OMG! I realized that I've made a mistake, thanks to scyterfrnz for pointing it out. Bleh. =_=" I feel so stupid, I accidentally made Mukuro answer Hibari's question. I'm so sorry! O_O
You naughty readers have the most hilarious crack pairings EVAH! XDDDD
Yes, I will try to include all of them, 'cuz they're just that amazing. ;D
There are some pairings I can't do, simply because I didn't put them in the story. ='(
Just seconds after Tsuna requested a threesome with two of the most dangerous man on Earth, Byakuran, Spanner, and Shoichi interrupts them by breaking down the door and yelling, "Hey! Long time no see!" He looked around the room and added, "What was that about a threesome? Wouldn't want to miss that!"
The white haired idiot laughed at his own joke while his subordinates, Shoichi and Spanner, nodded politely to the assassins sitting on the floor.
"What are you doing here?" Squalo snorted, "I don't remember inviting you boobsacs."
"You can't call it a party without alcohol." Spanner said cheerfully with bottles of beer clutched in his hands.
"I'll pass." Hibari said immediately.
"Ushishishi, don't worry, drink all you want, skylark, I don't mind taking care of you after you've thrown up from your nose, sang love songs while striping, and tried to impregnate Tekashi." Bel suggested with a smile bigger than half of his face.
"Impregnating a suicidal baseball player is not on my top ten lists of things to do before I die." Hibari snapped.
"Maybe it's just because your sperm isn't fertile enough to make babies with a man," Squalo argued, and pointed his finger at Takeshi, "I can make babies with him any day of the week."
"You shouldn't be hearing this, Tsuna," Xanxus said as he covers the kid's ears, "I should be the one education you about gay sex, not them." He added with a wink.
"WHAT? What about me?" The sparkly prince wined, "I don't wanna miss out-"
"This is getting way too explicit, please stop talking." Spanner calmly stated.
Bel suddenly snapped his head around and faced the intruder, "Where. Are. Your. Manners. Boy?" He gritted through his teeth, "You. Don't. Cut. A. Prince. Off. When. He's. Trying. To. Hit. On. A. GUY!" And with that, he pulled out several knives out of nowhere, and chased the poor lollipop sucking kid out of the door.
Spanner's screams and cries of pain and agony were heard for a few seconds, then a bloody, "HELP ME!" echoed down the halls of the mansion.
After a few seconds of silence, Bel returned to the room, and sat down like nothing happened.
Byakuran chuckled, "Heh heh, looks like he won't be back for a while."
Another awkward silence went around the room. Looks like they're having a lot of these lately. Hmm...Wonder why?
Futa recovered and randomly said, "I wonder if Tsuna and Mukuro's baby are gonna taste like tuna flavored pineapples."
"Uh...I don't think I'd want to taste a baby." Dino twitched.
"Kufufufu, actually, no. It'd taste like pineapple flavored tuna, well, 'cuz obviously I'd top Tsuna." The pineapple head reminded, and then he added with an evil smile," I mean, who wouldn't be able to top that wimp."
"Hey! That's not true!" The ever so loyal right hand man defended, "Futa, make a list of people who can and who can't top Tenth in bed."
"Alright, you hear that, book?" Futa asked the book, "Now be a good boy and gimme that list."
"Gimme gimme never get, haven't you learned your manners yet?" The book teased.
"...Holy fuck." Shoichi, who has been quite for the last few minutes, exclaimed.
"Tee hee, just kidding."
"I did not just see a talking book." Lussuria's jaws hit the ground.
"I'm not talking; it's just your mind playing tricks."
With that, the Sun Guardian of the Varias ran out of the door screeching like a little girl, with his crazy hair accessories bouncing after him.
"I thought only I could make him scream that hard." Bel mumbled quietly to himself.
"Anyways, let's move on!" Reborn clapped his hands together, totally ignoring what just happened. The answers appeared on the book, right on cue:
"Tsuna's ukes : None. Maybe Basil..."
"What?" Tsuna exclaimed.
"Tsuna's semes: Everyone..."
Everyone laughed. And laughed. And laughed. And laughed.
Byakuran was almost in tears, and Hibari, who hardly showed any emotions, was doubling over and choking on his coke. Even Reborn had a mocking smirk on his face.
When finally, everyone settled down, and forgotten all about the Millefiore's interruption, Tsuna pouted, "I'm sure there are other useless ukes in this room too!"
"Ha! Like who?" Takeshi snickered, "Hibari?"
Futa smirked at his book.
"Hibari's semes: Dino, Mukuro, Xanxus, Takeshi, Belphegor, Squalo, Reborn...and basically everyone except Tsuna."
"Huh? What? NO WAY!" Hibari spat, "XANXUS?"
"Well, isn't that surprising?" Mukuro managed to choke out.
"Yay! I'm at the top of the list!" Dino beamed with a slight nosebleed.
Hibari crawled behind Gokudera, and snuggled against the Storm's back. "You meanies, I'm not playing with you anymore..." He whined childishly.
"Aw, it's ok, kid, I'm sure you can top me if you tried." The bomber teased, then "AGH! OUCH!" when Hibari bit the nape of his neck.
"Stop being immature, Kyoya." The Callavone said with a goofy grin on his face, and suddenly, his face came in contact with his student's knuckles.
"Shut your pie hole, girly man." And with that, Hibari delivered another blow to his stomach.
"Ow! That hurts! Be gentle with me!" Dino begged, "Wait! Stop! I said STOP!"
"Stop? You want me to stop?" The prefect snapped, "How come you never stop in bed when I tell you to? HUH? Now you know how I feel, every, single, fucking, time!"
Everyone stopped talking, and stared at Hibari with their jaws sweeping the floor. Here comes another wave of awkward silence, which was broken by Gokudera...
"Mukuro, can you please take your hands out of my boxers?..."
Thanks for all the reviews! ;D