Disclaimer: I do not own any of the recognizable characters. No copyright infringement intended.

Author's Note: Okay, only one of you called me out on the fact that I had said I would post chapter 19 last Thursday. I had completely forgotten thinking I had decided that both stories would post once a week now. I've been so busy with family parties, etc for the holiday that I totally blanked.
When I haven't been busy with that, I've had my face buried in The Black Dagger Brotherhood series, which is excellent by the way. Anyway, postfail was my bad…so now here's the update you were supposed to get today. Sorry for the confusion!

Thanks as always to AgoodWITCH for her beta work. I'll warn you now…this one is an emotional rollercoaster ride. Now on with the chapter….I have no update yet for next week's chapter, so check the blog occasionally to see if it posts…or add me to twitter and I will tweet when it posts. Link to my twitter account can be found on my blog.

Evil Brown Envelopes

Time was passing quickly…far too quickly. Every day Cherie, as we now liked to call her, was doing something new. It only took us a few weeks before we found ourselves clamoring to find one of those 8mm cameras to record bits and pieces of her growth and progress for Edward to see when he got home.

It actually ended up working out very well for us when a friend of Harry's had another friend who was an out of work filmographer desperate for money for him and his family. They were on the verge of losing their home when we were introduced. He sold us his camera and all twelve rolls of 8mm film he had, at which point we promised to sell the camera back to him when things got better and he once again found work in his field of expertise.

We couldn't have gotten the camera at a more perfect time. Carlisle was simply playing with it when he ended up by some course of luck catching Cherie's first smile. There were many more that followed, most of which were caught either in still life or in slightly grainy moving film.

Every week I did my best to catch Edward up on the latest Cherie news, with pictures to go along whenever possible. My breath always caught in my chest when a week would go by without my regular letter from Edward. I was always terrified that at any moment the Western Union delivery man would come calling, and I just couldn't handle getting that telegram. The terror was nearly paralyzing.

Having Sue and Esme as readymade babysitters, made getting into the office a couple times a week much easier. On the rare occasions where my presence was needed longer than two or more hours, they would simply bring Cherie up to the office for me to feed before taking her back home again. It was a system that worked quite well, and everyone at the office absolutely adored our precious little girl.

Along with Edward's hair and what were now most obviously Edward's beautiful green eyes, she also inherited the Cullen charm. I swear she was like a beauty queen in a parade as she would smile her most beautiful smile, the corner of her little eyes crinkling as she would giggle slightly in response to anyone who would look her way. We were definitely going to have our hands full when she reached her teenage years. With charm like that, as well as the Cullen looks, my poor Edward would have to sleep by the front door with a shotgun to keep them all away.

Not that I liked looking forward to the future like that and wishing her life away, but sometimes the thoughts just seemed to creep in. When they did, it always made my stomach clench uncomfortably. Would Edward actually make it home to be there to play century when the teenage boys came knocking? He didn't have to tell me that things were worse than ever, I could sense it in his letter and feel it in my dreams. There was absolutely no denying that he was looking death in the face every day and all I could do was hope against hope that he came out the victor.

I got lost in my morbid thoughts again as I put on my business suit, which was still a bit snug in the hips even though I had lost pretty much all of the weight. Esme and Sue both assured me that it was all a part of motherhood and that anyone with narrow hips like me would experience a bit of widening after giving birth. I understood, but it didn't mean I had to like it. I sighed as I zipped up the skirt before tucking in my white silk shirt, turning slowly to look in the mirror with a sigh. I couldn't help but worry that Edward might not like the changes in my body once he got home. We had only been together a few times, but if he held onto his memories of them as tightly as I did, he might be very disappointed when he came home.

With another sigh, I shrugged into the matching jacket, grateful that it was just long enough to cover the fact that the material was slightly strained at the widest portion of my hips. I slid into my heels and walked into the living room where Sue sat playing with a contented Cherie.

