Hour 10: Slaying the Dream

Holly Morgan was afraid. She'd entered the Program in a state and it had taken several hours for her to finally calm down, but things had hardly improved for her. Not knowing quite what to do or where to go, she'd found herself wandering west of the school. Looking at the map, that area seemed to contain lots of places where she could hide for a while.

Unfortunately, it seemed that several people had had the same idea. She was now near the western coast of the island, circling around the outside of a forested area, the leaves of which glistened white in the early morning sun. She kept a wary eye on the forest, using the trees as cover but not venturing too far in, having recently heard gunfire. Whoever caused it couldn't have been too far away, and was potentially hiding in amongst the trees, while she was completely unarmed.

In fact, if anything, she was worse off than them because unlike the other students who had gotten unlucky in the draw, they probably didn't know it. Holly did. Her "weapon" was a list of what everyone else got, though of course names were missing. Knives, guns, grenades, even a rocket launcher. The atomic bomb had to have been a sick joke, but everything else was presumably real.

Holly just had to hope that her social status would help her out. Aside from being the daughter of a staff member (which was true of others in the school, including in her own year up until the start of S6), she'd cultivated a reputation for being endlessly effervescent, and people liked that. In fact, there were very few people who didn't like her.

Granted, that was a position she'd deliberately put herself in; while she was in no way a scheming backstabber like some of her peers, she knew how to manipulate social situations in her favour when necessary. Holly was one of those people of whom one's first impression was almost always positive and required to be disproved before people had a problem with her. It meant that she could get away with a lot that she might otherwise not be able to, though she wasn't generally interested in exploiting that. Still, it was always nice to have the option.

Whether or not it would do her any good on Caphraig, however, remained to be seen. Holly was too much of a modern woman to adopt the stereotypical "damsel in distress" role, ever, but being a small, physically weak girl with no weapon in a situation like this, she knew it would be hard to avoid it if she got into trouble. Having lots of friends wasn't a lot of help when you didn't know where any of them were, especially when the only people you had seen were fighting each other.

Wait, who is that? Is it…oh no. I'm really not in the mood right now for…yep, it's him. Holly thought about bolting into the trees, but the figure charging in her direction had seen her and the last thing she wanted was to be chased through a forest that for all she knew still had a crazed gunman hiding in it. Her relationship with Adam Lewis was friendly but slightly awkward. Aside from being quite weak socially anyway, he was wont to use her as a scapegoat for his political aims.

The pair were the school captains, deputised by Kim Magdalene (who was a close friend to each of them), and Olly King, but in practice Holly and Olly handled all student relations while Adam and Kim did everything that involved annoying staff members. If they, meaning Adam and his best friend Scott Irving really, needed emotional blackmail, then he took to waving Holly and other relatives of faculty members about like a flag. It got results but was slightly demeaning. Then there was his long term, in-no-way-secret crush on her. She wanted to at last tell him it was never going to happen between them, though she didn't have the heart to crush him like that, nor would she take Anna Wilson up on her repeated offers to do it for her. She hoped he wouldn't stick around long for now anyway.

As he ran towards her, knowing that this time he'd picked correctly from two red dots in the area on his GPS, Adam tried to control himself. He'd faked a nervous breakdown in front of Jenna Widdowson, but knew that it was only a matter of time before the real thing came along. Without his friends, particularly Scott and Kim, his psychological weaknesses were going unchecked and that put him in danger. Relief as much as anything else coursed through him. This is it you are here you are going to do this at last at last no matter what else happens it will be DONE! Adam laughed giddily to himself, before realising that he was now stood directly in front of the girl for whom he'd been searching for so long. Longer than the Program had lasted thus far anyway, though he had no idea how much time had passed. Years of terrified postponement and delay were now over.

Holly didn't know what his problem was, but it was clear that he had issues of some kind and that she wanted nothing to do with them. He needed professional help that she was in no position to give. She wanted to become a therapist, but for speech!

"Hi, how are you, erm, how are you doing?" Holly tried to look relaxed, though in reality was trying to gauge a viable escape route. Adam looked preoccupied and didn't seem to notice.

