Hi lovely readers,
Thank you so much for all of the lovely reviews on the last chapter. It means so much!
This prompt was requested by a guest and I absolutely loved writing it! It was so similar to what I've done before but so different at the same time and I loved that so thank you so much for requesting. I hope it was what you were after.
Enjoy reading everyone.
A shaking hand was held tightly within Sheldon's grasp. Of course, his hands were trembling just as much, if not even more than Amy's, if she wasn't in so much pain she definitely would have commented on this fact. Her nails digging in to the palms of his hand, he was almost sure she was going to draw blood and yet he had never loved her more. He was in complete awe of her, in total admiration of her strength and resilience and what she was capable of.
Sheldon wondered if all new dads to be felt like this, whether it took a moment like this for them to see their loved one in a whole new light. To feel a whole, brand new love for them. People had told him that he would never love her more after watching her go through all of this and although sceptical at first, Sheldon found it all to be completely true.
Watching her right now, watching her throughout the past twenty two hours had made his heart burst with more love than he ever thought possible and yet ache with a pain that he never knew could be so deep. Every pained whimper or cry that Amy let out broke his heart, although he knew it wasn't possible it was like he was feeling her pain too. His heart was thumping in his chest so hard and loud he felt like the whole room could hear it.
"That's it Amy, well done. Just rest for now sweetheart, catch your breath. Nice deep breaths" the assistant midwife spoke so gently and calmly as Amy tilted back her head and began to breathe deep and slowly. Her eyes were gently closed as she breathed in through her nose and let the breath go through her mouth, for a brief moment she looked almost peaceful.
Sheldon reached down and brushed away a few strands of hair from her face. What had started out as a rather neat bun, now resembled just a pile of messy hair that was scooped up on top of her head. Although, he knew she could feel his hand wrapped tightly around hers, he wanted to let her know that he was there.
"You're doing really well Amy" he had used this phrase numerous times over the past twenty two hours. Twenty two hours! He couldn't quite believe they had been at this for twenty two hours, Amy had briefed him on the fact that first deliveries could be slow but he had always told her that their daughter was a Cooper therefore she would be quick and efficient. How wrong he was.
Without speaking, she pulled on the hand he was holding, bring it up to her face and then her lips, where she gently kissed the back of it.
"Are you doing okay?" she whispered, through her deep and controlled breaths, eyes closed.
"I'm good, I'm good" Sheldon told her as he began to gently trace circles on her hand using his thumb. He knew if she didn't like she would have told him, there had been a few times throughout the labour so far where she had snapped at him. One time was right at the beginning, something that seemed so long ago now, where he was panicking that they needed to go to the hospital right away as soon as one contraction was five minutes apart. The other was only a few hours ago, when things started getting really intense and Amy was in agony, he had asked, practically begged her to take something, some medication of some sort. That of course, caused Amy to snap.
From the start of her pregnancy, Amy had made it clear that she didn't want any medication unless absolutely necessary. He had to admire that about her, even though she was experiencing the worst pain she ever felt in her whole life she was still determined to stick to her decision and get through it. No one had really prepared him for how heartbreaking it would be seeing her like this, so much so that even at one stage he was close to asking for something to take away his pain at watching Amy.
"We're having a baby" her eyes opened for a split second and she looked right at him, a small smile dancing on her lips as she muttered those four words. She looked exhausted, like all the energy and light had been drained from her eyes, had been drained from her body. "Oh" Amy hissed in another breath, giving Sheldon no time to respond. "There's another one coming."
"Okay darling, just like with before, take in a nice deep breath and give us a really big push" the midwife spoke gently placing her hand on Amy's knee. Before Sheldon knew it, Amy was pushing again, her hand squeezing the life from his whilst her other was braced against her thigh.
