Walking Sadie in the morning sunlight is one of the best feelings in the world. I watch as she sniffs around all the new smells that have come from the night before, her golden coat gleaming, reminding me of long ago when I was almost as carefree as she was. I wished I could be like Sadie, I could run and jump all day and then sit at home curled up by the fire at night and never have to worry about anything. No, that wasn't quite right though, because Sadie did worry. I couldn't say she didn't because I knew she did, she worried about me. I had seen what her worry could do, she tried to follow me into ingo, she became so sick. I shook my head, I hated thinking about that. I never wanted to do that to someone I loved again, not to Sadie, not to mum, not to Connor, not even to Rodger… and especially not to Dave.
Sadie bolted towards me, barking widely, excitedly. I wondered if she sensed my mood and was trying to get me out of it, but obviously I knew she was. I ran my hand along her golden back, pausing to feel the scars on her skin when the gulls had got her so long ago. How could it be that even now ingo had it's reminders around? On the things closest to me as well. I sighed and knelt down to look into Sadie's soft brown eyes that was what I wanted to be reminded of. Earth, warmth, comfort, love. Not ingo, not right now.
I would always love ingo, the whales, the dolphins, but right now…ingo… scared me.
I had only found it again, but I couldn't be in it. I kept fighting to think of air… even though I didn't need to. Before, I could slip into ingo easier, I could think of mum and Sadie… now I couldn't. Maybe I wasn't fully mer and fully earth any more, maybe I was less mer. Connor, he said that it got weaker, mer blood got weaker if you ignore it, and I had been ignoring it for a long time.
My mind was drifting so much that I barely paid attention to where I was walking. Simply following the glimmer of Sadie coat, so when I heard the splash of water ahead I stumbled, thinking at first we had come to the sea, but as I looked up I realise it's not the sea, the sea is close, but it's still distant. I've come here before and the only reason I didn't realise was because the cows weren't there. Last time I came here the cows where in the field, despite it being a cold November night and I thought that was strange. Now, Sadie's running ahead of me, already climbing under the last stile that leads to the Lady stream. I have a sense of deja vu, but I know why, the village above us and the river that runs swiftly through the fields. This was where I first found dad. I'm not repulsed by his memory now, like then, I remember I was scared that night, scared of him. Now I quickly brush a tear away from my eye. I have the vision of him passing through to liminia, but it goes. I won't forget Dad, but I want to remember him alive.
The deep brown pool ahead is just as deep as it was that autumn night, even though it's hotter now and there hasn't been much rain. I don't wonder on that because Sadie's already running up to the edge of the river and is barking at the brown surface. Maybe she's seen a fish underneath, one of the trout's, but suddenly there's a splash of water and I here a yelp. Looking up I see Sadie soaked and running back, pausing just before me to shake her golden coat and shower me with water droplets.
"Urgh, Sadie." I muttered then looked at her, she pressed herself against my legs and I frowned. "What is it girl?" I asked, turning back to the pool.
Swimming to the shore was the easy part; Faro had often come near shore, especially in the last few years. He had always pulled himself up onto the rocks, so he was used to coming into air, it had only ever become easier once he had found out the truth. But, this, this was something he'd never thought he would ever do.
More than that, it was difficult, far more difficult than pushing through into air, or pulling himself up onto a rock. Going down into the deep even, because at least then he'd had Connor and Sapphire there.
He'd waited for high tide at night, knew that she would never answer his call if he asked her to come to the sea. This was the only way he could think of, he hoped it worked, pulling himself up the stream, across the pebbles and stones, ignoring the pain flaring up his tail as they caught sharp rocks where the stream was too shallow to swim through. The earth taste of the streams water was strange in comparison with the sea and the further inland he got the harder it became. The sun rose as he struggle up and it never seemed to occur to him that he might some how be seen, lucky the stream was fairly tucked away, no one usually came by.