"I've-I've been better, but then we are as turkeys in Bernard Matthews' car so perhaps we'd all say that unless madness has already claimed us or survival seems within our easy grasp." There was something not quite right about him as he waved his sword in front of him. He didn't seem too threatening…yet…but there was something unnerving about him generally right now.

"That your weapon?" she said, gesturing to the sword.

"No no no this was an ill-gotten prize, Judas' silver if truth be told, taken from a grieving Goth who may be seeking its return as we speak. She has promised me my due reward when she gets it back though I fear her not having it is more pressing an issue than my having it. If ever you should meet fear her flee her for Hell hath no fury like Jenna scorned of that I can assure you!

"No my gift from those guiding us into the afterlife was a device that lets me track others doing likewise which has now seen fit to show me to you in your grace, when two targets did appear to which to go and I chose wisely, though whether designed or not I cannot know. My destiny I thought were clearer WHY AM I NOW SO LOST WHEN HERE YOU ARE?" Adam was shouting, but not at Holly. What he was babbling about made little sense, though he seemed to be suggesting he'd attacked Jenna. There was blood on the sword…

"Adam, did you…have you killed her?" She had to know, even as her need and desire to run as far and fast from him as possible increased.

"Killed her trust perhaps though the girl yet lives, though I know not if through choice or necessity…she was right about so much, had I time I could consider it but when forced to choose I had to keep with the course I thought was right, even if perhaps it never was. I am not well, but have always felt as though on a certain path in life, one which is only now partially revealing itself…I think I wish I didn't know any of it so I would not be tormented so.

"Do not fear the blade, it can hurt but me not you – only should you misuse it may it penetrate your flesh. Though lacking the scabbard I must display it always, such is the reason you see it before you now." If Adam was trying to either explain himself or reassure Holly then he was failing. She instinctively looked behind her, startling him.

"Please don't go! I-I mean you no harm, though in my present state you could easily be forgiven for thinking otherwise." He threw the katana to the ground in front of her and put his hands in the air. That was welcome but unexpected. What was he doing?

"I appreciate you trying to tell me you don't want to kill me, but you're saying you were looking for me? Can I ask why?" Another question to which she didn't want the answer, but it was probably the only way to get him away from her – straight to the point, then he could leave.

"Is it now? Yes, the flame awaits you and your descent into it has been delayed long enough. Your path is clear ignore all else. Destiny. Your legacy."

"Are you…still talking to me?"

"Wasn't then, am now. Holly I don't know how to say this so must focus myself enough to just do so. I'm in love with you, have been for years. It's why I've been so awkward around you and your friends, because I've felt this way but been afraid to tell you! God you mean so much to me I'd do anything for you! I…I don't know how much time I have left, my mind is fading I can feel it. I can't make sense of what's real anymore, I thought I could but I killed Zoey and now all I can see is the end, one way or the other…"

"Adam stop! Please!" Holly felt suddenly lightheaded. Was that really what this was all about? He'd gone through all this, for her. It was madness, and she had to keep her wits about her since he clearly wasn't. "I'm worried about you, you need help so please, try to calm down!"

"Truthfully it's not 'worry' I wish you to feel about me at this moment. Long have I dreamed of the moment when I would finally tell you everything, and now I have! I had to, before my inevitable purification."

Holly didn't have much time to consider a response, if indeed any at all. Adam was unpredictable right now, and the more she delayed and considered the more danger she would put herself in. She had no choice but to say the first thing that came into her head. She readied herself to flee.

"Adam, I'm, I'm not completely sure how to say this. I need you to know it's not easy for me, we're friends and I do care and worry about you." She was lying really, they were only friends for a very broad definition of the word, and she was worrying for herself. "But I'm not in love with you. I just don't see you that way I'm afraid, I've got a boyfriend and he's the only person I have those kind of feelings for. I'm really sorry, but I can't help it. Love never can be helped, however it happens."

