Chapter 9: Apologies, 'Apparently's and Sickly Love

Over the next month, Harry got more and more frustrated. He had taken to walking down to Hagrid's hut after classes to complete his homework so he wouldn't run into the other three in the common room or the library. Harry was growing increasingly annoyed with this way of living, especially when they had to suffer through shared classes in a pained silence.

Hermione had begun to spend more of her time with Malfoy. They completed their homework together in a secluded corner of the library so that nobody noticed them and communicated through Draco's owl.

Ron and Ginny had taken to spending their evenings together. Ron had little choice without making the fatal decision between Harry and Hermione, and Ginny was doing her best to stay away from Blaise as she could see that their bickering was all down to Draco and Blaise's smarmy attempts to break up the trio. Ginny fully blamed them for the resulting tension and had vowed to ignore any attempts Blaise made to talk to her. Of course this was easier said than done. The Slytherin seemed to hold an alarming amount of control over Ginny. A single look made her want to abandon her friends and her beliefs to join him. Every time they unwittingly crossed paths in the corridors, Ginny wanted nothing more than to turn around and follow Blaise blindly wherever he may lead her. Her friendships were beginning to suffer as Ginny tended to ignore her friends knowing that any time she spent with Blaise could be so much more exciting and interesting. She was becoming increasingly sick of her own thoughts as they seemingly did nothing more than simper over the Slytherin that she was pining for.

"Harry." Ginny pushed her way through the crowds coming out of her reverie and following the black hair that she had recognised instantly. "Harry!" Ginny caught up and grabbed his shoulder. "Harry." She breathed. "I need to talk to you." Grabbing his hand, Ginny pulled him through the crowded corridor and out into the courtyard.

"What is it?" Harry asked.

"I realised how stupid I was being. It's been long enough and I can't really remember why I was angry with you in the first place."

"So this is an apology?"

"Yes, I'm so sorry. Do you think we could go back to normal?" Ginny pleaded her eyes wide. Harry grinned, he had never been mad at Ginny and had been cursing himself every day since he let her walk away in anger.

"Of course. Now can we go and have lunch, I'm starving, I've been eating at Hagrid's far too often to be healthy."

Hand in hand they left the courtyard. Ginny spotted Blaise walking towards them down the corridor. She averted her eyes and kept on walking moving slightly closer to Harry ignoring the fire that leapt in her chest when she caught sight of the Slytherin. She was annoyed with herself that at one glance every thought she had had about him came rushing to the forefront of her mind.

Upon reaching the great hall, the couple placed themselves opposite Ron, who didn't look up. "Hey, Ginny." He mumbled, concentrating on the plate in front of him. Harry coughed pointedly and Ron looked up, startled. "Harry! What...I...oh. Mate, look I'm sorry I just didn't want to make the situation worse so I stayed out of it."

"It's fine." Harry waved his hand, brushing off the apology, it was time to forgive and forget. Reaching for food across the table the three lapsed back into the usual routine of joking and laughing. It was so natural and normal that it wasn't until Ginny, whose mind was still plagued with images of Blaise, mentioned that perhaps they should look for Hermione, neither of the boys had remembered that she was missing.

Harry looked guiltily at Ron. "Where would she be?"

Ron shrugged his answer, trying to avoid looking anyone in the eye. "The library?"

"Well it's a good place to start." Ginny answered standing up. Blaise had just entered the hall and she wanted to get out. She had been avoiding him as much as possible lately and her resolve was weaker than ever. She was infinitely glad she didn't have to share any classes with the burly Slytherin or she would be in trouble.

The three Gryffindors stood and left the Great Hall making their way to the library in silence, each caught up in their own thoughts.

Hermione sat peacefully in a corner table in the library completing her homework. Next to her, Draco sat frowning at his own work, using his wand to erase words he was evidently unhappy with. They had happened upon this table once before in their younger years when every other table was full. At that time they had sat in silence, pointedly ignoring each other. Hermione had noticed, however, that in the three hours they spent that evening at the table, not a single other student walked past.

