Hello. Its been a while since I updated this I know. to be honest i kind of forgot about it... I've finished the story pretty much but just haven't updated it. Anyway hope you enjoy it still. Will try to finish up dating it.
Rose's POV
Rose Tyler…He never said it. He was gone now and there was nothing I could do. I was still falling into the Black hole and I would never see him or mum ever again and it was my entire fault.
The Base is quiet now and I'm huddling in one corner of a lost corridor hoping that I would die soon. It's too quiet for me so I begin talking aloud as if the Doctor can still hear me.
"I'm sorry Doctor. I never meant to hurt you. You changed my life and for that I will always be grateful. I'm sorry mum that I never got to say good bye but this is the way things happen. Oh God, I don't want to die on my own. Someone please help me. Anyone, someone please help me. I don't want to die Doctor; you said you'd always be there for me!" I broke down, there was nothing I could do not now. I knew that my pleas were a waste of time and crying would save me but I couldn't stop. I would give anything to be back with the Doctor safe and sound inside the TARDIS.
"Shhh, Ida it's alright, I've got you. You're gonna be okay." I can still hear his voice. I heard something drop; the base must be falling apart. I didn't move there was no point anymore, I would die soon anyway.
"Rose?" It was his voice again, that evil dream which would haunt me forever. Thinking he was still with me. "Rose." I felt hands on my arms and I turned away, this was just getting out of hand. I opened my eyes desperate to tell myself that I was imagining it but I looked up into familiar brown eyes gleaming from unshed tears.
Doctor's POV
I was in the lab checking on Ida even though my mind was on Rose. I didn't want her to die alone. I wish there was something that I could've done to change it but as usual the ones I love have to leave me. I heard sniffing and I moved over to Ida. "Shhh, Ida it's alright, I've got you. You're gonna be okay." Ida was asleep and not moving but the sound continued. I turned around very slowly. A small blonde figure was huddled in the corner crying. I knew that hair, I knew those clothes.
"Rose?" I whispered, not wanting to ruin the illusion. She flinched away and I moved forward. "Rose." This was no image or trick of my mind. Rose was actually here inside the TARDIS safe and sound. I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I touched her arms gently and she opened her head from her arms. Her eyes widened in disbelief.
"Doctor? Doctor!" She threw herself at me. She landed neatly in my arms. I was laughing and crying. I had never been so happy before. I hugged Rose for all I was worth. She looked up at me and kissed me. It felt wonderful to have her in my arms again. Rose wouldn't let go of me at all, not that I cared very much. I heard Ida groan and my mind turned back to the task at hand.
"Rose, I've got to look after Ida can you just let go of me for a second?" Reluctantly Rose let go.
"It's alright Ida, I've got you. You're gonna be alright. Well take you back to the rocket with Danny and Zack and you can go home." I said as I leaned over Ida checking her vitals. Everything was in working order. I went back over to the control room to contact the rocket; I was still towing them to safety. Rose tailed behind me still gripping my hand.
"Captain, it's me again. Don't worry everything is fine. Rose is with me but I can't tell you how because I have no idea. I can also give you Ida Scott by the way."
"She's alive?" I have never heard Zack sound so happy.
"Yeah, bit of oxygen starvation but she should be alright. I couldn't save the Ood, I only had time for one trip, and they went down with the planet." I felt bad that I had left about 50 Ood die but there was nothing I could do. My screen started beeping. "Ah, entering clear space. End of the time, mission closed." I turned to Rose who was standing next to me grinning for ear to ear.
Rose's POV
Everything was alright. I was inside the TARDIS with the Doctor and we were both fine. We sent Ida back to the rocket and prepared to leave. I couldn't believe the stuff I had seen and the things we'd been through. The Doctor called to the rocket through the comms.
"Zack, we'll be off now. Have a good trip home. And the next time you get curious about something… oh whats the point? You'll just go blundering in. the human race." He looked at me with a smile. I wanted to tell him I wasn't human anymore but I hadn't been a Timelady for very long that I couldn't really deny my human heritage.
"But Doctor, what did you find down there? That creature, what was it?"
I looked to the Doctor who hesitated before answering. "I don't know. Never did decipher that writing. But that's good. The day I know everything, might as well stop."
"What do you think it was, really?"
"I think we beat it and that's good enough for me."
"It said I was going to die in battle." The Doctor looked at me his face serious.
"Then it lied." We stood like that for a moment staring into each others eyes. I didn't need to go inside his mind to find out what he was thinking. It was shining in his deep brown eyes.
