Jacob padded through the forest on silent paws, the moon bathing the forest in gentle blue-white light. The way his mind was racing over the events of the last few days, sleep was not going to come easily, but he'd decided that a run might just do the trick and tire him out. Embry and Sam were on patrol, but both of them were quiet enough and respectful enough that for all intents and purposes he could ignore them, and their occasional thoughts were just a gentle murmur in the back of his mind. They neither pried into his own thoughts, nor commented when they did slip through the link.

He made his way to the cliffs, skirting along the edges of the jagged rocks that plunged into the cold, dark expanse of the Pacific Ocean. Not so many generations ago, his ancestors had fashioned canoes from the trees of this forest and launched them into the sea, stalking whales larger than the boats they hunted from. Rarely, Jacob had seen a whale from the cliff face, given away by its tell-tale spout of water, or the quick rise of flank or tail, but normally the sea at this hour seemed devoid of life, thick and mysterious, and the gloomy clouds that hung low over the ocean tonight reflected his mood well. He sat down on his haunches and let out a very heavy sigh, staring out at all that whipping surf and rolling waves.

A branch snapping behind him distracted him and he whirled quickly, part of him admittedly hoping for a fight, wishing that one of the Cullens- hopefully Edward- would break the treaty and come on to their land, give him an outlet for his anger, an excuse to draw first blood. He knew his pack would win a war with the vampires. It was the reason that the treaty had been made at all; they were no match for them. And yet they lived, even now, even after what had happened, because the treaty didn't make specific reference to this. They couldn't bite a human. But influence? Manipulate? Control? Seduce? Hurt? The treaty was silent on those subtleties, and because it was silent, he had to remain still. It was beyond aggravating.

The branch behind him had not broken under the feet of a vampire. Instead, a wolf stepped gracefully forward out of the foliage. It was significantly smaller than Jacob, its coat dark brown, nearly black, and interspersed throughout the fur were flecks of creams and grays. The soft, near-black eyes looked on Jacob with tenderness and warmth, yet it was silent to him, its thoughts a mystery.

Quickly he shifted to human form, pulling on the pair of cutoffs he had tied to his leg for just such a necessity. "Iniabi," he acknowledged her, using her full name, not sure exactly what was proper and what was not. He had taken note of her correcting Veyo about her status here, yet he still felt the need to tread lightly, unsure as to how much respect she expected.

The wolf padded to the edge of the cliff and looked down, gazing at the water for a moment. Then she too shifted back to human form, taking a seat on the cool, moss-covered rock, her bare legs dangling over the edge, the wind stroking the soles of her feet. She crossed her arms over her chest as he sat next to her, realizing her nakedness would make him uncomfortable. She gave him a small, tender smile as he joined her.

"Jacob," she said. "Please, don't feel the need for formalities. I'm a guest in your homeland, and you are one of my people. We are family."

He gazed at her pretty face for a long moment, wondering how different his life would be now if he had chosen a different path- to marry this girl, as had been planned, and start a drastic new life in her village. But despite the fact that they hadn't married, he had completed a ritual that made him as much a part of the tribe as if he'd been born into it. Her acceptance put him immediately at ease.

His sigh was long and full of the misery that had dominated the last few days, yet he hesitated to dive into that subject with her. Instead he asked, "Why can't I hear you when you're a wolf? Your thoughts, I mean."

"Your link is somewhat different than ours," she answered. "If you had stayed and joined our warriors and integrated into their pack, you would be able to hear us. But our link is not open. And neither is yours."

"So I'm still an outsider," he said, surprised at how disappointing that felt. "On that level anyway."

She curled her soft fingers over his arm and gave a little squeeze. "You are one of our people, Jacob," she said. "You belong. If you had chosen a path other than the one of the warrior, that link would still be silent to you. Don't feel excluded."

He nodded thoughtfully. "So anyone who's not a warrior can't hear you?"

"All can hear me," she clarified. "But I am queen. Otherwise, no. The warriors hear each other, and there are other groups that hear each other, but I am the only common thread who sees all."

"What about Mitsis?" he asked, thinking about the fact that she embodied the phrase 'sees all.'

