Author's Note: Hi again to everyone that's left... I had up to chapter 9 finished before I posted chapter 6, and I was trying to decide whether to rewrite or change things, but even people who hate where I'm going the most said I shouldn't change it. So I haven't... I'm posting it intact the way I originally wrote it, and though I'm much less confident now about whether people will like where the story is going, I sincerely hope you do. Anyway, here it is... hope you enjoy!
When Bella awoke, she could hear two distinct voices downstairs- one Jacob's, one Charlie's. She could only imagine what they were talking about, and she felt a pang of guilt about her father, and wished she had been the one to tell him all the secrets she'd been keeping since she'd met Edward. As usual, he had taken the news in stride, but she knew part of him must have been hurt that she hadn't felt she could trust him to believe her.
Gingerly, she put a hand on her huge belly, still surprised as her fingertips touched her skin much sooner than they normally would have. Everything ached; most women had the better part of a year to stretch into the form Bella had now, but this had happened to her overnight- or at least, within a few days. She still didn't know how much time had passed between when she and Edward had been together and when she'd awoken, huge and terrified, on Sue's examining table in La Push. Now she wondered how she had ended up there at all. Why hadn't Edward taken her to Carlisle instead? How had Sue gotten involved? And who had actually taken her over the border that the Cullens could not pass?
Bella laid quietly, willing herself to remember anything, something.
She remembered her feelings as Edward told her he was leaving, and she remembered with disgust how she had clung to him, wished he wouldn't go, felt terrified and abandoned. Why had she been so scared? The time she'd spent in Abi's community had changed her, changed her outlook on Edward, on Jacob… yet in the bitter end she had acted as the girl Edward had left behind to depression and despair. Where had her love for Jacob been then? Why had she let her fear overwhelm her? Why was she so weak?
She felt wretched and disgusting, an idiot, a victim to the spell Jacob had always accused Edward of casting over her. She tried not to think about Edward's body over hers, tried not to think of the sudden panic as she realized the mistake she was making, too late to stop anything, too late to make a difference. And now this.
Bella touched her belly absently with her fingertips. What was this mystery growing beneath her skin? Who was this person? And how could it be here, now, in this form, so developed in such a short time? How was that possible?
What did it all mean?
She closed her eyes and tried to remember details that were lost in a sea of fear and pain. Without realizing she was doing it, she had opened her mouth and was speaking softly under her breath, like a stream of consciousness, trying to pry the memories free. "I was in my room. Edward was there. He was going to leave and I got scared. I did something horrible. There was so much pain. I started passing out. He was screaming my name but I couldn't move. Jacob was there."
She froze, her eyes snapping open. Jacob was there? When? She squeezed her eyes shut again, willing herself to see what was hiding just below the surface of her mind.
Bella remembered the fear in her voice as she'd cried out, "Edward, wait. No. Stop!"
"I can't," he'd gasped, and she had resigned herself to her fate; wondering what would happen, would she die here and now with Jacob hating her forever for what she'd done? She deserved all of it, deserved death.
"Bella, what's wrong?" he'd asked her, his voice panicked. "Did I hurt you? Are you alright?"
She hadn't heard him then, but she could hear him now. She'd been conscious after all, but her body had somehow cut her off from this terrible pain she was now feeling, sharp enough even in her memory to take her breath away. Now it replayed in all its intensity.
She observed what was happening as if from far away, floating on the ceiling, watching her own body below, and Edward's.
She heard her own voice screaming as though disembodied, howling in pain. She could feel her body expanding, compressing, exploding- she didn't know which but she felt like she was dying, like she would be in agony for all eternity. She would have welcomed death to rid her of this feeling.
"I didn't bite you," Edward kept saying, his voice rising in panic as her screams of agony intensified. "I didn't bite you."
And then Jacob was there. But it felt like time had passed… in her agony, time seemed meaningless, stretching forever. It could have been a second or a year for all she knew, but then Jacob was with her and Edward… Edward was gone. She didn't care about any of it. She wanted death to take her, to pull her away from this life that was full of so much pain.