Sheldon could hear people encouraging her, telling her what amazing job she was doing, telling her not to stop pushing and to keep going. In that moment, Sheldon couldn't quite find his words, all he could focus on was Amy. She had been at this stage for a whole hour and still nothing had happened. Naively, he assumed this would all be over by now, that Amy would no longer be in pain with their little girl in her arms and they'd both be in that post birth baby bliss he'd heard people talk about. Right now, as he watched Amy giving it her all, he wanted that more than anything.
—
Another hour had passed and there was still no sign of their baby, not even the tiniest glimpse. Sheldon's hand was numb. Amy was exhausted. The atmosphere had suddenly started to change. Sheldon hadn't missed the glances between the midwife and her assistant, the constant checks of the baby's heart rate, the little mutters after every push Amy gave.
"Sweetie" the midwife spoke gently, placing her hand upon Amy's knee. With her head lolled against Sheldon's chest, all Amy could manage was a slow nod of the head, much more than that required a level of effort and energy that she no longer had. Even opening her eyes felt like too much. "You are doing the most amazing job but baby just isn't moving down the way we'd like her to" she explained, Sheldon could sense there was more to come. "You've been pushing so well for so long and nothing has really progressed. We may need to start thinking about a c-section."
Amy eyes instantly pinged open, seeming more alive than she had been for a good few hours. Sheldon's heart began to race, a c-section was major surgery that came with all kinds of risks and complications. He didn't want that for his wife and daughter.
"No, no" Amy began to shake her head and push herself away from Sheldon, sitting up straighter. She wanted to appear more awake than she felt, more alert. "I can do this, please let me do this" she could feel herself begging them to let her give this a go. Not knowing whether she would ever do this again, Amy wanted to experience everything, she wanted to feel the pain and experience that amazing rush straight after birth, she wanted her baby placed on her chest instantly, she wanted to be able to care for her baby and move around freely in the days after the birth. "I can do this. I can push her out, please. Please let me do this."
Sheldon could feel Amy grasping his hand tighter. In this moment he felt torn and completely useless. Nothing he could do or say could make Amy feel any better, this was far from the perfect birth she had planned but all he knew was that he wanted her out of pain and for both her and their daughter to be safe. He watched the midwifes face as she looked over the monitors, checking over Amy and the baby before consulting with the assistant midwife in the room.
Once a doctor was called in to assess the situation, it was agreed that Amy had another thirty minutes to make progress. She had just a quarter of the time that they had been at this already for something to happen before matters were taken out of her hands.
"Let's try another position" the midwife told her. Over the past few hours, Sheldon was sure they had tried every position possible. "Let's try you up on your knees, leaning on to Sheldon" they had already tried this position, he wanted to point it out but even he knew that this wasn't really the best time. "That's what husbands are for" she flashed him a smile, trying to lighten the mood. It was always hard for the fathers, seeing your loved one in pain, being so out of your comfort zone and the fear of the unknown was always incredibly daunting.
Sheldon wasn't even sure Amy would be able to move, she was so exhausted but she was determined so with his help and the help of the midwife, she was able to pull herself up onto her knees that were shaking beneath her. Reaching up, her hands latched on to Sheldon's upper arms although he was now having to deal with being squeezed in another place, his hands were grateful for the release.
As she let her forehead rest against the spot just below his shoulder, she took comfort in his scent. The delicate, soft floral smell of baby powder was what kept her breathing even and helped calm her down. Simply changing positions took up all the energy she had. Sheldon lowered his head, placing a kiss to the top of Amy's. Whilst Amy had been pushing, he hadn't spoken much, knowing that she was in the zone and listening to the midwives he didn't want to become a distraction but he knew it meant a lot to Amy that he was there and right now in that moment, a kiss to the head was all he could to show her that.
Her fingers were trembling as she clung on to him for dear life, in fact her whole body was shaking. He quickly realised that if he were to move out of the the way, he couldn't guarantee that she would be able to hold herself up. He was her pillar of strength both physically and emotionally, he wasn't sure he'd ever been that before.