Abi smiled. "Mitsis is grateful for the quiet of her mind. Often it is the only sanctuary she has. But the warrior caste is the only clan the Quileute have left, Jacob," she explained. "You only require one link. It's why your women shift so infrequently."

"Tell that to Leah," he said. "She'd have something to say if you accused her of not being a warrior."

"What an interesting young woman she is," Abi remarked. "So full of anger."

Jacob shrugged. "Yeah, she's… interesting." He smirked.

"She reminds me of your grandmother, in a way," Abi offered.

He was surprised. He knew his grandmother had been born in Abi's village, and that her daughter- his mother- had spent time there as a child. But he hadn't realized… "You met her?"

"I knew her well," Abi agreed, sounding surprised herself that he didn't know that. "She was a very strong woman. It was a sad time when she chose to go to your grandfather. Often the daughters of the Quileute came to us, but rarely had we let a daughter of our own go to them. She was brave though, and she followed her heart. Your grandfather beckoned her until she couldn't refuse." She smiled warmly, as though remembering a fond memory of an old friend. Jacob couldn't help but smile too. It still seemed crazy to think that this woman, her face so youthful and her manner so precocious and free-spirited, was in fact old enough to have known his grandmother personally.

"I never heard that story," he said. "My mother died when I was little."

"Yes, I know that," she said sympathetically. "You and I have that in common… we both lost our mothers far too young."

Abi's mother had died almost two years ago, and when she'd inherited her queenship it had triggered her need for a husband, and eventually Jacob had been contacted. That all seemed so long ago… not just three months. He find it difficult to ask the question, but he forced out hesitantly, "So... have you found a new fiancé?"

She shook her head. "My position requires an heir," she said. "But I hope one won't be needed for some time. My marriage to you was arranged long ago, and it seemed natural to proceed accordingly, but many things have changed."

"What about your prophecy?" he asked delicately, knowing that at her crowning- or whatever their equivalent was- Mitsis had predicted, essentially, that their society would fall within the span of Abi's rule, calling the need for an heir into question.

"It stands," she answered softly. "It always will. I will raise a strong daughter. My hope is that she will survive the fall. Perhaps I will send her to be fostered here, if there is warning of looming dangers." Her smile was sad but not at all bitter. "I must admit I don't look forward to dying alone. I try not to think about it much." Her body gave a tiny tremble.

"Are you cold?" he asked. "Or is it the topic?"

"A little cold," she answered, giving him a soft smile. Her eyes said he was right on both counts, but he let the lie slip past without comment. Jacob wrapped an arm around her, tucking her against his side. She was warm, warmer than a human for sure, but he was even hotter- as she'd said, an adaptation against vampires. Her body was small and delicate, her bare skin soft against his. He tried to think of unsexy things so as not to embarrass himself, though he was too preoccupied to actually feel turned on- she was a beautiful naked girl nestled up against him, and he had more hormones than a guy on steroids. It was inevitable, but he ignored it as best he could.

"So tell me, little brother," she said tenderly, the words not at all patronizing. "Did you make the right choice, leaving us?"

Her question was so gentle, so unassuming, that Jacob felt a fissure develop in the strong face he'd been wearing for everyone, and he found he couldn't hide his pain from her as easily as he could from his own pack.

She saw his face crumble and her own eyes shone with unshed tears of sympathy, as though his pain was infectious, as though somehow the weight of it fell on her, too. Now it was Abi's turn to hold him, pulling him close to her and rubbing her hand gently over his back. Though she was smaller than him, she cradled him easily, and he cried into the soft curve of her neck as he clung to her, drawing on her calm presence to soothe him.

After he'd calmed down a little, still sniffling lightly into her shoulder, it became harder to ignore her breasts pressed against his chest, and abruptly he pulled away, blushing. She hid them again behind her arm and gave him a small smile, conveying both sympathy and amusement. "I'm sorry, Jacob," she said gently. "If I had something to cover myself with, I would. I know nudity is not so acceptable in your culture."

"It's not that," he said. "It's just…" He trailed off, embarrassed.

But her eyes were twinkling with humour and she wasn't going to let this one go. "They're just a body part," she pointed out.

He made a face. "Yeah, but… they're…" His blush deepened until his russet skin had turned quite scarlet. "Come on, Abi, you know."

