Chapter 20 (Epilogue): You Get Some, You Lose Some

~ Four years later in Real World Time; Seven years later in The Book Time~

Tasuki clearly remembered the first time he knelt before the Empress with such trepidation. He was twenty and was asking to be admitted into the Konan military. Now at twenty-seven, he headed the Intelligence branch of the army, which boasted of omniscience: from the most inconsequential scullery gossip to how the whispered sweet nothings between Kutou's Prime Minister and his new concubine could rock the Empire's politics. He had served his country well and decided that now was the time to put his most cherished plans into fruition.

The Empress seemed to be sharing the same thoughts for her eyes twinkled as she appraised the young man before her. "I suppose it's high time to let you go?"

"If it pleases Your Majesty." Much of his accent had been lost over years of listening to the formal speech of courtiers, but that old, underlying drawl remained. "I plan to head to Taikyouku with Chichiri. We'll see what happens then."

"How much time away do you want?"

He hesitated. "A..a year, Houki-sama. If all goes according to plan," came the hasty rejoinder.

"I regret having to do without you for so long," she said, and for a heart-stopping minute he thought he wouldn't be allowed to go. "But the border guards will hold up. They have strengthened so much over the years and your deputy overseer is, I trust, a capable man."

"He's a clever fellow, Your Majesty."

"Then I have no worries." Spreading her hands, Houki smiled. "Go and do what you must. Konan gives you its best wishes."

~010101~

The sun streamed through the apartment windows but the occupant had already been awake an hour since. Standing before the large sheet of glass he stared down at the streets below, which were all still swathed in a grey mist. Just a few blocks down the opposite road stretched a long building, a portion of its facade panelled in clear glass. Except for dots of orange streetlight and a glow from the lobby within, the building was dark.

Six months ago he was granted permission to search for her. The Creator had dropped him very conveniently in the same vicinity she was in, but Tasuki had not expected such a large and confusing city. He thought at first that both of them would find each other with no large amount of difficulty. But when months passed without his even hearing of her, he began to wonder whether she still thought of him. At any rate, he had to fulfill his promise. He would continue to look for her until his time ran out...in approximately in a week.

Gulping piping black coffee he continued watching the building exactly as he had been doing most mornings and evenings since he arrived at her world. Never having seen her, he thought about changing tactics, but the habit had grown on him. So he continued to stand at the window everyday, hoping to see that familiar flash of blonde hair and that stumbling, childish run.

This morning was different. There was a hectic feel about the way the school's doors swung open and closed every few minutes; about the way a line of cabs sat waiting at the curb as a continuous stream of students in groups of three or four piled in with monstrous packages. An almost reckless elation pervaded the air.

He emptied his cup and held the still warm glass in his hands. A new group came tumbling out of the doors, this time with misshapen blobs covered in newspaper. He had seen enough of this school's students to know that nothing was unusual for them. These new packages looked like they were separate pieces for a curious sculpture.

He was about to walk back into the kitchen when one of the girls tossed her head in an achingly familiar gesture. From her black bag hung what could have easily been a plushie, but she tossed it into the back seat of a cab before he could be sure. As she tucked her hair behind her ears in the same impatient, infantile gesture he loved so much, Tasuki couldn't help smiling. Except for her copper hair, the girl could easily have been his Lolita. He would have loved to see her face, her eyes especially, but her back was turned to him. In a minute she had slipped into the cab, giggling as she squeezed in beside a male classmate. Then they drove away and another cab cruised up to accommodate yet another group of students.

He left the window excited. It was hard to pinpoint about what, but it prompted him to make his bed and to step into the shower earlier than usual. Today, the skies figuratively broke open. He felt that he was upon her trail and would find her soon. The first clue was at Goldsmiths.

~010101~

"Really, Honey, it's not safe to drive that fast," were the first words out of Lolita's mother's mouth as her daughter swung into the hotel driveway. She had been waiting excitedly, pacing about in her room for a good half hour before deciding to just get down to the lobby to wait for Lolita's arrival. The said daughter only laughed as she stepped out of her car wearing the black dress they picked together for graduation day...and the most hideous, her mother could swear, sneakers ever created.

"Where are your heels?"

"In the –" Lolita whirled around only to see the valet take her car down to basement parking. "...car. Whoops." A girlish giggle bubbled from her throat, one that the older woman couldn't resist smiling at.

"Never mind. We'll just call to have it brought up." She hustled her daughter back into the hotel and up the suite she and her husband checked in at.

