Chapter 1: MY Glade
*** Dream***
I stare out the window, remembering how much my mother cares about me and how supportive she is of me. I remember Samantha Slane, and how mean she was to me, how she ruined my perfect life. I shake my head, no. This year is going to be different. I just know it. "HELLO!" startled, I look into his eyes... those deep, icy eyes that I've grown to understand, to trust, and to love. I realize that the emotions that hide in his eyes aren't just anger or lust, but also pain, fear, loneliness, but mostly a deep desire to be himself. I see that now.
**** End Dream****
"ISABELLA!" A loud knocking on my door and my name being screeched wakes me from with a start. I jump out of bed, like my ass is on fire.
"I'm up!" I yell back. My head spins. Cursing to myself, I fall back to my cozy bed and my head slowly stops spinning. Thank God.
My mother's voice calls up to me again, "Remember honey, today you're going to Diagon Alley with your friends to get you supplies for next year!" I think I hear a whimper and my mother moan, "my little girl is growing up so fast," but I could be mistaken. I roll my eyes; mom can be so bloody sentimental and emotional.
As I stare at the ceiling, my brain starts to turn on. Right, school, friends, dream, Draco. It was all coming back to me now. I sigh in confusion. That must be at least the tenth time I've had that dream in the last two weeks. What's going on? What's wrong with me? Why do I keep dreaming of that day? Why do I keep dreaming of Draco? Argg! Why do I keep calling him that? MALFOY, Malfoy, Malfoy, the jerk who almost raped me! And who would have if it weren't for Harry. I sigh. Harry, with those amazing green eyes, saved me. Ok, yeah, so what? Maybe I do have a little thing for him, but I would never act on it. He's one of my best friends, besides, Maggie's got a bloody big crush on him, and I couldn't do that to her. Nothing could ever happen between us.
"OK? Bella? Did you hear me? Are you up yet?" my mother yells up to me again. She does that a lot.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm up! I heard you. Diagon Alley, friends, supplies, school. Got it!" I yell back.
"Ok, just making sure!" she yells up to me one last time before leaving me to my thoughts.
Getting up, I pull on a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt, that won't show dirt. Walking over to my window, I pull it open, lean my head out the window, and take a deep breath of this beautiful day, trying to clear my head. Though I know it won't work; it just helps a little.
I push my window open all the way, and sit on the sill, with my feet hanging out. Looking down, I push my butt off the sill of my window of the second story of our white house in the country. I grab the branch of the big oak tree and swing to the ground. Did I mention I'm athletic?
I walk through the grass, still damp from the morning dew, which tickles my feet as I go over to Magic's stable.
"Hey Magic. Ready for our morning ride? I really need your help this morning. We've got to figure the Drac… Malfoy thing out. My head is spinning." I tell her as I brush her down and check her hooves. She whinnies at me, playfully pushes me around with her big head, and, I think, she even rolls her big brown eyes at me.
'Of course, Bella, when don't I try to help you figure out that tangled brain of yours? Are you in the mood to run today? Cause I know I am!' She thinks playfully as I climb on her bare back, of course.
As soon as my legs wrap around her and my fingers intertwine in her mane, we start to race through the meadows. I let myself relax into her gate, I close my eyes, and feel the wind blowing through my hair, washing away all the knots and worries I've been holding. As I settle in and become, well, human again, I begin showing her all my thoughts, worries, and questions from the last 24 hours. Finally I finish, and both our minds are silent, letting it all sink in.
'I think there's something you missed Bella.'
Confusion washes through my mind.
'Show my the image of Draco's eyes again.'
Still confused, I close my eyes and picture his face again, seeing it just as clearly as I had in my dream. She was right there was something else there I hadn't seen before, and even now that I'm able to see it, I still am unable to recognize it.
What is it? I ask her.
She doesn't answer me.
Tell me! Please!
She sighs. 'Bella, when are you going to learn that I don't tell you things. I point things out, and let you figure them out. Remember?'
Oh. Right. I knew that. I respond, a little ashamed.
'Look, if I were you, I'd just take your time and let your mind wonder with it. Don't try and force any thoughts, don't push away any thoughts, and don't deny anything. When your finished, then you can deny all you want. Just take a moment and let the truth be known to you. You know the answer, you just won't let yourself know it.'
It's my turn to sigh. Fine. How about we go to the lake so I can think.
'Good idea, too bad I already thought of that,' she thinks. If horses could smirk, she'd be smirking.
