A/N: I'm SOOO sorry, I haven't updated in what feels like forever but I got hit with a ton of hw and all sorts of other things. So here's chapter 4.

RPOV:

The days of captivity began to run together; same pattern, no change, increasing depression, decreasing hope.

Beginning at sun up, the day was strictly managed, never changing. Women and Men were separated, which had thrown Noah into a panic attack the first day. From, what I could gather, he'd made some promise to Finn to never let me out of his sight.

Mornings were filled with what everyone called "brainwashing sessions", when out of hearing of the eagle-eyed guards of course. They called it "conversion learning." It basically meant sitting in a bare, freezing cold room for hours while someone up front yelled at you about all the wrongs of Judaism and why and how to convert and "get to heaven."

Then they gave us "lunch" which was supposed to be meat, bread and vegetables. It was usually a plate with an unidentifiable brown glob, a thin piece of moldy bread, and drippy green mush. The first couple days some people, especially the older ones made a fuss about the food not being kosher. However, after a couple days when they realized it was all we'd get and it was eat it or starve, the complaints subsided.

After "Lunch" we always had to do some form of hard labor, usually outside. It was the one time I wasn't cold, so maybe it had some benefits. At first, we had to dig a ditch that we were then expected to use as a toilet. Yeah, it was really gross. Then we had to harvest this field. They told us that in winter we would shovel and in spring, plant the fields.

In the evening there was a three hour church service. Finally we were returned to the shack and locked in.

By the time we'd been in the shack for a week, Alex, one of the guys, had figured out how to unlock the bed bars, allowing us to move around a bit at night, not that there was much space anyway. Some nights 5 or 10 of us would gather and talk, some nights Noah and I would sit and talk to Alex and his girlfriend Sarah who were right next to us, but most nights I ended up just talking to Noah.

I learned a whole different side of Noah Puckerman, talking to him late at night, when neither of us could, or wanted to sleep and silence brought the thoughts that I tried hardest to keep away.

One night almost a month after we had arrived at the hell camp, a date which I only knew because of our phones, which regrettably did not get service, that I kept turned off during the day to save battery and turned on once at night, only to keep track of the days and type a quick message that might send if I ever got service, Noah brought up our high school, a subject I tried to stay away from.

"So, slushie facials suck. I've learned that firsthand. But other than that, what was the worst thing Karofsky or any of the other jerks did to you at school?"

"Why are we talking about this?" I sighed when he just shrugged. "Well, you know that elementary school rhyme 'sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me', I don't think that's true, words hurt worst of all sometimes. Like the most hurtful things could be the nasty comments the cheerios hurled at me, or the nasty slurs I'd get because of my dads."

"Oh, I see. So, like Kurt and that f-word?"

"Yes." I replied simply. His words brought to my mind one of those very thoughts I tried to avoid, Finn,(Oh gosh Finn!) calling me one night sobbing that he'd been kicked out of the Hummel's house because he'd said the f-word to Kurt. He'd ended up spending the night, several nights in fact in our spare bedroom, until he'd worked things out with Kurt and his dad, in that ridiculous shower curtain.(Ok, I missed him. I missed him way too much to even think about him.)

"I heard some statistic that like one third of all suicides are homosexuals who have been teased just a bit too much."

"Yes that's right." Oh hell, might as well just bring it all out now. "My dad, in high school, well, he attempted suicide, for that reason. Luckily he didn't succeed, but now he, well he did, lead a support group for homosexual teens considering or having attempted suicide. There are a shocking number within a relatively small area."

"Well that settles it then."

"Settles what?"

"I'm never ever going to use that word again."

"What? Why?"

"Well, I actually already tried to avoid using it; Hummel gets enough grief without me adding to it. But after hearing that stat and you know, maybe I could be the one that pushes someone over the edge. Besides, because of that awful word, you might not be her."

"Oh, well that's good Noah." I said weakly. I was already almost in tears because of the flow of memories mention of my dad and Kurt had brought out, and since when did he care about stuff like that. It was too much.

"Hey, Rach, you okay?"

"Yeah, it's just. Gosh, Noah, I miss them all so much! My dads, Kurt, the rest of our friends, FINN!" With that I burst into tears. He moved closer and pulled me to his chest, holding me tight.

"Shh… it's okay Rach, it's ok, you'll see them all again soon." He murmured. He slowly moved to lie down, still hugging me snugly. I cried in his arms until I fell asleep. I was so fortunate to have him there with me, I thought as I drifted off to sleep.

A/N: So this was kinda a filler chapter, I needed to get some mechanics out of the way, more heartbreaking action next chapter. But hey, return of Sweet!Puck…

Still looking for the sweet moment ideas….definitely can use a couple more…

So? Thoughts? Suggestions? Rotten Tomatoes? Let Me Know!