Jacob gathered her up in his arms and he was speaking to her but she couldn't hear, she couldn't see anymore, everything was nothing and it was all fading away. But his presence was an anchor- warm and comforting. From high above the scene, Bella watched herself go limp, out for good now, but held on to life by the warm arms and steady presence of Jacob Black.
The sound of footsteps on the stairs interrupted her thoughts, and she recognized the steps as Charlie's and not Jacob's. She hated the idea of facing Jacob again, and she was not looking forward to the ride to Emily's. He seemed to be putting her infidelity aside for now in favour of more important priorities, such as getting her safe, but she knew it was going to turn into a fight sometime. He was angry, and rightly so. Beyond angry, she realized. Betrayed, hurt, appalled, and deeply wounded… the English language didn't seem to have a word strong enough to define what he must have been feeling right now. There was no way she could blame him, but still, she dreaded it.
There was a quick tap on her door so she said "Come in" as she started to sit up, negotiating her much larger mass into place with some difficulty. Charlie saw her struggling and quickly slid an arm around her back, helping her up and then putting some pillows behind her back so she could sit comfortably.
"Thanks," she said, a bit embarrassed.
"No problem," he answered gruffly, sitting down on the bed next to her. "I used to do the same thing for your mom when you were causing her grief."
"Have you called her?" Bella asked, panic suddenly gripping her chest. She hadn't given one thought to her mother, and hated the idea of her finding out something like this when she was ten thousand miles away and unable to do anything. Her mind flickered to the tickets to Florida that Edward had bought her, still sitting in the drawer of her nightstand. The date was open; she could go. Today if she wanted. Jacob could come. Maybe in Florida, things would look… different. For both of them.
Charlie shook his head. "No, I haven't," he said. "That's not news your mom should hear over the phone."
She was relieved. "I could go," she said hesitantly. "I have a ticket."
There was an obvious cringe to her father's words as he said, "Uh… now honey, I don't think you should be flying in your… um… condition. Planes aren't really into that when you're having a regular pregnancy, let alone…" He trailed off, shrugging. "I think Jake's idea of having you with Emily is real good."
"You do?" she asked, surprised.
"Yeah, well, Jake explained to me about the part where the Cullens can't cross into the reservation." He sighed. "Listen, Bells," he said gently. "I know you care about Edward… but he's not good for you. I've stood by long enough watching him hurt you. And now, finding out that he's a vampire, I can't say that makes me like him any more."
Jacob obviously hadn't told him the whole story, but still, she felt the shame rising in her chest as he spoke. "Dad-."
"No, hang on," he said. "Let me get this out. I know fathers are never supposed to like guys their daughters date- though I like Jake. So you've gotta take anything I say about this kid with a grain of salt. But honey… as far as anyone knows, Edward did this to you. He might not have intended it- but that means he doesn't understand what happened either. And I think you'd agree that the first thing he'd want is to protect you from that happening any further. Staying on the reservation seems like the easiest way to do that. And Emily's house will be good for you- you two are friends, aren't you? Besides, you might want another female around for all the…" He waved his hand towards her belly. "You know, for all this… this girl stuff." He cleared his throat. "Just until we figure everything out."
Bella tried to argue with some part of what he'd said, but she couldn't. Finally she sighed and said, "Fine. I'll go."
"Thanks, Bells," he said with obvious relief. "I'm not ready to go totally grey just yet." He stood and headed for the door, then turned back with an extremely uncomfortable expression on his face. "Oh, and be careful over there, okay? I think it's your safest bet but now that I know how Emily really got those scars on her face, just steer clear of those boys if they get angry, okay?"
She smiled. "Promise. If Sam stubs his toe, I'll be sure to run for cover."
He chuckled softly and then nodded. They both heard Jacob's footsteps on the stairs, and Charlie smiled at her. "Well, I'm off to work. I'll call you at Emily's tonight and make sure you're alright." He kissed the top of her head gently before leaving, nodding at Jacob as they traded places in the doorway.
