Disclaimer: Twilight is not my shit. This crazy idea, from all the crazy happenings online, is my shit. Thought it would be like a 'who dunit'...but in reverse....ermmmm, that's 'dunit who'...confused yet? Alright then, read on.

As usual...my uberawesomefab Beta is the great Danell.

And please feel free to leave feedback, or messages, or something. Like it, hate it, could care less one way or another? I wanna hear it all!

Chapter Five

"Get comfortable, I'll be right back," Edward asserted, pointing toward the humongous couch in the sitting room of his hotel suite.

"Nice kitchen," I ignored him and looked around. "Odd for a hotel to have a full size kitchen, isn't it?"

"Well, I think it's the kind of place that mainly a person like me rents," he called from the bedroom before returning and pulling the door shut, fresh pack of smokes in hand. "I stay for a lot longer than an average hotel guest at one time, and I usually pick the same place to stay every time I'm in town...so a kitchen just makes it easier...I mean, not that I cook or anything..."

He was rambling. Why was HE nervous? Surely this wasn't that unusual for him. Picking up fan-girls must be par for the course by this time. I am not a fan-girl! I sighed.

"What?" he looked at me meaningfully. I had moseyed over to the wet-bar and had my hands spread out on the top. I liked the way the cool marble felt beneath my hands. He came up behind me and sensing danger, I turned around to meet his eyes. I hoped I stood a better chance of keeping my resolve if I was looking at him. His eyes were thick with...whatever they were thick with in the doctor's lounge earlier tonight. My breath caught in my chest and I wondered if I were turning blue.

"What's the matter? I really thought you would be delighted, Bella" he whispered my name, moving in closer, his voice husky.

"Delighted?!" I couldn't believe the audacity of this joker. I moved away and gave him my best don't-you-dare-move-a-muscle look. He really was used to girls just following him anywhere, for anything.

"I don't know exactly what you normally bring random girls up here for, but that is not why I'm here," I said angrily.

"Then why did you use that tone? If you really don't know what I bring them up here for?" he chuckled. Why was everything so funny to him?

"Okay, I do know what you bring them up here for then," I rambled, putting a hand up to stop him when he looked about to speak.

"Either way," I shrugged, "I'm not up here for that."

"Well, I didn't bring you up here for that," Edward nodded at me as if that were hanging on the outside of my sweater. I flushed.

"Oh," I felt like an idiot. Just because he'd kissed me earlier I assumed he wanted to sleep with me...or not sleep...to....I prayed for the fifteenth time since entering his hotel room that I could just sink into the floor and disappear. My eyes detected patterns in the carpet and I studied them meticulously. I could feel him studying me as keenly.

"Please," his indignant tone made me look up briefly, "I'm not saying I wouldn't love to do that. But I realize—" my scowling look of utter disbelief stopped him.

"Why are you looking at me that way?" when I met his eyes I could see he really didn't know. He genuinely looked at me as if I was an eighth wonder of the world. An anomaly. I felt the familiar heat returning to my face and neck and wished for the millionth time in my existence that I were black.

"Oh," he said softly. His voice full of recognition.

"I get it." He nodded as though a light bulb had just gone off in his brain and he knew my every thought.

"You get what?" I looked up and then away. The decor was worthy of at least a glance.

"You don't see why someone like me would want someone like you."

I looked up shocked. I couldn't believe he just said that. It was exactly what I was thinking, but to hear it put into words...and by him no less. I felt my stomach literally fall out of my insides and plummet to the ground. He didn't seem to notice and I looked down, surprised not to see blood and guts everywhere. You are really losing it, you know.

"Alright," he waved it aside. "We'll discuss that later. Let's get the baggage over with first."

He motioned to the couch and went to sit down himself, waiting of course, until I did. I slowly made my way over, trying to figure out where my stomach went, if not on the floor, and sat almost as far away from where he stood as I could. Of course, he moved toward me and sat down a few inches away. I looked at my hands a few minutes while he looked at me. Why doesn't he say something?

"You are going to look at me sometime tonight, aren't you?" he teased, but only half kidding. I looked up into his eyes, which were a piercing blue. My green ones felt like second skimmings and froze from his gaze.