"When you feel all that pressure Amy, just go for it" the midwife, who has settled behind her, instructed encouragingly. It wasn't long before Amy felt the pain that she was now growing used to, only this time she cried out into Sheldon's shoulder, letting out everything that had been building up. It was a mix of every emotion; pain, fear, frustration, tiredness. She wasn't sure she could do this anymore.
"It's okay, it's okay" Sheldon knew it wasn't really okay but her cry of pain broke his heart. No matter what happened he made a promise to himself in that moment to make sure everything would be okay, everything had to turn out okay.
"I just want her out" she whimpered, her voice quiet, just for him to hear.
"I know, I know" he rubbed her arm gently. "You're doing so good though. So good" he kissed her head again not really knowing what else to do.
Slowly, the minutes ticked by and Amy continued to give it her all, even though it was clear little to no progress was being made. It made Sheldon's heart ache knowing that all of her efforts were in vain, but what happened next caused things to rapidly change.
"Amy" the midwife was suddenly by Sheldon's side, standing in front of Amy, placing a hand upon her shoulder. "We're noticing a few decelerations with baby's heartbeat, you've been pushing for a long time and I think baby is now getting a little stressed" she explained, they both watched Amy's face as her lip began to shake and her eyes filled with tears. "We need to take you down for a c-section" although her voice was gentle, this time Amy knew it wasn't up for discussion, she wasn't being asked if everything was okay, they were telling her this is what was needed.
"Okay" Amy nodded, barely able to find her voice. Nothing else mattered apart from her baby, she now didn't care that she wouldn't be giving birth to her the way she wanted. She just wanted a healthy baby.
Before Amy could really process what was happening, medical staff flocked around her. People she had never seen before, faces that she didn't recognise and voices that were unfamiliar. Right at the moment, the only person keeping her sane was Sheldon, who stood right by her side, allowing her to cling onto him for dear life from where she lay on the bed.
"Will everything be okay?" he asked. The thought of what Amy was about to go through made him feel sick, when he asked that question it really was referring to both his wife and daughter. He wasn't sure what he would do if something happened.
"We need to get Amy down to the operating room" he heard someone speak in reply to his question, however he couldn't quite see who the voice belonged to.
With a clang the bars on the bed were raised and Amy was being wheeled away through the double doors of their cosy delivery suite where they had planned to welcome their daughter, out into the brightly lit corridors. Everyone was waking fast and Sheldon really was trying his best to pick up the pace and hurry alongside them, the last thing he wanted was to let Amy go.
"Sheldon, do you want to come with me and we can get you in your scrubs?" the assistant midwife who had been with them in the room asked as they approached the operating room. He looked down at Amy, her eyes pleading with him not to leave her but also knowing it was necessary.
"You'll be really quick?" Amy asked, the tears from earlier still sitting in her eyes.
"Yeah" he nodded his head quickly. "I'll be quick. I promise" he kissed her hand and muttered an I love you before she disappeared through another set of double doors.
—
Sheldon had never been one to show emotion in front of others, particularly people he would regard as almost strangers but as he was handed his set of scrubs, he felt like he wanted to cry. Momentarily stepping away from the situation had allowed what was happening to fully sink in. Their baby's heart rate dropping, Amy in pain, crying into his shoulder, it was all too much.
"It's a lot to take in isn't it?" the midwife who accompanied him spoke gently. Although, twenty four hours had passed, she had stuck with them the most throughout it all. Of course, her shift ended ,m then as soon as her next one started she was back with them.
"It is" he nodded, trying his hardest not to cry. He could already feel the lump forming in his throat.
"They'll be okay. They're pretty amazing people in there with Amy, she's in good hands"
"Thank you" he hadn't quite realised how much he needed to hear that. Whether he believed it to be true or not, no one throughout all of this was yet to tell him that everything was going to be okay. He had been the one to reassure Amy, the staff around them had reassured Amy, no one until now had said it to him and regardless of his thoughts, he needed to pull himself together because Amy needed him more than anything.