Like a fish on a hook, she made the decision to release him, not teasing him further, saying only, "Your mother should have nursed you longer, and you wouldn't have these strange feelings."

Jacob laughed, but then his humour faded abruptly and his face fell again, thinking once more of her question. "I've made so many mistakes," he whispered.

"Have you?" she asked softly, changing gears easily with him.

"I should have stayed," he said. "I should have stayed in that community… with you."

"Should you?" she asked. "I mean, did the reasons you had to leave turn out to be false?"

"I don't know," he answered after a moment's thought. "I left for a lot of reasons. But one of the big ones was Bella. And now…" He trailed off. Even saying her name hurt, because every time he thought it, he imagined how it sounded on that bloodsucker's lips as their bodies writhed together.

Every time he thought of her beautiful brown eyes, his mind started to wonder how she had looked at him, or if those eyes had darkened with passion as he touched her. When he imagined the cute way she chewed on her lip when she was nervous, he wondered if she had bitten her lip in excitement for him. And when he thought of her ears, the adorable way they stuck out, he imagined Edward nibbling on her earlobes, driving her wild.

Every part of her was now tied up with him. It was like an obsession, and his thoughts now couldn't separate the two. It was true the girl he loved still existed, but now it felt like there had been another girl underneath, an ugly, disloyal girl who had laid in wait until an opportunity presented itself to give herself to Edward, and she had jumped without looking back, without considering him at all.

Abi was gazing at him, her dark eyes gentle, thoughtful, as she looked at him. "Why do you think our Great Mother gives us pain?" she asked finally.

He let out a sigh. "Oh, Abi," he said, his voice tired. "I don't believe in your goddess… I'm sorry."

Instead of being offended or hurt as he'd thought she might be, she only smiled. "She is not like that 'God' so many in your society are fond of," she said. "She asks for no worship, She isn't jealous, and She doesn't require faith. She simply is- She exists in everything, and She is everywhere."

"What, she doesn't mind if I say she's not real?" he asked skeptically. "That she doesn't matter to me?"

Abi shrugged. "Does the ocean care whether you believe in it? You'll still get wet if you walk into the waves. And does a mountain lion care whether it has hurt your feelings or taken your future when it eats you? It is merely hungry. Our Great Mother needs neither our belief nor our love, yet she gives both without prejudice. You are a spark that grew from Her womb and you were birthed into this world with good intentions- along with everything else. You are no more or less important than any other living thing on this planet. No more or less important than Her."

In spite of himself, he was curious. "But don't we need to be good to other people and stuff or she'll send us to hell or something? Or reincarnate us as a gnat?" He wasn't sure which afterlife they believed in.

Abi shook her head. "You're looking at Her through different eyes, Jacob. When you are gone, your life- any life- will be like a ripple in the sand, swept away by the winds of time and made smooth and innocent once again. Your mistakes are your own. Your decisions are your own. She is only the heart of the earth, without judgment, without bias. If you choose not to believe she is there, she will exist just the same. Her ground cushions your steps. Her flesh grows the lushness of the forests and the barrenness of the deserts. All is wonderful. All is valid. Even suffering. Even a gnat."

"So why do you think she sends us pain?" he couldn't help asking.

Abi thought about it for a long moment, gazing out into the ocean. Finally she said, "There is no such thing as pain without purpose. And without it, I suppose pleasure would bring us no joy at all."

A slow smile spread over Jacob's lips. "Only you would be able to conclude that suffering exists to give us joy, Abi," he said, his voice tender. It was impossible not to like this girl. A breeze lifted suddenly from the waves, slamming into them like a physical force, sending Abi's long hair whipping around her. She giggled, brushing it back from her face, and Jacob pulled her close once again. He tried to help her, sweeping the tendrils of thick dark hair back with his fingers and tucking them behind her ears.

Her eyes were beautiful, full of youth and wisdom at the same time. He knew she was old, yet her spirit seemed young and innocent. She held such responsibility on her shoulders, yet she carried it with a grace that made it seem feather-light. Her skin was a rich, light creamy brown, her lips full and her nose just slightly upturned, with a strong bridge between her impossibly dark brown eyes.