At the present time, Hermione had put up some charms so that anyone who did happen to walk past simply didn't see them, this way it was perfectly reasonable for the pair to sit and work together without anybody seeing them with their heads together and no wands drawn. The only flaw in this plan was that the charm didn't keep out people who were looking for them. Draco was okay as Crabbe and Goyle avoided the library as a general rule and Theo and Blaise knew and accepted Hermione and what they were doing together and tried to keep out of the way as much as possible. On the other hand, Hermione was petrified that one day Harry, Ron or more likely Ginny would realise that they weren't talking to each other for any particular reason and come and find her, however she was using their feud to her best advantage while she could.

Hermione's head snapped up suddenly, her eyes darting around their secluded study area.

"What's wrong?" Draco asked, noticing her panic.

"Listen." Hermione insisted, shaking her head slightly. Draco frowned but conceded. Through the shelves of books, voices drifted towards them.

"I can't see her anywhere."

"Hermione?"

"Keep your voice down, you are in a library Mr. Potter. You too Mr. Weasley."

"She has to be around here somewhere, though. Hermione!"

"Quiet, Miss. Weasley. Once more and all three of you will be kicked out."

"It's them." Hermione whispered in panic. "Go, you have to go." As quietly as possible, the pair shut books and rolled up parchment, shut inkwells and carefully stowed favourite quills, hurriedly stuffing everything into their bags.

"They are too close, I can't get past without them seeing me." Draco hissed, a note of alarm at discovery filtering into his normally calm posture.

"I'll distract them." Hermione grabbed her bag and walked around the corner, feigning surprise when she walked straight into Ron.

"Hermione!" Ginny squealed. Madam Pince rounded the corner her permanent frown deeper than usual.

"Out." She hissed. "All of you. Yes Miss. Granger that means you too." Madam Pince heralded the four Gryffindors out of the library in silence. Hermione tried to look back and see Draco, but he was out of sight already having moved through the maze of shelves, grabbing a book to feign innocence.

When the four Gryffindors were outside the library, Ginny grabbed Hermione in a hug and squealed happily again. "We're so glad we found you. We are so sorry about everything."

"Yeah." Ron added eloquently, shuffling nervously.

"We feel really awful." Harry said.

"You didn't do much for yourselves getting me kicked out of the library." Hermione huffed. "But I guess if you feel truly sorry there isn't much I can do but accept your apology."

Ginny squealed again and threw herself in Hermione's arms. "I'm so happy. This past month has been awful." Ginny linked her arm through Hermione's and together they walked down the corridor, the boys following behind. "I really need to talk to you." Ginny said quietly out of the side of her mouth.

"What about?" Hermione asked.

"I may be having a little trouble saying no."

"That's a little elusive, do you care to elaborate?"

Ginny shook her head and as much as Hermione pleaded, Ginny didn't allow any more information to slip by her lips. Instead she switched to the more trivial dramas of Parvati's fling with Andy Stebbins in fourth year.

It was later in the evening when the two girls were sat on Hermione's bed in the otherwise empty sixth year dorm room that Ginny finally spoke up.

"So I may be missing Blaise. A tiny bit." Ginny said sheepishly.

"He's missing you."

"Really?"

"Draco said that he's been really sulky lately. He did seem rather despondent the couple of times I've spoken to him."

"You've spoken to him?"

"Not often. Just the odd time when he's around when I'm with Draco."

"Oh. So he misses me?"

"Yeah." Hermione nodded. "I don't think he's ever had to work so hard to get someone, just for them to walk away again."

"I couldn't stay with him. I couldn't do that to Harry."

"The same Harry who made you so angry that you didn't speak to him for a month."

"Well..."

"Plus you and Harry always seem to be fighting about something."

"That's not true."

