long…I mean…just how far back does the calendar go?"
The Hatter frowned at his feet, knitting his brow in thought as they walked side by side.
"The trouble with those questions," he said after a moment, his voice low and introspective, "…is that they want answering."
Alice gave him a funny look. "Please, no riddles. Can't you just tell me---"
"I'm not sure if anyone can," he cut in, giving her a remorseful tilt of his eyes. "The Oraculum isn't like a picture book that shows you the same drawings every morning before lessons. It's forever a-changing and a-churning, turning up this and then burying that. No one knows how many days forward or back that it counts, for it is never the same number for long."
Alice bit her lip thoughtfully. "But isn't there any record of when it was made? Or before it was made? Certainly Underland must have some sort of….of history books, mustn't it?"
The Hatter looked up at her with a puzzled expression. "History books?"
"Yes, you know….dates and letters, kings, and wars, and whatnot. An account of things that happened in the past."
"The Oraculum is the account of what's happened in the past."
"But what good is an historical record if it's always changing?"
"Well, what good is learning history if it can't be changed?" the Hatter countered, still clearly confused by the notion. Alice sighed, looking back down at the ground and trying to think.
Alright….Underland doesn't keep written records of history. Shouldn't really surprise me, I suppose. But then….how does one go about learning anything?
She tried another approach. "What's the earliest prophecy the Oraculum has ever made? I mean…the earliest day ever shown on the calendar. What is it?"
The Hatter thought for a moment, lifting his eyes contemplatively to the sky and nearly tripping over an upraised tree root in his absence of attention. Alice seized him by the shoulders to steady his balance, and he snapped his fingers, turning to her with a flash in his eyes.
"I remember. It was called the Lomescious Day. It came about…" he pulled the pocket watch from his breast and checked the time. "….four hundred and three years ago. This Monday, in fact."
"Lomescious," Alice repeated, turning the strange syllables over on her tongue. "What happened on the Lomescious Day?"
He opened his mouth, then stopped, looking down and thinking again. "I believe….if I recall correctly…I believe the Oraculum explained that the Lomescious Day was the day that a decree was made for a large hole in the king's garden to be filled in."
Alice stopped walking and stared at him, blinking once. He walked another step, then noticed her and looked back curiously. "What?"
She blinked a second time. "A hole? A hole in the king's garden? That's the first prediction the Oraculum ever made?"
"The first that we know about," the Hatter corrected. "And it wasn't visible on the scroll for very long, either, if memory serves. In fact, I believe it only appeared for about seven minutes or so, almost a decade ago---"
"But…a hole to be filled in? What sort of silly….I mean, I thought the Oraculum only made…well…important prophesies?"
"Who says holes aren't important?" the Hatter retorted. "That hole might have been in the middle of the King's croquet grounds. Imagine the inconvenience."
Alice sighed with frustration, moving forward again down the muddy forest road. Without warning, her foot suddenly slipped on the bank of a slimy pothole, and she caught herself from falling just in time. Inclining his head kindly, the Hatter extended his arm to her, and she took it with an appreciative smile as they continued down the path. The sun was now peeping in clear, yellow rays through the breaks in the heavy cloud cover, but the atmosphere remained dim and purple, the pale, misty haze of the recent storm still clinging close to the ground. Alice shook her head slowly as they walked, lost in thought.
"I don't understand it," she mused aloud, holding tight to the Hatter's arm as they skirted round another puddle. "Things don't just appear out of nowhere. The Oraculum had to come from someplace….someone had to have made it." There was a moment of silence, and she looked anxiously up at the Hatter. "Didn't they?" she pressed.
"No one knows from where or whom the Oraculum came," he answered grimly. "…and what's more, no one has ever bothered to wonder. It has always been in Underland, since before anyone living can remember. It is as simple as that."
Alice blew an exasperated breath between her lips. "But it's not as simple as that, don't you see? If I'm going to break the Oraculum's prophesy about me for good, I've simply got to know more about it."
The Hatter frowned, quirking one corner of his mouth. "Perhaps," he said, a faint note of hope in his voice. "…the White Queen can answer these questions better than I. After all, the Oraculum has always been entrusted to the hands of royalty. If anyone can point us in the right direction, it will be MiraNAAGH!"