—
If Amy thought the hallways were bright, the operating room was something else. Bright, white light filled her eyes, almost making them sting as the doors flung open. She wasn't one to believe in this kind of ideology but she imagined this was how bright somewhere like heaven would be, bright, blinding light. The room was cold, she felt cold.
She was told sit on the edge of the bed, which she obliged to, her legs dangling in the air as she finally let the tears fall down her face. Instantly, she was changed into a hospital gown, the thin material felt awful on her skin and the huge gapping hole at the back, exposing her skin sent a shiver down her spine. Never in her life had she felt more fragile, more vulnerable.
"Everything is going to be okay darling" an older midwife that Amy hadn't met suddenly took hold of her hand and began affectionately rubbing her knuckles. The gesture was comforting and her presence was suddenly so calming it made Amy want to cry even more. She was an older lady, with a kind face that told Amy she had done this job for years and seen many mothers to be just like her. "My name is Grace. They're going to start administering the epidural in a minute" she explained. "They're going to need you to really curl forward, you can lean on me" she smiled and the corners of her eye creased.
"They said her heart rate was dropping. Will she be okay?" Amy asked, reaching up to wipe the tears from her cheeks. That was all she could focus on.
"Oh you're having a girl" Grace beamed, this was something that was learnt on the job, a tactic to take their mind off what was going on. Talking about their baby always seemed to do to the trick. Amy nodded, she was about to respond when the anaesthetist behind her started to speak.
"Okay Amy, can you lean forward for me?" he was formal and efficient, Amy could tell that much already. Grace stepped closer and scooped her up in her arms, she rested her head against her shoulder. Suddenly, she felt the strong tightening pain across her stomach she was having another contraction.
"I'm having a contraction" she voiced quickly, unsure of what to do and what was about to happen.
"It's okay, we'll wait until this ones over before we start the epidural" Grace told her gently. "Just breathe through it my lovely, take big deep breaths" Amy cried out, the pain and her fear was all just too much. She was so scared.
"I need Sheldon. Where's Sheldon?"
"Big breaths darling. He'll be here really soon, I promise. You're doing a brilliant job" Grace reminded her as she tried her hardest to take deep breaths through the pain. "Do you have a name for your little one?" she asked, again trying to take Amy's mind off of the pain. She felt Amy shake her head. "You know, I welcomed my first granddaughter four months ago, after three grandsons, finally a little girl."
"What's her name?" Amy asked as the pain started to subsided and her breathing returned to normal.
"Sophie" she answered. "Oh look, here he is" Grace smiled as someone that she could only imagine was Sheldon came through the doors. His eyes were frantic as he took in his surroundings, searching for Amy. She had seen that look many times before. "They're just about to administer the epidural. Let her lean on you and keep her really still" Grace explained as she slid away, letting Sheldon take her place.
"You're here" she was crying again, the relief that came over her upon seeing him was overwhelming.
"I'm here, I'm not going anywhere"
The anaesthetist spoke again, letting Amy know he was going to go ahead and start the epidural. She curled herself forward, placing her head against Sheldon's chest as he held her tightly, desperate to keep her still.
"Okay Amy, you're going to feel a sharp pinch"
"Don't look" Amy told Sheldon, as she felt him move to kiss her head. "It's a really big needle."
"I'm not looking" he knew better than to look, he would have probably ended up on the floor if he had clocked the size of the needle being inserted into Amy's back. She was being so brave, everything that she had been through so far and now she was being poked and prodded by an incredibly sharp needle. He was so proud of her, he loved her so much.
—
"Can you feel that Amy?" someone from behind the blue screen asked her. Once the epidural was in and had taken affect, Amy was moved to the operating table, a screen was put up in place shielding their view of the procedure.
"No" Amy replied, she turned to Sheldon. "I can't feel a thing" normally, the notion of not being able to feel the lower half of your body was quite scary but Sheldon could only imagine the relief it brought to Amy after hours of pain. He was definitely grateful for that. "You look handsome in your scrubs" she smiled at him, he did look incredibly cute.