He carried on, until the stream came to a steep incline, a small waterfall and a pool. Faro sighed, his tail was cut up and the climb had been tiring enough, he doubted he would be able to get up there even if he hadn't been tired, he curled at the bottom of the pool, light flittered through the water, making strange patterns on the rocky floor. He had to admit it was strangely pretty in the brown earth water. There where different creatures and a different taste but even so he couldn't think of how earth water was any different to sea water. It had the same nutrients, same oxygen giving safety; it could change from being clam to wild at an instance… it just didn't have much salt. …
Faro was pulled out his thoughts, realising that he had been falling asleep; by the sound of … well he didn't know what the sound was. A loud obnoxious rough sound, Similar to a seal somewhat, but defiantly not a seal. Something from the land, but what land creatures- he paused he'd remembered seeing some thoughts of Sapphires, remembering one of them. Of an animal with four legs and a soft gold coat that she loved… what was she called?
Sadie. That was right. A dog.
A flicker of his tail and he moved from the bottom of the pool to peer out the semi-clear water just below the surface. He could see through now to the soft looking face starring down into the water when it suddenly started barking again. This time at him and loudly. Twisting round he moved his tail, pushing down gently to break the water and sending a spray covering the animal that yelp running away.
That was when he heard her. "Urgh…. Sadie." That was Sadie and Sapphire, he had only a faint concept of pets, but he knew that Sadie would go with Sapphire and she had come here. He hadn't even had to call her. "What is it girl?"
He gave a tiny flickering movement of his bruised, cut tail to push his head only just through into the air, it was a lot harder to move into the air here than it was from the sea. Here it was much further away from ingo, but he could just see above the long grass, the rocks around the pool, make out the shimmer of gold coat. And her. She had the long brown hair like he remembered but it was … different, he hadn't been able to tell in the water. It was strange Faro had seen Sapphire on the beach, walking many times, but never on land like she was now. Never in her own element like she was supposed to be. The glint of Ingo was still on her face, but there was something else there too and it wasn't water.
I paused, something, a noise like a pebble breaking the skin of the water came from the pool. Standing up slowly with Sadie still pushing against me I made my way closer. Maybe it was a fish, but something in my stomach, knotting tightly, told me that it wasn't. Maybe because I'd seen dad here, being paranoid, those where explanations for the butterflies in my stomach. As got closer to the pool, it became clear that those weren't the right reasons.
The brown hair floating in the water rose up to reveal a head, then shoulders, a body that I remembered and knew if I could see down I would see the strong sleek grey of a seal tail. Yet, I couldn't unfreeze my muscle, couldn't make my mind believe what my eyes where seeing I must been hallucinating. People hallucinate all the time… but I didn't know what could have caused it. And I had seen this all before.
"Faro… what are you doing here?" I snapped suddenly, he had the same smug grin on his face, but it didn't seem to light up his eyes like it had done before. He took a breath, it seemed rather ragged compared with how I remember, but my memory was faint and it didn't want to come back to me. I tried to look at it more clearly, but it was like when dad first died, no matter how much I tried nothing seemed to be right. I couldn't see more than a blurry resemblance.
"I came for you Sapphire." I frowned, and knelt down next to the pool so I was more level with him. Sadie's warmth was against my back, but soaking my clothing.
"Faro did you even think about how someone might see you?" I muttered, I felt slightly strange myself. Usually when I talked to Faro it was in the sea, far away from my earth world… even the flood in St. Pirans… ingo had been strong around us then. Here, it was still earthy, I had Sadie standing next to me, ingo was weak. I knew I had to be talking at least partly mer thought. It was surreal. More surreal than diving into ingo, because that at least felt natural.
"It is strange isn't it." I blinked, I hadn't thought about Faro reading my mind and automatically I brought a portcullis down when he did.
"You shouldn't do that, and you didn't answer my question." I glanced down to the sea, trying to figure out where the tide was but I knew that it would be low by now. Faro would have no way to get back to the sea. Not for a few hours at least and what if someone came down the path by then?
Faro only shrugged in response, he hardly seemed to care. "Faro do you even know what people might do to you if they find you?" I snapped again, I was only getting more and more annoyed with him as the time went by. I leant back as he moved forward, pushing himself out of the pool more and leaning against the grassy and stony bank of the pool.
