Summary: Just divorced, Chuck thinks that all is said between him and Blair. But why does she show up at his doorstep at night? Future fic.

AN: Words can't even express how much I adore you guys! 34 reviews for the last chapter! I'm really happy that all of you seem to like my story! Therefore I also have to apologize for making you wait that long for the next chapter, I hope you enjoy it.

I apologize in advance for any spelling or grammar mistakes. This chapter hasn't been betaed!

To Sam: If you read this, I tried sending you the chapter several times, is your e-mail adress still correct? Let me know, please!

Special thanks, this time to Sandra! Who helped me getting over my writers block, by majorly kicking my ass! Vielen, vielen Dank!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything!

Way Back Into Love

Chapter 9: Third Base-Ish

Would you like to come upstairs?

Oh man, what had she been thinking. Coming into their old apartment with Chuck was a really, really bad trip down memory lane. It was the classical Upper East Side High Society Apartment for a couple with double income and no kids. Every newlyweds dream in Manhattan. Dark hard wood floors, big windows, high ceilings.

A dream place to raise a family, the realtor had said. But instead of lullaby's sounding through the halls, all Blair could remember was her and Chuck screaming at each other. Yes, sure they had had good times in here too, but outside of the bedroom those had been very less, those past couple of years.

"Can I get you something to drink?" Chuck didn't seem nearly as uncomfortable as she.

She just shook her head no before sitting down on the dark leather couch. All this was so surreal. This had been her home for the last ten years and suddenly she had to act like a guest in it. She couldn't just go to the fridge and get herself a bottle of water if she felt like it. Would she have to ask him for using the bathroom as well?

"Are you sure your okay?"

For a moment she felt relieved. Because apparently he had noticed her level of indisposition being back here. But then she realized his eyes switching nervously between hers and her scarf clutched skull.

My, over all her unease of being back here she had almost forgotten that she had just gotten her head shaved thirty five minutes ago.

In a realizing motion she moved her hand over her head, "Maybe I'm starting to think if I was a little to hasty. I'm not even starting chemo until the end of next week..." a minute later her thoughtful mood was replaced with the - to her ex-husband - all to familiar bitchy mood. "Thanks a lot for keeping me from making any rash decisions, Bass. Great call, really!"

Even though he rolled his eyes, she thought that there was a hint of smirk playing with the corners of his mouth. Of course, she thought, even she preferred old bitch Blair to this very new depressed model.

"You know, your hairdresser really knew why she made you sign that piece of paper saying that this was your wish. And making you confirm that you were in your right mind."

"Yeah, well maybe I wasn't... It was a rush of adrenaline! I mean look at me! What person in her right mind agree to this?" she was getting a tad hysterical. "What the hell was I thinking? I have a brunch, discussing the 'Feed The Children' charity the day after tomorrow! Should I go like this? With the scarf my ex-husband used to wear in highschool wrapped around my head? Talk about pathetic."

While she had jumped up of the couch, pacing around in the living room ranting like a crazy person, he just remained in his seat across from her. Upper body slightly leaned forward and hands interwinded between his legs.

"No one even knows about this, yet! God, what was I thinking, doing this when I was in a such vulnerable state of mind... no wait a second... What were you thinking letting me do this?"

She stopped for a second studying her reflection in the glass of the antique mirror.

"Pitiful," she muttered.

At that he stood up, walking towards her in purposeful steps. He stopped right behind her, looking at their both reflection in the glass.

Her shoulders tensed immediately when she could see his hands working their way up to her forehead, starting to pull the scarf off. Her left hand skimmed across his trying to keep it from moving any further backwards.

A quiet "No!" came from her lips but he, being stronger, shook her hand away easily and pulling the cloth of her completely.

Her eyes closed the moment she felt the last touch of silk leaving her head.

His hands lay firm on her slim hips now, stopping her from moving away and she could feel the warm breath of him on her cheek. It seemed like a déjà vu. The smell of their apartment in filling her nostrils combined with the familiarity of his touch. His warm body standing so close behind her, his hands firm and yet supporting on her body.

"Open your eyes, Blair."

If it was the warmth in his words or just the familiar feeling, she didn't know, but right then she didn't fight the urge to let herself sink back against his chest anymore.

Still she kept her eyes closed, shaking her head slightly.

"Let me show you how beautiful you are."

"But I'm just not." It was barley a whisper.

"Yes you are." Those words he breathed into her ear sending shivers up and down her spine.

A gasp escaped her lips as she felt his hands moving from her hips further down onto her thighs. His fingers slowly moving up the skirt of her dress. She knew that she should've stopped this. That this was just another way to complicated things between them even more. But she didn't want it to stop.

It felt to good feeling his finger tips exploring the insight of her thighs while his other arm had gone around her abdomen. If it was to support her or keeping her from running away, she didn't know or care. Being back in Chuck's arms was all that mattered.