Jacob picked up her backpack and set it on the end of her bed. Then he went to the closet and started grabbing clothes at random, not even looking at her.
Bella watched him for a long moment before she dared to speak. "How long are you packing me up for?" she asked, trying to make her voice light.
"Just a couple of days," he answered shortly. "Until we have a plan. Then you can either come home or get more stuff."
"I'm not going to fit into any of those clothes anyway," she said softly.
Jacob hesitated as he folded the last of her shirts into the bag. "Right," he said. "I hadn't thought of that." He glanced at her belly, then back into the bag. "I'll ask Sue… I know there are a couple of girls on the Rez who've had babies in the last six months or so… maybe she can organize some hand-me-downs."
"Thanks," she said, getting to her feet with some difficulty. She reached for his hand but he pulled away.
"Don't."
"Jake. I thought-"
"What?" he cut her off, looking at her for the first time since coming into the room. "You thought what? That we were better?"
"What you said last night…" she trailed off.
"I said I wanted to protect my child," he answered shortly. "And you. I don't want you to die, Bella. I've been fighting against that for God knows how long and I'll be damned if I stop now. But us? I don't know about us… or if there even is an us anymore. I just have to get you to Emily's where you'll be safe, then I can let myself actually think about this."
"I'm so sorry," she whispered.
Jacob ignored her words and the pain on her face, or didn't notice it. "For now, Charlie called the school and said you're sick," he said. "We'll stick with that until we figure this out. We have to make sure that as little people know as possible."
"Have you heard from Sam?" she asked, his words reminding her that Jacob had promised Carlisle would be questioned.
"He's due back this afternoon," he said, shaking his head. "I told him you're going to be staying with Emily. He'll come by there as soon as he can."
"What about Abi?" she asked, already dreading the idea. Just three short months ago, Bella had worked so hard to win Jacob away from Abi, and now the girl had received a message telling her that because of Bella's betrayal, her help was needed. The shame was overwhelming.
"My dad called me this morning to say that she's on her way," he answered, not sounding completely thrilled about the idea himself.
"Just her?" Bella asked incredulously.
"No," Jacob answered. "I don't think she goes anywhere alone, actually." He zipped her bag up and handed it to her. "I'll get your toothbrush," he said, disappearing from her room for a moment before returning and sliding the brush into her backpack. Then he gave her his hands, pulling her to her feet, and helped her dress in a pair of sweat pants and a baggy t-shirt that was still a bit too small. She felt fat and ugly, not to mention terrible about the steely cold, mechanical way he helped her, like she was a task to get done and nothing more. The way he was ignoring the problem was worse than if they were fighting... fighting meant the possibility of a make-up. This just left her feeling hopeless.
They walked down to her truck and Jacob helped her into the passenger seat before going around to the driver's side, slipping the key into the ignition and revving the engine before pulling out into the road.
The first half of the drive passed in silence and eventually Jacob turned the radio on, if only to make that silence less uncomfortable. Bella laid her face against the cool glass of her window, pretending to admire the scenery as the pine trees whipped by the side of the car. She had almost dozed off when she heard Jacob's sharp intake of breath. A moment later, the radio suddenly clicked off, and Bella turned toward Jacob to see his jaw set tightly as his eyed flickered back and forth between the road and the rearview mirror.
She looked back and saw a silver car gaining on them rapidly, which was surprising since they were on La Push Road, which led only to the Rez and wasn't frequented by very many drivers. Only when the car got a little closer did she recognize that it was Edward's, and her heart skipped a beat.
"What the hell does he think he's doing?" Jacob growled, pushing his foot down on the gas to try to increase the distance between them.
In the rear-view mirror, Bella saw Edward waving to them, obviously trying to get them to pull over.
"There's no way I'm stopping so don't even think about it," he snapped, even though she hadn't said a word, and even as Edward's car kept gaining on them. Bella knew that Edward could drive at speeds that humans or even werewolves wouldn't be comfortable at, so trying to outrun him was pointless, even if her truck had been capable of it. But she held her tongue, letting Jacob discover that for himself.