Abi reached up and lightly traced his jaw with her fingertips, sweeping them over to press firmly against his lips. Instinctually, he kissed them lightly, and a tiny smile spread over her features. "Jacob Black," she whispered gently, her eyes locked so powerfully on his he felt like he might lose himself, deliciously, inside them. "I know you feel to kiss me right now," she added, her words pulling him from the spell. "But you cannot. You don't want it."

Jacob slowly dropped his eyes from hers, gazing back out at the water, his eyes troubled. Finally, he let out a long breath. "I'm sorry," he said.

"No need," she answered. "A body is a comfort. I understand that."

"It's not just your body," he said, feeling guilty, not wanting her to think she was some kind of object to him, an outlet. "I like you. I-"

Abi held up a hand to stop him. "Your apologies are unnecessary," she said sincerely. "I'm not offended. But your heart is divided, Jacob. If we have a future beyond what is evident, now isn't the time."

He nodded. She was right; it was wrong. Though he hadn't intended at all to use her as a counter to what Bella had done to Edward, to somehow get back at her by sleeping with Abi, it now occurred to him how much it would have seemed so after the fact. He dropped his head into his hands. "How could she do this to me?" he whispered. "How could she cheat? And with him? He's my enemy. My blood enemy. She knows that."

"If she was to be unfaithful to you," Abi said very gently, "it would have always been with him. Bella made a choice with a divided heart as well, in a way. She made a conscious choice to ignore the part of herself that she felt belonged with him, so the whole of herself could go with you. It seems she may not have been as successful as she would have liked."

"But what's the point of that?" he asked, his voice thick with emotion. "What was the point of going up there and going through all that and finally, finally getting her, if she's just going to run back to him?"

"The point?" she asked, her face quizzical. "Does everything have a point?"

"It better," he answered bitterly. "Because the alternative sucks."

"My sweet brother," she said gently. "If keeping company with her brings you nothing but sadness, then cut her off as you would a weight around your ankle, and feel the freedom settle over your heart."

"But it's not that simple," he protested. "She hurt me so much, and maybe I'm just a stupid naïve kid, but I want to believe we still have a chance at the happiness we found in that cave in your village." In that cave, they had accidentally completed a simple ceremony which, under the laws of Abi's community, made them husband and wife. They were married, at least in that village. That meant something. And now he believed she was carrying his child, no matter what those bloodsuckers wanted him to think. Didn't that have to mean something, too? Could he walk away from that? Free her like a dead weight, as Abi had suggested? Slowly, he shook his head in answer to his own internal question. "I still care about her," he said softly. "And I can't just turn that off- believe me, a big part of me wants to. But I can't."

Abi reached out and laid her hand over his. "You are the only person in the world who has the power to ruin or enrich your own life," she said. "Even our Great Mother cannot claim responsibility for that. If you believe there is something worth salvaging, I think you'll grow to regret not trying."

"But how can I forgive her?" he whispered. "She betrayed me so deeply."

"In our language there is no word for betrayal," she said gently. "Nor forgiveness. Both imply finality, an end point of emotion. Perhaps it is because of our immortality, or perhaps because of something else, but not even the word 'death' in our language carries as much irrevocability as those two English words."

"So what would you say?" he asked her. "How would you describe what she did?"

Abi considered his question. Then she said, "I would say she has done wâpi'wakatewachéké." As she said the word, she put both hands palms down against her chest, closed her eyes, and then she swept her hands forward clasped tightly together in a single fist. Jacob still wasn't used to their language, which combined words and hand gestures with very little separation. But then she explained,"Loosely translated it means, 'that which forces a hopeful heart to pump only my regrets.'"

Jacob couldn't help but be amazed. It was perfect. "Abi," he said, shaking his head in disbelief. "You have got to teach me this language."

Her pretty face broke into a wide smile and she laughed before laying her head against his chest once again. In a soft, sincere voice she promised, "I'll do my very best."

After a long moment he glanced down at her and with a small smirk he said, "But could we maybe get you some clothes first?"

Abi giggled. "Yes," she said. "I think that would be appropriate."

They both shifted back to wolf form, and Jacob led the way back towards his house where he was sure he could dig up something of one of his sister's that would mostly fit her. Though her presence beside him was silent, he found it immeasurably comforting.