When Worlds Collide: Chapter Seven

The Final Showdown, Part 2

Well, here we are. Seven chapters, over thirteen thousand words, and all sorts of strange happenings. I'm glad I was able to make it to the end. Here it is. The final chapter. The culmination of all my efforts with this story. It's finally done, and I'm going to quit stalling now.

"All right, where are you?" Asked the Tiger General to himself. He was quite sure that Taily was on the third floor, and she most certainly had seen him go into the hospital. "Now where's an elevator?" He began looking around. "Room, room, room, room…where's the God damn elevator?" He turned around, and saw that he was standing right in front of it, just looking in the wrong direction. "Oh. Duh." He pressed the up button, and waited a few seconds. Nothing happened. He pressed it again. Nothing. "Come on!" He began pressing it frantically, waiting for it to come down. No matter how much he pressed it, precisely jack shit happened. He started yelling random German blasphemies, and finally pressed it one more time. Just a second later, the door opened. The general started to get mad, but he suppressed a violent aneurysm, and stepped inside. Yeah, hospital elevators suck. He pressed the third floor button, and waited to head up.

When the elevator doors opened, he immediately began yelling, "All right, where are you! Well? SHOW YOURSELF!"

Taily was just hiding in a random broom closet, trying her hardest to be quiet. With the general yelling at the top of his lungs, it was extremely difficult not to even whimper. Unfortunately for her, the general suddenly remembered that his robotic eyes had thermal visioning, and he activated them. He could immediately tell which room Taily was hiding in, but he decided to have a little fun with it first, because what's the point of being a villain if you can't have fun when you know you're going to win anyway.

In the goofiest game show announcer voice he could muster, the general yelled, "All right! It's time to play everybody's favorite game: Find! The! Girl! The rules are simple. You get to choose three doors, and if one of them has the girl hiding in it, you get to take over the world! Let's meet our latest contestant, The Tiger General!" He changed his voice to his normal one, and said, "Oh, hello, hello! I'm just so glad to be here today! I've been waiting weeks for this to happen!" He switched back to the cheesy announcer voice, and yelled, "Well, then, let's get started! Go ahead, pick a door!" The general walked over to one door, which was completely the wrong one. "Well, I guess I'll pick this one." He opened it, and said in his announcer voice, "Oh, sorry! But remember, you still get two guesses."

"Oh, well then. I guess I'll try that one." He pointed to a different door, which was still completely incorrect. He opened it, and said, "Oh, terribly sorry! You have one try left. Which door will it be?"

He walked over to the correct door, and said, "Well if I only have one try left, I guess I'll pick," He opened the door and screamed, "THIS ONE! Finally! You didn't think you'd be able to hide from me forever, did you?"

Taily screamed, quite loudly in fact. So loudly, it actually hurt the general's ears, and while he was stunned, she took the opportunity to run between his legs and escape.

"What? No! Get back here!" Taily ran to the elevator, but accidentally ran directly into the panel, since she was blinded in her left eye and had no depth perception. She hit the button anyway, though. This time, the elevator came up almost immediately. The general tried to run over to it, but the door suddenly closed on him, and the last thing he saw before it closed completely was Taily flipping him the bird. He began screaming German obscenities related to elevators at the top of his lungs.

About thirty seconds later, the elevator arrived in the main lobby of the hospital, and Taily stumbled out of it. She was still trying to walk normally without any depth perception. She was failing quite miserably at it, and accidentally pushed over a lamp. "Ow, ow, ow." She started clutching her eye, trying to slow down the blood flow, and carefully made her way to the front door. She pushed it outwards, and left the building. Several of the police officers that were outside had been shot, but one of them, Rufus, survived, and walked over to Taily. "Hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." She answered.

"What about your eye?" He was suddenly interrupted by the shattering of glass from a window above him, the window right next to the one the Tiger General destroyed. This time, the general actually jumped out of the window, and before Rufus could run out of the way, he found himself as a rather ugly splatter on the ground, crushed by the Tiger General's boots. Taily screamed in horror, but the general was ready this time, having stuffed tissues into his ears. He grabbed her throat, and yelled, "Silence! You are mine now, and there is nothing you can do to stop me." Ah, how tragically right he was. There was, in fact nothing Taily could do, since he began whistling, bringing her under his control. However, he failed to think about Splendid.

Minutes earlier…
 Splendid, or Chris, rather, was busy trying to make a loaf of bread again; hoping this time fate wouldn't screw him over. "Finally, I get to have this homemade bread!" Suddenly, his super hearing caught all sorts of chaos happening over at the hospital. "Oh, god damn it! Not this bullshit again!" He sighed, and removed his tie and glasses. He unconvincingly started saying, "Fear not, citizens. I'll save you. Fuck this." He flew out of his window, obnoxious trumpets blaring in the background. Flaky, looking at this from the ground, yelled, "Hi, Chris!" which caused him to stop dead in his tracks and turn back around. "Jesus, Flaky, could you at least pretend you don't know my secret identity? Please?"

"Oh, uh, sorry, uh…"

"Oh, forget it." With that, he flew off to save the day as only he can: fucking it up and saving it accidentally.