Holly took a deep breath as she waited for Adam to respond. He looked at her quizzically, then at himself. "I…what? But – no! Can't." He was moving his mouth awkwardly, squirming, as if struggling to speak. "Inevitable…had to be, no other outcome…rejection only. Hope…gone." His mouth opened widely, held for several seconds, closed, and repeated the process several times. He looked at her forlornly.

"Must scream…can't…no mouth! It's over, everything disappearing…I'm falling oh God catch me stop me help me save me! This is real this is real! I'm not faking this time, please DO SOMETHING!" He was bending over backwards, but seemed to think he was falling from a great height. There was nothing Holly could do for him now, and she started to back away. With that, he threw himself up and forward, appearing again in front of her in an instant, sword held aggressively in his hand.

"Hold! Move no further; remain where you are. I cannot have you escape me." Holly's worst fears were coming true; she'd rejected Adam as gently as possible, and now he was going to…she couldn't even think the words. All she knew was that she had no way to resist or stop him.

"Please don't-"

"Your words are not relevant. I have fallen into the chasm and been told it is not time yet. Thus I have risen again! If I cannot be with you, I can still protect you! You have no weapon, but I will serve as one for you, this blade being an extension of my undead fury against any who dare oppose you!" So, his intentions weren't what Holly feared they might be. That was a relief, but this was still insane. Undead?

"But what about your friends? They must be looking for you, remember, 'The Legacy of the Anti-Clique'? You have to seal it!" This was probably Holly's last realistic way of getting rid of him, so even though he apparently wasn't letting her speak, it was worth a shot.

"And I will, because I'm holding The Blade of the Anti-Clique – it's in my hands now! That's what the goth could never realise, it's mine by divine right! And what you fail to realise is that you are the Legacy! The others can do what they want, you're the one I want to save."

Holly's face now showed resignation. The boy was hopelessly, insanely dedicated to no one but her, and without a means of defending herself she couldn't risk making him angry by forcing him away. She had to admit, a bodyguard was useful in a situation like this, but the whole thing was so disturbing that she still thought she felt less scared before he turned up. Her thoughts were interrupted however by the sound of what appeared to be movement, on noticing which Holly remembered something Adam had mentioned earlier to her.

"May I ask you something?" Be polite and non-threatening and he won't object, surely he can't?

"I live to serve you, provided you accept and do not act to prevent that you are in charge."

"Your…device, thing, you said it can guide you to people? Do you know how it works? Just that, you said you chose to find me when there was someone else you could have gone to. Who was it?" Alarm struck Adam as she said the words. He seemed to understand, glancing at the tracker with horror before standing directly in front of Holly, using his body to cover hers.

"I fear we are not alone. He whom I did not intercept may soon be upon us." He sighed. "You fear me. I am not the best of men, a traitor to all whom I come across. Yet I will protect you with my life, which cannot be guaranteed of whoever else might be present in this area. Pray that I am the greater of two evils, for it means you are in no danger."

Holly didn't know what she wanted or expected to happen. Her heart further sank when the other dot on Adam's tracker made himself known.

Ian Doherty had been watching the school captains from with interest from a distance. It was a curious sight really; the resourceful, popular, and most importantly hot Holly at the mercy of a mad freak. He was enjoying what he was seeing. This was the perfect opportunity for him to make a name for himself – the head boy and girl, dead by the hand of poor defenceless puny little Ian. This is how he would make people fear him – they'd have to, otherwise he'd kill them too! Now, don't hold back!

"Adam, Holly! Good to see you! Enjoying the fun and games, are we?" Ian was actually shaking, but he was forcing himself to act confidently. He had a gun, they didn't, so he could take his time in readying himself anyway.

"Ian, this is neither the time nor the place. My blade exists only to defend, there is nothing to gain from an attack." Holly was past assuming Adam would react appropriately to being held at gunpoint. Instinctively, she'd put her hands up.

"Have you not noticed what I'm pointing at you? Can't you see it?"

"By relieving myself of the burden of conscious thought I see more than you know. Including the fact that we're both dead men, you sooner than me if you choose to stay where you are." Adam's hands were also in the air, but he was still holding the katana.