"Right! Onwards, upwards. Ida, see you again maybe."
"Hope so."
"And thanks boys. I'm sorry I was a pain." I smiled. Things were back to normal for now anyway.
"Hang on though Doctor, you never said. You two, who are you?"
The Doctor turned to me grinning. "Oh, the stuff of legend." He pulled a lever and the TARDIS roared into life. We were off again.
Sitting in the kitchen nursing cups of teas I was reminded of when the Doctor had asked me back to the TARDIS. Everything was the same, I was the only difference. I looked at the Doctor who wasn't looking at me but his cup. I wondered why he wouldn't look at me. As I took a sip the Doctor spoke.
"Why did you do it Rose? Why did you stay behind?" I continued to look down at me cup. "You must've thought I was dead so why did you stay?"
"I was just trying to be brave like you." I mumbled to my tea though I knew he could hear every word.
I heard him laugh a little. "I'm only brave when I have to be. Rose, being brave doesn't mean you go looking for trouble."
I looked up grinning as I could see where this was going. He was smiling at me. "But you're not scared of anything."
His smile vanished as his face became serious. "I was today. I thought I might lose you."
"Sorry I can't remember the next line. The last time I watch The Lion King was when I was about 5." The Doctor smiled at me again. "Besides Doctor, I'm never going to leave you ever again." We sat for a moment finishing our teas in silence contemplating our thoughts.
"What do you think happened Doctor?"
He was silent for a moment. I was about to clarify what I meant when he spoke. "To be honest with you Rose, I have no clue. I never thought that someone could lock himself onto the TARDIS and appear inside but it seems I was wrong. I have no idea but I'm glad it happened anyway." I smiled.
"I'm glad too Doctor. I think I must still have some connecting with the TARDIS from when I absorbed the Time Vortex. I was calling out for someone to save me and I guess the TARDIS answered me calls." It was his turn to smile at me.
"I had never thought about it like that Rose. I guess you're right. You would have more capability with the TARDIS now that you're a Timelady. Until we find another reason I think yours stands."
There was one more thing I wanted to do but was afraid of asking. It seemed the Doctor noticed.
"What is it Rose? You know you can ask me anything."
I gave a half smile. "Doctor, I want to go home." He looked confused and slightly hurt.
"If that's what you want…"
"No not like that Doctor. I want to see Mum. I nearly died and I felt bad about the way I left her last time. I just need to see her. I told you I'm not leaving you ever again." He smiled again and took me hand, heading towards the consol room.
Doctor's POV
I landed the TARDIS smoothly and watched as Rose left. I went to grab my coat when I heard her scream. Trying not to think what now? I hurried outside to find Rose sprawled on the ground seemingly unharmed.
"Rose? What happened? Are you alright?" I crouched down in front of her but she wouldn't look at me. She kept staring at the ground. "Rose look at me, what happened?"
"It's the ground Doctor, can't you feel it, it's moving all around us."
My eyebrows knitted together. "No it's not moving Rose. The ground is still like it always is."
"But it is Doctor! It's like you said, the world spinning. I can feel the planet falling through space." She looked at me terrified. I wanted to smack myself for being so stupid. I'd been so careless with Rose recently that I needed to look after her better. I had completely forgotten about feeling the world turn. I had gotten so used to it that I could just ignore it. Concentrating I felt the earth turning on its axis. I could see how Rose had fallen over but she would get used to it just as I had done. Gently I pulled Rose to her feet while she held onto me.
"It's alright Rose. Yes I can feel it now and I'm sorry I forgot to warn you but you'll get used to it. It sort of comes with the job description. You wanted to see Jackie remember? Lets not keep her waiting." Rose seemed to wake up at Jackie's name and headed towards the flat stumbling a little. I followed at a slower pace allowing her that time alone with her mother. I looked around the estate. It was the same as ever. The sun was setting slowly in the east casting long shadows on the ground. My tummy grumbled. I wondered if Jackie would cook me something but I knew not to count on that.
I walked through the open flat door letting it shut behind me. Rose was in Jackie's arms. Jackie was soothing her. I walked in and leaned against the wall. Jackie's head snapped up and looked at me above Rose's head.
"What have you done this time? What happened? Where did you go?" Jackie glared at me while she held on to Rose.
"Some place far away." Jackie pulled her gaze away from me knowing I wouldn't say anything else.
"Rose? What's wrong?" I watched as Rose looked up wiping her eyes. She just shook her head.
"It's nothing mum honestly. I just wanted to see you." It was a feeble lie and we all knew it but no one said anything.
