The Search For Something More
Chapter 29 - Truth Doesn't Make a Noise
Thank you all for the reviews and I hope that I surprise you with how the chapter starts and ends lol. I can't say that I didn't smile when I saw all the Julian bashing. We'll see how you feel about him after this chapter lol. I'm sorry for the delay in updating, I was extremely busy with some travels the past few days. I promise to make it up, keep an eye out for something tomorrow or Tuesday, especially if you're a fan of my stories! I hope you enjoy this one and please review.
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"WAIT!"
Everyone whipped their heads around and found Julian running over to them. He hunched over and was slightly out of breath.
Nathan let go of Haley's hands. "What the hell?" Nathan gritted and was about to walk down the stairs but Lucas halted him.
"You can't get married!" Julian said breathlessly.
"Let go Luke, I'm going to kill him." Nathan turned to his brother.
"Nathan, hold up." Haley pleaded. What the hell is Julian doing here? He better have a good explanation for this. Haley thought.
"Yeah hold up." Julian said panting as he started walking forward. "You.. you can't get married .. yet." Julian was a little winded. He made a bee line from the parking lot to get to the gardens at back of the hospital in time.
"Yes Haley-bop, you can't get married yet." Lydia smiled as she appeared from around the corner. "Not at least with out me."
"Mom!" Haley clutched her chest. If she could walk straight, she'd probably run to her mom but she stayed firm at her spot on the make shift alter.
Lydia came walking up as fast as she could and mother and daughter immediately hugged.
"Mom, what're you doing here?"
"I can ask you the same thing." Lydia sniffled. "When I found out what happened, I just had to get back here. There were no flights I could take.. at least no commercial flights." Lydia turned her head to look at Julian. "Julian helped charter a private flight to get us both here from LA."
Everyone turned their eyes to Julian.
"Thank you Julian.. I .. I don't know what to say." Haley said surprised.
"Say you'll marry me instead?" Julian joked but Nathan definitely did not think it was funny and continued to glare at him.
"Kidding." Julian turned to Nathan and put his hands up in mock surrender.
"Haley, it was nothing." Julian spoke up. "I wanted to get back here too and I found out your mom was stuck in LA as well and I pulled some strings through my dad."
"Thank you." Nathan cleared his throat. "Thank you for doing this." Nathan took Haley's hand again.
"Yes Julian, thank you." Haley replied and then turned to her mom. "And thank you for being here."
"Although I could ring your neck for trying to get married with out me." Lydia replied.
"Mom, I'm sorry, it's just.."
"Oh Haley-bob, I'm just teasing. I'm surprised you and Nathan didn't get hitched already." Lydia stepped up and hugged her daughter one more time. "You may not believe it but there was a time when I was young and in love like you. As long as this is what you really want, I couldn't be happier for you."
"It is mom." Haley nodded. Lydia smiled and then turned to Nathan to give him a hug as well.
"Take care of her, Nathan. She's my last one." She padded his back.
"I will Lydia and thanks." Nathan smiled as he pulled back.
"Shall I continue?" The pastor asked.
"Oh yes, by all means." Lydia stepped down and stood next to Karen.
"Umm.. so where were we?" The pastor laughed as did everyone else. "Right, there are a lot of things I can say about Nathan and Haley but instead I choose to listen to the words you have for each other."
Haley took a deep breath. "Nathan, it's been said that there is one word to free us from the weight and pain of life, and that word is love. And I believe that. It doesn't mean that it hasn't been hard, or that it won't be. It just means that I found a stillness and a bravery in myself with you. You make me brave and I will love you until the end of time. This I vow today." Haley said with tears in her eyes.
The priest nodded over to Nathan and he took a deep breath.
"Saying, I love you just doesn't seem enough." Nathan squeezed her hand. "You're my whole world Hales.. you and the family we created. I find it hard sometimes to think that you love me too. Everyone knows I'm a screw up, I've made mistakes but you managed to see all past that .. you've seen something in me that I didn't even see in myself.. and I.. I find your goodness staggering Haley, your kindness is overwhelming .. you saved my life Hales and I will love you even after my last breath, this I vow today.. always and forever."
"Always and forever." Haley mouthed back as she fought back the tears that were threatening to escape.
"Now the rings." The pastor turned to Nathan. Nathan nodded over to Lucas. Lucas pulled out Haley's engagement ring.
"We only have one." Nathan muttered.
"I can fix that." Lydia raised her hand and took a few steps forward. Lydia grabbed a hold of the necklace she was wearing and removed a gold band from it. Then she took the gold band that was around her own finger.
