Now we introduce Torchwood into the mix, and what do you get? Solid humour! I hope XD!
CAROL TWO
"Jack Harkness the big, gay man ball; had a very, very long coat! And if you ever saw it, Tosh'll give you an ice-cream float. Gwen wants an ice-cream float too, but she'll have to kiss Rhys first – Ianto looks shocked by my song – And it's about to get worse!
"Then on December 23, Ianto came to say – Jack you look so hot today – do you want to come and have a play? Gwen started laughing at this, and Jack's gun is aimed at me…"
"RUN, LITTLE OWEN HARPER, OR YOU'LL BECOME HISTORY!" Ianto retorted; finishing Owen's little carol for him, looking grim with the embarrassing lyrics. Jack sprinted to where Owen had stood before, quickly disabling the continuous repeat of the irritating Rudolph-The-Red-Nosed-Reindeer tune – Owen passing Gwen and Tosh, who were repeating Ianto's final line tauntingly. Somewhere amongst this pandemonium, Ianto had slipped out the door…
"Shit! Jack, we're supposed to be in London for Abby's Christmas party! With the people who deal with rifts too!" Tosh cried from the bay – Already she was dressed for the party in a dark plum coloured, 1920s, flapper dress, hair and makeup complete, yet somehow she had forgotten the most exciting social event of the year. It was half past 1, and they were due in half an hour.
"Jack and Ianto are getting changed, Tosh. Probably doing a bit more than that but who is sick enough to interrupt that?" Gwen laughed and placed her latest gun on to the wall.
"So, Mr Harper, will you go to the party as my date?" Tosh batted her fake eyelashes daintily, teasing Owen – He couldn't resist her.
"It would be a pleasure, Miss Sato – Why not? By the way, you look absolutely stunning." Owen held her around the waist and planted a gentle kiss on her lips, dipping her slowly. As he stood up straight again, he sighed, "I've wanted to do that for a long time." Tosh laughed shyly.
"I've fantasised about that for a long time." She breathed, whispering into his ear.
"Well, took you about time, Owen. Finally grew some bloody balls! Come on, the transmitter will only work for so long. Let's get going!" Jack's loud, American drawl ripped itself from the speakers, and although he didn't himself, the voice was laughing, joking around.
Rhys, Gwen, Owen, Tosh, Jack and (A rather satisfied) Ianto crowded around Jack's arm, the transmitter at the ready.
"Okay, everybody hold on, let go and you're toast. Yeah, everyone on? Let's go!" Jack warned. He pressed three of the stiff buttons on the old machine. There was a flash of green, and then they were standing in the middle of the ARC, stunned.