"Okay, so explain yourself then," I tried to hold my position. Tried to be strong. But damn it was hard to think with him staring at me so intently.

"Where do you want me to begin?"

"How about with where you shut down your Facebook account and didn't tell anyone you were leaving!" as soon as I spoke them, I knew the words were the most ridiculous I had ever uttered. I sounded a little more frantic than I meant to. The old feelings of frustration and inadequacy were coming back now.

"I didn't shut it down; I was shut down," Edward nodded, "by Facebook. As a fake account," he snorted slightly at this.

"Okay," I nodded for him to continue.

"And I sent you a friend request as soon as I realized it had happened. I wasn't on there all the time so it took me a week or two to notice," he explained matter-of-factly.

"And when you realized, then what?"

"Well, like I said, I sent you a friend request, under a different name. I put a note on it. But you never accepted it." His eyes showed he wondered why.

"I didn't know it was you. I remember getting a random request, and it was during that time when the girls and I were getting all these random adds. I just ignored them all." I looked down at my hands. I suddenly felt really stupid for being aggravated with him.

"Look, I understand that! I wish I'd been smart. I wish I'd written down email addresses or something. And I can't say I searched the globe looking for you, of course. It was an incredibly busy time in my life and I got caught up in...work." He looked sheepish.

"Well, everyone was hurt by you leaving. It's silly, but we all really believed you were genuine." I realized what I was saying, "I mean, I guess you were genuine. I... don't know what I'm trying to say."

"Well, I assumed you just didn't want to be my friend anymore, or... online friend anymore... and I just tried to let it go. But I kept thinking of all the great conversations we had. It was during a time when I couldn't really talk about normal things with other people. Hell, I still can't with most people. You and I always talked about normal things. You were the only person who never asked me crap about the films."

"So..." I was struggling now for things to ask. I didn't know what the purpose here was anymore. "What about last week?"

"What about last week?" he shook his head, confused, edging closer to me.

"Why did you pretend..."

"Well, I really did have this thing I was supposed to make. An appetizer or I could bring afters or something and I thought it would be better to make it myself than have it catered. Because I never cook, so it would be fun...and terrifically awful probably. A mate was having a get together and we were all supposed to bring something. So, my initial reason for going to the market was true...."

I looked at him skeptically. It wasn't that I thought he was actually lying. This just seemed too strange to be true. Truth is stranger than fiction. Shut up.

"And when I saw you, well, despite the banana deal," he laughed. "I recognized you right away. And I remembered you were a nurse, and that you had said you would probably wind up back in Los Angeles."

"Okay," I sighed. I guess there was a good explanation for everything. It didn't make it any less freaky. Or plausible. No one would believe this yarn. Not that I ever intended to tell anyone.

I stood to leave. I had found out what I came for. I needed to get as far away from him and the publicity as I could. He stood as well.

"Why are you leaving?" he looked surprised.

"I came here to talk. We talked."

"Can I pour you a drink?" Edward motioned to the wet-bar. I shook my head.

"Can't you just stay? We can... catch up? There's so much more to talk about. Now that the past is settled. I meant it when I said I wanted..." he ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

"What? What do you want?" I was scared of the answer but I couldn't help but ask. What could someone like him possibly want with someone like you? It was unbelievable enough that we'd actually been Facebook friends, but to start up a real life friendship with someone... famous... who you met on Facebook? Utterly unbelievable.

"I fancy you," he reached out and took my wrist in his hand, his long fingers wrapping around it and leaving room. His eyelids fluttered slightly at the same moment I felt that zing of electricity from his touch. Right. He gets zapped every time he touches you. Delusional. He tightened his grip and pulled my arm up and toward him, pulling my body with it until we were chest to chest, with my arm in between.

That crazy feeling where my stomach falls out happened again and I tried to pull away, noticing that hazy look his eyes were taking on. I felt my breathing labor and heard his getting ragged as his breath warmed the side of my face where I had turned away.

"I'm not that girl anymore," I whispered.

"What girl?" he was practically gasping as he continued his trail down my neck, not making real contact. Just breathing.

"You smell amazing," his voice was husky, full of gravel.

"That girl," I rambled, " I mean, I never was one of them to the extent that some of them are. Of course, I was infatuated to a certain degree, but not the degree that many of them were... Are—" I could hear the crazy coming out of my thoughts. What the hell was I trying to say?

