A/N: A wild plot bunny appears. Kay shoots it down and drags it over to the fine establishment that is FanFiction. It's somewhat effective!
Disclaimer alert: Consider yourself disclaimed.
KEY: This is Sirius, This is Remus, and this is James
I think we should take a trip, Remus
Right now? Wouldn't Flitwick notice if we just walked out?
Not right now, you turd. But, you know. We could all go Maurauding in… Phuket, or something.
If we do take this trip, could we call it 'Marauding Phuket'?
Vulgar, spying wanker.
Vulgar? I'm impressed. Chocolate?
Hah. I'm fifteen years old. You don't need to reward like a Dog, Child, or similar.
Technically you're all of those things. Now do you want a chocolate or not?
Hmph. How am I 'technically' a child?
Well, in the eyes of both the Muggle and Wizarding governments, you are under the age of consent. Ergo, A CHILD.
But- I –LOGIC AUGHH!
JUST TAKE THE CHOCOLATE SIRIUS.
Fine
Good
Can I ask, Sirius, do you want to go to Phuket because it has a funny name or-
Oh, no. It's the funny name thing.
Can I point out it's pronounced 'Foo- ket' not 'Fuk- it'
You can
Shove off
What about Bangkok? I hear the Booby migration is glorious this time of year…
Stop high-fiving you two! You're drawing attention to yourselves. How old are you?
We've been over this. The governments think I'm a child, blah-dee-blah-dee-blah?
It rings a bell, Remus. You're like the teacher from the Muggle thingy… you know 'wah-wah-wah-wah-wah!' and whatnot.
Sadly, I know exactly what you're talking about. And I'm a little offended.
You're welcome!
Why do I even bother?
I really don't know, Remus. Why DO you bother?
Aw, great, Sirius. Now he's giving us the cold shoulder. Remus! I appreciate you!
Yelling at him through paper won't help. Plus, the class is over. TO LUNCH!
-Lunch
Reeeeeeeeemus!
I don't want to talk to you.
Remmmmyyyyyyyyyyy!
I. Do. Not. Wish. To. Converse.
Aw, don't be such a crotchety old crotch-jockey. You know you want to know what I heard about that Ravenclaw I know you like.
Wha-? I mean, I DON'T.
I have chocolate?
I won't be persua- wait, does it have raspberry filling?
And now I answer your question with a question: Do you want to talk to us again?
...
Don't grumble, there's filling and a Ravenclaw in it for you.
FINE
Hah! Knuckle touch, James.
Why?
SUCCESS, THAT'S WHY.
ALRIGHT!
YEAH.
YEAH!
YEAAHHHHHHHHH!
Why with the capitals? If you were talking out loud, my ears would be hurting.
Poor, sensitive Remmy
SUBJECT CHANGE. You said something about a certain Ravenclaw?
Did I?
You did.
Shut up James- NO. NO I DID NOT.
But you did! You said- Ohh. Clever ruse. But I'M not stupid. THERE IS NO RAVENCLAW
JAMES
What?
You, Sirius, are a lie. The Remus is not pleased.
The Remus?
Just go with it, James.
Right.
At least you're talking again? Eh heh heh heh heh…
…
DAMN IT SIRIUS. Now I have to go back to Honeyduke's.