A/N: So I hope you guys like this chapter, I took some dialogue and scenes from the manga so yeah. I added my own twist to some of it though. All criticism welcomed!
Chapter 6
All I thought about was Haru. Haru this, Haru that. Everything reminded me of him! Anything and everything! I couldn't escape him; he was in every part of my life now.
Ever since he kissed me a few days before I couldn't escape his face. Some days it got so bad that I just wanted to call him and tell him to come to my room. Then I would throw myself at the mercy of Haru and beg for forgiveness. But, those were the days where I lost sight of the prize, and uncursed and happy Haru, so much better than my own happiness.
"Rin Sohma, you're ready to check out," the cheerful nurse stated patting my bag and carrying it out to the waiting room where Hatori was waiting for me.
"Hello Isuzu," Hatori greeted taking the bag from the nurse.
I glared at him; he was the one who put me in here in the first place. He walked out of the hospital and I followed him to the car. We drove in silence for a while, and then he broke it.
"Do you want to go to the summer house? Everyone is there right now," he asked looking over at me for a second then back to the road.
"Whatever," I answered even though I needed to go there to ask Gure-Nii-san about how to break the stupid curse.
If anyone were to know how to break it, it would be him. Akito's favorite…Shigure Sohma. How sickening…favorites and Akito hates me for no reason.
"Hatsuharu is there too," Hatori interrupted my thoughts.
I looked at him as the words hit my ear drums. Haru...I couldn't see Haru! No! I just can't! I need to see him…I want to see him. I want to cry to him, I can't cry to him. I can't see him, can't want him, can't hold him, kiss him love him.
I can't do anything.
After an hour of driving we arrived at the summer house.
"Don't you dare tell anyone I'm here…" I warned giving Hatori another glare as I climbed out of the car.
"Secret's safe with me," he joked, I knew he would tell some one that some one couldn't be Haru though.
"Don't you tell Haru, I'll never forgive you if you do," I threatened slamming the car door.
Hatori walked into the house, I chose to walk around the outside where all the grave sights and picturesque landscape was. I was walking around for quite a while before I started feeling sick. I coughed harder and harder. I thought my lungs were going to come up through my throat. I fell to the grass and grasped my chest, coughing harder still.
"Who's there?" I heard Yuki's voice coming towards me.
I whipped my head around and he was standing there, without anyone yet. I composed myself and ran. I ran fast and far, then my body gave up. I collapsed on the ground a few miles forward. I couldn't stand being a human anymore, I fainted.
When I woke up I looked around, through different eyes though.
Damn it! I can't be like this right now!
I got up on all four of my legs now. I continued to run. I ran passed Yuki and that girl again. I felt my legs fall from under me and I landed on the green grass with a thud. I was falling in and out of conscious, and then I saw them. The hurried over to me.
"Isuzu Sohma! I'm so glad to finally meet you!" Tohru greeted happily.
I wanted to cry to her, not kick her. But, I chose the second one instead at that moment of anger. Yuki caught my foot luckily, I didn't want to hurt Tohru, merely scare her.
Change back to human! Change back!
Then pop I was human again and naked in front of the two. I really didn't care, it didn't phase me and they didn't seem to mind. I stared at them both long and hard, what do they care if I'm weak? I know I was at the time but I wouldn't admit it and Yuki knew as well as I did. I looked at the pair, back and forth, and then I picked myself up and ran again.
Just keep running, soon you'll be away from here, I told myself letting my hair fly in the wind as I scanned the ground for my clothes.
I finally stumbled across them and scrambled to put them on. I pulled my long black sleeve when I turned and saw Yuki standing by a tree only feet away from me. He only stared then walked towards me. I knew he told Haru, I knew it…that traitor! Yuki got closer and closer.
"Why are you here Rin? You know Haru is here and he told me that you broke up with him," He tried to put his hands on me.
I knew then that if I let him comfort me that I would grow to expect that from everyone and I am never going to be that weak no matter what. I pulled my arm back into my body and walked backwards.
"STAY AWAY FROM ME YOU PIECE OF SHIT!" I shouted running away from Yuki but I was stopped along my way out.
"Rin…" I heard his voice, clear as a bell.
I stopped dead in my tracks, unable to move, so helpless to his presence. He is the type to demand my attention without knowing what he's doing. I craned my head slowly around to see Haru standing there in all his radiant beauty. The sun reflected off his features so perfectly he looked almost angelic, the sight made me melt inside.
"What do you want?" I asked coldly turning my eyes into ice.
"What are you doing here Rin?"
"None of your business," I answered standing straight now.
"Maybe not, but I still care about you," he answered straight up.
That's one of the things about Haru, he was always honest and got to the point, and he never danced around a subject if it begged to join the waltz.
I stepped backwards, almost stumbling over a root that was protruding from the ground. I stood in one spot now; his eyes were piercing through my carefully constructed façade. I was helpless to his gaze, and the feelings of having to beg for forgiveness hit me full force. I needed to be in his arms again, and instead of my face showing that, it showed anger towards him.
"So what? I don't love you anymore, I don't need you," I coldly contradicted.
He didn't look the least bit phased by it.
"So, it doesn't matter if I die?" Haru asked staring me in the eye.
My eyes widened, was he mental? If he died, what would I do? I couldn't just go on existing without him.
Life without Haru is not a life. Life like that is wondering around an empty shell when your last fill has been ripped away from you. Just walking around surviving, everything meaning nothing, sleeping with a pit in your stomach of a void so deep black isn't the right color for it…that is no way to live. To live without Haru is to live life without passion. No way to live at all, I can't live that way.
He reached out to grab my arm. I yanked it away, even when I had convinced myself that life isn't worth it without Haru. He persisted, still again even when I rejected him.
He reached out again, "KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF OF ME!" I shouted backing up even further tripping over the tree roots.
Haru grabbed my arms and picked me up. He spun me around in a circle like in all those cheesy romance movies and then pulled my body close to his, the kiss. It happened as if it were written in the script of said romance movie.
How long had I waited for that kiss? The one where it made my whole world tremble and my body ache for more…the one that meant that he loved me even when I rejected him time after time. I don't remember his lips tasting so sweet, or being so soft.
I couldn't stand not being close to him, I clung to his shirt. My tongue caressed his in a crazy battle for affection, I needed more, and it would never be enough with just this kiss. His hand was holding the back of my head and messing my hair up a little, the other was holding my hips in place against his. How I longed for more skin to skin contact with
I wish that moment would have lasted forever.
But soon the kiss broke and he only looked me in the eye and said, "I love you Rin, no matter how much you want to be away from me. I won't leave you alone," he informed me as if it were a bad thing.
It was for my plan but not for my heart. More than anything I needed Haru.
I looked at him; I couldn't stand seeing him like this. I turned and ran, for as long as my body could take it. Physical pain was nothing compared to the hole that was tearing every second I saw Haru standing there telling me that he loved me…
I don't know what to do anymore…