"Mom.. I can't this is your's and dad's wedding rings." Haley protested.
"You're father and I shared over 30 years of marriage, 6 kids.. 9 soon to be 10 grandchildren and a lifetime of memories and I want that for you.. your father would've have wanted it for you, so take it missy, I'm not taking no for an answer." Lydia handed it over to the pastor. "Besides, think of this as a wedding present and there's no return or exchange policy."
Haley nodded, the tears now spilling from her eyes. Nathan wiped with his thumb and they both looked back to the priest.
"I can take those." Clay stepped forward but Lucas halted him.
"Back off." Lucas warned as he took the rings from Lydia and then handed them to the priest.
Nathan and Haley chuckled, a much needed relief after what just happened. After that, everything felt like a blur to Nathan. They exchanged rings and Nathan didn't even wait for the priest to announce them as husband and wife for Nathan swooped in and kissed Haley.. the mother of his child.. his wife. In that moment, it was only the two of them and neither of them could hear the cheers and applause from their friends and family.
. . . . . .
They posed for pictures with their friends and family for a couple of minutes before leaving. The doctor gave strict orders that Haley should be on bed rest. Nathan wheeled her back into the hospital and helped her get into bed.
Nathan placed a kiss on her forehead and smiled down at her.
"I'm going to find a cot they could wheel in here."
Haley nodded.
"You going to be okay?"
"Yeah, come back soon." Haley leaned forward and gave Nathan a peck on the lips. As he headed out of the room, Nathan saw Julian lurking by the doorway.
Nathan paused and the two looked each other in the eye.
"Go on." Nathan motioned Julian into the room. Whatever feelings he had for him, or his past with Haley, Nathan couldn't fault Julian for interrupting their wedding and bringing Lydia to Haley. He'd always be grateful for that. Nathan couldn't even blame Julian for loving Haley, he fell for her spell long before Julian ever met Haley.
Julian and nodded and slowly entered the room.
"Hey." Haley said softly.
"Hey yourself." Julian took a seat next to Haley.
"Thank you again for what you did."
"I told you Hales, it was nothing. When I found out about your accident. I had to come and I was glad I was able to get your mom to come with me.. but I have to admit that once the plane landed and I saw that text that you were okay and getting married, it threw me for a loop."
"I know this wasn't easy for you to do, to see me get married to Nathan."
"No, it wasn't." Julian shook his head. "It was probably the hardest thing I had to endure but in a way, I needed to see it. I needed to see you up there and proclaim to the world that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone other than me. It's what I need to move on."
"Julian Baker, you are a wonderful man and one day you will make some woman very happy."
"I hope so." Julian looked down.
"I know so." Haley squeezed his hand. "And if not, I do know a couple of single ladies who would love to have you."
"Brooke's cute but I saw her and Lucas having eye sex during the ceremony, I don't need to lose another girl to a Scott." Julian tried to lighten the mood.
"Well not one of my good friends, that'd be just too weird." Haley playfully rolled her eyes. "Look Julian," Haley said in a more serious tone.
"I can't say again how thankful I am for what you did and I am so sorry for how it ended with us. I want you to know that I did love you and it was because of that, that I had to end it with us. When I found out Nathan was thrown out of a window and paralyzed, I had to see him and when I did, that's when I knew deep down that I never truly fell out of love with him and it wasn't fair to you. You deserve someone who will give you their whole heart and I knew that person wasn't me. I couldn't lead you on into thinking there would be a future with us when my heart was stuck in the past." Haley let out a shakey breath. She at least owed Julian that much.
"I know that now." Julian squeezed her hand back. "But seeing you happy today despite everything that happened to you in the past 24 hours.. I mean it helps .. because all I ever wanted is for you to be happy and I know that you are."
Haley looked down at the gold ring on her finger. "I am happy."
. . . . . . .
Nathan shut the blinds. The morning sun was now blazing through the windows and Nathan tried his best to get the room as dark as possible.
"So they ran out of cots?" Haley asked.
"Yeah, it's okay." Nathan replied. "I'll just sleep on the chair."
"Nathan, that isn't good for your back. Maybe you should go home, I'll be fine."
"Sleeping on that chair is bad for my back but not being with you is bad for my heart." Nathan smirked.
"You Nathan Scott are quite the charmer."
"Well you haven't even seen me at my A game." Nathan leaned over and gave Haley a quick peck on the lips.
"Oh lord help me if that's true." Haley giggled. Nathan took a seat across from her and squeezed her hand.
"You need to get some rest."
Haley thought for a moment. "Kick off your shoes." Haley ordered and she scooted to the side of the bed.