Adam was starting to annoy Ian; he should have been acting like a hostage, begging for his life. Instead it almost seemed like he was threatening him! Another thought occurred though. Holly was unarmed, therefore defenceless, as well as scared and physically little stronger than Ian. If Adam wasn't there, Ian could exploit the situation to his own advantage.

Naturally, Ian was a virgin, and hadn't actually been kissed. Nobody wanted to, and he'd asked almost everyone in the school at one time or another. Forcing it on someone was normally illegal, so he couldn't do that. Here, though, he'd been explicitly told that nothing was illegal – normal laws didn't apply in the Program. That meant he could do anything he wanted to Holly and there would be nothing wrong with it! Yes…he could try all sorts of things, stuff he'd only thought about or seen on the internet. And she couldn't stop him because if she did then he could torture her by shooting her in the leg or something. And when he was done, he could just kill her and have people fear him for killing someone so popular like he'd originally planned. It made perfect sense. Adam's body would be a bit of a turnoff though. Was it worth the trade-off? Letting Adam live so he could fuck Holly? Yes, of course it was. Excitement coursed through his body; he was finally going to see a naked girl!

"Listen Adam, I don't have any issue with you. Well, okay, I do, but I'm willing to let that go and give you a choice. If you walk away and go find your friends so that I can talk to Holly on my own for a bit, I won't stop you. You can live! Really! If you say no I kinda have to kill you, so it's best that you do it."

"Holly, I don't like where this is going. He doesn't have it in him to do any more than kill you but I'll die before I see it happen."

"That can be arranged, you know!"

"Run, save yourself!"

"Move one step and I'll kill you both! I-I-I'm not joking now, stay there! Adam, last chance." Ian had circled around slightly but Adam followed, denying him a clear shot at Holly. Ian was himself now scared. He didn't want to admit it but Adam was right; he almost certainly didn't have it in him to enjoy Holly the way he wanted to. He was desperate to, but girls were so alien and enigmatic to him that he wouldn't know what to do or how. The screaming would be a bit off-putting too, and he probably wasn't charming enough to persuade her not to do so. He could still kill her though! He just needed his moment, and a little more courage. Why wasn't Adam backing down? It didn't make sense!

"Correction, it's your last chance. I see choices in the air numbering two – Holly's freedom or your demise. I am a traitor and a murderer, but in this instance will stay my sword and spare you to be slain by another less merciful should you choose the former. Either way, that innocent girl will remain as such. So FUCK. OFF. Leave with your worthless life." Adam's hand gripped his katana tightly, now holding it in front of him rather than above. He could sense Ian's weakness. Protect her…it is all I can do it is the only reason I still breathe I am undead for that purpose alone! This mortal beast will not slay her while I still draw breath!

Holly was all but paralysed; caught between a madman who was obsessed with her and a gunman desperate to kill her…or worse. If she tried to run then either of them might turn on her, but without a weapon what could she do but stand there? So much for never being the damsel in distress.

"How many times do I have to warn you Adam, you run or you die!" The gun was raised threateningly, but Ian was shaking violently; his finger could barely stay on the trigger. He was trying to pull it but, as before, his nerve was failing him. He desperately wanted Adam to die so he could figure out what to do with Holly, but somehow it wasn't happening.

"That's it, you've had your chance! Holly, get down, NOW!"

From nowhere Adam charged, going in an instant from an aggressively defensive stance to almost flying towards Ian, sword outstretched in his hands. Neither Ian nor Holly, who had thrown herself to the floor, could predict or stop the katana as it sliced across Ian's torso.

As he fell backwards, screaming, Ian finally, instinctively, pulled the trigger on his Uzi, meeting Adam's rush with a burst of bullets before dropping the gun. Adam was thrown off balance but could no longer feel pain. He believed himself undead, thus mortal injuries were no obstacle to him. Throwing himself forward, having kept hold of the katana, Adam plunged it deep into Ian's stomach twice, guaranteed Holly's safety by thrusting it into his groin, then further punctured his stomach. Ian let out a gargling scream, but could not continue the fight and was dead within half a minute, Adam holding the blade in place until he stopped breathing.