His passed the last barrier of her panties fast and Blair couldn't help but wonder if he had know how much she had wanted this to happen all day long, ever since their hands had touched briefly in the hospital. If he had longed the same way.

Her mouth opened for a mute shriek when he reached her throbbing sex. Pinching it just slightly. As he moved away, further down she almost let out a cry for the loss of contact, but just then he entered her with one finger. Quickly adding another only a second later.

When he started thrusting, her hips jerked forward wanting to feel more of him inside of her, deeper inside of her.

As his thrust grew faster and harder she could feel herself coming closer to the edge each second and when his thumb started to circle her clit again she was gone. Helplessly convulsing around his fingers as he breathed the words "Now open your eyes!" into her ear.

In her ecstatic state of mind she couldn't do much but comply. Practically jerking her eyes open she saw her reflection. Hers and Chuck's reflection.

Her lips parted an inch.

Her eyes dark with lust.

The cheeks slightly flushed.

His arm around her waist holding her in place.

The other hand still buried deep between her legs.

The dress pushed up above her hips

His eyes also glazing with desire.

And right then she thought that this was the most erotic way she had ever seen herself in. Bald or not... she couldn't cared less if she tried at this moment. He was right. She was beautiful.

"Thank you," she whispered, breaking the silence in the room, where only her heavy breathing had been heard a moment before.

He pressed a light kiss onto her cheek before answering, "Your welcome, Waldorf."

Even though, she was positive that she could stay like this forever, she was the first one to break their embrace, straightening herself up and making half a step forward.

Surprisingly there was no real awkwardness. Looking up at his reflection in the mirror, while she fixed her dress, she could see him behind her with a little smile on his lips, while he cleaned his fingers on his handkerchief. After he was finished and had pocketed the cloth, she didn't even have to say a word for him to adjust the scarf around her head again.

When he was finished she turned around, catching his eyes almost shyly.

"You think, Arthur would mind giving me a lift home?"

"You know, you don't--" he started but was interrupted by her quickly.

But she interrupted him immediately, decided but with a smile nonetheless, "Yes I do."

After a second of thinking he agreed with a nod, kissing her forehead. "Let me get your coat."

---

If I fall asleep now, I get three hours of sleep.

Oh, who was he kidding. Sleep was out of the questions. For hours he'd been turning in bed. Thinking. About her. Blair Waldorf had made her way back into his mind and there was no way of getting her out.

Was what had happened today a mistake? Had he opened Pandora's box? There was so much unsaid between them.

Every time he thought that he finally had her banned from his life she came back like a force of nature.

Studying the ceiling he thought about how many nights they had spend in this bed together. It had always felt good. And he wasn't even thinking about the love making. All those nights together knowing that there was someone. Someone who shared your fears, hopes and dreams. For nothing in the world he would ever wanna exchange those nights.

It had been in this bed where he had asked her to marry him. Ten years, four months and eleven days ago. Spontaneous. They had been lying there in their post-orgasmic bliss and somehow the question had just spilled from his lips. Actually it was more of a command then a question.

"Marry me!"

For a brief second after he had asked he'd been afraid that she would beat him unconscious with her tiny fist, for not proposing properly or even having a ring.

But she had just leaned up on an elbow, smiled and kissed him. And then she'd said yes. Just like that.

Never in all those years he had ever regretted marrying her. Even if he would know about all the hurt, fighting and cheating in advance, he would marry her again in a heartbeat.

"Are you awake?"
"Now I am. What?"
"I want a divorce."
"Is it that time in the month already?"
"I'm serious."
"No you're not. You never are. You think your serious, until you think about how much classier it is for a married woman to throw a dinner party instead
of being a divorcee in your thirties."
"I can't go on living like this."
"Living like what? In wealth? Spending my money while I work ninety hours a week, paying for your crystal glasses and spa weekends?"
"Living this farce of a marriage! If you worry about your money you should have just said so. Unlike you I have a college degree and I could support myself without your money just fine. "
"Is there something you wanted actually say or is this just another episode of 'I want a divorce... uhm, on second thought - No I don 't.' ? "
" I don't wanna be unhappy anymore. And I still care you enough to not wanting to see you unhappy."
"Are you crying?"
"Shut up."
"My, my. Don't tell me the heart of the ice queen is melting."
"Spare me you're sarcasm! Who do you think made me cynical bitter woman I am today?"
"You think this makes me happy?"
"No, but that' s exactly what I m talking about ... God, do you remember how much in love we were?"
"Maybe we would have been happier if we hadn't been so much in love."
"Maybe."

They had both started at the ceiling for what seemed like forever.

"It s really over, isn' t it, Blair? "
"It is."

When she fell asleep he had wrapped his arm around her. Knowing that this would probably be the last night they shared together in this bed. Sadly the idea of it didn 't hurt as much as it should.