"Okay ladies, Marcus promised that the meeting wouldn't go long, and he intends to take care of all of the major business early. If she needs me before I'm back, don't hesitate to call and have one of the secretaries deliver the message to me and I'll come right home or you can bring her to me…whichever works best."

Sue smiled, taking Cherie's hand and making her wave. "Okay, Mommy. We'll be fine. Grammy Esme is supposed to arrive any minute. We love you! Have a good meeting."

I smiled, crossing the room to kiss my beautiful smiling daughter's cheek before walking to the door where Sam was waiting to escort me while Jacob stayed behind with Sue and Cherie.

As I walked through the building, everyone smiled and greeted me. I loved being able to be back on a regular basis without everyone trying to shove me right back out the door. It was hard being away from Cherie, but knowing she was safe with not one, but usually two women who adored her as though she were their own, I knew she was well taken care of, if not completely spoiled. I was also comforted in knowing that they wouldn't hesitate to bring her to me if she needed me and that took the last of my guilt away. Even when I was away, I could still provide for her whatever she needed.

I was running a bit more behind than usual as I stepped into the smoky board room, sincerely wishing I could get away with making it a no smoking meeting, but I had already done enough churning of the status quo to know better than to try to take away their tobacco. It was a disgusting habit, and I sincerely believed there was no way it could be healthy, but as far as the greater public was concerned, there was nothing wrong with it. I had even seen an ad the other day speaking of the health benefits of cigarettes. I sincerely doubted the validity of that claim, but most of the rest of the men in this room had jumped on the bandwagon immediately.

I settled into my seat at the far end of the table opposite Marcus who smiled at me when I locked eyes with him. I opened my briefcase and shifted through my papers, smiling when I found a new letter from Edward on top. Sue must have snuck it into my case before I left that morning. I pushed it aside with a loving caress, wishing I could open it now, but knowing that I needed to save it for when I was alone or else I might tear up in front of the men I least wanted to show weakness in front of.

The meeting went smoothly and was over even more quickly than I anticipated. Marcus smiled as he offered to escort me to the elevators when it was over. Things were going better than we had even hoped, stocks were up, the government had doubled their orders of our stronger steel, and the research department was already making spectacular progress on improving on what we had already been able to deliver. Finally, after nine months, Cullen Steel was back to the level it had been when Edward left. Marcus and I both felt proud that we were taking care of it for him.

I stepped out of the building smiling up at the warm spring day. The sun was shining and the birds had taken residence in the park across the street again, singing gaily to the beautiful weather. It was April once again, and today was the first anniversary of the day we met at the USO dance. It amazed me when I thought about how much had happened in one short year. It was full of more dramatic ups and downs than the rest of my life put together, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

After savoring the day for a few moments, I finally slid into the car, greeting Sam happily before he pulled away from the curb and into the dense traffic. As I rode home in the car, Sam not speaking a word as he navigated the streets, I couldn't help but tug Edward's letter from my case and open the back, tugging out the pages carefully.

My dearest Bella,

Things have been a bit calmer here the past few days. After the whole accident in Switzerland, the US Air forces have been cut back a bit inland.

I sighed, feeling bad for Edward. He never did, or I guess actually never could tell me if he was involved with the accidental bombing of Schaffhausen, but I knew if my some bad stroke of luck he was, he was probably quite upset over it.

After having been there, being out over the water again feels like a vacation…almost.

Thank you so much for the newest pictures of our little Cherie. She's absolutely beautiful, just like her mother. Have you noticed that she has your smile? I could look at that smile all day because it is just one more reminder that she's this perfect little blending of you and me.

I find it humorous that you think that her skill at charming the masses comes from my side of the family, my dear. It is you that bewitched me from the first moment I saw you. You greatly underestimate your powers, my beautiful Bella. I cannot wait for the day when I finally get to go home and hold both of my beautiful perfect girls in my arms. I love you both so much.