I look at our surroundings for the first time. (I just let Magic go, I trust her not to take me anywhere dangerous, and that she is able to find our way back.) Sure enough, we're in the magical glen, my magical glen. We found this place many years ago. The glen is surrounded by a deep thick forest that feels magical, and not just because, if you looked carefully long enough you might see a magical creature. The very air of this place seems magical. The glade itself seems even more magical to me. The long, flowing, green grass and the quiet stream flowing through it. In the middle of the glade, the stream forms a pool, deep enough to dive into. It's sandy bottom, and is perfect for swimming. Beside the pool, an old Hazel Treethat is perfect for sitting under. (Hazel trees are known for their magical properties.) As I lower myself to the ground, I begin to feel the place's magic seeping into me, refreshing me, and renewing me. I walk to the hazel tree and sit beneath it. There's a perfect nitch for my back that faces the sparkling water.
Once seated, I allow the grass and earth to be squished between my toes. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath of the pure, refreshing air and think.
This must be heaven, except it's missing something.
That thought confuses me for a moment, then I remember what Magic said, I take another deep breath and just let my mind wander.
Something was missing. Something, or someone, someone to share this place with, someone who will love me, care for me, be there for me.
That wouldn't be Draco.
Why not?
Because he's an arrogant, self-loving ferret who despises your very existence!
My mind goes back and forth with itself. His face flashes through my mind, an image of him sneering at me after he pushed me down. I feel a tear slowly wells up in my eye.
See? Can't you see, Isabella? He doesn't want you. You mean nothing to him. You need to find someone who cares about you, someone like Harry.
Except Harry is Maggie's, and even though I don't like Ron, he's Hermione's, when they ever get around to noticing it.
Draco. Think Draco, I remind myself. I sigh.
Why does he hate me?
He doesn't hate you.
How do you know? He certainly acts like it.
The image of him on the train flashes in my mind, the one from my dream. I look into his eyes, desperately hoping the image will stay clear, and it does. I "zoom" in closer, on his eyes. I feel his eye opening up to me as I watch. His eyes shows the pain, the loneliness, the strong desire to be set free from his bindings, and something else. I see it so clearly, but I can't identify it. As I try and push it, it seems to go away, so I relax, let it come to me. The emotion becomes stronger and stronger in his eyes, till I can't pretend I don't know what it is anymore. It's...
My thoughts are suddenly interrupted by a whiny. Magic would only interrupt me if there was something important. I slowly open my eyes from my trance, only to be thrown back into those eyes. The same grey eyes I was just looking into, only now they are much darker, much icier. I gasp at his closeness and anger in his eyes. Yes, there is only anger there.
****** Draco's POV *****
*** Dream ***
I'm saying goodbye to my parents on my first day of Hogwarts of my first year. My annoying mother is going on and on about how her little boy is growing up or whatever when my father finally interrupted her cries with a brief and distant goodbye...
Of course... He's not going to see his son in months, and he doesn't even care. How typical. He doesn't care about me, only that he has an heir to carry on the Malfoy name. Like he ever cared, doubtful that he ever will care. My negative thoughts would have continued, but then I see her.
'Wow. She's... beautiful.' Now you must understand, no girl has ever been "beautiful" to THE Draco Malfoy, girls are hot, shaggable, or ugly. The word sounded foreign even in my own mind. 'I have to meet her. She's different. She's not just a one-night-stand. Did I really just say that? WHAT THE WIZORD!'
I'm suddenly getting the life squished out of me by my mother.
"MOTHER! STOP IT! YOUREMBARRASSINGME!" I scold her. She reluctantly lets go of me. I see Crabbe and Goyle, my obligation friends, who also happened to be very stupid and good at intimidating people and who listen to everything I said. I snicker at the memories.
Ha... those looser. The only thing their good at is being bodyguards, which might come in handy… Not the point though. Why do I have to be friends with those oafs anyways? Stupid obligation friends! It wouldn't be so bad, except they except me to live up to the "Malfoy name," which means being a complete ass-hole, being the tough guy that's 'too-cool-for-school,' and being a total player. Why can't I decide who I want to be? Not that getting all the girls isn't nice… but that also means Pansy. I think to myself, and can't help but gag at the thought of Pansy.
"Mother, look, I'm going to miss you tons 'n all but I got to get on the train" I tell my mother who was STILL sniffling.
Merlin, what is wrong with that woman? It's not like we spend "quality time" together anyways. She's almost as bad as he is... never there... never involved... which is good I guess... but whatever...