"You look exhausted Rose when was the last time you had a decent sleep." Jackie glared at me. "Go have a lie down." I agreed with Jackie, Rose needed to rest for a while.
"I'm fine mum believe me." Rose would always be stubborn.
"Go on Rose while you're here." Jackie was quite insistent. Rose looked to me and I nodded. Don't worry about me I told her in her head, it will give me a chance to talk to Jackie. Rose gave a small nod and then looked to Jackie.
"Okay mum, I will. It's getting late anyway. Don't you two stay up all night?" I smiled.
You do know that I won't be able to save you from any slapping.
"Good night hon." Rose gave Jackie a kiss on the check while I laughed inside. Don't worry about me, I can look after myself.
"Good night Rose." Rose smiled.
"Night." Rose left the room.
I was disappointed that I didn't get a kiss but in front of Jackie might not be the best time. It was just me and Jackie now. Jackie said nothing but looked at me for a while and then suddenly left for the kitchen. I heard her move around the kitchen; the kettle boiling and cups being set down on the counter. She came back out with two cups of steaming hot tea, put them on the table and sat down. Getting the hint I sat down and waited. I watched as she sipped her tea. Swallowing she looked up at me her eyes alight.
"I don't trust you as far as I can throw you Doctor just to let you know."
"Ah I see." This is what Jackie and I really needed, to have this kind of talk.
"I still think you're going to leave her again just like last time." Jackie picked up a tea spoon and stirred her tea. I folded my hands around my cup.
"Last time was different." I told her trying not to sound like a little kid who was being told off. Jackie's spoon didn't stop turning as she said,
"Bullshit. You left last time, I know you will leave again." I looked up at her and held her gaze.
"I swear to you it was. I'd been having these dreams where Rose would get old and die while I was helpless. I couldn't do that to her so I made her leave." Jackie's eye's narrowed. Her spoon stopped suddenly.
"You bastard. You were saving your own skin, you selfish bastard."
"And don't I know it. But things have changed Jackie. I swear to you. I will never leave Rose again but she is free to come and go as she likes. I will say this though; if I leave it won't be by choice." Jackie opened her mouth to speak. "No let me finish. If I have to leave her, say if I'm dying and there is nothing that can save me then I will send her back to you even if I have to strap her to the TARDIS. That is one thing I can and will promise you Jackie, whether you trust me or not I will send her back to you." We were both very quiet so for a moment. I watched as Jackie sipped her tea not making eye contact.
I sipped my tea and looked at Jackie again. "What was it like?" I asked breaking the silence. "When I left, what was it like with Rose?"
"Oh like you don't know." Jackie hesitated before she continued. "You've seen her Doctor, she's skin and bone these days. At the start it was hell. It was like I was living with a ghost. She wouldn't do anything at all. She never left her bed, she didn't eat or sleep. I had to bribe and black mail her to eat some food and have a shower. I checked her room for pills and razors. I was so afraid I was going to lose her that I was loosing my mind over her. I didn't know who she was any more. She wasn't my Rose, she was the shell of my daughter. You changed her Doctor and there didn't seem like I could do anything about it." I looked down at my cup again. "And you know what hurt me the most? What scared me more than anything?"
I shook my head, I didn't want to know. This had already gone too far but Jackie didn't' take any notice. "She wouldn't tell me anything at all. Nothing, her own mother and she wasn't able to tell me. It was like when you first stole her away from me and she wouldn't tell me where she went. Gone a whole year and I had no idea what was going on only this time it was worse. I knew where she was but there was nothing I could do. I got proper doctors in to talk to her but she would tell them nothing. Then I got Mickey over and left them to it. I don't know what he did but it changed something in her. She woke up again and started living her life. Though it wasn't what I call living, she just went through the motions. She never went out or saw any friends or did anything. That's why I hate you Doctor."
I looked up feeling braver seeing as we had moved off the topic of Rose and back onto me. I could take any abuse about me but anything about what I did to Rose cut me deep. "You have changed my daughter and it seems to me that there is nothing I can do that will make her leave you. So it looks like I'm stuck with you whether I like it or not because I am not about to give up the one beautiful thing in my life but I am warning you sir, if you stick one toe out of line, if you hurt her in anyway Doctor, I swear I will make you life hell for as long as you live. You got that? So you watch it and keep watching."
I nodded. "Understood Jackie, loud and clear."
It was silent again for a moment while we both finished our teas. Suddenly Jackie stood up.
