Eleven Years Later
What have I done?
That tiny sentence keeps playing over and over in my mind. Why did I come back? Really I should have just pretended that I had no idea what Hermione was talking about when she turned up on my door. I would have saved myself all this trouble.
But no that's wrong. This is where I belong in this world. Everyone has welcomed me back with open arms just accepting my mistakes. But maybe that makes this all worse. I need someone to yell at me. Someone to look at me and say what were you thinking. Why won't anybody do that?
My mum now normally she would. I suppose she was the closest one to react like that. But then why didn't she do it to my face? She didn't want to hurt me. She still sees me as a child, a baby. I'm grown up with children of my own why can't she include me? I need to be told that I was stupid and wrong. But she's still mothering me.
Dad though well how did I expect him to react? Of course he was going to wrap his arms around me and make me feel safe. He's my father. I've hurt him I know I have but he can see what I've done. He understands my reasons so he's not going to do anything but support me back into the family.
Then Fred and George. Well they're the same. I needed those harsh reactions from them. I needed to see what I had done to the family. But they forgave me too easily. Just like Ron. Why couldn't my brothers over react on this one. They always did when there was a boy in the picture. Hello now there's children and nothing not a thing.
Where the hell am I? France in some random town. This is really going to be good. I can't speak a word of the language and I don't know where I am in a muggle town. Maybe the best thing for me is to head back to Bill's house.
But I don't want to see him. How can he do that to me? Look me in the eyes and say that Draco is still alive. Wait I know this is his way of making me realise what I've done to them. This is his way of making me feel bad for what I've done. Well that just sucks.
But what if Draco is alive? Would he really have gone eleven years without me? My heart screams no but my mind thinks differently. Could he have left his family? No he's got enough of his mother in him to know that family comes first. But maybe he thought it was the only way to protect us. Oh I don't know what to think.
Wait is that? No just some French man. Wow he looks so much like Harry. Now there's my second problem. Harry wants me still. How can he though, I mean I've been 'dead' for eleven years. He must have moved on. But his eyes, when he said all that they were so sincere. Oh my head hurts from all this thinking.
I suppose there's only one thing that I can really do. I need to prove that Bill is lying so that I can move on. If there's even a tiny possibility that he might still be alive I'll never let him go. Maybe then the part of my heart that still belongs to Harry will grow, or maybe I'll just be able to put the pair of them into my past.
I need to move on with my life.