"You are mine now, and there is nothing you can do to stop me." He began whistling, bringing Taily under his control but stopped when he heard a certain, bellowing, ridiculously over-the-top voice. "Stop, evildoer, and I may show you mercy. Trying to fight me is the worst mistake you could possibly make."

"It is, is it? Well, I won't fight you then. Taily, get him!"

He dropped her to the ground, letting her run at the hero. However, Splendid whistled incredibly loudly. Like, incredibly loudly. We're talking at least a hundred and sixty decibels here. Combine this with the high-pitched nature of whistling, and you have a recipe for Taily's eardrums exploding violently. The general's technology even began to short circuit it was so loud. When Splendid stopped whistling, he saw Taily writhing in pain on the ground, her eardrums ruined, and he had also managed to break every glass thing in a very wide radius. "Oh, shit." He flew off at high speed, hoping nobody noticed his screwup.

The general was unable to do anything for quite some time, since he was at least three-quarters robot, and Splendid's nuclear whistling short-circuited pretty much everything. Eventually, he was able to get to his feet, but most of his functions still weren't working. Taily also got up, but since her eardrums exploded, she had no balance anymore. They started "fighting", but as you can guess from my sarcasm quotes, an onlooker could easily mistake it for "attempting to do a tango while simultaneously high on several varieties of illicit chemicals and paint, and thoroughly wasted on cheap vodka." The general tried to kick her, but his mechanisms failed, and he kicked himself in the face. Taily just had no idea what was going on, being half-blind and lacking depth perception and balance, and she started randomly flailing in the hopes she would hit something. That's when Flippy finally walked out. Since he had heard all sorts of violence and yelling outside, he didn't leave right away and in fact flipped out and killed several doctors in gruesome manners. He eventually snapped out of it, and that was when he left the hospital. When he came out, he immediately became very confused. It looked like Taily and the Tiger General were attempting to fight, but seemed extremely drunk. "Huh?" He wondered. He did not flip out, though, since the sight was so ridiculous his mind couldn't connect it to anything having to do with the war. He said, "Huh?" again, before slowly backing into the hospital. By this time, however, Taily's wounds were beginning to heal. See, when somebody dies, the hospital deals with it, but injuries just heal on their own accord. Anyway. She could see out of her left eye again, and she was slowly regaining her balance. The general, however, was still flailing about like a madman. Eventually, his technology worked itself out, and he gave chase.

Minutes later…

Taily had ended up running right towards the residential neighborhood, and when she realized the Tiger General was chasing after her, she ran into a random house. When she saw nobody was home, she headed to the kitchen to get weapons. The general got up to the door, and kicked it in, sending shards of wood everywhere. Taily screamed, and began searching faster. She came across a bottle of "Blazing Inferno Hellfire Sauce" and she got an idea. She pulled the cap off, and started pouring the entire bottle down her throat. The substance was so spicy, it actually kick started her fire breathing, and she began spitting out fire like a flame-thrower. The general didn't expect this, so he ran right into the flames, causing him severe burns. Taily quickly turned around, and began running. When the flames cleared, it quickly became obvious that most of the general's skin had been burned off, revealing the hard metal skeleton underneath, a la the Terminator. He began screaming in rage, and ran towards Taily, who had found a shed filled with fireworks, in preparation for the fourth of July. He jumped towards her, but she leaped out of the way, revealing that she had lit a very large firecracker. The general actually got impaled on the firecracker, and it took off. Eventually, it exploded, propelling the general towards his own base. While falling, he began screaming, "NO!" But stopped when he was impaled and killed instantly on his own flagpole.

Back at the house, the first firecracker taking off had lit all the other ones, and Taily just barely noticed it and leapt away. The resulting fireworks display would later be agreed upon as being one of the best they'd had in years.

EPILOGUE

For about a week, Taily had been going to see Toothy the therapist, trying to help her with her whistling problem. This was the last day, and Rufus was waiting outside for her. Eventually, she walked out of the door, while Toothy was waving goodbye at her.

"Hey, Taily." Rufus greeted her.

"Oh, hi, Rufus!"

"So, do you feel any better?"

"Actually, yeah, I feel a lot different."

"Well, let's try it out." He whistled, and Taily didn't do anything.

"Well?"

"No, I seriously think he fixed it." However, she saw a car passing by, and she had a sudden urge to jump in front of it, so she did. In a matter of seconds she became a rather disgusting splatter on the windshield. Rufus stood there for a moment, before yelling, "Toothy, you fucked it up!"

WHEW! Finally, I'm done. So yeah, now Taily's gimmick is that she tries to commit suicide when she hears whistling. I'd like to take this moment to give a few acknowledgements.

Thanks to Aubrey Ankrum, Rhode Montijo, and Kenn Navarro for creating Happy Tree Friends

Thanks to Satoshi Tajiri for creating Pokemon

Thanks to my mom for proofreading this nonsense

Thanks to everybody who read this nonsense

BIG Thanks to everybody who reviewed

And Thanks to me for having the patience to write this rubbish.

Anyway, I'll be doing that big series thing I was talking about soon. I'll have all the seasons as one story, and as promised, I'll remake those episodes I already wrote. I won't be remaking "Third times the harm", though. I just think that episode raises too many questions. Until next time, AwkwardVulpix, over and out!