Title: Collecting the Stars

Genre: Romance/Drama

Rating: M

Disclaimer: I no own

Note: This fic is AU, has slight OOC, and contains Yaoi. You have been warned.

Summary: [AU. Yaoi] – It was hard, moving to Twilight Town with my father so soon after mom died. Life just became a whirlwind then, of sex, drugs, wild parties, and a red head that snuck in through my window every night.

Shout Out: CONGRATS REECHAN37 FOR GETTING INTO THE SCHOOL OF YOUR DREAMS

WARNING: Unbeta'd Beware Errors!!!!

"Blah" means talking

"Blah" means phone conversations

Blah means thoughts

Chapter 9: Don't Let Me Fall

Underneath the moon, underneath the stars
Here's a little heart for you
Up above the world, up above it all
Here's a hand to hold on to

But if I should break, if I should fall away
What am I to do?
I need someone to take a little of the weight
Or I'll fall through

I was the "other woman" to put it simply, the thought made me sick. I was physically ill for two days before I decided to get over it, during this time I had kept my window locked and the blinds closed. I even bought a curtain thick enough to keep the sunlight out, and keep anyone from looking inside.

People, i.e.: Hayner, Pence, and Olette, began to use the front door. Axel hadn't shown his face, it almost made me feel disappointed. But I shouldn't have been all that surprised, it wasn't as if we were exclusive, and we weren't in a relationship, didn't make it hurt any less than it did though.

Instead of dwelling on it, I had decided to focus on what was important and coming up: the new school year. I was going to be a junior this year, the "most important" year supposedly in all of high school since it was the one that colleges went by with test scores and whatnot.

Another thing to look forward to: back to school shopping. Unlike the islands, the high school didn't have school uniforms. The kids from Twilight Town went to Hollow Bastion High School in Hollow Bastion; it was located right outside of Radiant Garden's city limits, which was a twenty minute train ride from town. Cloud had mentioned it over dinner the night before, saying that this weekend we were to go shopping. He was going t borrow Leon's car since, the one he had used to pick me up at the airport with, since his motorcycle didn't really have the storage for bags of clothes and stuff. I was kind of excited to be able to spend some actual time with Cloud for once, since he was always so busy working. It took my mind off of certain red heads.

"How about this shirt?" Cloud asked, pulling out a red graphic-t. It had a dinosaur on it.

I smiled, "add it to the cart." We had been shopping for a good hour now, and have yet to leave the one department store to explore the rest of the mall, I felt like a girl.

We went throughout the entire men's section and only came out with three shirt, two jeans, a pack of boxer-briefs and a pair of sneakers for me, and a few shirts for Cloud.

"I think that should be good, I mean, I have clothes," I stated, ready to leave the store and the mall in general even though we hadn't even been to most of it.

"We still need to get you a backpack and school supplies," Cloud stated, looking through a list that the school had sent us not two days ago. My class schedule was included as well; needless to say my friends and I compared to see if we had any together. Half my classes were with Olette, and two classes with both Pence and Hayner.

I groaned, "No more shopping, please," it's not that I hated shopping, but, well okay, I did hate shopping. Especially for long periods at a time. School shopping with mom had been hell, that's why, after a while, I just let her buy whatever the she wanted me to wear and pretend to be grateful about it later. Most of the time Sora and ended up swapping clothes, my twin had a similar dislike for shopping as well. Sora's idea of dressing up was actually spending more than ten minutes to groom himself.

Cloud chuckled, I think my misery amused him, and if that were the case then he was a sick, sick, man.

"Alright, how about we pay for all of this and then get some food?" He asked, and I couldn't help but nod in agreement. We were in Radian Garden, where, since it was located at the foot of the mountains, it was already starting to get cool despite not even being September yet.

"Food sounds awesome," I said, happy to be leaving the store.

Cloud was an okay guy, he looked like an older version of me, and it reassures me that I'll age well.

The first day of school was like it was every year, I was new but I had friends already so it made the transition easier I suppose. Easier in a sense that I wasn't the only new kid, it would've been harder had I suddenly transferred halfway through the school year, but now I'm just rambling.