"Haley what're you doing?"
"You're getting on this bed with me."
"But Hales."
"No buts Nathan. We're married now and I won't spend my wedding night.. morning ..whatever, without you next to me. Now come on. There's plenty of space."
Nathan knew she was right. When they would sleep on his king bed, they only took a small portion of it up because they would always sleep entangled in each other.
Nathan kicked off his shoes and joined Haley in bed. He wrapped an arm around her and she instantly saddled onto his side and rested her head on his shoulder. Nathan laced his free hand with Haley and brought it to his lips.
"I know this wasn't how you wanted your wedding to be."
"It's exactly how I imagined it would be." Haley said softly.
"Really?" Nathan asked amused.
"I remember when my older siblings got married, it was so busy and sometimes it became more about the seating arrangements, or the dress and all that stuff and not about the actual marriage. So I just hoped that when I got married, I would meet a man that would make all those other things seem trivial and I have. I had an image of what my wedding and while this isn't exactly what I had in mind, I imagined the perfect husband and a marriage built out of love… some always search for more ..but I don't have to. Not anymore."
Nathan smiled and kissed the top of her forehead.
"I pictured my wedding just like this." Nathan replied.
"Exactly like this?" Haley quipped.
"Not exactly." He laughed. "But you in my arms and you carrying my last name… I couldn't ask for more either." Nathan smiled back.
. . . . .
"Are you going to see him?" Haley asked as she watched Nathan continue to pack the rest of her items into a small suitcase. The doctors had kept Haley in the hospital longer than expected, a week to be exact but they wanted to make sure everything was okay before discharging her.
"Nope." Nathan quickly replied.
"But he's your father."
"Which makes it all that worse." Nathan sighed. He'd been wresting for the past week to see his father. Nathan found out that Dan's secretary Renee was hired by Dan to spy on him and Lucas but Renee was also the girlfriend of his would be blackmailer, Rachel. Now Renee was dead and Rachel was now in jail. Rachel's charges had nothing to do with the car accident but for tax evasion. Rachel was drunk and said that she doesn't remember what happened. Since Renee was the driver and died in the crash, the police had no choice but to rule it an accident. However, Rachel did owe Uncle Sam a lot of money and never paid him. Needless to say, he was glad that Rachel was out of his life for good. But Dan's whole role in this still troubled Lucas and Nathan. They didn't think that Dan had anything to do with the blackmail scheme but Dan still went behind their backs.
"Nathan, I know that this has been bothering you."
"Of course it does, he introduced those bitches into our lives and they tried to kill us."
"I'm not saying what Dan did was right but you owe it to yourself to see him Nathan."
"What for?" Nathan asked. "I don't owe him anything."
"No you don't but aren't you curious as to what he had Renee do?"
"It's my dad, he's full of mind games and I don't want to play them anymore."
"But he's still your dad." Haley took a deep breath. "Look Nathan, whatever you decide to do, I'll support you no matter what."
"And I love you for that Hales but I'm tired of all this, I'm tired of him. One way or another he always finds a way to hurt me and the people around me."
"Then don't let him hurt you anymore Nathan. You're a much stronger man than you give yourself credit for."
"And my strong hands might ring his throat if I see him." Nathan half joked but he and Haley knew that he was also have serious.
"Anyways, enough about Dan." Nathan shook his head. "You excited to go home?"
"Yes. It'll be nice to be back in more familiar settings and back in our bed."
"Tell me about it." Nathan agreed. "The mattress they have is crap." Nathan rubbed his back.
"Is your back okay?" Haley asked.
"Yeah, luckily we don't ever have to sleep in here again."
"You sure? Maybe you need to get it checked out."
"Hales, it's fine."
"You sure?"
"Yeah." Nathan laughed and leaned in kissed Haley's forehead. "Now I got to fill out some more paper work and then we can head out."
Haley nodded.
"And I'll think about seeing Dan. He can only hurt me if I let him, right?"
"Right." Haley leaned up and kissed him again. After Nathan left the room, she reached for her phone and started to dial. She was still worried over Nathan's health. Her dream of Nathan collapsing on the court still scared her. She knew that Nathan's test had come out negative but there was still that feeling in the back of her mind.
Haley called the lab where Nathan and Lucas got tested and waited for a minute before she got transferred to the appropriate department.
"Screen Gem Labs, Mary speaking, how can I help you?"
"Hi, Mary. My name is Haley James." Haley then quickly added. "Scott… Haley James-Scott. My husband is Nathan Scott, he and his brother took an HCM test not too long ago."
