Beat of My Own Drum

So like 3 more chapters after this one :) then I may do another one.

8:00 P.M.

So I am having dinner with my boyfriend , my ex-best friend , my ex enemy , their boyfriends who happen to be Shane and Jason. Then last but certianly not least in my book Nate and his confirmed fiancé Dana. Well not publicly confirmed but she has a ring on her finger so...

I was enjoying myself , well Robby was doing most of the talking I just smiled and nodded like a trophy girlfriend. I think thats all I really am sometimes and I kind of find myself a hypocrite because I told Nate I didn't want him to use me like 5 years ago and now here I am a trophy girlfriend one of the most ultimate ways to be used.

"So Caitlyn how did you nab such a nice catch like Robby here?" Mitchie asked me , I think she didn't like him as much as she let on.

This is usually my least favorite part of the night when Robby brings me to things like these , one thing trophy wives and girlfriends need to be good at is putting on a little smile and dance .

" I met him while I was studying in Juilliard before I dropped out . I am actually a manager at a CD shop now so music isn't completely out of my life." I smiled . I actually feel like a robot right now.

"That is really shocking considering how driven you were when we were younger."For the first time tonight Nate spoke to me .

"Well priorities change and so do people." I simply smiled at him.

"There is one thing Caitlyn here is good for and that is she can actually make a good mix. Well that and..." Robby trailed smugly trying to belittle me and show me off at the same time , that is one of his biggest habits.

"We get the picture." Mitchie smiled and then Tess eyed me kind of in a sympathetic way , like she knew what I was feeling.

The silence was awkward so I excused myself saying I needed some air. When I got outside I sat on a bench and sighed I hate my life.

Then someone sat next to me "I know how you feel , like how you are never good enough." I heard Tess say.

"It sucks , no matter what he just sees me as a-" I was cut off by Tess.

"Trophy , trust me I know how you feel . My mom has always been the same way with me ." She got something out of her purse. "Do you want one?" She asked holding up a cigarette.

"Sure why not." I said and then lit it (I dont smoke so...). I smiled at her , I dont do drugs but I do smoke every once in a while when I need to blow off steam.

"I sometimes wish that I was normal like you or like Mitchie was before she met Shane." Tess said.

" I'm definitely not normal." I sighed and then put out my cigarette. (Again I don't smoke) "Thanks for talking to me Tess. I wish we could have been better friends." I smiled at her.

" Me too , the only friend it feels like I have sometimes is Jason." She blushed "I really do love him , our relationship isn't just an act." She blushed again. "Sometimes I wonder how I got him." She giggled.

"I'm happy for you Tess." I giggled too , it has been a while since I've been truly happy.

"We should head back in there. " Tess said.

We walked back in and our food was there I sat down next Robby and Tess sat down next to Jason . I smiled at her one last time and she smiled back.

Later that night

Robby and I walked into the apartment.

"Tess really likes you. " Robby whispered into my ear as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Thanks." I smiled at him and kissed him lightly.

"I love you ." He said to me looking me straight in the eye.

"I love you too." I fake smiled.

Maybe someday I will feel the same was Tess does .

I know this is probably crap compared to my old stuff. If you read Affairs at 15 then please vote in the poll , it closes on friday and I want to know whether you think I should make a epilogue or sequel :)