"Do I?" he asked, looking down at his attire. He wasn't entirely sure he agreed but if it made her happy, then he was happy to go along with it.
"It brings out your eyes" she was looking at him dreamily, he couldn't figure out whether this was a result of the epidural or because she really liked him in his scrubs. He figured the first option. "I hope she has your eyes."
"We'll find out soon"
They were going to be parents. He couldn't quite believe that he was about to become a father and that the beautiful Amy he met in that coffee shop all those years ago was about to become a mother. Even now, just moments, minutes off meeting his daughter, the thought was so surreal. He felt her squeeze his hand, bringing him back to reality.
"Are you doing okay?" he asked once he saw her face pinch.
"I can just feel tugging" what she could feel wasn't painful, she wasn't even sure she would describe it as uncomfortable, it was just an unusual pressure, an unfamiliar heaviness on her abdomen.
"That is normal isn't it?" Sheldon asked, looking up to get some confirmation. Someone from the medical team, Sheldon had no idea what their role was nodded, explaining it was all completely normal and that Amy was doing a great job.
The minutes ticked by. Sheldon never once let go of Amy's hand. They talked about their daughter constantly, who she was going to look like, who's traits they wanted her to inherit and their hopes for her future. It was going to be a whole new chapter, a whole new exciting, somewhat scary chapter.
"Here she is" one of the doctors announced, holding her up high so her parents could see her. Sheldon and Amy's hearts stopped as their eyes landed up on their daughter for the very first, she was here, she was safe and if on cue she let out a loud cry that was like music to their ears.
"Oh she's here" Amy cried, tears falling from her eyes, her heart ached to hold her, to feel her little body against her chest. "Is she okay?" even though she was crying, she still needed confirmation.
"She looks great" one of the midwives reassured her as Amy watched the doctor hand her daughter over to one of the medical team. "We're going to do all our usual checks and then you'll be able to give her a cuddle" she couldn't wait to hold her, her arms were aching. "Sheldon, you're welcome to go over and be with her."
If the truth be told, he was in a complete state of shock. He was feeling emotions he was sure he'd never felt before. The love he suddenly felt for this little baby, his baby girl was overwhelming, so overwhelming it scared him. He loved her so much already.
"You can go" Amy told him as he looked between her and the corner of the room where their daughter was still crying.
"I love you" he kissed her forehead. "I love you"
Throughout Amy's pregnancy, although Sheldon had been the doting dad to be, nothing could have prepared her for the sight that she saw coming towards her. Never did she imagine Sheldon Cooper to look so perfect holding a baby, never did she imagine him holding a baby full stop.
"Look at you" she was crying already, as she watched Sheldon carefully lower himself on to the stool up her head, gently cradling the baby in his arms. He looked so natural and at ease if he was nervous at all, it definitely wasn't showing.
"I think she wants to meet you" Sheldon smiled, he looked so happy as he carefully handed their daughter over to Amy. She gasped as she felt the tiny weight on her chest, her arms reaching up to cradle her close. Amy never wanted to forget this moment, she wanted to remember it all forever. Her tiny little hands and fingers, her tiny button nose and beautiful rosebud lips.
"Hello my darling. Hi" Amy cooed. "You gave us all quite a scare didn't you. I'm so glad you're here"
"Amy she's so perfect" Sheldon commented, he knew he was biased but she really was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. The look in his eyes was one Amy had never seen before so full of love and adoration. It made her heart burst. "She's got the cutest little face"
"We made her, can you believe that?" Amy was amazed by the fact that they had made a whole other person, that this little girl in her arms was the same baby that had grown inside her. The one that they had felt constantly moving and kicking. She was theirs forever and couldn't wait for family life to begin.
"Of course, we're geniuses after all."
Thank you so much for reading. As always reviews are so welcome and so appreciated. Please send in your requests if you have any and I will try my best to fill them for you.
Stay safe
Lots of love