"If you're referring to the screaming crazy girls, I know you weren't." He chuckled, "Aren't. I mean, if there was any doubt, you made that evident at the market when you literally ran from me, and then again, today, love."

My body stiffened. Why had he said that? It was so schtickish. Schmultz. What every fan-girl wanted to hear and what I'm sure led many of them into the bedroom. I had almost believed this was different. You're stupid.

"I have to go, Edward," I said coldly. His head snapped up and he looked at me, but he didn't release his hold on my wrist.

"Why?" he could tell something had just changed, but he didn't know what.

"I am not some star-stuck slut you bring up to your hotel room for a bang," I spat angrily, glad at the shock I saw it produced in his eyes. He released my arm and stepped back.

"That's right," he looked angry, "Because I bring a girl up here a night. I don't even ask their names." His tone was increasingly hostile. But I wasn't afraid. He didn't strike me as the type to get violent physically.

"Well, if the shoe fits," I muttered, looking around for my purse. Angry is good, if I could make him angry enough, perhaps he'd ask me to leave. I turned toward the couch, thinking perhaps I'd laid my bag there, when he grabbed both of my arms and jerked me to him roughly.

"Stop it," he growled, "I'm not like that, and I think you know it. You knew me better than that once, Bella" he whispered angrily against my skin.

"That was four years ago! I don't know you anymore," I countered, struggling, albeit weakly.

"Then get to know me," he moaned, silencing me with his mouth.

For a moment, I fought. I tried to pull back, but he had his hand behind my head. And then, almost instantly, I forgot what I was fighting about. Damn, the electricity had returned and I felt my entire body light up again. To be able to have a clear thought, I needed to not have him touching me, but to have him not touch me; I needed to have a clear thought. What???

I groaned inwardly and gave in. Our mouths moved rapidly, hungrily. There was little tenderness in his kiss at this moment. He was still angry; trying to convince me he wasn't a man-whore. With a make-out session worthy of panty-dropping lust. I didn't have the thought process to present my case anymore. I kissed him back eagerly, moving my hands to his hair, allowing him to draw me backwards to the couch. We fell onto it in a heap of flailing limbs and gasping breaths. It was as big as a bed. I kept thinking of all the articles I'd read about him. Damn my ability to read. What was true and what wasn't? I should've found a way to ask the bellman how many girls had been up here. What was this? Don't kid yourself. This is a one-night-stand. Crap, had I taken my pill this morning? Does he have condoms? You're ruining this.

He maneuvered us until I was beneath him. Quickly, he worked my arms out of my hoodie and removed my scarf. His mouth never leaving mine. Clever bastard. I was putty. He reached back and pulled the loose ponytail out of my hair, letting it splay about me, running his hands through the dark tendrils and then massaging his fingers into my scalp. I moaned at the sensations his body sent through mine. I was gone. My hands twisted in his hair and then ran down his back. Simultaneously we grasped each other's shirts and began to pull upward. No small feat when you're lying on top of each other and lip-locked. Whenever he saw I wasn't breathing he would move his mouth to my chin, my jaw, my neck.

The second our respective shirts cleared our heads, his mouth returned to mine with a fury. The electric current never wavered. His tongue slid into my mouth forcefully and then slowed down, his kisses becoming more passionate. Tender. His hands had started to move slowly, gently. Wait wait wait.

"Hold on," I gasped. He had moved down my neck now and was trailing soft kisses along my upper chest again. Moving downward. His warm breath between my breasts, which heaved in response.

"Mmmmm," he moaned in reply, he teeth raked across my skin and then pulled at the fabric of my bra.

"No, seriously, wait," I begged. I knew if he kept going, I wouldn't stop him. Why was I stopping him? How many people got to be in this position?

"Okay, what?" his head snapped up and I could see the anger had subsided. Full-blown lust was in his eyes now. Not for you. He's toying with you.

"I'm serious," I pushed lightly and he supported himself on his elbows, looking down at me with hooded lids.

"Okay, I'm listening," he didn't look annoyed, but he was an actor after all.

"I can't do this. Not like this." I apologized.

"You wanna move to the bedroom?" Edward looked confused.