Alice gasped sharply and jumped as the Hatter let out a loud yelp of surprise. Seemingly out of nowhere, a bright, crimson projectile came hurtling out of the sky like a shooting star, headed straight for Tarrant's face. He ducked a split second before it struck him right between the eyes, and the little red meteor instead flew crashing into the top of his hat, knocking it clean from his head. Shaken, the Hatter and Alice looked down in astonishment at whatdiscovered to be a small, living creature, lying stunned and supine on the ground. An instant after the shape and color of the animal registered in her mind, Alice let out a sharp cry and dropped to her knees in the dirt, gingerly extending her hands to it. As soon as she had realized the creature had wings, she had recognized him at once.
"Cardinal!" she gasped, helping to right the poor little bird to his feet and brushing the dust from his back. He sputtered and twitched, clearly having been badly jolted by the impact with the hat, his bright feathers all ruffled and his head jerking wildly in every direction as if searching frightfully for something. Alice tenderly scooped the Cardinal up in her palms and rose to her feet, holding him between she and Tarrant.
"Family of yours?" the Hatter asked curiously.
At last regaining his bearings, the bird shook himself once more and looked up, giving a great start when his black little eyes reached Alice's face.
"Sir Alice! You…you're alive, you're alright, you're…..you're enormous!"
"I was so worried about you!" Alice replied. "I was terribly afraid that you'd been killed by the Jubjub. Oh, I am happy to see that you aren't hurt!"
"Pardon me," the Hatter lifted one finger timidly, his brow knitting with apprehension. "…but….did you say Jubjub?"
"The JUBJUB!" the Cardinal screeched suddenly, as if remembering something terrible at the mention of the word. Alice and the Hatter both winced at the bird's ear splitting cry. "The Jubjub, the Jubjub!!"
"Shhh," Alice urged, stroking the back of his downy head with her fingers and trying to calm him. "It's alright, Cardinal, the Jubjub is gone. You're safe now."
"No, no, you don't understand!" he wailed, his wings flapping wildly in her palms. "It's here, it's here, we must get away!!"
Alice narrowed her eyes and glanced up at the empty sky, then back down at the hysterical bird.
"There's nothing there," she insisted.
"But there is, there is!" he moaned. "I've been chased by that wretched beast for more than a day….it just keeps circling and circling, coming back and back again! I've not had a moment's peace since it attacked us and you fell!"
"Since what?" the Hatter cried incredulously, his eyes bugging.
"But it's gone now," Alice crooned gently. "Listen to me, Cardinal, the sky is all clear. You see? Nothing there. Down here, we're perfectly---"
"DUCK!" the Hatter shouted at the top of his voice.
"Ooof!"
The next thing Alice knew, all the wind was rushing from her lungs as she was knocked to the ground, flopping flat on her stomach with the Hatter's weight falling on top of her, her hands cupping closed around the Cardinal and her arms reaching forward just in time to save him from being crushed beneath her. Her heart hammering wildly with shock, she twisted her neck around and looked up just as an enormous shadow swooped down over them, a pair of flashing yellow talons raking the air so closely that she felt the sharp gust of wind from its passing rush across her face, blowing the ends of her hair. The Jubjub bird let out a blood-curdling screech of anger at having missed its target, its tremendous wings flapping and struggling in the narrow confines of the forested road. It grazed the ends of tree branches with its wingtips as it soared back into the sky, showering them with broken twigs. Inside her hands, the Cardinal was squawking and fluttering spastically.
The Hatter had climbed off of her and hoisted her to her feet before she had time to gasp.
"Into the trees!" he cried, practically lifting her off the ground as he pulled her behind him. They dove into the dense brush just off the side of the road, burrowing deep beneath the low lying branches until they were almost flat against the ground, panting for breath. His eyes moving constantly back and forth, his face aglow with a combination of fear and determination, the Hatter peered up through the thicket, scanning the sky. His arms were draped protectively over Alice's head, holding her down beneath him. She was still reeling with the shock of what had just happened, her whole body shaking so that she was scarcely able to keep her hands clasped around the Cardinal. After a few minutes of unbearable silence, she swallowed thickly and turned her eyes to Tarrant's face.
"Is it gone?" she whispered.
He hesitated, his gaze still fixed skyward. He bit his lips nervously.
"I don't see him."