I am sorry that this letter is so brief, but I have to go and will not have more time to write before the mail plane comes, so for now this is adieu, with a promise for something more next I write.

Love Always,

Edward

By the time I finished reading the letter, we were already back at the house. I carefully folded it, sliding it back within the envelope so I could tuck it into my overflowing shoebox full of letters from Edward, all placed in sequential order. I carefully placed it back in the briefcase and closed it before allowing Sam to help me exit the car.

We walked in to find the house eerily quiet. I tiptoed into the kitchen to find it empty, as was the rest of the first floor, although Jake was still stretched out on the couch with a book, so I knew that they hadn't left. I carefully crept up the stairs and stood outside the nursery to listen as Esme and Sue sang in harmony over Cherie's crib. I smiled as they sang You Are My Sunshine with such genuine affection it caused my eyes to tear.

As they were about to start the second verse Esme looked up with a warm smile. "Now there's the lady we've been waiting on. She's been looking for you, Mama. She has been fighting sleep for the past half an hour, but not crying. I think she wants some milk and cuddle time before she'll give up the good fight."

I smiled brightly, stepping to the side of the crib and looking down with a smile as Cherie's head turned to look in my direction, the smile on her face shining all the way up into her eyes, like always. I loved how babies were incapable of giving anything less than a genuine smile. Every time her toothless grin overtook her features, her whole body would tense in joyful reactions. It was a wonderful thing to behold.

Immediately her hands and feet began flailing as if she were trying to climb up into my arms, making me laugh. I leaned in, cooing to her quietly as I lifted her to my chest where she cuddled up happily. I chuckled, moving to the rocking chair as Esme and Sue positioned it and assisted me in removing my suit jacket before leaving me alone with my hungry daughter.

As she nursed happily, I sang quietly, stopping occasionally to talk to her. We often carried on long one-sided conversations during these times when I would tell her all about her Daddy and how much he loved her. I would tell her how her name came to be as I mumbled to her in the tiny bit of French I knew, calling her Mon petite Cherie, as I threw in a few phrases I knew here and there.

Once she finished eating, and was burped, I lifted her to my chest where she curled up and nearly instantly went limp as her breath evened out in the deep sleep of an exhausted infant. As always, I battled with the desire to keep her in my arms as she slept, but I also didn't want to spoil her to it either, so I reluctantly laid her back down before going back to the living room to visit with the other adults.

I sat up late that night, writing a letter to Edward telling him about my day and how beautiful it was and my realization that it was the anniversary of when we met. I also reminded him that if the mail was on schedule, he would most likely receive the letter on or very near our first anniversary, as I wished him a happy one and sent him my love. I woke early the next morning to mail it, hoping it would make it in time.

****

The next two weeks went by quickly, but I was anxious because once again, we had not gotten a letter from him on schedule. I couldn't help but be worried every time I didn't receive my regular correspondence. If something went wrong, how long would it take before someone would let me know? Every afternoon, I would anxiously await the postman, while also anxiously watching for the Western Union man to pass my front door so I could breathe again.

Before I knew it, our anniversary had arrived, and I still had no word from Edward. I found myself pacing the length of the house all morning, waiting for the mailman to deliver our mail. Poor Cherie was just as stressed by everything as I was, as she soaked up my anxiety like a sponge. I hated upsetting her, but I couldn't let go of the idea that something was wrong. It just had to be for Edward not to send his usual letter this week. It was five days late.

The rational side of me recognized that he had a job to do and that it kept him too busy sometimes to write. Not only that, there had been many occasions where the mail plane had been delayed due to bad weather or other inhibiting factors, but I just couldn't let it go. I wouldn't feel at ease until I had another letter in my hand as proof that he was okay. I know my information was always two weeks behind, but to not have the paper meant that two weeks ago he could have been gone and I wouldn't have known.