Finally, Edward caught up with the truck, passed it, and then slammed on his brakes abruptly a little ways up from them, the car coming to a stop horizontally across the road, blocking it completely. Jacob was forced to stop, but Bella could tell that he was seething. For a moment she wondered what would happen if he shifted while in the driver's seat, but she knew she didn't really want to find out the answer to that question.
"Bella," Jacob said, his voice surprisingly calm. "Stay in this car."
"Jake-"
"Bella," he said again, his voice so powerful she was a little taken aback. "Please. Just stay here. We have no idea what could happen if you go near him."
"Then I won't," she said softly. "I'll stay behind you the whole time. I need to hear."
It looked like it took every ounce of his control not to argue further, but he only closed his eyes briefly, opened them again, and said, "Fine." He slammed his door hard as he exited the truck, and Edward was already walking towards them. Bella got herself out of the truck with some difficulty and no help from Jacob, following him as quickly as she could, considering her new waddle and the extra pounds she was carrying.
"Jacob, I'm sorry I had to do that," Edward said, holding up his hands palms out as Jacob strode towards him, his fists clenched at his side.
One of Jacob's fists shot out without warning and connected with Edward's face. Bella could hear a loud cracking which she assumed to be the bones in Jacob's hand shattering, but when Edward's face came back around he had a small, jagged crack in his cheek. Jacob flexed his hand, realigning the bones so they wouldn't heal crooked. He had a smirk on his face as he said, "That was so worth it."
"Jacob-" Edward started, the fissure already sealing over, but his words were cut off as Jacob grabbed a fistful of his hair and pushed down, forcing him to his knees. He pressed his other hand over where the crack had been, holding it there so long the space between his palm and Edward's cheek started to sizzle, twisting Edward's face in pain.
Bella couldn't stand it anymore. "Stop it," she cried. "Jacob, please."
Slowly, Jacob pulled back, but he pointed a finger in Edward's face, showing that there would be retribution if Edward was to stand again. "You didn't have to run us off the road," he snapped. "You chose to do this. What's the matter with you, huh? We are less than a mile from the Rez. You're pushing it so fucking hard right now. Do you want me to kill you?"
"No," he said, holding up his hands. "And I know where we are… that's why I had to catch up with you quickly." His eyes moved to Bella, then back to Jacob's angry face. "I had to talk to you before you went somewhere I couldn't follow."
"Don't even look at her," Jacob growled. "You might hurt her again."
Bella saw the pain flash through Edward's eyes, but he said nothing.
"Alright, you wanted to talk," Jacob snapped. "So talk."
"I wanted to tell Bella how sorry I am," Edward said. "I didn't get a chance to before and-"
"Great, I'm sure she accepts," Jacob interrupted. "Anything else?"
Edward ignored him pointedly. "Bella, I want you to know that Carlisle is doing everything he can to-"
"Sam will be filling us in on that later," Jacob said, cutting him off again.
Bella touched Jacob's arm lightly. "The faster you let Edward to finish the faster we can go, right?" she reasoned softly. Jacob's eyes flickered towards her momentarily to acknowledge that he'd heard her, but he didn't answer. His jaw was so tense she was afraid it might snap.
Edward went on, "You'll never know how truly sorry I am for hurting you, Bella. But there's something you need to know." His eyes locked with Jacob's for a moment as he added, "Though it might be difficult to hear."
"Just spit it out, leech," Jacob ground out.
"It's possible for a vampire and a human to have a child."
"What?" Jacob's voice was strangled. Bella's heart caught in her throat, but she said nothing, waiting.
"Sparing you the details," Edward said, "it is possible for a male vampire to father the child of a female human. It's happened before… but it is rare. The pregnancies are accelerated. The mothers' bodies usually can't handle it, and most of the time they die." He turned his eyes to Bella and she could see that they were full of fear. "Bella, we have to get rid of that thing before it kills you."
"What?" Now it was Bella's turn to be appalled. She wrapped her arms protectively around her belly, following an instinct she didn't even realize she had. At first she had been horrified of the changes that her body had gone through, but she was slowly coming to terms with it. And killing her baby? How could Edward suggest that?