"Rose was right. It's getting late." I stood up as well. I would head back to the TARDIS for the night and come back for Rose in the morning. "I guess you can sleep on the couch tonight Doctor."
I was shocked at her offer. "Thanks Jackie."
She looked at me sternly. "I'm not doing this for you, I'm doing it for her got that?"
"I guess I deserve that." I saw Jackie's shock at my agreement. It was fine for her not to like me staying in her house and I was okay with that. It was of course my entire fault.
"Right then." Jackie looked uncomfortable.
"Good night Jackie." I moved over to the couch as Jackie moved towards her bedroom.
"Night."
I lay on the couch with my suit jacket covering me. Jackie hadn't given me any blankets but I didn't want to ask too much of her right now. I was thinking about how I was going to prove to Jackie that I was in this for the long run now. Prove to her how much I loved Rose. I felt for my suit pocket and pulled out the small box. I turned the box over in my hands thinking. Maybe this was the right time to use it.
Rose's POV
A sudden thirst woke me in the morning. I pulled myself out of bed and made my way towards the kitchen in search of a drink. I had to pause in the lounge, my hand covering my mouth to stop me from laughing.
The Doctor was sprawled on the couch, his long legs dangling over the edge. The couch was much too small for him. I was surprise that mum let him stay here though I saw she hadn't given him a blanket, he was using his suit jacket for warmth. Forgetting my thirst I made my way over to him and sat down on the coffee table before him. He looked so peaceful lying there. His mouth was slightly open, his right arm resting above his head while his left lay across his stomach. It seemed to me that though sleeping on the couch might not be very comfortable, this was the Doctor's first decent sleep in a long time. I know I must have worried him a lot while I was sick but I took pleasure now knowing that he would never have to worry about me again. I must've made a noise or something because he woke up.
He looked around with sleepy eyes. I smiled at him.
"Hello you." He looked back at me still waking up.
"Hi. How are you this morning?"
I leaned him and kissed his mouth. He smiled as I sat back again. "I could get used to that." My smile turned into a grin.
"Me too. I'm good by the way. A nice sleep in just what I needed though I didn't anticipate it being at home." He shifted on the couch giving me room to snuggle in next to him. Gently he placed his right arm over my shoulder laying his hand on my right heart. It was as if he was assuring himself that I was still his forever. I snuggled in closer.
"Did you have a good chat with my darling mother?"
"As a matter of fact, I did. We just needed to clear up a few points on where we stood with each other."
"I don't know why she did that. It's not like she can control me anymore I am 20 not a child."
"She knows that but you're her only daughter. She's just making sure you're safe that's all. I understand perfectly. Besides I had some things I wanted to know. It's all fair in love and war." I gave a half laugh concerned about what Mum had told him about me. It's not like he wasn't beating himself up about it already. I wanted to ignore the topic as much as possible.
"You understand because you've been a father haven't you?" I was almost afraid to ask him because I knew it hurt to think about them but I didn't know where to take this conversation. It was something that had been on my mind for a while now.
"Yeah. I was."
"Do you think that maybe one day…" I wanted him to get where I was going without having to spell it out for him word by word.
"One day maybe." He gave a half laugh. "I know you've been thinking about it Rose and I have too honestly. It's been hard though. I feel like I'm disrespecting them or something but then I see you and I see how much I love you. I think then that maybe I could have that life again, that enjoyment in my life. I have been thinking about it Rose honestly."
I smiled. "I believe you Doctor. Did you ever think that respecting them would be better for you to just continue with your life remembering them?"
"I have thought about it but then I remember that they died at my hand."
"You did the right thing though. Always remember that. Anyway I was just bringing the subject up because Mum isn't getting any younger and I know how much joy it would bring her if she had a little grandchild."
The Doctor sat up a little to look at me straight in the eye. "I know but you do realise how different travelling will be with a child in tow. It will change everything about it."
I nodded, knowing the consequences of a child. "I do know that Doctor. We could always leave him with Mum. She'd love that."
He laughed. "I bet she would. Anyway I'm starving, you gonna feed me any time soon?"
I waked him lightly on the arm and dragged him towards the kitchen. "Pancakes sound good to you?"
Much to my surprise the Doctor was amazing at flipping pancakes. He was cooking them when I heard mum calling for me. Confused as to why she was calling me I left the cooking to the Doctor and went to my mum. She was still in bed when I reached her room. She patted the space on the bed and obediently I lay down next to her.
"What's up Mum?" I asked looking at her.
"I could ask you the same thing Rose."