---

Blair studied her image in the mirror intensely. Searching if the old Blair Waldorf was still somewhere in there. The reflection showed her the same curvy lips, the same deep brown eyes, maybe with a few more worry lines than there used to be. Yet something was different. Maybe it really just was the obvious lack of hair that changed her face, although Blair thought there still was something else.

Looking at her bald self was still awkward to her on so many levels. It depended very much on her daily mood, but sometimes she wanted to cover up all the mirrors around her apartment, so she wouldn't have to look at her damaged self. And that not just since yesterday, but ever since the surgery.

Her make-up, though, was more perfect these days than it ever had been. It was something she had read in the info brochures from her doctors office. Make-up was one way to deal with the growing feeling of not being feminine. She had of course chosen colors that were softly matching her head scarf.

Chuck's scarf.

She couldn't help but the corners of her mouth softly going up at that thought. Who knew Chuck Bass still had it in him? She most certainly had forgotten it. And maybe he had as well.

"Blair? Are you up there?" Serena's voice sounded from downstairs. "Are you ready to go?"

Sighing Blair straightened her shoulders. Ready? Never really.

"Could you maybe come up here for a second, S?" she called back. "I need your help with something."

Blair took a deep breathe as she heard agile footsteps coming up the stairs. Her best friend hadn't seen her bald yet. And she didn't have much of a choice to prepare her for the sight. The yesterday had gone by in such a rush, that all she had done after Chuck had brought her home, was fall in to bed exhausted.

When Serena appeared in the door frame, Blair could feel herself holding her breathe, waiting for a reaction.

She sincerely hoped her friend wouldn't burst into tears, like the first time she'd seen her chest, post-surgery. If her best friend would start crying she wouldn't be able to stop herself and she refused to leave the house with her eyes all red and puffy.

She could see that the blonde was clearly surprised, if not shocked to see her like this. She'd stopped in her tracks and was clutching the door knob so tightly her knuckles were turning white.

A visible deep inhale later her face relaxed, showing an almost playful expression.

"Bold choice in hair do, B."

Blair felt herself relaxing as well, "Bold? Seriously, when did pun become funny again? Did I miss something?"

Serena just laughed stepping towards her friend, stopping behind her sitting figure in front of the mirror.

"What do you need my help with?"

Blair opened the upper drawer of her vanity, pulling out her favorite new cloth.

"I need help with my head covering. I could probably do it myself, but it just takes me forever," she explained, pretending not to notice her friends stunned face as she handed her the cloth.

Serena run the silken scarf through her hands, her blue eyes piercing into her friend's brown, "Is this what I think it is?"

"Yes. Chuck gave it to me," Blair tried her best to keep her tone as nonchalant as possible. "Yesterday, when we were at my hair studio."

"Woh!", Serena's eyes widened. "You were there with him?"

The other woman just shrugged, "Yeah, right after we visited Jenny in the hospital."

Blair choose to better not tell her friend about the minor meltdown she had between those two incidents. Serena would hear about it soon enough from Jenny or Nate.

"You went to see Jenny and the baby. Together?"

"It's not against the law, now is it?" Blair didn't know why she had the feeling of being busted, but she couldn't seem to shake it off.

"Depends... did you ever file that restraining order?"

"Were are you going with this, S?" Blair asked slightly annoyed. "You are the one who set that ball rolling! What did you expect to happen when you went to him and told him everything?"

"Well, certainly not that the both of you would go back to playing the happy married couple," Serena said.

"We're not playing happy married couple!" she defended. "He's just being a good..."

She stopped in her tracks right there. What was Chuck? A good friend? God, knew it was way more than that and Serena knew it as well. What was he then? What were they?

The blond gave her a pointy questioning look, while she began to adjust the scarf around her friends head.

"He's a good... ex-husband?!" Blair offered uncertain.

"You better watch out for yourself, B," Serena advised as she frapped the scarf in a bow tie.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that you can't just jump ten years back in time and act like nothing bad ever happened between you guys. You were at each others throats. Literally."

"I'm not pretending anything because there is nothing going on between us. Nothing happened."

"Blair." Serena's look was strict, clearly not buying a word her friend said.

"Yeah okay, not much happened."

The blonde immediately pulled a chair up sitting vis-â-vi her friend. "Spill!"

Blair turned away uncomfortable, checking her make-up for the fifth time. "What should I tell you? Why would you even wanna know? Don't you and Humphrey get enough action?"

"Just tell me before I burst out of curiosity!"

Blair um and erred for a moment, before she started talking in a low voice, "Well something second... third base-ish. It was very intimate."

She could feel herself blushing, quickly scattering some more powder over her reddened cheeks.

"You still love him." It wasn't as much a question as a statement, coming Serena.

"I have other things on my mind right now," Blair returned.