Hollow Bastion High School was like every other high school I could think of. The brick two-story building was large, the student and faculty parking lots in the back.

Olette smiled widely as we approached the steps of the school, "it feels like coming back home." She sighed happily.

"Yeah, if your home's a prison," Hayner muttered. We were all dressed in our new clothes; jeans still a little stiff and sneakers not broken in yet. I've noticed that everyone wears their best during that first week or school.

My schedule had been mailed to me about a week ago, along with my locker number and combination. I took in a deep breath and followed my three friends into the high school; this is where I was going to spend most of my life for the next two years.

First period was boring; school had that reliable monotony that made me feel safe and comfortable.

I sat next to a girl named Xion. She was pretty; short black hair, bright blue eyes, and a very nice smile. We joked about literature and talked about the worries of the world. First period was over sooner than either of us liked.

It was later, after second period was over, that I realized that when I was with Xion I forgot all about Axel.

The weekend came quick, Saturday saw me at the mall with Pence and Olette, Hayner was at home helping Demyx pack since he was moving out soon.

"I can't believe that Dem is moving," Pence sighed while looking at a pair of Jordan's. He didn't actually want the shoes since he had gotten a new pair for school but it gave him a second to compose his thoughts. Pence glanced over at Olette, "is Axel going to move too?"

At the mention of his name my heart thumped painfully. Olette seemed hesitant to answer and it made my stomach sink. I hadn't seen or heard from Axel since the last night we spent together a fortnight ago.

"Well, The Nobodies got signed…so he'll have to move closer to where Castle Oblivion Records is located." She explained; picking up a Converse and setting it back down.

"They got signed!?" Pence's eyes were large, surprise clear on his face, "that's awesome!"

Olette gave a tight lipped smile and nodded, "yeah."

I stayed quiet; Axel hadn't bothered to explain anything to me. But, I hadn't confronted him about it either, never even bothered to ask. We were just fuck buddies, I had always known that, but I knew that I had always wanted more. 'We are what we always were,' my own words bit me in the ass.

That's when it hit me hard, the reason why all of this drama with Axel affected me so.

I was in love with him.

Olette and Pence kept talking about something or other. And I sat there in a stupor. It's awful really, I fell in love so quickly, but I knew it was going to take a lifetime to get over it.

"Hey guys!" a girl greeted from behind us. The three of us all turned at the same time. Xion grinned at us as she approached.

Olette grinned back at her, "Xion, how are you? You're here alone?"

"Yeah, my sister ditched me," Xion shrugged, moving a piece of her short hair out of her face. She really was very pretty, and I could see myself beginning to like her as something more than a friend. Not like Naminé, no one could ever replace her, but as something almost as special.

"Wanna hang out with us?" Pence asked.

"I'd love to!" Xion nodded happily, smiling at me the entire time. I had yet to really say a word about anything.

As the four of us headed towards the movie theater I couldn't shrug off the feeling that this was a set-up double date.

It was a month later, at homecoming (which I was forced to attend) that Xion kissed me.

She was blushing as she pulled away, "I really like you Roxas."

My heart ached and my head spun, but I offered her a weak smile, "I like you too." And I did, just not in the way that she wanted me to. Axel had left Twilight Town and I haven't heard from him since before summer was over, there was no point in my pinning, I had to move on with my life. Love wasn't just something one forgot, it wasn't something that one could just turn off when they got tired of it, and I was learning that the hard way.

"Wanna be my girlfriend?" I asked, staring her straight in the eye. It was déjà vu, until I realized that I used the exact same words to ask Naminé out way back in June. Was it only five months ago? Time felt longer.

Xion beamed at me, "yes!" She then kissed me again. She probably felt some spark, or at least told herself that she did. I felt nothing.

I didn't want to use Xion like this, she was a nice girl; sweet and pretty and smart. The best thing about her was that she helped me forget about a certain redhead. Whenever she was around Axel was far from my mind.

Winter Holiday came with snow. It was my first time seeing the cold, white, powder that blanketed nearly everything. It was amazing, and I couldn't help but wish that I could share the experience with the person that I loved. I felt pathetic, always thinking about him, never wanting to say his name out loud. I had Xion now, and even though she was only a temporary distraction, she was still my girlfriend and current love interest.

