Disclaimer: The Mentalist show and characters are the property of Bruno Heller, Primrose Hill Productions, Warner Bros. Television, CBS,…
Author's Notes: Again, thank you to all my reviewers. You brighten up my miserable life. I had a lot of difficulties with this chapter, mainly because I wanted something lighter and happier. Apparently dark and twisty is more my stuff. Anyway, I hope this doesn't come off as completely ridiculous and out of nowhere compared to the previous chapters. I promise to get into angst mode soon.
Enjoy.
She should have never agreed to his condition.
At first it was nice and different. Their encounters were still wild and passionate but stopped being hurried. They took more time now, more time to please each other. The more they felt at ease with each other as time progressed, the more they experimented. Sometimes they had more fun, sometimes it wasn't as intense as it used to be. When they were both in a good mood - which, surprisingly enough, always happened at the same time – they even went at it twice in one night.
They never upgraded to the kissing part, both thinking it to be too intimate. They knew that what they did was intimate but kissing seemed to bring everything to another level. Kissing was about expressing your love to someone. Something they did not have for each other.
They did start to talk to each other. It was never about meaningful, life-altering stuff; they painfully stayed clear of that path. Instead they picked the mundane and trivial. Sometimes Jane would observe the other occupants of wherever they ended up and make up their life stories. Afterward Jane often challenged her to go find out if he was right or not. She never did, not wanting to spoil the illusion. Not wanting to spoil the fun. He certainly made for good entertainment. She was happy as long as he was focused on everyone but her. He made her laugh and that was enough. When that happened he always looked at her with a glint in his eyes she couldn't define. She pretended not to see it and didn't think too much of it.
The talking didn't stop there, it continued in the room they shared. They cautiously started to express what they liked in language, not always needing to steer the other in the right direction by hands or eyes. Lisbon found it to be exhilarating. It had been a long time since someone really cared enough to give her pleasure. It was very freeing. Jane, for his part, liked that Lisbon seemed to be so open about her needs. He was a student of her body. By nature he liked to know and learn about everything. He could admit to himself that she was his favorite subject to study.
Of course it went both ways. Lisbon was a good lover but had obviously never had lots of opportunities to really take her time in the department. All her sexual encounters had always been hard and fast. When it was done, it was done. She unashamedly took this chance to learn more about Jane. She enjoyed the feeling. Long it may last.
What bothered her was that she was starting to look forward to their time together. That was bad, so very very bad. This was exactly what she feared. That she started to like him, started to like spending time with him. She didn't know if he felt the same way, if he had noticed that they seemed to get along better now. Jane, with his keen observation skills, must know. If she dared to say so she was sure even Cho and Rigsby could tell. She wondered why he hadn't said anything yet. It wasn't his nature to let sleeping dogs lie.
Like always she tried to rationalize. They had been doing this for six months now. Maybe they were bound to develop certain 'affections' toward each other? Especially since they spend so much time together at work. Maybe she should just grow a backbone and confront Jane. Yes, she may not like it but maybe it was just what he was waiting for. That she was the one to take the first step.
Besides, she had to know exactly what was happening between them. Had to know if they were getting too close and if she had to end it. Tonight, they would talk tonight.
For once she was the one to pick up Jane from his couch, not the other way around. That enough should have told him something was off. It had been her luck that there had been no case to keep her thoughts occupied. It had been her idea to never do this while they had an open case. She was too afraid to mix her professional life into this, especially since Jane was her coworker. It would be too easy and tempting to start talking work and she didn't want that. This was completely independent to their work life.
She was impatient to get this over with so she drove them to the closest hotel to the CBI HQ. She wanted to be sober and in a place where they could be totally alone. No interruptions and distractions. They had already gone there once but she didn't care. She only had one thing in mind. Get this over with as soon as possible.
She quickly took care of their reservation, took the key and left without further ado. Jane followed her like a lost puppy. Not once did he take his eyes off of her. He didn't seem confused. He seemed content enough to follow her lead this time. He must have known she wanted to talk before she even started to give a voice to her fears in her mind. Jerk.
Her brain had worked itself into a frenzy when they finally reached their destination. She threw her purse and jacket on the bed and faced him, intent to give him a piece of her mind. Suddenly her throat was dry and she didn't remember what she needed to say. Jane simply looked at her with amusement. It irked her. Here she was trying to be serious and he was looking at her like he thought she was the funniest thing he had ever seen. Annoying son of a bitch.
He didn't say anything, he didn't move, he didn't do anything. He mirrored her stand and just watched her. His eyes prompted her to go ahead.
Lisbon took a deep breath, "I can't do this anymore."
"Do what?" He was giving her his full-blown grin. She wanted to slap it off his face. She restrained herself only because she knew it would only amuse him further.
"This thing between us," she wildly gestured to the two of them, "it's getting out of hand."
"Lisbon. What gave you that idea?" His grin had turned into a small indulgent smile and he frowned a bit.
"You. Me. The guys. Work. I don't know. It's driving me crazy. What exactly do you want from me?" The end of her patience was getting near. He was always pushing the right buttons. It was driving her slowly insane. He drove her slowly insane.
"I want to be your friend." His voice was so matter of fact she almost felt stupid for asking him.
"What? Why?" She was floored. He wanted to be her friend?
"Because I like spending time with you." He almost made it sound like a question, like it was so obvious he wasn't even sure anymore.
She should have known he had noticed. Why the hell hadn't he mentioned anything before? She rolled her eyes. Of course, in a typical Jane manner he wanted her to confront him. She shouldn't have doubted herself for at least knowing that much about him. He had the patient of an angel for such things.
"Friends can't have sex together." Good point. She was proud of herself. This would show him.
"Of course they can. Never heard of the term 'fuck buddy' before?" He was laughing. It was so unexpected. He had never laughed like that before. It was a sight to behold. It actually made her happy. She rolled her eyes again before granting him a little smile.
"Of course I have. I just never thought you would want to be… friends." The last word came out slowly, unsure of how she felt about it. Them being friends made everything more difficult.
"Believe me, it wasn't planned. Listen Lisbon; I have been enjoying our time together a lot. You're good company and I think we get along great. It seems only logical to do a little upgrade." He was genuine; she could see it in his eyes.
"I know. I felt it too. This makes things so much harder." She hated the note of desperation in her voice.
"It doesn't have to. We continue what we started. It only means we now have the right to spend time together without having sex."
"I like the sound of that." She nodded. It seemed innocent enough, right?
"Plus think about it; now we can label ourselves as 'fuck buddies' if anyone asks. Calling it 'thing' was getting annoying." His pretty grin was back.
She playfully slapped him, "that's not funny." Though the real smile on her lips betrayed her.
Without warning he picked her up and threw her on the bed. "Now, let's get on to more serious business my dear."
They were both smiling when they slowly undressed each other. Thoughts about friendship and difficulties left her mind when she felt his sensual caress on her breasts.
She sighed happily. She didn't know why but she couldn't let go of him.