"You didn't answer me."

"With your quick wit it's a shame you never made it to Brown," Blair stood up walking towards the door. "Come on. I have some wig shopping to do."

---

Chuck was sure he had his first minor stroke that moment. The glass in his hand dangerously shaking before he cut put it back to the table. Blair had just walked in – new blonde wig on – arms linked with Serena.

For a moment hoped she wouldn't see him, maybe if he hit behind a menu or the waiter would lead them to a table in the other end of the restaurant. But of course he, being Chuck Bass, didn't have such luck.

Both women spotted him almost immediately and apparently didn't even consider not sitting with him. At least that was what he could say for Serena, who seemed to practically dragging Blair along.

"Chuck!", the blonde bundle of energy had sat – herself and Blair – down, before he could do as much as greet them.

His ex-wife gave him a apologetic look, for intriduding as they did.

"Hey Chuck," she greeted him a smile on her lips.

He on the other hand was to stressed out with their sudden appereance to respond with more than a quick nod.

"So what do you think?" Serena wanted to know, gesturing to her friends new hair do. "Doesn't she look stunning?"

Chuck actually forced himself to take a deep breathe, before studying Blair who was nervously picking the edges of her wig nervously.

"Personally I prefer brunette, but aside from that you of course look as gorgeous as ever."

The former couple shared a smile across the table and for the first time Chuck had actually the feeling she believed him. But as harmonic as this scenery was, if he wanted to keep it this way he had to get both women out of here. Right now.

"Listen guys, I really don't wanna be rude or anything--," he started out.

"You're busy!" Blair concluded immediatley, moving her chair back to stand. "Of course! We'll leave you alone!"

If his ass hadn't been on the line the way it was, he maybe would have been assaulted because she couldn't get out of here fast enough.

Serena on the other hand seemed to smell his fear just like a dog. At the suspicious look on her face he honestly wouldn't have been surprised if her ears had cocked up.

"Business meeting, Chuck?" she asked, clearly enjoying to see him struggle like he did, not showing the slightest intention to leave any time soon.

He shot his sister a death glare, that basically screamed Get her out of here!. And even though Serena didn't react the slightest bit to it, Blair had already stood up and dragged her friend along.

"Oh dear, I leave for a second to powder my nose and you have already found yourself new girlfriends!"

There are moments, like right before a vase shatters on the tiled ground, or right before the own car crashes into another and you know something bad is going to happen but it's not in your power anymore to stop it.

And right then, when a tall blonde figure – Valerie - stepped to the table Chuck knew he was screwed. It all seemed to happen in slow motion. Serena and Blair looking up. Recognizing. Blair's eyes slowly wandering back to him.

"What is she doing here?" Blair's voice was as sharp as a razor blade.

"I beg you pardon. Who are you?" The blonde had put a hand to her hip looking really belligerent.

"Blair, I can explain," Chuck started out.

"I'm such an idiot," she muttered, more to herself while gathering her handbag.

"Blair?" Valerie tuned herself in, now realizing who the woman, sitting in her spot, was. "Wow, really didn't recognize you there. What's with the wig? Started chemo already?"

"Shut it, Val!" Chuck almost yelled. He was desperate to explain all of this to Blair but he couldn't do it with Valerie right here.

"What? You told me yourself about the breast cancer tragedy. Last week when we were at you apartment," Valerie said with a sugar-sweet smile.

If she'd been a guy, Chuck would knocked her to the floor for sure. The woman might have not been the greatest light, but what she lacked in brains she made up in spitefullness.

"Last week, hm?" Blair had looked from her former rival back to Chuck, tears shimmering in her eyes.

The blonde just nodded with a triumphal smile on her face.

"I gotta get out of here." Blair jumped in such a haste for a moment Chuck thought her chair was gonna fall backwards to the ground.

She was halfway outside the door, Serena in tow, before he found the guts to walk after her.

They were already outside on the street when he caught up with the two women.

"Blair wait!" He'd enclosed her wrist in his hand, which she jerked off like a disgusting insect.

Serena already stepped between them, "Leave her alone."

Ignoring his step sister he passed her by getting a hold of both of Blair hands.

"This isn't what it looks like," he told her, desperate for her to listen to him.

Blair didn't even bother to look him in the eye. "Yeah, I think we had that conversation before."

"This isn't like before," he tried again.

"You're right. Two weeks ago I would've never let you take me by surprise like this. Because then I still knew that you are a lying, no good, cheating bastard! I should've known that the way I am now, I could never be enough for you. I was a fool thinking that after yesterday-- that it would be-- that we—"

Chuck saw she had to keep herself from crying and, damn, he could strangle himself for causing her that much pain. Once again.

"Don't contact me again," she said before disappearing into the waiting car.

To be continued.

AN: So, what did you guys think? Was it worth the wait?