Slowly, ever so slowly, the Hatter loosened his hold on her, rising up to just barely move the brush above them aside with his arm. He opened a gap large enough for his face to look throughand inched further up, searching high in every direction. Alice watched him, holding her breath.
After another long, excruciating moment,the Hatter let out a small sigh, the tension draining from his shoulders as he turned back to face her.
"I think it's gone," he said quietly. "I think---"
All at once, like a dark shadow blotting out the sun, Alice saw it behind him, the winged monster of claws and feathers plummeting down, straight toward them over the tree line. Her eyes grew wide, and for a split second everything seemed to stop and hang suspended in time.
"HATTER!" she screamed.
"TTTSSSSSHHHHIIIIIEERRRAAAWWK!"
It was as if an elephant had fallen out of the sky on top of them. The sound of snapping twigs and cracking branches exploded all around them, and the Hatter let out a sharp cry as he threw himself back over Alice, covering her with his torso just as the Jubjub descended.
"HATTER!"
His face was inches from hers as the whole of the thicket above them seemed to collapse, compacting and pressing down on them from every side, the weight of the Jubjub flattening the brush. She saw the Hatter's grimace, his eyes squeezing shut as the enormous, gleaming talons raked forward, the tips of the Jubjub's claws digging through the branches as far as they could reach. Down, down, closer and closer they fought….then, when they had pushed in as far as they could, for one instant, everything was still. Alice stared into the Hatter's face, her pulse throbbing slowly in the back of her throat. For one instant, she was completely terrified. Not of the Jubjub…not of the razor-like points driving steadily towards them….but of that look, that look on the Hatter's face, the terrible cringe that told her something had pierced him from behind. Then, all of a sudden there was an unbearable, stabbing pain in her right ankle, as if the sharp end of a red hot poker were being driven slowly through the skin. She turned her head aside and clenched her jaw in pain, screaming through her teeth.
Then…...a horrific, animalistic shriek rent the air as the Jubjub violently fought to extricate its talons from the brush, beating its wings frantically to pull itself back from the thicket. The Hatter collapsed further forward and Alice's face moved over his shoulder, her lips parted and her eyes wide, the breath caught deep in her chest. She watched as the Jubjub seemed to hover for a few seconds, thrashing in midair just above the road, half a dozen or more sharp-ended sticks driven into its underbelly and the leathery skin of its talons, flecks of dark liquid trickling down its legs and flying in every direction as it shook. It let out another shrill, furious cry, and at last ascended above the trees, flapping its monstrous wings until it had vanished from sight. For an instant longer, Alice lay still, watching it go. Then, as her mind slowly slipped back into reality, she shook herself and strained her eyes to look at the side of Tarrant's head, his orange hair filling her face and his head hung over her shoulder.
"Hatter?" she whispered. He didn't answer.
An hysterical fist of panic seizing her, she frantically struggled to roll him off of her, the broken branches pressing in on them from all sides. She opened her hands and the Cardinal burst out, jabbering incoherently to itself as it flitted away and disappeared into the woods. Groaning with effort, Alice at last managed to turn the Hatter onto his back and squirm out from under him. With every move she made, fresh bursts of searing pain erupted from her ankle, so intense and direct they nearly left her breathless, but she refused to stop moving. Gasping with fear and adrenaline, she hooked her hands beneath the Hatter's arms and, with tremendous difficultly, crawled backwards onto the road and finally pulled him free of the brush and out into the open air, the heels of his boots dragging two neat lines through the mud.
Filthy all over, and half-slipping on the wet road, Alice shakily wiped her face and pulled the strings of hair from her eyes, stumbling round and limping off her wounded foot to kneel at the Hatter's side. As she dropped down, she gave a small cry of surprise and relief when she saw that his eyes were open and he was blinking slowly, his face startlingly calm as he looked around.
"Hatter! Thank goodness, thank goodness…"
Gingerly, wincing slightly, he lifted himself up on his elbows and slowly rose to sit upright, his shoulders hunching forward. Alice eagerly braced him with her arms, using the heel of her hand to wipe some of the mud from his cheek. He bent his knees out to the sides, staring sightlessly down at the ground between his legs as if lost in a daze.