"Yes, I remember. I personally did the test myself."
"I was wondering if pain medication could somehow alter the test results."
"There's a possibility, depending on the drugs. But we make sure to run multiple tests and ask for the patient's medical history to cover all our bases. You should be receiving the full detailed account of all the testing in the mail, which double checks for everything including any abnormalities that could occur due to any drug interaction." Mary replied. "In fact, let me look you up real quick, I believe everything was finished with this case."
"Thank you." Haley could hear Mary typing on the other end.
"Scott, right?" Mary continued to type.
"Yes."
"Okay.. Scott. Got it." Mary replied as she pressed some more keys. "Yep a letter was mailed out yesterday so you should receive it today or tomorrow.," Mary read off the computer screen, "but let me pull the full results," Mary pressed more keys, "let's see testing results for HCM … negative."
Haley sighed in relief.
"And positive." Mary added a second later.
. . . . . .
Nathan finished signing the discharged papers for Haley as well as some other medical forms for insurance purposes. He was on his way back to Haley's room when he stopped near the cardiac wing of the hospital. Dan's heart transplant was a success and his recovery was going well. Dan's body did not reject the donor heart and by next week, Dan should be able to go home. Nathan stood there and debated to go in or not. While he was fairly certain that he didn't want anything to do with Dan, there was the small part of him that wondered about everything. Haley was right, no matter what Dan was his father. Nathan was going to be a father soon himself and one of his biggest fears was that he wouldn't be good enough, that he'd somehow end up being like Dan. He saw how unbearable his grandfather was to Dan and Dan passed it on to him. Nathan wanted to end the vicious cycle and deep down Nathan knew that in order for him to truly break free, he'd need to face Dan instead of avoiding him like what he's been doing for the past couple of years.
"Nathan." Dan muttered as he saw Nathan standing by the door way.
"Dad." Nathan said wearily as he entered the room.
"I hear congratulations are in order." Dan looked down and saw the gold band on Nathan's finger. "Now I have a daughter and grandson on the way." Dan tried to smile but Nathan wasn't smiling.
"Leave them out of this Dad."
"You're angry with me, I know."
"No Dad, you don't."
"Please let me explain."
"Explain what? How you hired your secretary to spy on us? That her crazy girlfriend tried to black mail me .. or how about the fact that those two tried to run us down!" Nathan fired back. "I don't care what that police report said, it wasn't no damn accident and the only reason I'm standing here right now is because Haley pushed me out of the way!"
"Nathan.. I didn't mean for any of this to happen."
"It still doesn't change what happened.. or what could've happened." Nathan asserted.
Dan nodded.
"Why'd you do it? Why'd you hire Renee?" Nathan crossed his arms.
"When I was first having heart problems, it made me rethink my life and how I lived it. I regret everything that happened between us and with Lucas. I tried to reach out to both of you but you never called back."
"So you thought spying on us was going to make things right?"
"I know it wasn't right but I was desperate at the time. The doctor said I may not have much time and I just wanted to see how you two were doing. I wanted so badly to be part of your lives so that's why I hired Renee to see what you two were up to. It was never supposed to go further than that. When you came to me with Rachel and I did some digging around, I found out that Renee was playing me. She wasn't supposed to talk to you but she did anyways in the hopes of trying to get some information.. information she relayed back to Rachel. The two of them had their own agenda and that's how Rachel found out about the pregnancy before you told the press and why she tried to blackmail you. I called them out on it and told them to leave Tree Hill but then.."
"But then the accident happened." Nathan filled in the blanks. "You're unbelievable."
"Nathan.. please."
"Please what? What do you want from me?"
"I want your forgiveness. I want to be the kind of father you deserve."
"It's a little too late for that."
"It's never too late son. Look, life gave me another chance."
"Doesn't mean I have to. I don't think I could ever trust you."
"I know and you have every right to be skeptical. I've made so many mistakes.. mistakes I wish I could correct or undue… and I tried Nathan. That's why I wanted Haley to tell you about the pregnancy."
"I didn't need you butting into my life. Haley was going to tell me regardless of what you did."
"No, son you don't understand. It's my fault you guys broke up all those years ago." Dan knew that if he truly wanted forgiveness, he needed to come clean with everything.
"Yeah I remember the whole speech you gave me about letting her go but that was my fault for listening to you and going to Maryland."
Dan shook his head. "Duke wanted you." He said softly.
"Huh?"
"I told you that Duke didn't want you so that you would go to Maryland.. alone."
"No, you're lying." Nathan shook his head. "There's no way."