We had been together for two months now, and she was ready to do more than just kissing. I, however, was not.

During the holidays both Hayner and Olette were bummed out by the fact that their brothers couldn't make it home. Sora and Riku showed up though, it was a little awkward. Cloud expected Riku to sleep upstairs while Sora and I shared my room, he didn't want to two to sleep together in the same bed. Not in his house.

"I don't want to think about any of you kids doing anything like that until marriage. Or at least until college," Cloud had explained, making the rest of us burst into laughter. Even Leon, serious guy that he was, snickered at Cloud's expense.

Riku spent most of the holiday's at our house before taking the train to Radiant Garden to spend time with his father and brother. Right when he left was when everyone was able to hang out, and they had yet to meet him. Olette began to tease Sora about having an imaginary boyfriend. Once everything was settled down though, the house was very quiet, leaving Sora and I alone to our own devices.

"So, where's this girlfriend you've told me so much about?" my twin asked, sprawled out spread-eagle on my bed and hogging the blankets. I merely stared at him from my spot at my desk. I had been working on an English paper that was due once break was over.

"Do you actually want to meet her?" I asked curiously. Sora sat up, his hair even messier than usual, and he gave me a grin that I had seen only too many times before. It meant trouble.

"Of course I do, why else would I ask?" He got out of bed and made his way over to my closet. Pulling out some jackets and boots to help with the cold, I just rolled my eyes and followed his lead.

"She lives in Hollow Bastion," I told him easily, taking the house key that Cloud had given me a copy of once school started. A house key was helpful seeing as it was near impossible to climb in and out of a window in winter gear.

We took the train to Hollow Bastion; it was a ride that I had now gotten used to by now but Sora was still new to everything and treated it all like a novelty. He stared out of the windows and held onto the seats for dear life. While on the train I texted Xion, asking her if it was okay for me to stop by and that my brother wanted to meet her.

"So, have you heard from Nam?" Sora asked casually as we exited the train.

I shook my head; it didn't surprise me that I hadn't heard from her, "negative. Have you?"

"Nope," he sighed.

"Nam's the type of girl who'll get famous quick and die of an overdose young," I stated, shoving my hands in my pockets to keep them warm.

"That's horrible," Sora chastised me, but nodded in agreement. My first girlfriend was something else.

Xion lived in a small house on the outskirts of town, so we had to take a bus to get there. She had been waiting for us, because as soon as we ascended the stairs of the porch the front door opened.

"Hey," she smiled, she always seemed so cheerful and happy, and it always lightened my mood.

"Hey," I smiled back and we kissed each other on the cheek in greeting. "This is my brother, Sora. Sora, this is my girlfriend, Xion."

"It's so good to finally meet you," Xion greeted, giving Sora a hug.

My brother hugged back, "likewise, I've heard a lot about you."

"All good things I hope," she winked as she pulled away from him. Xion moved so that she was facing the both of us, "come on in, enjoy some cocoa and stay a while."

I felt a surge of pride ripple through me, this girl new exactly how to act when it came to meeting the family. At that moment I wished more than anything that I would fall in love with her, she seemed like my perfect match.

We stayed at Xion's place for about three hours before heading back home.

"What'd you think of her?" I asked, "Be honest." Sora's opinion really mattered to me.

Sora shrugged, kicking at the snow, "she's nice. She's different from your past beau's."

And she was. Xion wasn't dramatic; she didn't have a problem with drugs or commitment. She wasn't all-knowing, and she had normal colored hair. She didn't always know exactly what to say and her eyes weren't green. She didn't captivate me the same way as the others had. I wasn't morbidly fascinated by her.

"She is different, she's not dramatic." I agreed.

Sora shook his head, "that's not what I meant Rox."

"Explain."

My brother sighed, "I can't really explain it all that well. But, Xion will make the perfect wife for some lucky guy some day. But she doesn't seem right for you. It's like you're trying so hard to forget Axel that you're forcing yourself to become this other guy. This family type guy, and that's just not you Rox." He looked over at me, identical blue eyes to my own, "you're in love with Axel, anyone who was around during the summer can see it. It's understandable that you want to get over it, but don't force it to go away because that'll only make things worse."