"Are you alright?" Alice pleaded, searching his face for signs of pain. "Are you hurt? Are you---"
She looked down, and her voice stopped in her throat when she saw dark, burgundy stains on the backs of his hands. Fear seizing her, she leaned him further forward, supporting him with her hands, and looked at his back. A small scream slipped from her mouth, and she stifled it with her hand, reeling. The back of his coat was black, soaked through with blood, the fabric shredded in several places. She gasped for breath, but couldn't find any. Panic flooded instantly through her, paralyzing her…..when suddenly, she heard his voice, calm and even, and she whirled back tolook at his face.
"It's alright," he was saying softly, looking down at his own hands and rubbing the burgundy blood between his fingers, his eyes narrowed with an almost quizzical fascination. "It…isn't mine. It's the Jubjub's."
"The Jubjub's?" Alice repeated, her voice still shaking. "Are you sure? It doesn't hurt anywhere?" She searched his back again, gently pulling bits of the torn clothing aside withher fingers and scrutinizing every inch. There were a few shallow cuts where lines of bright crimson trickled over the paper white skin….but he was right. The great splashes of blood staining his coat were too dark to be human, and his small wounds weren't nearly severe enough to have bled so much. Almost crying out loud with relieved joy, she leaned back to look him in the face.
"Why did you do that?" she demanded, shaking him slightly, her immense relief punctuated by a sudden flush of anger. "It nearly killed you!"
But theHatter wasn't listening. His eyes had abruptly turned a blazing orange, and he was staring intently down at something with an almost incredulous glare. She followed his gaze, and saw that he was looking at her ankle. Her eyes widened in surprise when she saw the true extent of her own injury…what looked like a long, smooth thorn had been driven in almost two inches below the skin, the end of the enormous splinter sticking straight out.
"You're hurt," the Hatter said, all traces of his dazed confusion evaporating instantly, his voice hardening and rumbling. Before Alice could protest, he had jumped to his knees and forced her to sit down, extending her leg out in front of her.
"It's fine, don't fuss!" she begged, wincing with pain even as she said it. "You're the one who was almost---"
"Hold still," the Hatter commanded, squeezing one hand tight around her ankle just above the puncture, and gripping the thorn firmly with the other. "…and count to three."
"But Hatter, it's you who---"
He silenced her with a sudden fierce, yet almost pleading look, his fiery orange eyes softening just a bit, and she realized at once, from the visible play of emotions just beneath the surface of his face, how difficult the task at hand was going to be for him.
"Please," he said softly, his eyes penetrating into hers. "…to three. But backwards. And start with two."
Pressing her lips together, Alice nodded. Thinking briefly, she squeezed her eyes shut.
"Two…one…three."
On the last count, the Hatter clenched his jaw and wrenched the thorn from her ankle in one swift, upward twist. Alice grit her teeth against the pain, but couldn't help drawing in one small, whimpering gasp. The Hatter quickly reached out one arm and took hold of his hat---which she'd just noticed was still lying in the road beside them---placed it on his head, and tore off the long train of crepe ribbon that hung from the back of it, wrapping it tightly, but gingerly around her rapidly swelling ankle.
"Alice," he said gently, still shaken, but with the faintest note of brightness returning to his voice, "Is it possible for you to stand?"
"Of course," she answered immediately, accepting his outstretched hands and letting him help her carefully to her feet. The instant she put the smallest weight down on her right leg, however, stabs of piercing hot pain blazed in her ankle, crippling her, and forward she fell. The Hatter caught her, quickly lifting her right arm over his shoulders and supporting her like a crutch.
"It'll be alright," Alice insisted stubbornly, clenching her teeth against the radiating ache. "It just needs a moment, and it will be fine…"
"You can't walk," the Hatter said quietly.
"Of course I can, it's only a little---"
"Please," he interrupted her, his tone somehow gentle and immovably firm at the same time. "You know I love talking nonsense more than anyone, but now isn't the time. We must get back to the palace, before the Jubjub returns."
Alice looked at him reproachfully, but she knew that, of course, he was right.
"But how will we---?"
"Hold on," he said bluntly, and before she knew what he was doing he had wrapped one arm around her back and pulled her feet out from under her with the other, cradling beneath her knees and struggling for just an instant, then clumsily hoisted her up high against his chest, so high he began to fall backwards. Alice yelped in surprise, her arms instinctively clutching about his neck, and both of them uttering small sounds of consternation as they teetered haphazardly for a moment before the Hatter found his balance. Alice stared at the side of his face, dumbfounded.
