Summary: Just divorced, Chuck thinks that all is said between him and Blair. But why does she show up at his doorstep at night? Future fic.
AN: A big thank you to all of you out there who reviewed, put me on alert or their favorites list. It makes my day every single time! Hope you enjoy this chapter as well.
Special thanks to Sandra, who's really starting to become my co-author on some level *kisses*, and Britt for beta-ing and making my jabbering readable and understandable!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Way Back Into Love
Chapter 10: Excruciating Pleasure
"I can't believe how stupid I was...", Blair whispered as she stared out of the window, watching the traffic passing by.
"I'm really sorry, B. I tried to warn you. He's still Chuck," the blonde said, putting an arm comfortingly around her friend.
Blair shook her head slightly, "He was so different those last days. I remembered why I fell in love with him in the first place."
"It's not like he was all that trustworthy back then," Serena pointed out.
"Don't act like you know him!" Blair snapped at her best friend.
"You're defending him," Serena stated dryly.
"I know. But I don't know why."
"No big mystery there," Serena returned. "You still love him."
"It's all your fault anyway," Blair griped. "We were finished with each other, until you walzed in and told him everything about the cancer!"
The blonde rolled her eyes, "Should've seen that coming, shouldn't I have?"
Both women fell silent for a while – letting the just happened event sink in.
"What do you think they were doing there?" Blair could feel all the different horror scenarios rushing to her brain. That bitch apparently knew about the cancer. So, they were probably sitting together making fun of how stupid she was to fall for Chuck again. Between having sex on the toilet of course.
"I don't know. But with Chuck I fear we have to assume the worst."
Blair swallowed her reply, because she realized, once more, she wanted to defend him.
---
"Where have you been?"
"Out."
"All alone?"
"As the matter of fact, no."
"Do I know her?"
"Why? You want a threesome?"
"Who is she, Chuck?"
"A nice girl that isn't to stuck up to give proper head."
"You're disgusting."
"And that coming from the woman who once prided herself on giving the superlative blow job."
"Wonder what might have changed that... Perhaps the fact that you can't get it up without medication"
"If you wouldn't smell like vomit all the time from throwing up after every damn meal, maybe I'd still find you attractive enough to get a boner!"
"Fuck you!"
"She's doing that very well for me, thank you very much."
"..."
"What? No bitchy response?"
"You're punishing me aren't you?"
"Don't be ridiculous. What for?"
"For terminating the pregnancy."
"So what if I am? It was my baby and you didn't even bother to do as much as consult me in your decision."
"It wasn't your decision."
"We keep going around in circles."
"Just make sure you're discrete with that bimbo."
"Of course, darling. Wouldn't want anyone to think we don't have the perfect Stepford marriage!"
---
Chuck remained on the sidewalk looking like a drowned rat while watching the car drive away. Leave it to Chuck Bass to really fuck something up. Oh God, did Blair really believe he was here with his ex-mistress because he didn't find her attractive after the mastectomy? Nothing could have been further away from the truth.
"Well wasn't that a nice meet-and-greet," a sarcastic voice drawled from behind him.
He spotted Valerie who'd left the restaurant as well, smirking slightly as she walked up to him.
"Never in my life have I wanted to hit a woman the way I wanna hit you right now," his fists clenched as the words left his mouth.
"Oh show no restraint. Only making it easier for me to squeeze even more money out of you."
"You better fuck off now Val, or I'll make sure you regret it."
"Actually that is what I was hoping for," she smiled seductively and ran her fingers along his shirt collar.
"Maybe you wanna punish me the way you did last week?"
"After the show you pulled in there, you're lucky I'm not hiring a hit man."
She patted his cheek with a gleeful look, "You still have it bad for her, don't you?"
His jaw's clenched visibly as he slapped her hand away.
"It's too bad she'll never know what you just did for her. Poor Chuck - paid a half a million so I'll keep her and all the cancer tragedy out of the tabloid press, and still you come off as the bad guy."
"Just get lost."
"Always a pleasure doing business with you, darling," with those words she walked off, leaving Chuck behind, who for once in his life didn't knew what to do next.
---
"You sure this is all right?" Blair asked once again as she stepped into the apartment.
"I told you," Serena repeated like a mantra, "Dan's at work for at least three more hours, so we'll be by ourselves."
Blair let herself fall onto the couch with a sigh, adjusting her wig. "This thing itches. You would think that for eight hundred dollars, you'd get something a little bit more comfortable."
"So take it off," Serena suggested while setting two coffee mugs on the table.
"Beauty is pain. That goes for wigs as it goes for shoes. Besides, I wanna spare you the sight."
"It's just me, B. I've seen you in way worse states."
"Well, you did help me with the bandages every day," Blair replied, still fidgeting with the fake hair.
"That's not what I meant, and you know it!" The blonde sat down next to her friend.
"Whatever."
The noise of the opening elevator let Serena forget her reply. She and Blair both turned around. Chuck stepped into the room, looking – Blair couldn't think of another expression to describe him – devastated.
Before either, Chuck or Blair, could say a word Serena had already stepped towards him in a clearly aggressive way.
"What do you think you're doing here?"
He spoke emphatically to his step-sister, "Serena please stay out of this. It's none of your business."
"This is, however, my apartment. So if I tell you to leave, you better do so."
"You should think about who got your humble husband the job to pay for your apartment," Chuck spat back.
"You better not be threatening me, Chuck Bass," her voice was completely calm, but in the way she raised her chin and looked at him challenging, Blair could see that she was ready to kill.
Blair plucked up the courage and stepped between them before it could actually come to physical violence.
"Serena, would you let me talk to Chuck alone for just one minute?"
When the blonde gave her the mandatory Are you sure?-eyes, Blair just nodded before turning to her ex-husband.
As soon as Serena was out of earshot or at least sight, Chuck got ready to talk, but she managed to stop him with a simple raise of her hand.
"This time you're gonna listen," she said, wondering to herself where the whiny girl from before had gone.
"But if you would just let me explain--"
"No," she interrupted him mid sentence. "I think it's time you let me explain."
His shoulder's slumped forward as he waited for her to start speaking again.
"I'm sure …," she realized her voice was back to being shaky so she cleared her throat. "I'm sure you have a perfect good explanation as to why you were there with her." The last word she practically spat . "And if I let you explain, I'd understand, I'd forgive you and we'd be back to … well whatever those last couple of days were."
Chuck didn't move a muscle, just waited patiently for her to go on.
"But the truth is Chuck, right now I just can't deal with all of the unfinished business between us. I can't have a fight with you every other day and fight the cancer at the same time. I can't have chemo if I have to worry about her just showing up at your side like that."
"That's never going to happen again--," he tried once more to explain himself but she wouldn't let him.
"It doesn't matter. Somewhere a while ago I forgot how to trust you." She had to take a deep breathe before she could go on talking, "So please Chuck, if you want me to go on with the treatment, you've got to leave me alone... At least for now."
She looked to the floor, unable to meet his eyes. "And maybe in the future..." If I have a future.
"I suppose there could be some excruciating pleasure about that," he replied - the words she had said so long ago - with a sad smile on his lips.
He kissed her forehead tenderly before turning around and leaving with the elevator.
As the door closed behind him, she let the tears she had been holding back freely run over her cheeks and a heart melting sob escaped her lips. Serena was at her side just a second later, wrapping her arms around her, holding her firmly, letting her best friends tears soak her sweater.
To be continued
AN: Reviews are as always really appreciated.