"Where's Daddy?" Lolita asked, bouncing into the room. She plopped down before the vanity table where a wide array of make up already stood waiting.

"Out to do errands," her mother replied mildly, fluttering around with a tube of liquid foundation.

From where her head had to be frozen in place, Lolita cast a look around the room. A large floral bouquet lay atop the king-sized bed. Spare surfaces were covered with flyers and bits of paper. Her father's laptop bag reclined against an armchair while suitcases covered every remaining inch of floor space.

"Gosh, your room looks as if you've moved in already."

"Most of those trunks are yours, remember?"

"Suitcases, Mommy. 'Trunks' sounds so Victorian." But she spared a more critical eye at her belongings. "Hey, where's my dolly?"

"Your mini you?" Leaning back, her mother nodded at her handiwork. "Gracious, dear, you're too old for toys. You're twenty-two and graduating today!"

"But Mom..." the beginnings of a whine tinged her tone. "You know I never go anywhere without my dolly. Someone important gave it to me."

Rolled eyes and a sigh. "Yes; somebody like an old boyfriend you'll never tell me about."

"I didn't say it was an old boyfriend," Lolita countered, eyes wide and innocent.

"Close your eyes." And a sweep of eyeshadow dashed across the younger girl's lids. "You don't have to be explicit for me to know. It's called 'mother's intuition'."

Impatiently, Lolita looked at her reflection, winking several times at her eyeshadow. "Nice. Wonder why they didn't teach this at art school?" She turned her face back up at her mother. "Someday you'll meet him. You and Dad. He promised to come back for me, you know."

"I don't see why you never talk about him. What, is he an escaped criminal?"

She coughed to conceal her laugh. Mother's intuition, indeed. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"I didn't believe plenty of things you told me fours years ago..." The fluttering hands stopped and Lolita looked up to see her mother's faraway look and tight expression. "You were hiding the same things then that you're hiding now about your 'old boyfriend'."

"Mom." She rose to hug her mother, and it was with a swell of emotion. "I can't wait for the day when I tell you everything. But for now, just believe me. When he shows up we'll come clean. He's coming very soon. I know it."

~010101~

Tasuki glanced between the flyer in his hand and the building before him. They matched. The program was supposed to start two hours ago; he had gone and dropped by Goldsmiths first hour in the morning, saw her name in the list of student exhibitors, and spent the rest of the day trying to figure out what graduation gift to get. He found it thirty minutes before the start of the program, rushed, and got stuck in a traffic jam. So he was late. Terribly late.

Older couples, presumably parents of the graduating students, had begun leaving the gallery. But the interior was still brightly lit, and expensive-looking cars continued to cruise into the driveway, discharging passengers in business suits and cocktail dresses. He couldn't have been too late. Tasuki made quick work of registration and instantly found himself lost in the middle of a sea of people. Waiters bearing trays of champagne zigzagged through crowds. A rather sizeable congregation gathered before a painting on display at one part of the room, while a crew manned the stage at the front of the room, setting up for the charity auction scheduled for later that night.

It would take a lot of luck to find a person he hadn't seen in years in a gathering of that size.

Just as he was wondering where to begin, a round of applause erupted from the group of potential buyers. He spotted the girl he was so interested in that morning before the crowd moved to the painting she was representing, completely blocking his sight of her. Feeling anticipation grow inside him, Tasuki made a beeline for the assembly. He wasn't able to see her at once, but her voice carried over clearly to him.

"Hi. My name is Lolita, and I call this piece, 'Stronghold'."

~010101~

"...this was painted from memory of a place I'm not sure I'll ever see again..." as she spoke she caught sight of a slight movement in the crowd. A flash of orange, and her breath hitched. She made out a head, a tall, well-built frame, and the owner's averted face. She couldn't be too sure, because she had been wrong so many times before, but there was something about this person that prompted her to believe.

And when the person turned to her and their gazes met, she stopped talking completely. Tears welled in her eyes.

It was him.

She wanted to dive into the audience but Tasuki smiled and motioned for her to go on. She nodded back.

"The misty mountain invites travellers to gaze upon its peak, the path to which is both fraught with peril and yet spotted with beauty. There is a secret stronghold in the heart of the pine forest, an outpost from which men with the most romantic lives look out for advancing enemies. The trail is secret, but deceptively simple."

One of the audience members wanted to know why she chose a stronghold and not the classic monastery in the mountains.