"No. No. You can't mean to carry me all the way to the palace," she murmured disbelievingly. "We've miles to go, and you've been hurt yourself!"
He simply ignored her, pointedly avoiding her gaze and staring down at the road in front them as he took a few careful steps forward, firmly planting his feet between lifting them again, navigating around holes and tree roots. She groaned exasperatedly, but was helpless in his arms. If she tried to wriggle down, she'd only cause both of them to fall, and she was forced to admit that she had no hope of walking on her own. Still….
"This is ridiculous," she muttered, narrowing her eyes angrily at his mildly shaking footsteps. It was clear that he was having a difficult time of carrying her, yet he refused to stop. "You're going to make yourself---"
"I have a splendid idea," he interrupted, his face suddenly lit with a small smile, his eyes still fixed down at the ground. He hoisted her higher, his arms tightening around her, and she hugged his neck for dear life. She sighed, curiositywinning over worry.
"What kind of idea?" she asked grudgingly.
"Let's play a game. A question and answers game. It will help to pass the time."
She sighed again, leaning her head on his shoulder. "Alright. How do you play?"
"It couldn't be simpler. I ask you a question, and you answer it. Then you can ask me a question, and I answer."
Alice raised an eyebrow, but almost smiled at the unfittingly cheerful tone of his voice. "Very well. You go first."
"What…." he began grandly, pausing to take a long step over a puddle, losing a bit of his hold on her, then hoisting her back up again, her feet bouncing over his arm. "….is the sound that a dandelion makes?"
She blinked, then rolled her eyes, the hinted smile appearing in full. Of course, riddles. His favorite. She thought for a moment, the crown of her head absently falling to fit just beneath his chin. She thought she heard him suddenly give a slow, thick swallow, but she wasn't certain.
"The sound a dandelion makes…." she thought aloud. "Oh, of course! It roars."
"Correct," the Hatter replied, his voice cracking for some reason. He cleared his throat, again tightening and repositioning his hold around her as she began to slip. She held tighter to his neck, hoping to make it easier for him. "Your turn," he prompted.
"Hmmm…any question I want?"
"Any question that has an answer."
"Alright then…..since you're so fond of riddles, answer me this. What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years?"
The Hatter surprised her with a short burst of snorting laughter. "I could answer that with my tongue sewn to my trouser seams. The letter M, my dear."
Alice tried to glare, but giggled once instead. "I suppose I ought to have known. Your turn, then."
"What stands on one leg, with its heart in its head?"
Alice chewed her lip for a moment, looking down ahead of them at the muddy road as they plodded steadily along. Her eyes lit up, and she pulled her head back to look at him.
"A cabbage!" she cried triumphantly. He only smiled, turning his eyes to look at her. "My turn. What holds water, yet is full of holes?"
"A sponge," he answered immediately. "What is black when it goes into water, and red when it comes out?"
Alice pondered for a long, quiet moment, but could think of nothing.
"A lobster," the Hatter smirked.
Alice grinned in spite of herself, racking her brain frantically for other riddles she knew. "Oh! I've got a hard one….'I go with a carriage, I come with a carriage, I am of no use to a carriage, but a carriage cannot go without me. What am I?'"
"Noise," the Hatter replied, without missing a step. Eager to stump him, Alice forewent the rules of the game and quickly began firing off any riddle she could think of.
"What belongs to you, but is used more often by others?"
"Your name."
"The more of them you take, the more you leave behind. What are they?"
"Footsteps."
"What goes round and round the tree, but never inside of it?"
"Bark."
"He who has it doesn't tell it, he who takes it doesn't know it, and he who knows it doesn't want it. What is it?"
"A false coin."
Alice shook her head at him in amazement, laughing. "It isn't any fun asking you riddles. You know them all."
The Hatter simply smiled, carefully watching his footsteps as he carried her along. As they drew gradually nearer to the palace, the road was growing smoother and scattered with cobblestones, so that he could walk with her at a swifter pace.
"I'm sorry to have disappointed you," he remarked, hoisting her high again, jostling her a bit more sharply on purpose. She giggled and pinched his ear. "But…" he continued, his grin suddenly straightening a bit, "…you having taken the last five turns, I believe I am overdue for one."