"Bella, get back in the car," Jacob said sharply.
"Please, Bella," Edward implored her, getting to his feet as Jacob's attention became divided. But he still held his hands out in a motion of calm. "This baby is going to kill you."
"It's not your baby," Jacob hissed. "Bella and I slept together in Canada. She had the flu after we got back… at least she thought it was the flu. She was already pregnant when you made this happen to her."
Edward looked taken aback, and also a little hurt. Bella wondered if he'd thought that she had still been a virgin up to the night before. "Are you sure about that?" he asked flatly. "Are you absolutely sure this is your child?"
"You are so far out of line right now," Jacob snapped, taking a step towards Edward, his dark eyes narrowed tightly in anger.
"I'm telling you, this is how it happens. This kind of pregnancy lasts a few weeks. Maybe a month. This is exactly how it happens… and if we don't do something, this baby is going to kill her."
"How do you know that?" Bella whispered.
"There are stories about children like this, and what they're capable of." Looking at Jacob once again he added, "What if you're wrong? What if this is my child? We have to stop this from happening to her. You can always have another baby. I won't do a thing to stop you, I promise. I just want her safe."
"Don't you think that's what I want too?" Jacob bit out. He looked at Bella, then back to Edward. "We will talk about this. Bella, me, and the pack. You're not needed. Now move your car out of our way or I'll move it for you."
"Please," Edward whispered, his golden eyes locked on Bella again. "Please don't go through with this."
Jacob took her arm and led her back to the truck, and Edward made no move to follow them. Slowly, he went to his car and got behind the wheel, backing up enough to let them drive by. She looked out the window as they passed him, and saw the naked terror in his eyes as she crossed over the invisible line that would separate them until she passed over it again. She looked at Jacob and recognized with a jolt that he was crying; his face was contorted and tears were sliding down his cheeks.
She was used to his strength, not this anguish, and yet she felt powerless to comfort him because she was responsible for how he was feeling, and she feared his rejection more than anything. But, tentatively, she forced herself to move across the bench seat and tuck herself into his side; to her surprise, he wrapped an arm around her and pulled her as close as he could, holding her tightly. She wrapped an arm around his waist and closed her eyes, focusing on the steady thump, thump, thump of his heart and hoping against hope that Edward was wrong.
Sam was sitting on the front step of Emily's house when Jacob coasted the truck to a stop in the driveway. Bella watched as Emily emerged from the house and trailed her hand through his hair; he tipped his chin up and smiled at her, and in that smile Bella saw how powerful his love for her was. Imprinting was a fascinating thing to observe, yet frightening for her to imagine when it came to Jacob. She didn't like to think about how easily he could suddenly lose all interest in her and fall head-over-heels for some girl he might have only just met. And where would that leave her? Bitter and resentful like Leah? That was definitely not what she wanted.
But maybe for Jacob, it would be kinder. To forget her, move on with someone else, someone who would delight in his attention and be with him forever. She wanted him to be happy, yet all around her were the shambles of the misery she'd caused.
Next to her, Jacob inhaled deeply and then exhaled again in a long, shaky breath. He wiped the tears from his face and looked into her eyes. His were so brown they were almost black; they were deep and soft- tortured. She had to blink back her own tears as she found his hand and squeezed it lightly.
Jacob started to squeeze back, and then abruptly dropped her hand. She watched his eyes shut her out like a physical wall dropping. "Emily's house might as well be Fort Knox," he said. "So you're safe." He was relieved, but why? Because he was afraid for her, or because now he could leave her without any guilt? "Come on," he said, getting out of the truck.
She noticed that he seemed almost comforted by the idea of talking to Sam, and she realized how much Jacob depended on Sam to take charge. She knew that Jacob had the birthright to be leading the pack, but he'd refused that responsibility and left Sam as the leader. Sometimes Bella thought that Sam resented Jacob for that, and sometimes she thought he was happy to be the one that the rest of the pack went to for guidance and support. It was a complicated relationship to say the least.