"Mum please, don't start this now. Really I'm not in the mood." I moved to get up but she pulled me back down.
"Well I'm in the mood Rose. I want to know what happened to you because you aren't the same as you were when you left. Something has changed you and I want to know what." Oh crap. I had forgotten that Mum would probably notice that I had changed since the last time I saw her. I wasn't human anymore, that was certainly a change in me.
"Nothing has changed me mum honestly. I'm the same as I was when I left."
"Don't toy with me Rose. I know my own daughter. I wish you would tell me but I do understand that you might not want to, what I don't understand is why you would lie through your teeth to me when I can see clear as day that something has changed."
I sighed knowing that I should never have tried to lie to mum. She was my mother after all and mothers do know all.
"I'm sorry Mum I truly am. Its just things are better now than they were. My life is complete now, I have the Doctor back and I still have you waiting for me when I come home. I can't tell you what happened because I don't want to know your reaction. Maybe one day I'll tell you mum but right now everything is alright and I want it to stay that way. I can't bear to loose you."
"I'm not going any where Rose, I don't want to make you chose between him and me because I can't allow myself to be that cruel. I want you to know that I've told the Doctor that I'm going to be keeping an eye on him and there is nothing you can do about that. I only want you safe."
I smiled. My mum wouldn't stop caring for me if the world ended.
"Breakfast is ready!" The Doctor called from the kitchen and mum's eyebrows shot up.
"It cooks?"
I laughed as I dragged her out of her bed. "He has his uses." I said as we entered the kitchen.
The Doctor had set the table and everything. The pancakes looked amazing.
"I hope you're not talking about me." I could see laughter in his eyes as we sat down.
"Oh no Doctor. We were just someone who has a few useful qualities at times." The Doctor eyed me suspiciously as we tucked into the pancakes he had cooked for us. They were delicious.
Doctor's POV
We were all sitting down eating my pancakes. The mood was quite cheerful. Jackie gossiped about people I didn't know while Rose made the right sounds and comments at the right moments.
Rose's question about children had made my mind spin. Of course she would want a child of her own and I couldn't think of anyone else who I would want to have my child. Rose would be a perfect mother I know she would. I know Rose felt it was the right time but to be honest I think she was rushing a little. I know that she had nearly died and didn't want to waste anytime but she had all of eternity for that now and I wasn't going any where. I noticed that the conversation between Rose and Jackie had died down so I took this as my opportune moment to ask my question.
"Rose," She looked over at me. "Rose Tyler, you know that I love you more than the whole wide universe and you know that there is nothing I wouldn't do for you." Rose nodded looking a little confused. She tried to ask me what I was doing inside my head but I blocked her out. There was no way I was going to ruin the surprise for her. "You know this and I know this but Jackie doesn't." I continued talking before Jackie could cut in. "I've been thinking all night of ways to make Jackie realise how much you mean to me because I don't want you to chose between her and me because that's just cruel. And I think I may have found the right way."
Getting up slowly I kneeled on one knee next to Rose pulling out the little velvet box from my pocket. She smiled at me while Jackie gasped. "I know this isn't the most romantic place but I wanted it to be where you felt most comfortable and where Jackie was able to see how much I love you." Holding the box forward and opening towards Rose I spoke the words so many had said before. "Rose Tyler, I promise to love you and look after you for all of time no matter what happens. Will you marry me?" Rose grinned at me tears forming in her eyes.
"Of course Doctor!" I grinned back at her and gently place the ring on her left hand. It fitted perfectly; the TARDIS had made sure of that. I stood up with Rose and kissed her right on the mouth, not caring if Jackie saw. Rose had just made me so happy. Rose stepped back into better light to inspect the ring. "Its beautiful." She said in awe. I moved forward and took a hold of her hands.
"It's a White Point Star. Its only found on Gallifrey, it's the last one in existence now."
Her eyes widened. "I guess I'd better look after it then hadn't I?"
We turned to Jackie who was still sitting down looking shocked. Rose went over to her. "Mum… are you alright?"
Jackie smiled. "Alright? I'm better than alright! My daughter is getting married! You don't know how long I've waited for this." Jackie leaped up and hugged Rose. She turned to me. "I'll still have an eye on you Doctor, just for fun."
I grinned. "Fair enough... mum."
Jackie eyes widened. "No way! Son-in-law! This can't be happening!" Rose and I laughed.
Its quite a large chapter I know. But what did you think? Good? Bad? Please let me know. Might to an epilogue thing like 10 years later with kids etc. What names...?
Please review. Thanks
xx