Once again Lolita's and Tasuki's eyes met. "Because the traveller may not know it...but that's where he really wants to be. The wisdom in mountain temples can be too profound; misleading to the uninitiated. But it is in the mountain stronghold that the traveller can rest unencumbered by deep philosophies."

"Will it be included in that auction?" asked a lady from the back. "What's the starting price?" Murmurs of similar curiosity rippled through the audience. Lolita only smiled.

"I'm sorry. This is the only piece in my collection that's not for sale."

A wave of protest erupted from the group, but before anyone could make himself heard the guide announced the next piece on the agenda. The group was obliged to move on, trickling away one by one until only Tasuki remained. They moved, colliding together, grabbing each other into a tight hug.

"No secret routes given away, I see." He laughed softly, kissing the top of her head. "Never thought Reikaku would look good in the moonlight."

Lolta gently pulled away from him. "Tasuki are you sure that's you?" she half-teased, half-laughed. "What happened to your drawl?"

"Lost it." He made a face. "Hard not to when you're talking to ministers all day."

"You became a diplomat?" Why did the very idea strike her as particularly comic?

"I'm in the army," he relied off-handedly. "Anyway." Producing a small box from his jacket pocket, he flicked it open. A diamond ring shone inside. "Congratulations."

Lolita looked between the box and Tasuki's grinning face. He was obviously proud of himself. She didn't want to burst his bubble but she had to ask, "Um...don't you think you've got the occasions wrong?"

"No." His smile grew wider. "Congratulations on your graduation. And once again...will you marry me?"

~Five Days Later~

The library was so still the silence buzzed. On the low table stood four cups of untouched coffee, now cold. Lolita's parents, disbelief written all over their faces, listened as their daughter told her tale. When she first began they thought she had gone right over the edge in her joy at being reunited with the young man she met and got herself engaged to all in one night. But she seemed to so believe her story that her parents did not dare to interrupt her, not even for a little knock of reality on the head.

"...and that's how Tasuki and I met." Lolita finished her story. The lovers exchanged smiles.

The parents exchanged looks. Finally, her father uncrossed his legs and leaned forward to look the fiancee straight in the eyes. "You mean," and he was speaking to his daughter, "you're engaged to a bandit who was god-gifted with super powers and who used to travel with his mage monk friend all over the universe...thing...and is now a member of an Imperial army...somewhere...as an intel man?"

"Isn't it great, Daddy?"

Said Daddy sighed, leaned back, crossed his legs, and exchanged another look with his anxious wife. "I don't know, Honey," he turned to his daughter, "that sounds like something from an RPG game plot. You didn't rip it off, did you?"

"Of course not!" Lolita grabbed Tasuki's sleeve and pushed it up. "Look, Tasuki can make his seishi symbol show on command!"

"I...I can't."

"Don't be silly. You've done it countless times before!"

Gently, he removed her hand from his arm and shook his sleeve back into place. "I can't, Lo. Not any more."

"But..."

"Taiitsukun wanted it in exchange for...six months in your world."

"You gave up... But you... It was..."

"Sweetie," her mother began, "he doesn't have to show it to us. Really. It's all right."

"But you and daddy don't believe me!" Lolita cried. "You think I'm going crazy and you think Tasuki is too and that we're both...well...retarded or something!" Digging into her bag she tossed a DVD onto the table and rose, pulling her lover with her. "We're telling the truth you've always wanted to hear! The truth I said you would never believe. And you didn't! We're going away tomorrow and getting married in Konan soon and I may never ever see you guys again and you won't even try to believe me!"

"You're too old for fairytales, Princess."

"But apparently I'm not old enough to stop being your "Princess", Daddy," she retorted with more spite than she intended to. "Sometimes, you know, things come true because you have faith in them. Good thing I have enough faith for the three of us." Muttering about being excused she stomped away, leaving the library door agape for all curious ears outside.

"I'll talk to her," Tasuki offered with a short bow. "Excuse me." And he, too, ran out after Lolita.

If there was something to still be thankful for, it was that she didn't shut her door in his face. Following her to her room Tasuki quietly pushed it closed. She was sitting on the bed with her back to him. He crawled over to place his hands on her shoulders. "Don't get so upset."

"Since when were you the pacifist?" she snapped, but it was with the hint of a sniffle.

"Army detail teaches you plenty of things," he sighed. "Come on. You knew your parents wouldn't be able to swallow our story. No other person in this world could. Except maybe Miaka," he added with a mumble.

