Name: Lily and Prongs; aka Lily

House: Gryffindor

Week: five

characters: Regulus Black

chosen quote: Simple Plan, "God must hate me"

I'm stuck in hell

And I wanna go home

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter universe!

Define 'right'

Two weeks prior, Regulus Black had been so proud. He had known exactly what he wanted; he had known his goals and what was right. But had he really, if he were to ask himself that. Did he actually have any goals? What was right?... Could a person even define 'right'?

He had thought he was doing the right thing in joining the Death Eaters. His brother on the other hand had done the exact opposite, by joining a group that was fighting against Voldemort. Sure Sirius hadn't specifically told him. They had no contact anymore, not since Hogwarts. But he happened to be very good at making conclusions.

He had made the 'right' conclusion after what had happen about two weeks before. When the Dark Lord demanded a house elf, Regulus had eagerly suggested Kreacher, one loyal to the Black family. He had been delighted when the Dark Lord accepted.

But everything changed the moment Kreacher returned to Number 12, Grimmauld Place. He had looked awful and was hardly been able to talk. His voice had been a mere whisper and he had been coughing all the time. He had been so weak that Regulus had to carry him up to his bedroom that day. Later, while the house elf had been telling what had happened and why he was in this horrible state, Regulus had gone paler with every sentence. How could anyone do all that to his Kreacher, even if he was only a house elf? The Dark Lord hadn't said anything about letting the house elf die when he demanded one!

A fortnight later, Regulus was pacing his bedroom nervously. He knew everything he needed to know. He was sure of where he had to go and what to do there. It had been a lot of work to magic a simple silver locket into one that resembled Slytherins' enough to mistake them at the first sight.

He felt sick. How had he gotten into this? When he had joined, he had thought that all this was about stating that pure-blooded wizards were better than Mudbloods and Muggles. He thought it was about giving the say to the right persons; about showing that magic was might.

Well his fellow Death Eaters definitely did show that magic was might. They kidnapped and killed any Muggles who got in their way. Regulas hadn't cared much about it until he had to witness it for himself. On that day he had been with a group that tried again (they had visited her before) to convince a ccertain witch to join their cause. Instead of talking, they had simply tortured her. They also had encouraged him to do the same. "She had her chance", they had said. When she had refused to ally to them and had shouted that she would tell the ministry, they didn't hesitate to use an unforgivable curse.

What had shocked Regulus so much was that they had acted more forcefully than he had ever imagined. He had known that some people had been killed – but to watch it happen was different. It had also shocked him that she had been a pureblood. It made him think.

What if he disagreed with one of them sometime? What if he ever dared to question one of the steps the Dark Lord was planning? What if... what if he ever wanted to quit? The Dark Lord would never let him. He was bound to be a Death Eater. Once a Death Eater, always a Death Eater.

More situations like that had followed. He had pushed them to the back of his mind. It had worked – until he saw Kreacher. Weak, abused. There was no other word to describe it better. It brought back his thoughts about never being able to quit, his fears that no one would care if anything happened to him.

Regulus had suspected the Dark Lord to have made a Horcrux for a while, considering all these statements about immortality. All the arrogant certainty he had said it with. All the other little things he had slipped during their meetings. Knowing Kreacher's tale, Regulus was absolutely sure he was right. And he, Regulus, knew exactly where the Horcrux was right now. It had never meant to be a wizarding ruled world. It was all only about the Dark Lord. He just needed someone to achieve whatever he wanted. Sirius had been right. He should have listened to his brother, just once.

Now, it was too late. He would never be able to live a normal life again. That was all he wanted right then. If he wouldn't immediately end up like the witch they had tortured, he would be on the run for the rest of his life. And it surely wouldn't be a long life. He had seen too much, he knew too much. He had a brother who fought the Death Eaters. They would think he would run straight to him!

He couldn't even deny that he would not. He still disagreed with his brother's opinion on Muggle-borns, as Sirius used to call them, but perhaps Sirius was more right than he was. He wasn't sure whether he could ally to the group his brother was in, whatever group that was, but at least he knew one thing: All the horrible stories about Death Eaters Sirius had told him were true. They differed a bit from the actual occurrences, but Regulus couldn't blame his brother for overdoing it. Sirius had always hated dark magic.

Regulus tightened the grip on the quill in his hand and stopped in front of his desk. He bent over to finish the note which he would take with him to the cave Kreacher had told him about. He read through the few lines he had written once more, and then signed it: R.A.B.

He took a deep breath. There was no other way. He had to do what he was about to do. He would have to find a way to stop Voldemort from gaining more power. This note, he told himself, would be the very last time he referred to Voldemort as the "Dark Lord". Another thing, his brother was perhaps right about: Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself.

Regulus stepped out of the room, and called for the only one who could bring him where he needed to go: "Kreacher?" It was now or never.

author's note: I left out Peter on purpose. In my imagination (based on the HP wiki), he joined after Regulus' death (1979) in 1980. So Regulus didn't know what exactly the Order was or what it was called, and who else was in. But from the way (JKR said something about this topic in an interview) he figured out the Horcrux secret, I can clearly imagine that he figured out his brother was working for this defence group (that's all he knew about the Order).

I'm also talking about only one Horcrux because I doubt that Regulus had ever thought of more than one. We know from the books that even making one is a rare case. We also know that Regulus knew about that secret – but is isn't mentioned that he knew that there was more than one. I think I he had known, he had written something different as a note for the locket.

I assume from the note that he didn't know about the Inferi. I think he thought that he would have at least some time to find a way to destroy the Horcrux when he wrote it.

beta-read by: Phips and Filly (thank you – and I'm glad you liked it ^^)