I sat on the steps to my house, puffing on a cigarette. Hannibal was out, dad was at the bar and Emily had left early that morning to go play at her friend's house, so it was just me. I dug the heel of my boot into the dirt as I stared t a rock.
Sighing, I retrieved a severely folded piece of paper from my pocket. After fiddling with it for a few moments I held a birthday card in my hand.
"Happy birthday mum." I murmured to myself as I put my fag out and stood up. She was 40 today, and I smiled to myself as I thought about how thrilled she would be to receive mail. I began walking to the post office to mail it to her asylum.
"Murdoc!" I heard Ache-Face pounding on my door. I had a headache from a night of drinking alone in my Winniebago and I growled.
"Go away Dullard!" I said threateningly. Instead of ceasing, the knocking became more obnoxiously frequent. Swearing, I got up and went to open the door.
"SURPRISE!" three shouts greeted me, making my temple scream in protest. Two dents was grinning with his stupid broken teeth, Russel had a cupcake with a three and a six on it, and Noodle had three brightly wrapped boxes.
"Happy Birthday Murdoc-san!" she said joyfully, brandishing the gifts with great pleasure.
"Thirty-six today Muds!" Russ boomed.
"'Appy Birfday Murdoc!" Dullard agreed. I looked at them all and slammed the door in their faces. Today was my birthday and I had prayed to Satan that they had forgotten, no such luck naturally. I went to my mini-fridge and pulled out a bottle of whiskey.
"'Appy bloody fuckin' birthday Muds," I muttered to myself, taking a large swig. "Cheers." I slurred.