"Yes. I mean, no!" I shook my head. So many thoughts were racing through my brain that I didn't know where to start.

"I mean, I can't sleep with you. I can't do this," I waved between us. "I know it's crazy. Everyone would tell me it's crazy. I know you're offering... whatever..." I let my head fall flat and spoke to the ceiling. "I know you're not asking me out, asking me for a relationship... not that I want a relationship with you! FUCK, I am sounding more and more crazy."

I ran my hands through my hair and felt the tears threaten once more. Why was I so fucked up? Here was this gorgeous and fairly nice man, with an accent to die for, who happened to be possibly the most famous bachelor on the planet; practically begging me for it, twice in one day and all I could think of was... The Virgin Mary??? Where the hell did that come from?

I shot up quickly, practically toppling him over, jumping off the couch, before I realized I was sans sweater and my breasts were bouncing practically out of my bra. He, of course, noticed, and he licked his lips absently as his eyes turned dark again.

I resisted the strong urge to cross myself and wondered what the hell I was supposed to say now. How do you get out of a situation like this? What do you say?

Oh, just by the way, I've never actually gone all the way with someone because I never had a real boyfriend during school and all... because I could never stand anyone to touch me...and well, honestly, I never felt attracted to anyone in the least... which ran on forever...and then when I did get a boyfriend, which oddly became a fiance, he never did fuck me because there wasn't even enough sexual energy there to support a candle flicker much less a flame...and I still felt like vomiting on him most of the time if we even got remotely frisky...and then I found out he was screwing everything that moved on two legs...so I trust men even less than I did before which is pretty amazing considering I was raised being told what a little slut I was and that no man worth anything would want me because I was too much like my mother. Phew! Okay, so bye. No?

I just stared at him. He was looking up at me as I had this mental exchange like I had suddenly been possessed by demons. I felt the tears rushing forth this time and there was no holding them back. His eyes widened and I know he was thinking what a complete and total nut job I was, but I was exhausted and couldn't help it now. He's probably going to call security.

"Please, dear God, please tell me I'm not making you cry," his voice barely audible, he hung his head and ground his hands downward into the couch, arching his shoulders. His magnificent shoulders, his magnificent abs... You are such a fucking moron.

"Please hand me—" Edward jumped up and shoved my sweater at me before I could finish, holding it up against my torso, covering my exposed flesh. I couldn't tell if it was because he was repulsed or just felt really badly for me. If I were him, I was thinking I would vomit right now.

Instead, he embraced me. Not in a sexual, groping way. He just wrapped his arms around me, letting me melt into his naked chest and sob. For a moment, I'm not sure how long, I just stood there, lifeless. My arms hung at my sides. I hadn't slept in almost twenty-four hours and I think I could fall asleep standing there if given the chance.

Then, as his embrace tightened, I wrapped my arms around his waist, snaking them upward, my face pressed against his chest, my body shaking as I tried to stop crying. My sweater pressed between us wasn't much of a barrier as it shifted downward while he enveloped me more completely, shushing me and gently placing kisses on my hair. When he swept me up in his arms, I didn't protest. He carried me from the room, continuing to coo at me and tell me it would be alright.

Like hell it would. I am the most fucked up person on the planet. Bet you're glad you picked me up tonight. Here you just wanted to get laid and you choose crazy to bust a move on.

He strode slowly over to his bed, which was the size of a small bedroom in and of itself, and pulled back the covers, strewing decorative pillows, before lying me down and immediately crawling in over me. He wrapped me up in the covers, pulling me into his abdomen, kissing my forehead and letting out a deep breath as my 'exercise in humility' continued.

Somewhere in the midst of the tears that flowed freely from my eyes, racing down my cheeks and covering his and my bare chests...in the middle of his hoarse whispers to relax and sleep, that everything would be okay tomorrow...in the moment where reality and fiction merged and my labored breathing slowed, I felt that fuzzy feeling in my head get heavier and-- I think I fell a little bit in love with him. Oh shit. And then the room went black.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

Anonymous Reviews are accepted too! I don't care if you have an account or not, I just want suggestions, thoughts, fortunes...random thoughts that have nothing to do with this story...

I have several more chapters already written. But am not above changing things around a bit if it would improve the story! See you soon! xx