The moment Ian did so, Adam was overcome with a sudden awareness of the gunshot wounds in his own body, and fell to the floor as he put a hand to the area. Holly rushed to him, her own breathing now erratic as she did her best to overcome her fear.

"Adam say something! Are you alright? God let me help you, take my sweater while I get you some water-"

"Whe-where am I? Holly? Is that you? I must have just woken up, think I've been asleep. Wow…it's clearer now."

"What's clearer?" Holly paused, looking curiously at a boy whose eyes looked completely different from the way they had done mere moments earlier.

"Everything. I feel…lucid, again. Don't quite understand it." The words were punctuated by deep gulping breaths, as he tried to bring himself back to his senses at last. "How did that happen? Wait, what has happened? Why does it hurt?"

"Adam you saved my life, can you not remember?"

"I did? That was nice of me. Wait…I dreamt that I did that! Must have been…vivid dreams, I think I remember most of it. Who did I save you from?"

"Look beside you." He saw sorrow in her eyes as she spoke, and felt overcome by horror as he noticed Ian's body, the katana embedded in it like the sword in a stone. As he realised it was all real, including the gunshot wounds Ian had inflicted upon him, Adam started to cry.

"Can you walk, I think-I think we should go…try and find somewhere safer, someone might have heard the gunfire. Here, I'll help you up!" Holly placed her arm under Adam's shoulder and tried to lift him, but despite his meagre frame it was little use.

"Aaaah! Fuck, that hurts too much. Can't do it…" He'd managed a few steps but no more, Holly catching him as he collapsed. "Guess my walking days are over then."

"What do you mean 'over', I can help you, we can…"

"Holly my mind's a bit of a blur right now, don't know what's going on except that Ian's dead and I'm in a lot of pain right now, but I know there isn't anyone who can help me."

"But if you won't accept help then what are you gonna do?"

"Die, I guess. Can't think of a better option. It's not that I won't accept help, just that there's no one to give it. In the dream…or real life, whichever it was, your dad said no one can help. I'm hurt pretty damn badly here, I do need a doctor right now, and you're not one."

They were each trying to fight back the tears; Holly knew she had to put on a brave face for the boy who had just saved her life, and Adam could see how upset she was and didn't want to make things worse. They both knew, however, that he was right.

"No…you're not going to die, I won't let you! God only knows what Ian was going to try and do, he had a gun and you saved me even though you only had a sword. I'm going to work out how I can help you. We've both got friends here, maybe they could-" Her words were flowing rapidly, but Adam raised a hand to interject.

"You have helped me, Holly. Because I found you like this, I got to fulfil my pledge to you, because I've died protecting you. I didn't want to live anyway, or deserve to. It doesn't matter who pulled the trigger, I killed Zoey, now Ian too, and I betrayed Jenna. Me dying…means they can rest in peace…" Adam had somehow calmed down, but Holly was incredulous.

"Ian? Do you even remember what he tried to do, you said it yourself he was going to….I can't even say it." Why was he upset about Ian of all people? Zoey she could understand, but not him.

"He wasn't going to do anything. He couldn't. He was a sad, lonely little boy living in a dream world. Not so different from me I guess, and soon we'll both be dead." Softly, regretfully, he spoke, though only to Holly did he sound like he genuinely accepted his fate.

"Why do you keep telling me you're going to die?" That he kept saying it was in itself, true or not, upsetting.

"Because I'm afraid, damn it!" Passion returned to his voice once more. "Because I don't know if there's an afterlife and if there is, which side I'll go to. Who am I to say how some hypothetical "God" judges any of us? I stabbed a boy to death, maybe that's enough to send me to Hell. I'm in so much…pain, right now, but maybe this is just the beginning…"

"Well there's got to be something, anything! I owe you my life!"

"You're right, you do. And…there's two things you can do for me, I think. But saving me's not one of them. Too badly hurt for that. Ugh…thought I'd be dead already! Really, I got shot point blank with an Uzi…how…was Ian that bad a shot that he missed all my vitals? Thought that 'don't take a gun to a knife fight' shit was only in films?"

"I don't know, I really don't know, please tell me what to do!"