Bella got out of the car too, and Sam immediately grew serious as he saw them, and he stood up, stepping off the porch and walking out to meet them. Emily trailed quickly behind him and stopped in front of Bella, surprising her by putting her hand on her belly, her eyes huge.
"Oh my God, Bella," she gasped, giving Bella's stomach a light squeeze as though she couldn't quite accept what she was seeing. "Sam told me, but… I can't believe it."
"Yeah," Bella said quietly. "Me neither."
"Well, congratulations!" Emily added quickly, beaming and throwing her arms around Bella. She squeezed her back awkwardly, used to Emily's hugs but not used to having this giant lump coming between their bodies. As Emily released her, she rubbed her hand over Bella's back and gave her a sympathetic look. "I can't imagine how you're feeling," she said gently.
"Bella," Sam's booming voice spoke up, drawing her attention away from Emily for the moment. His eyes weren't angry, but they weren't particularly kind either. "If you need to lay down, feel free to go upstairs and rest."
It was tempting, and part of her wanted to flee his judgment, but she wanted to be in on this conversation, considering the fact that it was all about her. "No," she said. "I'm okay."
Sam nodded and gestured for them to follow him indoors. As she often did, Emily defaulted to the kitchen, stirring a large pot of something on the stove and then checking something in the oven before pulling a large bowl out of the cupboard and starting to gather ingredients for what looked to be some kind of dessert. Bella was sure it would be mouthwatering, but for now her attention was on Sam, who led them into the living room where he sat down with Jacob on the small sofa.
Bella eyed the armchair across from them and waddled over to it, gripping the arms of it and preparing to collapse backward into it. To her amusement, Sam leapt to his feet and started towards her to help, but she was down before he reached her, and sheepishly he returned to his place. But his face had already turned serious even before he'd sat down again. He looked from Bella to Jacob, considering his words for a moment.
Finally he said, "I spoke with the Cullens."
This was followed by a pause so long that Jacob finally said impatiently, "And?"
Sam let out a long breath, and Bella braced herself for what was coming next. He said, "They seem to think that this baby is Edward's."
"I know," Jacob said quietly. "Cullen confronted us on the way over here and told us as much."
"What else did he tell you?" Sam asked tensely. He flicked his eyes in Bella's direction, but she straightened her back and made herself seem calm and ready for anything, even hearing all of this again. She could tell that Emily was pretending not to listen.
"I know he thinks the baby has to die," Jacob answered. His voice was flat, detached almost, and Bella didn't know how to read his tone at all. It scared her.
Sam nodded. "Yeah," he said heavily. "Carlisle related some stories about similar children… it sounds like legends mostly- hearsay. But we can't be sure." His eyes slid to Bella again as he added apologetically, "We have to consider the seriousness of what they're saying."
Jacob's body stiffened. "What do you mean by that?"
"The fact that Bella's body has gone from no obvious pregnancy to nearly ready to give birth in such a short time indicates that this might be Cullen's baby. If it is a half-vampire baby, then that puts her life in danger."
On some level Bella realized he was discussing her fate, but she somehow felt disconnected from what he was saying, as though it was some other Bella, some other pregnancy, some other life. Not her.
"But what if there's another explanation?" Jacob asked through gritted teeth, his jaw tensing. "What if it's my baby?"
"I know," Sam answered, his voice surprisingly gentle. "But what if it's not? We have to plan for the worst case scenario, not the best."
"I won't kill my own child," Jacob answered vehemently, the first sign of real emotion since his breakdown in the car. The passion in his words cut through the foggy feeling that seemed to cling to Bella's mind and she blinked several times.
"You're not touching it," she said, her voice sounding a bit hollower than she'd intended. Both young men turned to look at her; in the kitchen, Emily froze and gave up any pretenses of not listening. They all waited, so she said again, "You're not touching it. No one's killing this baby."
"Bella," Sam said quietly. "I know it's a horrible idea to consider, but-"
"No," she cut him off. "We're not considering it. It's my choice. I don't care what you think."