"Bye honey! We'll be right here when you come home at Christmas! Have fun! Be good! We love you!" my mother shouts as I walk away and ignore her.
I quickly get on the train before the two oafs can see me, only to run into Blaize, my best mate, even if he still has the pressures of obligation friends.
After a brief hello, I tell Blaize to go ahead without me and find a compartment. After a look of questioning, and then "enlightenment" he leaves.
I return to my thoughts, as I slowly walk through the train, looking for her. What am I doing? What am I going to say to her? 'Hello, I'm Draco, want to be my girl?' No. That's stupid. This whole thing is stupid. Draco your such a git. Just go find your friends and forget all about the bitch. She's no bitch, and you know that. Yea, well, you know what I meant. I argue with myself, till a light catches my eye. I turn to see her dark, golden hair reflecting the light. I walk in. Guess we're taking this impromptu... a back part of my mind mummers. I ignore it.
I'm standing her compartment all cool, but she doesn't see me.
"Hey there. How you doing?" Nothing.
What's wrong with this girl? Then I realize that she has something in her ears. I walk over to her and kneel down right in front of her and say "Hello?" Still nothing. Grr.
"HELLO?" I say... a little too loudly. She jumps Shit! I didn't mean to scare her!
A little shaken, she replies, "Yes?" taking the things out of her ears
"What's your name?" She's starring into my eyes... she can see me... I just know she can see right into me, seeing everything, seeing me... it scares me...
I break the eye connection and say "HELLO? I said what's your name?" Fuck! That was rude... damn it... I'm not making a very good first impression... I should just kick myself now.
I hear her angelic voice say "Oh, uh, sorry. I'm... Isabella. Isabella Drake." Isabella... what a beautiful name...
"I'm Malfoy, Draco Malfoy," I say as coolly as I can muster.
She extends her hand to shake mine... I go cold... Why am I nervous about touching a girl's HAND? I've touched so much more, yet she's different. I try to keep my hand steady as I shake her hand. Warmth from her hand seeps into mine, and sends a little shock through my body. That's new. Never has a girl had an affect on me, it's always the other way around. What's going on here?
"Nice to meet you," she says and takes her hand away. Why would she do that? Didn't she feel the connection too?
Suddenly Crabbe and Goyle walk in and spoil everything, ruining my moment with her.
Assuming she's my next slut, they smirk at her. I introduce them and told them to scram. They think it so I can do her, right here, right now. Great now I've got to, they'll ask about her later. Or do I? I could lie and say she was good lay...
All of the sudden, I feel myself being "removed" from my body, my mind loosing control of my body. And then, it's like I'm watching everything from above. I guess they call this an out of body experience. Merlin, this is a weird feeling. I watch and try to get back inside my body. Then I see myself go over and sit next to Isabella.
Oh, fuck! I know that look anywhere! My body is going to do exactly what it is expected to do, and there's nothing I can do to stop it. A part of me wonders how good of a lay she'll be. No, she's different. You can't just strip THIS girl of her innocence. (Yes, I'm sure she's a virgin.)
I start yelling at my body, trying to get to it, to take control before I do what, for the first time, I don't want to do. "GET AWAY FROM HER! STOP IT! SHE'S NOT LIKE THE OTHERS! WE'RE NOT DOING THAT THIS TIME!" I shout at my body. It doesn't listen.
I try to "float" down and stop my body... retake control of it, but it doesn't work. I try and reach down and pry myself off her, but it's as if I'm a ghost, going right through myself. I pray for a miracle, that something would stop me. But by this time, my body has her pinned to the ground. She was screaming bloody murder... thankfully.
Then I even shocked myself. My body grabs a big, metal pole (I have no idea from where) and hits her on top of that beautiful head of hers. The screams stop.
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" I shout down... but my scream goes unheard.
What am I doing to this poor girl? I've never been this violent! Fuck! Just then a black haired boy comes in and throws my body off of Isabella. As my body is thrown off the Isabella, I am thrown back into my body. Relief washes through me, she was safe. At least she is safe. He carries her away from harm, away from me.
*** End Dream ***
Panting and covered in sweat I bolt up in bed.
Breathe... it was just a dream... your ok... Ok, no, it wasn't a dream. It was a memory.
And with that... event... on that very day, I had given up. I allowed myself to completely become the person I am suppose to be. Only when I had this dream, or sometimes when see her laughing carefree with her friends, do I ever remember who I am, who I was.