"You're…not gonna go anywhere are you? I d like you to stay with me. I don't think I'll be that long now…" Seeing Holly almost pleading with him, Adam thought it best just to tell her.

"Okay…you're alive because of me, and only because of me. If I hadn't died for you, you'd have died instead, right?" She nodded. "Well that means I've given you a second chance in life. One you need to take. I'm still alive through you, in you. Please…make my sacrifice worthwhile. Live! For me, for everyone. Will you do that?"

"Of course…I swear, I'll make sure I make it home alive…"

"Thank you, that…that means a lot. The Legacy of the Anti-Clique is yours to determine now. I-I don't know exactly what it is, but I'm sure it's either you or Jenna it's about. I took the sword from her. The Blade of the Anti-Clique. Now I'm giving it to you. Make one dream come true, since you only die twice."

"I'll give you your answers, somehow, some day. You said you had something else?"

"Oh God Jenna, what have I done? Why didn't I listen? Was it…no, surely it couldn't have been! But it doesn't feel like it should, something isn't right. Perhaps we never really know what we have until we burn the bridges that take us away. But anyway, yes, too late for that…my other request. I want you to make my one dream come true, as I die a second time. I want you to…end my pain." Holly's face was a picture of pure horror. Surely he did not mean what she thought he did?

"How, exactly can I do that?"

"By granting me euthanasia. Please…I don't want to die in spite at the hands of someone I never liked, when I could die in mercy at the hands of someone I love…take the blade I bequeathed to you. Take it and release me at last!" His eyes lit up at the prospect. A perfect death, in a perfect way, by the perfect girl. Whatever happened in the afterlife, he could at least get there by means chosen by him.

"No, Adam! You can't! I…how could I? I can't do this!"

"You can't set me free? Holly…this might be the first time I've ever said it, or at least meant it, but I genuinely don't want to emotionally blackmail you here…but I'm suffering. I might last minutes, could be longer. I can't move, I can't do anything about it but wait to die. I'm begging you, please, help me in the only way you can now…"

As she looked deep into his eyes, Holly tried to see past his words, into his mind itself. She saw pain, inside and out. He was right; this wasn't a typical plea for attention or sympathy. It was a dying man begging for mercy. Begging. She wanted to go away and think about things, as they weren't sitting clearly in her head. The last few minutes had all been a blur, with neither she nor Adam thinking completely straight. But when it came to it, it was a yes or no decision. She did it or she didn't. He was dying so she could live. What choice did she have?

Adam fought against the pain to force himself into a kneeling position as Holly pulled the sword from Ian's body, forcing the tears away from her eyes as she did so. Now wasn't the time for that. She couldn't help but display her discomfort, however.

"It's okay, you don't have to look…just be sure and get my neck please, I'd hate to be in even more agony if you miss…" At that she almost ran away. This was no time for those sort of jokes! She felt like an executioner as it was, and nearly asked if he had any last words, stopping herself just in time. He seemed to realise though, and answered the question anyway.

"Just, thank you. Kiss me with the blade. And seal the Anti-Clique's Legacy. Holly…"

As the katana Adam had stolen from Jenna rose into the air, he saw his life flash before his eyes. He recalled meeting his friends in the Anti-Clique, and all the fun times they'd had together. Their protests; the time spent at each other's houses geeking out; helping each other through good times and bad. And the time spent longing after Holly, watching her from afar, hoping for one brief moment she could be with him. And now she would carry him with her always; he would live forever through her as she bestowed one final act of mercy upon his broken body.

With this thought, he raised a smile as he felt the blade approach his neck. That smile was still there as his head fell to the ground. For now, Adam Lewis, Head Boy, most prominent of the Anti-Clique and one of the best known students in the school, had died just 10 hours into the Program while saving the life of the woman he secretly thought he loved. Yet despite it all, he had, ultimately, died happy.

Holly Morgan dropped the sword, fell to the ground, and burst into tears beside the lifeless bodies of Adam Lewis and Ian Doherty. In her grief, she neither noticed nor cared that she was in a white forest, hiding by a hollow tree.