"Anyone who was around during summer can see it?" I asked, slightly panicked.

"No, but I can. And I'm sure Olette and Riku can too." Sora bumped his shoulder against mine, "don't worry too much about it Rox. You'll get over it eventually."

This time I sighed, "I hope so."

Spring Break came fast and Hayner had gotten a car.

"What're your plans for this Spring Break?" he asked while waxing his car lovingly.

I drank my milkshake and shrugged, "I was thinking of going back to Destiny Island for a few days. Stay with Sora and Riku and just enjoy the beach."

"How far of a drive is it?" Hayner asked with an excited glint in his eyes.

"Between eight to ten hours, depending on how fast you're going," I answered cautiously. I didn't like the look he was giving me.

Hayner grinned, "We're going."

"What?" milkshake forgotten.

"We're going to Destiny Island with you. We: me, Pence, Olette, and Xion if you want." He just continued to grin.

I shook my head, "I'll have to ask Sora first, since I was going to crash as his place."

"Call him and let me know, I'll tell the others." Hayner seemed dead set on it.

I frowned and took out my cell. I never talked about Destiny Island with my friends, not even when they asked about it.

"Aloha bro-ha," Sora answered, I could hear the smile on his face, "it's an honor to hear from you good sir."

"Are you high?" I asked bluntly.

"Only on life!" Sora answered with a laugh, "what's up dude?"

"You know how I was going to go back home for Spring Break?" I asked, fiddling with the ring on my pointer finger.

"How can I forget?" Sora replied. I could imagine him lounging on his couch, eating chips and watching TV while on the phone with me. He sounded like he was in a lazy mood.

"Would it be okay if everyone else comes too? You know, Hayner, Pence, Olette, and Xion. I told them I was going and now they want to come with." I said, slightly hopping for rejection.

"Oh, let me ask the love of my life first," Sora said, "hang on a sec." He placed the phone down but I could still hear him yell "RIKUUUU!" across their condo. Their voices got low, they were discussing this and I waited patiently. Hayner came up to me with a questioning look on his face.

"They're deciding," I said to him. He nodded and went back to his car.

"I called everyone already, they're all up for it, the only thing is that Xion has to lie to her mom and tell her that she's going with only Olette. That aside— it's all good man." He grinned happily, and then I felt horrible for hoping that his dreams of Destiny Island would be crushed.

"Alrighty, the tribe has spoken!" Sora's voice filled my ear again, a slight laugh to his tone, "and we say yes to having you and all of your friends here."

"Okay, thanks Sora," I sighed with a mixture of relief and disappointment.

"No problemo Rox. I love you; see you in a few days." He chirped happily.

I smiled, "love you too Sor. Bye." We both hung up.

Hayner looked at me expectantly, "well?"

The smile that had formed on my face only widened, "he said yes."

Hayner threw his hands up in the air, "awesome!"

Cloud was home early by the time I had gotten back. He was in the kitchen drinking coffee and trying to figure out what to make for dinner.

"I opt for sandwiches," I told him, passing him in favor for the fridge.

He nodded, "that's actually a good idea." He turned to face me, back leaning against the kitchen sink. "How was your day?"

"Good I guess," I answered, popping open a soda, "Hayner convinced Sora to let him and everybody else come with me when I go visit. So we're going to drive, I already returned my bus ticket."

Cloud arched an eyebrow, and I copied him pose for pose without meaning to, "and their parents are all okay with this?"

I shrugged, "they all said yes so I'm guessing they are. Besides, everyone is seventeen."

"Except you, you're still sixteen," Cloud pointed out, frown marring his face, "I'll allow you to go because I know it's to visit Sora. But I'll be honest when I say that I don't like the fact that you'll be alone with Xion for a few days like that. Unsupervised. It's not that I don't want you to enjoy life and its experiences. I just don't want you to knock her up."

To my surprise I grinned at him, "relax, we may be going out and stuff, but I'm sure as hell not ready for that step. Besides, we can just as easily do it while our parents are at work."