Surprisingly, she didn't bite back. Lolita wrapped her arms around herself, tucked her legs underneath her and softly replied, "I'm not mad at my parents. I've been through that before. I'm...disappointed in myself. It's frustrating. How come when people come up to ask me about my work they know how to feel? They can forget reason for the sake of simple understanding. I thought that of all people, my parents would be the ones who could unquestioningly believe in me."

"But Konan's not a painting, Lo," he said, pulling her close and resting his chin on her shoulder. "Being told that their daughter's going away with a man they've never met before and who claims to be from another world is not a painting; especially not when that daughter might never, ever return."

"No," she agreed, "it's an ugly piece of art. God, I never thought art could be ugly until now." Her eyes found the alarm clock on her bed stand. Eleven forty-five pm. At the hall outside the door to the masters' bedroom opened and closed. Extricating herself from Tasuki's grasp Lolita hopped out of bed to rummage her shelves for paper and a pen. There was no pen, but she found a crayon.

"You're going to draw now?" Tasuki asked as she plopped down before her drafting table.

She smiled, though he couldn't see it. "There are fifteen minutes left for me in this world. I could choose to spend it cuddling and ranting with you, or I could do something worthwhile."

"And drawing is more worthwhile than cuddling and ranting?"

This time she turned around so he saw her weak grin. "Who said I was just drawing?"

~010101~

It was just past midnight when she tiptoed down the hall to her daughter's room. Light still shone from under the door. She knocked. There was no answer. She called for her daughter. There was still no answer. Finally, she pushed the door open and stood, uncertain, at the threshold. Everything was in order – the messy kind of lived-in order that Lolita had always insisted upon. Her canvases and sketchpads were all neatly filed away in the large corner shelf. Her pink nightgown still hung over the large armchair in front of the TV. Except for the silence, nothing was out of the ordinary.

She stepped into her daughter's room. The bed was a little dishevelled – wrinkled, like it had been slept on; and the blanket fell all over it instead of being thrown back as would usually happen when the occupants got out. She began to get a little worried about her daughter's absence, but a strange sort of calm seemed to tell her that her darling was all right; that Lolita was safe, and that she was happy.

As she sat upon the edge of the empty bed and smoothed a hand over the covers, she felt as if she was a mother to a child who had just died. The calm was there, but it was so still and so numb. And though she knew that a "better place" existed, she couldn't seem to get herself to part with her child.

She reached over to take the planner lying on the nightstand. Plans for the coming months had already been jotted down. A piece of paper – parchment, she had been informed plenty of times before – was tucked between the pages. She slipped it out. "Dear Mommy," it began, "I'm sorry I yelled at you and Daddy tonight..." And the precious thing spoke about a DVD.

She rushed back down to the library. The disc was still where Lolita had tossed down. Picking it up, she hurried back to her daughter's room, popped it into the player, and waited.

It was home video; a little fuzzy at first and punctuated with loudly whispered instructions. As it cleared, she made out the warm lighting of a theater stage and a shiny black grand piano in the center.

"Is it recording, Tasuki?"

"I think so," came the reply. An unladylike scramble later and Lolita was before the piano, violin in her hands, smiling at the camera.

"Hey Mommy! I thought I'd leave you and Daddy a little keepsake. It isn't much, but it's the best I could think of. I hope you like it."

Tears sprung from her eyes when she recognized the first notes. The crafty little thing had brought along a recording of the piano accompaniment and was playing Pachelbel's Canon with it in the background.

"Remember the first time I played it?"

She did, indeed. Lolita was seven years old. Mother and daughter glared at each other the whole time, the former urging her to smile, the latter stubbornly wanting to disobey. The child's smile was funny. Very, very funny. Now she wished she had taken a picture of it.

"I was so scared to play for your friends, but you told me it was your favourite."

And so it was. Everything Lolita played in the video were things she had been told were her mother's favourites. That mother now marvelled how she remembered them all.

She bowed at the end of the private concert. Her mother's final glimpse of her daughter was of that daughter sitting on the piano stool, the overhead lights throwing harsh shadows over her quivering expression. "Just think of my going away as a really, really, really long vacation." And she paused to nod above the camera. In another short moment her fiancee, looking sheepish, joined her at her perch. "Tasuki didn't want to come on camera, but I said he had to so that his parents-in-law's friends would see how great of a son-in-law he was...or is it 'going to be'? Anyway."

Her mother laughed. Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes.

