I'm Updating I'm updating! But you'll probably flame me for the end of the Chapter!! Don't cheat and scroll down, either, it'll ruin it! Also, sorry it's so short,I'm kind of short on time, and I'm going to go work on Chapter Nine!
Author's Note
Thank you,
Bellacullen798
Kaykay123
Avari-at-heart
Jordlovestwilightlots
Morgangorman
Dail-of-the-air
Mrs Robyn Cullen,
And thank you to everyone else who has responded so fast to my story, that I have not been able to accurately put everyone's name down!
Chapter Eight: Yellow
Prologue
I came along, I wrote a song for you. And all the things you do.—Coldplay
Edward's Point of View
As I sat in my room, staring angrily at the wall I had just ruined with my chair, I began to think of a song that I had written for Bella a few years ago. Damn it, Edward, stop thinking about her! I groaned, trying, and failing, to get her out of my mind. In fact, the whole reason Esme was now crying in her room was because I had gotten violent; I had been trying to stop thinking about her, about tonight, about everything, but I just couldn't stop. My mind had been, and still was, running at a thousand miles an hour, giving me quite the headache.
And although I had tried so hard to ignore it, the one thing that was a constant in my head, was this screaming. This horrible, horrible sound, this, this thought, and all it would yell, over and over, was her name.
You know how people say there's a little voice in the back of your head, sometimes? Or an angel and a devil, your conscience, if you will. Yeah, well I had a voice in the back of my head, and it wasn't little. Everyone and everything reminded me of her; a certain song, a word, or even a certain color. And each one killed me more and more.
Which brings me back to where I started.
What happened to the wall? To me? Well, I ended up snapping.
Flashback: (A/N: unnecessary, I know, but it helped elaborate for you)
"Get out of my head!" I growled, and threw my desk chair across the room.
It hit the wall, and tore a small hole at contact. The second I realized what I had done, I regretted my actions. Esme came running up the stairs, yelling, "Edward?! Edward! Are you okay!" I sank to my knees, my head in my hands, as she saw what I had done to her wall. I heard her gasp, break into tears, and run straight back down.
End of Flashback
I sighed, getting up. I needed to go apologize to my mother. She didn't deserve that. She was already stressed as it is, and I had to go and make it worse. Typical me.
I just make everything worse, don't I? I thought to myself bitterly.
As I neared Carlisle and Esme's room, I could hear her sobs. Jasper was leaning against the wall outside, holding his precious football, and Carlisle was right outside the door, asking what was wrong. I assumed he had just gotten home, because he was still holding his briefcase in his hands, and he had his coat thrown over his arm. I tapped him on the shoulder, and he gave me a disapproving look, before stepping out of the way so I could enter the room.
"Talk. Outside. Five minutes." He whispered. I gulped, but nodded. He was never mad like this. I shut the door, and walked over to the foot of their bed.
"Mom?" I asked softly. She peeked up at me from her hands, and looked down again. "Mom, I'm really sorry." I tried again. She just shook her head at me like before.
"Not now, Edward, I just can't deal with this right now. Please, just, just leave."
I realized that I was going to have to be assertive, so I walked around to where she was sitting, and crouched down in front of her, pulling her hands from her face, and hugging her. "I'm so sorry, I really am. It's just, I can't get her out of my head, and I tried, I tried so so hard." By now, I was crying too, and making absolutely no sense. What had started as an apology ended up with her holding me in a comforting embrace.
"Honey, slow down, you're making no sense." She said gently, rubbing my back. I got up and sat down next to her on the bed, taking shaky, uneven breaths as I tried to explain. If she didn't understand, she made no sign of it.
"I just. Don't. Know. What. To do." I got out between sobs. She pulled me into a hug again, and rocked me back and forth, saying the things she used to say to sooth me when I would go to her for comfort frequently. Now I felt guilty, realizing how little I participated in the family anymore. "I'm sorry, mom." I whispered, for the hundredth time.
Bella's Point of View
You're a charmer by nature,
I should've known from the start.
But it's way too late, I can't go back now,
I can't restart.
It's all over now; you and me, me and you.
So now I'm free to start asking myself the questions;
And where are you?
This wasn't good. I was writing poems again. Which must mean I'm depressed, right? I needed to talk to someone. Now. And though I tried to think of anyone else, I couldn't.
"Hey, Damien, um, could you come over again, like, now?" I asked when he picked up. It had taken him one ring. "S-Sure," he said, obviously confused. "I'm sorry, you don't have to—" but he interrupted me. "No! No. Um, I want to come over." I sighed, as he hung up, feeling a little bit lighter inside.
Edward's Point of View
I walked out to Carlisle, expecting the worst. And that's what I got.
"What were you thinking? Hurting your mother like that?! Don't you understand? It's not about the furniture or the wall, it's about the fact that Edward hasn't been Edward for five years! And now you're becoming violent? Why? Is it because of Bella?" I nodded. Suddenly, my worn out Converse were very interesting.
"Edward, are you even paying attention? I said to get over it already. I mean, at first, yeah, it was sad and all, for all of us, but Jasper used to be Bella's best friend, too, and look at him, he's gotten over it!" I sighed. "I'm sorry, dad, I just can't help it." I sounded like I had rehearsed my words a thousand times over. Which, technically is, in some sense, true because I had spoken those words over and over and over again ever since that horrible, horrible date in time. For the first two years, I wished that Wednesdays had never even existed, so that I never would have left Bella behind me in the first place. Then, in middle school, I guess logic sort of kicked in, and I gave up on that.
"Edward, just go inside, please, I just can't deal with you right now."
That hurt. I've been screamed at, been the cause of many tears and much pain, but never, not once, have I been told that I can't be dealt with. That I'm too much to deal with. I walked, numb, into my room, and left behind the progress I had just seemed to be making with my family.
Bella's Point of View
"Hey, Damien, sorry to bring you all the way out here so late at night." I whispered as we walked silently away from my house and into the small forest behind it. Well, small, as in, only a tiny, little part of Forks. We sat down on a moss-covered rock, giving up on trying to find a dry one, and Damien looked at me, expectant.
"Look, I, I just want someone to talk to, is that alright?" I asked. He smiled comfortingly and laughed, putting an arm around me. "Yeah, Bella. That's all I want to do. I just want to know more about you. So yeah, it's fine. Shoot." I sighed, and launched into my sad, pathetic life story. By the end, I was crying in his arms. He really was perfect. The perfect guy. After knowing me for all of one day, if you could even call it that much time, he had so willingly been my, and though it sounds so cliché, shoulder to cry on. I think I'm falling in love. I sighed, thinking about it. "Damien, why do you even care?" I asked, trying my best to not sound harsh or sarcastic. I mean, I truly was curious. Why would this random, perfect guy care so much about someone like me? A nobody.
He lifted my chin, and whispered, inches from my lips, "Because I care about you."
And then, he kissed me.
Author's Note
Heh heh, um, please please please don't kill me! I'm writing the next chapter right now, and it doesn't look good for our extremely confused Bella. So please, please, I beg of you, please, don't hate me!!!! Review and flame me though! If you want! Also, thank you to all who reviewed!!! And alerted, and favorited. I am sorry I couldn't put in all your names, I will in the next chapter though. You are all awesome! I promise, Bella and Damien will end in tears!! Hmm, I think there's potential here for another team!! Review! Team Damien or Team Edward!! I, personally, am Team Edward all the way!!
Preview: Don't Stay by Linkin Park. Listen to this song!!! It is awesome!!!
Peace!
Norah