"There was this whole fiasco in which I'm sure you two had no reason to stop talking, it was me he was mad at but before that there was thing about your favourite quill that you were convinced he stole from you. Oh and the fight about quidditch and your issues with his training methods and his issue with you apparently undermining him. And of course there was the whole thing with Hagrid; I can't even pretend to know what that one was about. You two do fight a lot."

"Ok so we fight. Everyone fights. Don't tell me that you two haven't fought yet."

"We haven't." Hermione shrugged. "We just...never seem to fight."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. I did get angry with Pansy once and took it out on him a little bit, but that wasn't really a fight, just misdirected anger."

"You know who did fight, though? Lavender Brown and Jimmy Peaks! I heard the whole thing."

"God that was awful. Isn't Jimmy Peaks in your year?"

"Yeah he is. He was almost crying in Transfiguration. I think he was probably more upset that she had dumped him rather than the other way round instead of being upset that they broke up. I don't think he really liked her, it was more that she was older."

"Yeah I heard." Hermione said. "Lavender wasn't really upset; she said he was rather clingy. Then she vowed never to date younger than herself. It was pretty funny really."

"Oh and mum sent me this clipping from the newspaper, I don't know whether you saw it..."

The time slipped by and the girls settled down into normality.

"You know Hermione; lately you're reminding me of someone." Ginny said looking at her friend with her head tilted to one side.

"Who?" Hermione asked, lazily flipping pages of the Daily Prophet.

"That girl in the muggle book you lent me." Ginny frowning, searching her memory hard. "What was her name? Betty? No Bella that was it, from Twinight or whatever."

Hermione's head snapped up. "What do you mean?"

"The way you look at Draco. All soft, you know? And you spend all of time with him. Plus you never fight apparently." Ginny grinned chuckling quietly at the situation. "That book was really weird, though. Muggles write the funniest things."

"Oh my God."

"I know, weird huh?" Ginny shook her head in amusement, staring back down at the textbook on her lap.

"Oh my God."

Ginny looked up, concerned. "Are you okay, Hermione?"

"Oh my God, I think I'm going to be sick." Hermione jumped up from the bed and ran into the nearby bathroom.

When she returned her face was pale and her hair had been scraped out of the way into a messy bun. A few curls hung down and Hermione leant against the bedpost, her legs weak.

"I think I may be in love with Draco Malfoy."

"Oh my God." Ginny said, disbelief colouring her tone. "No damn way. Impossible. Really?" Hermione nodded, returning to her original position on the bed, drawing her legs up to her chest. "OK, forgive me I'm a little confused. You realise you're in love and that makes you sick?"

Hermione smiled sheepishly. "I just..." She sighed. "It was just a bit of shock that's all. Plus it's Draco. Draco Malfoy. I mean, have you met this guy? Of all the people in Hogwarts, he was not the one I ever imagined myself falling for – the Slytherin prince, the muggleborn hater."

"I guess you wouldn't imagine him as your dream husband."

"I don't what I was thinking getting into this. It was all so exciting and new. He made me feel and I guess I only meant for it to be a fling and now I'm in it at the deep-end with a Slytherin who I still can't fully trust. Plus there are so many things against this ever working and I don't know whether I should just give up now and save the pain or struggle through and cling on to silly hopes that there is somewhere in this stereotypical world where we can be happy.

"Loving him just makes things so much more confusing and those decisions so much harder to make. There is just so much at stake and I hate that. It's like every move I make could mean the end for us and I'll find out that this was all just a fantasy, and that the world really isn't that great. It's a lot to bear and before it didn't matter because I didn't really know what I was doing but now I'm in love with him. Love Ginny! I don't want to be in love with him."

"You don't want to be in love with him?" Ginny asked confused.

"No, I do, I do. Of course I do, these past weeks have been some of the best in my life. I don't really get a choice anyway, I am in love with him. I guess I kind of always presumed that Ron would be the one. Not the bully who's been calling me mudblood for five years."

"Life doesn't always work out the way you expect."

"I guess it doesn't." Hermione sighed. "Not at all."