"I worked out a deal to get Damien West in and gave Maryland my word that you would go with them." Dan said softly.
"No.. Duke was the plan. Duke was always the plan."
"The plan was for you to get into the NBA and you did." Dan sighed. "It was wrong of me, I know. My mind was clouded with dreams of you in the NBA because I couldn't make it that far."
"No.. there's no way." Nathan shook his head in disbelief.
"Damien's dad is my cardiologist Nathan."
With out another word, Nathan reached for Dan's chart and started flipping through it. He looked down at one of the signatures, Dr. Donald West.
"You bastard." Nathan let the chart fall on the floor and clenched his fist.
"I'm sorry Nathan. You don't know how sorry I am but I have new lease on life and I promise to do whatever it takes to make it up to you."
"Really, huh?" Nathan could feel his temper rise. "Tell me, how much did you pay Renee for getting her heart."
Dan looked at him curiously. "Huh?"
"The heart you got was from a fatal car accident last week.. guess how many car accidents there were in Tree Hill in the past week.. I'll tell you, only one."
"This is Renee's heart." Dan clutched to his chest.
"Ironic when you think about it." Nathan replied. "You needed a new heart and you get one just as cold and manipulative." Nathan shook his head and felt his anger rise even more. His heart was beating so fast, he thought it would explode from his chest. He couldn't believe his father. There were only a few times in his life where Nathan felt this angry. The first was the night of his accident. He remembered running into Lucas, Haley and Julian. He remembered seeing how happy Haley was with another man. He saw the life he should've been living but instead he was on the outside looking in. He was mad at himself and the life he was missing out on, a life with Haley. He took his anger out on drinking and picking the first fight he could. The night ended up with him being thrown out a window and paralyzed. The second time was the morning after he slept with Haley, the morning after his unborn son was conceived. Instead of sticking around and talking to Haley, he bailed much like he did when they graduated high school. He was angry with himself once more for taking advantage of her, for forcing himself onto her. No matter how good the sex was to both of them, Nathan was ashamed. Haley had a good life, a happy life that didn't include him in it. He only wanted to see her, he never meant to go as far as sleeping with her. But instead of dealing with it the next morning, he wrote a lame note, "Sorry" on a yellow post it and left.
Nathan spent the last several months trying to clean up his mistakes. By some act of God, Nathan was able to get Haley's forgiveness but not only that, her love and her hand in marriage. Nathan was so angry now, he felt like he could snap at just looking at his dad. It was because of him that he missed out on the past five years of his life, not only hurting himself but everyone he cared about in the process. But unlike before, Nathan wasn't mad at himself. He was at Dan and for once Nathan had nothing to do with it. His dad had played him this whole time.
This could go one of two ways, Nathan could literally smother his dad on the spot or finally take the high road for once, something Dan could never do. It would be so easy to lash out, to attack Dan and hurt him for everything he's done but Nathan thought about Haley and their son and the life they were building. Nathan had everything to lose now and he vowed he would never lose Haley again.
Nathan closed his eyes and focused in on his wife and son. He took a deep breath and released it when he opened his eyes. He felt the weight of the world lifted from him and he finally found the strength to finally break free.
"I'm done." Nathan stated and turned around and didn't look by once despite Dan's cries for Nathan to come back.
. . . . . .
Nathan stormed out of the room and walked down the hall. He was so consumed by his thoughts that when he turned the corner he nearly bumped into someone.
"I'm sorry." Nathan mumbled.
"Nate?"
"Luke?" Nathan questioned.
"Did you just come out of Dan's room?" Lucas asked.
"Yeah, were you going to see him too?" Nathan asked back.
"No actually. I went to see his doctor." Lucas had his card on his hand and held it up. Nathan glanced at it. "Dr. Donald West, MD – Head of Cardiology"
"West." Nathan mumbled.
"Yeah, you know he's Damien's father." Lucas shifted his feet nervously.
"Yeah, I know." Nathan rolled his eyes and tried to keep his temper in check. "Why did you see him?"
"Because he's familiar with Dan's HCM." Lucas looked down and then looked back up to his brother. "Because I have HCM too."
"What?" Nathan looked at his brother confused.
Lucas cleared his throat. "I lied." Lucas admitted. "You don't have it but I do."
Nathan took a step back. This couldn't be happening. "You looked me straight in the eye and told me you didn't have HCM!"
"I know, I'm sorry but I.."
"Save it." Nathan shook his head. He was tired of all the lies.
"I expected as much from Dan.. not from my own brother." Nathan said angrily and resumed walking, bumping shoulders with Lucas on his way out.
To Be Continued . . . . .