I watched anxiously for the mailman, practically attacking him when he walked up the concrete steps to our mail slot. I apologized after yanking the letters out of his hand before quickly rushing into the house, flipping through the envelopes in desperation. When there was once again nothing from him, I tossed the mail on the floor with a frustrated scream, which in turn made Cherie cry, making me feel like a horrible mother.

With tears in my eyes, I ran to her side, lifting her into my arms and caressing her short bronze tinted hair that was only slightly darker than her father's. I cooed through my tears as I apologized to her for upsetting her. I settled in to nurse her shortly after before putting her down after she fell asleep mid feeding.

I grumbled as I returned to the first floor, resuming my pacing. Esme and Sue finally got me to sit down long enough to eat some soup and bread before I was up pacing once more. I had been up and down the hallways about fifty times in the hour between when I ate and when the knock came at the door. I had been so busy obsessing neurotically that I hadn't even paid attention to anything else going on around me.

Brady, who was on duty today, came into the doorway from the living room looking worried as I opened the door, wondering if someone dangerous could be on the other side. I pictured James, back to complete the job, or another hired gun come to take me out, but what stood on the other side of the door was something I hadn't been prepared for at all.

Smiling at me with his brown uniform and oddly shaped hat with the Western Union logo on the front was a teenage boy not more than sixteen at the very most.

"Telegram for you, ma'am."

I reached out for the envelope as I felt my knees turn to liquid. I collapsed in the doorway, sobs escaping my mouth with was now covered with my hands. Brady was instantly at my side, taking the brown envelope from my hand as Sue and Esme rushed in, both crying as well.

Brady thanked the boy who looked confused before picking me up and carrying me to the couch as I screamed in agony while staring wide eyed at the little brown envelope. It looked so innocuous, and yet I just KNEW what was inside. I couldn't bear to open it as I shook on the couch.

Esme took the envelope from Brady with shaky hands. She looked at the front warily before her eyebrows furrowed.

"Bella, didn't your friend from work say that when bereavement notices go out they come from the government offices in Washington D.C.?"

I nodded numbly as I wrapped my arms around my legs and rocked slowly, trying to find some way to lessen the pain.

"Well, then why does this say London?"

I froze, looking up at her in surprise. She looked back at me with equal surprise as I rushed to her side and yanked open the flap. I pulled out to see the telegram words typed upon the small square. Below a bunch of little codes I didn't understand and the words London and Chicago was a message…

Mrs. Isabella M Cullen

Happy Anniversary, my Love. Sorry you did not receive a letter this week. Was in transit to England and didn't catch the mail plane at either location. Am doing well but not allowed to call since no business related issues. I love you more than words can say and I dream of holding you in my arms for our next anniversary. Love Always, Edward.

I collapsed on the floor for a second time in tears, but this time it was in relief as I smiled at his words.

"It's from Edward. He's in England. He cabled me to wish me a Happy Anniversary. He's fine."

My voice cracked as I said the last part, laying down on the floor in relieved exhaustion. I had just gone through hell over the course of the last few minutes. Part of me wanted to throttle him for giving me that scare. Perhaps he had not realized that Western Union now delivered the notices, but how could he when I have mentioned that fear. Maybe he thought the joy of his words would supersede the panic. In a way he was right, but as my heart continued to pound in my chest, my hand still shaking from the panic induced adrenaline running through my veins, I couldn't help but be even more terrified that the next time one of those boys came up to my porch, the news would not be as pleasant.

I carried that telegram with me the rest of the night, reading it over and over to remind myself that he was okay. Not only that, I didn't know he was okay two weeks ago. I knew he was okay just a few HOURS ago. Once that realization finally set in, the panic seemed almost worth the knowledge…Almost.

Once everyone was tucked into bed that night, I carefully pulled out my shoebox, tucking the telegram in with the rest of the letters and sliding the box back in its home under the bed. I climbed under the covers and said a quick prayer of thanks that Edward was alive and well before falling into a deep, dreamless sleep.