"You're making me rethink a lot of things when you say that Roxas," Cloud smirked.

I laughed, "Jeez Dad, you need to relax."

It wasn't until hours later that I realized that I had called him Dad.

We were all awake by five thirty in the morning two days later, saying goodbye to our parents and packing up Hayner's car with our bags.

"Be safe you guys," Aeris said, kissing all of us on the cheek. "I packed some lunch," she handed Olette a small cooler. "Be good you guys."

We headed off, me riding shot gun next to Hayner, Pence's phone acting as a GPS. Three hours later found us refilling up the car and me and Hayner switching places on driving, since I knew where I was going for the most part and Hayner was tired from getting up so early. At nine Pence complained about hunger pains and Olette passed around the sandwiches that Aeris had made for us as breakfast, along with some juice boxes.

The radio was on low and Hayner was still out like a light, I drank my juice box while driving way past the speed limit. Olette and Xion were talking quietly in the back over a magazine and Pence was reading a book.

At one it was time to refill the gas and wake Hayner up so that we could switch since my leg was hurting. We had lunch and then continued on our way, arriving to the mainland at two-thirty in the afternoon.

"This is part of Destiny?" Olette asked, eyeing the palm trees that surrounded the road.

I shook my head, "no, we still have to take the ferry to get there." I told Hayner how to get to the docks and paid the fair to take the car over to the island. Once on the ferry we all got out of the car and stretched our legs, the sea air hitting our faces.

"This is nice; did you have to take the ferry a lot when you lived in Destiny?" Hayner asked, stretching his back.

"Yeah, there's no school on the island so we had to come to the mainland for that." I took a deep breath of the salty air. It had been almost a year since I've bothered coming back, a year since mom died.

"This feels nice," Xion said in a low voice, eyes closed as the warm breeze hit us from the side.

"We should be getting back to the car soon, we'll be docking in five minutes," I murmured, enjoying the ocean much more than I'd thought I would.

We ambled our way back to the car; I took the driver's seat since it was just easier than trying to explain all the little roads on the island. We put the windows down and drove at a nice pace, the others all looking out at everything they could see.

The roads were cobble stoned and there were palm trees in almost every direction, fallen coconuts at their bases. The shops on Main Street looked chic and modern; people were milling about, walking around or lounging. Everyone in Destiny knew each other, so it was no surprise that people were staring at us as we drove by.

We passed the small record store just as three teenagers walked out.

"ROXAS!" a girl's voice shrilled loudly in surprise, which caused me to stop the car and reverse.

Selphie, Tidus, and Wakka were staring at me. Until Selphie squealed and tried to hug me through the window, as usual she broke the silence.

"Oh my gosh!" she gushed, planting a big, wet, kiss on my cheek, "Sora didn't tell us you were coming!"

"It was supposed to be a surprise?" I guessed lamely.

"Does Kairi know? If she knows and she didn't tell me then I'll be very mad!" Selphie pouted, pulling away from me.

I shrugged, "probably not?"

Tidus and Wakka looked like they wanted to hug me too, but were too manly to do it in public.

"Ya were goin' to Riku's?" Wakka asked; his accent as thick as ever.

"Yeah," I nodded, "we'll be staying there for the next few days."

"Alright! We'll make sure to stop by! And then we can be properly introduced to your friends," Tidus smiled at the others charmingly.

I grinned, "Yeah, we'll see you guys later then?"

"No doubt," Tidus nodded.

"See you later man," Wakka grinned.

"We'll so go over to visit you tonight!" Selphie bounced.

I waved to them and drove off once again.

"I'm guessing those were your friends?" Pence asked from behind me, voice holding an amused tone.

I chuckled, "yeah, Tidus, Wakka, and Selphie. I've known them my entire life."

Riku lived in a nice condo; it had a stoop with a porch in the front. It was two floored with two bedrooms and two bathrooms. The master bedroom and bath were upstairs while the guest room and bath were downstairs with the half kitchen and small living room/dining room combo.

"So we'll finally get to meet the ever mysterious Riku, eh?" Hayner asked, lifting open the trunk so that we could all take our bags out.