She playfully schooled her features into a serious gaze, and nodded. "But of course, how rude of me! It's only fair."
"And we must be fair. My question, then, good Sir Alice…."
He paused…she smiled expectantly at the side of his face….and then, all at once, his glee and silliness was entirely gone, replaced by small, troubled frown and inquisitive eyes, a pale kind of distress radiating out from him. Alice's grin vanished.
"….is why you didn't tell me that you were attacked by the Jubjub bird."
Alice's jaw dropped slightly in surprise. She stuttered blankly for a moment, but he kept his eyes fixed on the ground.
"Hatter, I….I forgot, is all."
He didn't look up, but she thought that she felt his arms tighten suddenly around her. "Lying is against the rules, you know," he said softly, his voice suddenly low and almost croaking, "…in case I forgot to mention."
"I'm not lying," she insisted, truly confused. "Yes, the Jubjub attacked us as the Cardinal was carrying me to the palace….I was still very small, then….but I wasn't hurt when I fell, I landed on a mushroom. I…I just forgot about it, I suppose. Why? Why does it matter?"
He didn't answer her, but merely continued to stare at the ground with his strange, hurt expression. She watched him, growing more puzzled and concerned with each second of silence. Without realizing it, she slowly lowered her head to rest once more on his shoulder. The Hatter seemed to stiffen for an instant as she did….he drew in a deep breath, then slowly let it out again, and lifted her higher against his chest.
"You see, Alice…" he began slowly, his eyes narrowed as if thinking deeply about the words before he said them. "…the Jubjub bird, despite its viciousness, is not truly an evil creature. Without a master to keep it chained and caged, to bottle up its natural ferocity until it is ready to rip to pieces the first living thing it sees, the Jubjub is no different, no more ill-tempered, than any other toothsome creature. Since the Frabjous Day, since the slaying of the Jabberwocky and the banishment of the Red Queen, the Jubjub bird has been living free and unfettered in the wilds of Underland, just as any other beast would…snatching up only what it needs to survive, only when it must eat. People have learned to beware its territory, and it doesn't attack without reason."
Alice listened to him, seeds of unrest began stirring slowly inside of her, and without knowing what she was doing she was inching by degrees closer and closer against the Hatter's heart, until her head was tucked beneath his chin and she could almost hear the beats of the throbbing muscle beside her ear. She could no longer see the Hatter's expression, but she felt as his hands held her more and more tightly.
"What are you saying?" she asked quietly under her breath.
He lowered his face slightly, his chin resting deep in her hair. She leaned gratefully into the warmth, a sudden chill of uncertainty stealing over her.
"Something isn't right," he answered, his voice grave. "The Jubjub is attacking you, specifically."
Alice bit his lip, her fingers playing nervously with the Hatter's collar at the back of his neck. "But why?" she asked.
The Hatter shook his head. "I don't know."
Then, all of a sudden, his footsteps stopped, and he stood perfectly still. Alice felt her heart rocket into her mouth and her face flush brightly as, all at once, it seemed to dawn on her how close she had been to him all this time. She hadn't fully realized it as they were walking, so concerned was she with him hurting himself…but now, as they stood there together with her head over his heart, her arms around his neck, the warmth of his body flush against hers, flowing into her, his hands holding her closer and closer….she found herself quite suddenly breathless.
There was suddenly a low, soft rumble beside her ear, and she realized the Hatter was speaking. She couldn't see the expression on his face, but she felt as if she could feel the emotion bleeding down to her, like a tangible sensation.
"Alice. I have one more question."
She didn't respond. Her mouth moved soundlessly. She was paralyzed with warmth, hanging there as helpless as a child in his arms.
"If I were to ask you, someday….someday…" he whispered in her ear, so quietly she was almost unsure she heard him at all. "….would you tell me everything? Everything that has happened to you, since the day we parted?"
Alice couldn't speak. She turn and buried her face in the front his shirt, and there, like a shy little girl too afraid to look up and speak…she simply nodded.
Yes.
For a moment, everything seemed to fall silent, even the rustle of leaves and the chirping of the birds.
And then, as if nothing had happened, the Hatter continued walking forward, cradling her gently.