"If Tasuki and I have kids I'll let them know all about their grandparents. I don't know how I'll ever tell you about them, but maybe I'll learn to project inter-dimensional images and pop over in your dreams." She shrugged. "I just wanted to say that I love you and Daddy both, and that I'm sorry I have to go. But I'll always think of you, and if I ever have a daughter, she'll definitely be a social charmer." Swiping at her eyes Lolita mumbled, "Thank you, mom...dad."

And that was the last she saw of her little girl. She hit the replay button, climbed into her daughter's bed, and hugged her daughter's pillow. That video would be watched over and over and over.

~The Epilogue of An Epilogue~

"Lolita-chan, na no da!" Chichiri's cheerful voice rang out. He appeared a moment later, weighed down with books, Ami following closely behind. "Wow, no da. What a mess."

Tasuki's study was indeed a sight to see. A maid mopped up murky water that spilled all over the table while Lolita held a piece of soaked paper by the edges, trying to get it as dry as she could. "Rika-chan had a little accident with her art project," she replied with a shake of the head and a grin. At the sound of her name the little girl on the floor looked up from paging through her mother's old sketchbook.

"Ola, Uncle Chichiri! Ola Auntie Ami!" she cried out. "Mommy said that's Spanish for 'hello'."

"And so it is," Ami replied. "What have you been up to?"

"Paintin' Daddy a portrait. Rika-chan's been studyin' paintin' like Pic-a-sooo," the little redhead replied, bouncing a little. "So what'cha do today, Auntie Ami?"

"Minister Li taught me how to be diplomatic."

"Are you goin' to be the pres'd'nt someday, Auntie Ami?"

Lolita laughed. "There are no presidents in Konan, Baby. Auntie Ami's going to be an ambassador someday, not a president."

Rika stared at her with huge eyes, apparently tried to understand, failed, uttered a small "Oh," and went back to flipping through the sketchbook. As she found the charcoal picture she was looking for, Rika fell silent. She reached out to touch the faces when Lolita caught her chubby hand.

"Whoops! Granpapa and Grandmama's picture is for looking at only."

A frown creased Rika-s forehead. "Demo...Rika-chan can touch Granny an' Grampsy an' even ask for hugs. How's come I can only lookit Granpapa an' Granmama?" she asked in a childish lisp.

"That's because Granny and Grampsy are here. Granpapa and Grandmama are back in mommy's world." Lolita smiled as Rika leaned backwards, arms folded in mimicry of her father's appraising gesture.

"How's come we can't go visit?"

"Because they're too far away."

"Farther'n even your planes an' cars'n hel-cop-ters, mommy?"

"Much, much farther, Sweetie."

Their conversation was interrupted by a knock, followed by Tasuki walking into the room. He raised an amused eyebrow at the mess the maid was still mopping up, and the dripping painting in Lolita's hand, but only went to kiss his wife before plopping down on the floor beside his daughter. Rika at once relocated herself to her father's lap and snuggled deep.

"Daddy, I was wondering about somethin'..."

"What is it?"

"How's come you got to go to mommy's world? Mommy said it's farther than any a' her cars'r planes'r hel-cop-ters can reach. How's come, daddy?"

Tasuki shot Lolita a questioning look over his daughter's pale red head. She nodded at the portrait of her parents on the floor. Oh, that again. "Daddy got there by magic, Rika-chan."

"Can you take Rika-chan next time?"

"I'm afraid I won't be going back."

"Forever?"

"I...I guess."

She child straightened up, pondering for a moment before asking, "Mommy can't ever go back, too?"

"Never."

Her lower lip stuck out in a pout. "But won't Granpapa an' Granmama miss Mommy?"

"We miss each other every day, Honey," Lolita whispered, leaning down to kiss her daughter.

"So how's come they let you go?"

She and Tasuki smiled at each other. Tasuki reached out to brush her cheek and she leaned in to the touch. "They let me go so that Rika-chan will have a Daddy to see every day."

~Finis~

A/N: Whew! It's done! It's done! XD I can't believe it. Thank you, thank you so much to everybody who's read and supported this fic. I don't know how I could have gotten through without all those favourites and alerts and hits and reviews! Especially the reviews. Thank you sooo much. I appreciate each and every one of them.

I think everything's been cleared up already? I hope so. But if anyone's got a question, please don't hesitate to put it in the reviews. Or PM me. Whichever is more convenient. I'll reply as soon as I can. Oh, and if you're sending in a question as not a registered user, please leave me with some way of contacting you.

Thank you from the tippy toppest overflow of my writer's ego. Thank you. I hope "Lessons Only Tasuki Can Teach" has not disappointed. :D