"If there is a Riku," Olette laughed, but it came out as a yawn at the end. Despite napping along the way I was tired too.

"There is a Riku," I sighed, leading the way up to the red front door.

Pence laughed, "Once I meet him I'll believe it."

I rolled my eyes and rang the doorbell three times in a row. A moment later a shirtless Riku answered the door; there was a tank top in his hand.

"Hey Roxas and company," He greeted with his usual smirk.

"For the love of God, Riku put your damn shirt on," I glared, turning my face away from him and looking at my friends. They were all blushing. I understood where they were coming from; Riku was too good looking to be real. A beautiful face and a body that would've made the Greek Gods jealous, on top of that he was smart. Riku was the whole package, and he belonged to Sora.

"Only for you Rox," Riku answered smoothly and put his shirt on, "come on in, we just finished cleaning up the place and making it pretty for you. Sora's in the shower." He wagged his eyebrows at me. "And that's where I was too until a few seconds ago." He said it only loud enough for me to hear.

"Dude, I don't want to hear that," I groaned.

Riku laughed, "You guys can put your stuff in the guest room. It has a two beds and a futon for the floor so three people can share this room. The couch folds out, so two people can share it. But we'll discuss sleeping arrangements and stuff when the time comes."

Once we put our bags away we went into the kitchen were Riku was waiting with cans of Paopu Juice, "who's thirsty and or hungry?"

I sighed, "Guys, this is Riku." I gestured over to him and he waved. "Riku, this is Hayner," the two shook hands, "Pence," they took hands too. "Olette" Riku gave her a kiss on the cheek, "And Xion," he repeated what he had done to Olette.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all. I've heard stories and such from Sora, but since we've never met I was beginning to think that Roxas made you all up," he smirked at me knowingly.

"Shut up," I glared.

A moment later we could hear Sora's footsteps as he rushed down the stairs, "hey guys!" He greeted, practically a bouncing ball of energy. "I'm guessing you've met Riku? Yeah, I told you he was real!"

This statement caused both Pence and Olette to burst out into peals of laughter.

There was a bonfire party on the Small Island, also known as the Play Island, to celebrate my return home as well as meeting new friends.

Kairi leaned against me as we roasted marshmallows, there was an old radio playing the latest songs, the D.J talking every once in a while and a commercial playing once every twenty minutes.

"You're girlfriend seems nice," she stated, voice kept low. Xion was talking to Tidus and Wakka about American Football; they seemed to be charmed by her.

"She is nice," I said sharply, Kairi was a lot like Naminé, she just knew.

I paid attention to the radio; Sora had raised the volume so he could listen to it better. Suddenly a voice pours through the speakers, vocals that I knew pretty well.

Axels' was singing about a kid he used to know with blue eyes and wondering about lost love and suicide. I stared at the radio; everyone had gone silent to listen to him and the rest of the band. Demyx had a guitar solo halfway through and suddenly the song was more punk rock then it was ballad. When the song was over the D.J came back on, "that was a new band on the scene called The Nobodies with their debut single Roxy."

Olette began to squeal, taking Sora's arm and jumping up and down with him. Pence and Hayner began to talk excitedly at once and I stared at the radio, feeling sick to my stomach.

The Nobodies were making it big. And the man whom I had tried so hard to forget was suddenly shoved into my face.

"Are you okay?" Kairi asked me, a worried expression on her face.

"No," I whispered, allowing my marshmallow fall into the fire.

Damn it.

The song was called Roxy; it was about a blue eyed kid, lost love, and suicide. I was going to be sick. I pushed away from the fire, and made my way towards the small fresh water pond, wanting to splash some water onto my face.

A soothing hand rubbed small circles on my back; I had half expected it to be Sora and was unpleasantly surprised to see Xion.

"You alright Rox?" She asked.

She was here, making sure I was okay and Axel was God knows where singing to anyone who would listen about me. Everything felt so damn wrong.

TBC

ECK: See how different life without Axel is? I miss Nam XD. I leave this chapter there, wrote the entire thing at work, hehe I'm naughty. This was just about 13 pages of pure fun, only one more chapter left and then it's all over so please review. Flames are welcome.