The long, penetrating silence followed them the rest of the way home. The only sounds were Tarrant's footsteps, growing sharper and sharper with each tap as the ground beneath them gradually became smoother and gave way to cobblestones. For what felt like hours, they walked on without speaking another word. Alice clung tight to the Hatter's neck, her eyes glazing and her ankle aching with each movement, her consciousness adrift in straying thoughts. Finally, after an eternity of soundless floating, she opened her eyes again, and the forest around them had disappeared, replaced with rolling green yard and white cherry tree orchards. She blinked in surprise, lifting her head to look around. How had they already reached the White Castle? Had she fallen asleep? How long had they been walking?
Suddenly, the strong, cradling arms beneath her gave a great jolt, the world swaying and buckling for one brief instant, and Alice felt herself slipping.
"Hatter!" she gasped, and all at once his grasp tightened again, but his head fell forward over her clutching arms and he dropped to his knees on the stone walkway leading toward the palace, the two of them crumpling down to the ground together.
"Tarrant! What's wrong?" she begged, leaning to look into his face. His eyes were closed, his orange brow furrowed as if he were trying to shut out a physical ache.
"Nothing, not a thing in the world," he murmured, breathing heavily, fighting to regain his wind.
"Yes there is, you're exhausted!" Alice accused, half angrily and half ridden with guilt. She knew, she should never have let him…what was he thinking? Half-injured himself, and carrying her all that way over such a terrible road…. "Put me down this instant, before you---"
"Nothing to worry about," he insisted, opening his eyes and staring blearily forward and he tried to rise to one trembling knee. "Just need a….hot cup of tea, and I'll be right as….as rivets…."
"Tarrant! Alice!"
Alice looked up and gave a great, groaning sigh of relief when she saw the White Queen hurrying towards them from the nearby courtyard, with a handful of her court ladies and attendants trailing curiously behind her. As she drew near, Mirana's dark mouth dropped in a startled expression, her eyes widening. She covered her mouth with her hand and bent to her knees beside them.
"Oh, my….word! What….what in the world has happened to you??"
"Tea party…." the Hatter muttered, still trying in vain to rise back to his feet with Alice in his arms. "….delayed by the rain…"
"I can't stand. Please, help…take me from him before he collapses!"
Four attendants in white robes immediately rushed forward, lifting Alice clear into the air and holding her cradled between them, the other two quickly moving to either side of the Hatter and helping him to his feet. Once he was standing erect, he seemed to give a great shiver that rippled through his entire body, and he blinked profusely, rubbing his face with one hand.
"Help them inside, at once!" Mirana commanded, then turned to another group of servants behind her. "And you, please hurry in and wake the Court Physician. He should be nearing the end of his midday nap. Have him prepare bandages, tonics, and two sick beds, immediately!"
As the attendants scampered off to obey her orders, the White Queen hurried alongside Alice and the Hatter as they were ushered swiftly past the courtyard and through the palace doors. Alice never moved her eyes from the Hatter's face…he looked like a sleepwalker, half-stumbling, half-carried under each arm by the two servants, his head hanging low and small, strange sounds of gibberish issuing from his lips. Alice pursed her mouth worriedly, watching him as the party passed through the castle entry room and into a corridor.
"What's wrong with him?" she asked desperately, turning to Mirana. "I thought he was only weak with exhaustion, but he looks as if he's becoming ill."
"Don't worry, my dear, we'll get the two of you in to the doctor immediately," she answered. "Don't strain yourself now with talking, you can tell us all that's happened in just a moment."
Alice opened her mouth to argue, but thought better of it, and consented to letting herself be carried through the halls, the Hatter near at her side. She trained her eyes on his blank, weary face, the surges of worry and guilt rising higher and higher inside of her.
I never even thanked him, she realized, a sudden pang of unbearable guilt piercing her more deeply than the thorn that had wounded her, as they rounded a corner and were carried into a bright, white room with tall windows, where rows of small beds were lined neatly along the walls.
I never even thanked him for saving my life.
A/N; Yeeeeaaahh….I feel like this chapter was sort of a mish mash, especially the ending. Hope it didn't seem too disjointed or irregular. I'll try to get the next one up as soon as possible, and in the meantime, your feedback is important to me...let me know what you think! You're all doing a wonderful job keeping me motivated with reviews, so don't stop now!