"But Bella, it could hurt you," he protested. "It could kill you."
"I decided a long time ago that dying for someone you love was a good way to go," she said softly. "And you said it yourself- they're just stories. Maybe it won't do anything to me… even if it is Edward's."
Jacob had remained silent since she'd started talking, but now he said bitterly, "Is that what you're hoping? That it's his?"
She closed her eyes briefly. "No, Jake… of course not." And she meant it.
"Do you love it?" Sam asked her bluntly.
Bella was so startled by the question that she just answered it without thinking, "No." She watched Sam and Jacob exchange a look and added quickly, "But I could." She spread her palms lightly over her belly and she pushed inward with them; a moment later she was rewarded with a sharp kick for her efforts. It hurt, but it was also strangely beautiful. Something- someone- was in there. Her someone... hers and Jacob's, she hoped. She'd heard what Jacob had said earlier- what if her flu had been morning sickness? What if all of Edward's fears were unfounded? She imagined a brown-eyed, chubby-cheeked, black-haired baby floating inside her, with Jacob's impish grin. How could they think of killing that? Something so beautiful?
Sam and Jacob both jumped a little as the baby moved again, its little elbow or knee pressing through her shirt, but she just gazed down at her belly and whispered softly, "It's so alive."
"We could get a paternity test," Jacob said, after a short silence had passed between them. Emily went back to her work in the kitchen.
"We could," Sam agreed, obviously choosing his words carefully. "But if it is your baby, Jake, then that begs the question of why this acceleration happened at all." Bella could see that Sam believed the baby was Edward's. She tried to imagine what she believed, but she couldn't. She knew what she wanted- for all of this to go back to the way it had been the day before. But as to who was the father… she couldn't even think about that right now. She could barely even accept that this was happening, let alone consider the details. It was true she didn't love this stranger nestled under her ribcage… but that didn't mean she could make the leap that Sam was making, that she believed she should kill it to save herself from the possibility of death. That seemed so wrong somehow.
"Maybe Abi will know," Jacob spoke up, his voice hopeful.
"Maybe," Sam agreed, his own voice neutral. "We'll hold off on any decision-making until she's arrived. Bella, it's really important that you stay on the reservation until we figure this out… we have no idea what's happening and we don't want to risk this pregnancy accelerating any more than it has."
Bella nodded. "I know," she said.
Emily took that as her cue to pipe up cheerfully, "Sam has patrol tonight, so you and me will have a slumber party. It'll be great."
Bella managed a small smile at the older girl. "Yeah," she said, not really able to put any enthusiasm into her voice. "Sure, that sounds fun."
"Great," Emily answered, and Bella caught a glance that went from her to Sam, prompting Sam to stand up quickly.
"Come on, Jake," he said, giving him a brotherly slap on the back. "I think it'll do you some good to go for a run."
"No safer place to be than with me, Jake," Emily said gently. "You know that." It was true Sam kept her house- and her in general- well guarded, so if there was anywhere that Bella could expect to be reasonably protected, it was here. That's why Jacob had brought her here, after all.
"Just… call me if anything happens," Jacob urged her. "I'll be back later." Bella nodded, wishing for him to touch her or hug her goodbye, but he only nodded and turned to go.
After he'd followed Sam out the door she realized she was gazing wistfully after him when Emily cleared her throat and said playfully, trying to lighten the mood, "You two are going to have such a cute baby."
In lieu of a reply, Bella burst into tears, but instead of growing uncomfortable or being at a loss for what to do as some others might have been, Emily came over and knelt down in front of the chair, gathered Bella into her arms, and held her until her tears stopped. It was exactly what she needed, and for the first time since this nightmare had started, she felt something that bordered on safety and security.
"You're not going to believe me right now," Emily said gently as she threaded her fingers absently through Bella's hair, soothing her with the light touch. "But this too shall pass. Everything does, you know."
"Not fast enough," Bella managed, sniffling lightly.
"No, I know," Emily answered softly, her voice full of sadness and understanding. "Nothing's ever fast enough."