I look around my room. I am greeted, like every other morning, with the intricate green and dark silver furnishings. The room was very large, and every inch of it screamed Slytherin. I knew without looking that my sheets were such a dark green they would be easily mistaken as black. My blanket was dark green with the Slytherin Crest on it. I knew that once I got up and walked into my closet, I would be surrounded by all the latest wizard fashions, all in green and black. This was normal. This was the way it was. I knew nothing else.
My destiny lies with the Dark Lord. I shall soon take up my place by his side. Until then, I must stay at Hogwarts. (What a pathetic name.) It's "the best wizarding school Draco, and you need to learn as much as you can so you can aid the Dark Lord to the best of your abilities." Slytherin would help me be the Dark Lord's next right hand man. My father was beginning to grow weak with age, and the Dark Lord was putting more pressure on me. My father told me that meant I would take his place in time. When he told me this, I thought I almost saw an emotion in his eye. Pride. Pride in his son for being the next second-most-powerful wizard in the world.
At school, my friends thought I was just a normal know-it-all that got passing marks, but how they're wrong. I was top of the class, well other than that stupid mudblood, but she doesn't know how close behind her I am. My father says I need to be the top of my class in order to prove my worthiness to the Dark Lord, that it isn't possible that some mudblood might be smart enough to be un-out-smart-able. He hasn't seen how much she studies. No one knows how much I study. When I'm off shagging girls, I'm actually studying. I shag them once, and then after that set a charm on them so they think I'm still shagging them. I have learned how to work well with loud distractions.
All the girls I "shag" are stupid bitches, the biggest bitch being Pansy Parkinson. As a Malfoy, I always flirt, I always have the best arm-candy, and I'm never loyal. I have the best rep in school (or worse depending on how you look at it) and that's the way it's supposed to be. When I become a man though, I'll need the right woman by side. Where I'll find her, I don't know. I'll probably end up in an arranged marriage, works for me. Then I'll have that as an excuse to her to do whatever I want, not that I wouldn't do it anyways. Isabella is a woman I could love, and be faithful to. Where the bloody Merlin did that come from?
A little house elf came very timidly and said, "Good morning, sir. Your mother wanted me to remind you that you promised your friends that you'd be in Diagon Alley in an hour to buy your school supplies. And your mother has left you some money on the counter, sir. And that she and your father are off doing business. Is there anything I can do for you, sir?"
Great. Back off to school. At least then I'm not stuck in this place and I'll have people to be with.
"Um sir? Is there anything I can do for you?" the house elf sputtered, tripping over it's words.
"Uh, no... I mean, yeah. I'll have a piece of toast with butter. That's it. I'll be outside so just leave it on my desk," I reply without much thought.
"As you wish sir," the house elf says with a low bow and then is gone. Stupid little creatures. To think that they serve us hand and foot, idiotic creatures. I would never serve anyone, except the Dark Lord, of course.
I get, more fall, out of bed and stumble over to my closet, put on some jeans and a t-shirt, grabbed my broom, walk out onto my balcony, and take off.
A deep sense of relief washes over me. The sky always seems to have that effect on me. It relaxes me, allows me to feel something. Freedom.
I soar above the treetops of the forest that surrounds my mansion. It used to be a magical forest, so my father tells me, but it has been some time since any magical creatures have been spotted, but for some reason it still feels magical to me. Not that I've ever really thought about it.
I flying farther than I have ever flown before, and I notice that as I get farther from my manor, the forest begins to look more and more alive, green, and well, magical. I look below, and get a glimpse of an animal running through the woods. It looked like a unicorn, but was probably just a white horse. After all, this place was no longer magical, right?
I begin to look more closely at the ground, not really sure what I'm looking for when I see a little glade with a running creek. For some reason, I immediately claim it as my own. I've found my own little place, a place to be alone and free. It's a beautiful glade with flowing, green grass, a creek, and a old tree, perfect for climbing it seems. As I descend to my glade, I notice I am not alone. There's a horse grazing in the fields and a figure leaning up against the free. Anger flashes through me for a moment. Fine then, I'll just find my own spot. Right as I'm about to fly off, a glint of gold catches my eye. Looking more closely, I find it's the figures hair that has once again caught my eye, the hair of a certain mudblood, the hair of Isabella Drake. Anger engulfs me and all I see is red.
Hey everyone, thanks for reading. I don't own Harry Potter or any the characters or locations or main plot points that you recognize. They belong to JK Rowling. I did make up Isabella, and the glade and such. I hope you enjoy this story. I hope to come out with the next one soon, but it's Sunday afternoon and I still have homework.
Please please please review! Any suggestions? let me know!