"They would put me in some cage and gap at me like humans do with other animals," My mouth opened then snapped shut, he was right, but that didn't mean he had gotten the point.
"Or they'd fish you out and cut you open to see how you tick." I had vivid images of Faro being pined down to a table while scientists cut him open, trying to guess if this entire thing was a trick or not. More than that to shock him enough into understanding how dangerous this was but no fear showed in his eyes. I wondered if Faro was ever scared… I could only think of a few times when he was… with the claw thing going to the meeting the first time, when the tides broke in ingo, in the deep with the kraken, going north. Those times I could understand why he was fearful too; he was still braver than me even then.
Faro just seems to stare up at me though as if he's waiting for something and I remember how I used to be scared that he would think I was weak, too weak to help when the tide knot broke, too weak to help Connor when he couldn't breath. Now, however, I was the one in my element not the other way round.
"Faro you need to go back to the sea, to ingo." I correct myself and when I see his mouth going to move I interrupt him. "Now." it's a command and for once it stops Faro in his tracks. He frowns for a moment.
"You have changed Sapphire." He muttered as he pushes back out into the deeper area of the pool. "I cannot go back until the tide rises." He murmurs after but it's not what I respond to.
"Of course I've changed Faro, what did you expect!" I almost yell but I stop myself, I don't want to cause people to come down. Sadie whimpered and I felt bad for scaring her, but the anger that I'd had in my chest finally wanted to come out. I couldn't leave Faro here and he couldn't leave either, it had no where else to go. "You left Faro, you left and you didn't even come by once, not when I called, not when I went into ingo, not once. Did you think I'd just carry on waiting all this time! I can't wait forever Faro; I moved on, I got a life. I'm happy, I don't need you ruining It." my hands where balled into fists at my sides and I could feel the ball of tears I was holding back at the back of my throat. Faro eyes seemed different though from before.
I sighed, my shoulders slumping. "You disappeared, faro. You promised me you'd never disappear." My anger seemed to have completely drained from me, I felt tired. Exhausted. I wanted to go back to warmth and my familiar, safe, little cottage, with mum and Rodger and curl under my blanket and never get back up again. I heard Sadie whimper again and felt her push her head onto my lap. I stroked it absent mindedly for a while. Silence passed between us, I didn't count how long, it was only when his movement caused a splash of water that I look up again. Faro had moved back across the water, frowning.
"I'm sorry, Sapphire." His voice was quiet, still husky from being in air I guessed. "I never meant to… I didn't think…"
"No, you didn't faro, do you ever?" I muttered. "You seem to just go and do things without thinking about anyone else, about any consequences."
His face changed for an instant. "and if I never did that then I would never have found you, would you have preferred that Sapphire. You're mer as well, would you have me let you just ignored that. Would you do everything differently?"
I glared, I loved ingo everything about it… yet.
"If it meant I never had to meet you, then yes, faro. I'd much rather never found out about ingo, much rather you never came." I stood up and looked back towards the sea again, I could tell the tide was starting to rise, I'm sure faro could too. I didn't realise that so much time had past, but I guess it was like ingo, time changes. I kept my mind closed all the time; I didn't want to see into his or him into mine. "Now leave Faro."
a/n ::: poll is still open, reviews get cookies (constructive critics gets two!) flamers can have some water. also, I need a beta… as someone mentioned last time. Which I do take into account, however, I don't really have much time to look for one… I will try if I get no response. At the moment I'm just doing a good couple of proof reads before they go up. But there still may be errors.
((also, for anyone who ask 'how does faro even know how to get into the lady stream?' because I actually thought about that, but I couldn't see how I could answer that in the story without going off track, here is my educated answer. The mer, have a linked memory, remember, faro shows sapphire things that happened years and year before he was born at one time in... the first book maybe.... So he probably knows like her, the mer version of the zenor mermaid, and so I figured he realised how to do it via that. There, an educated answer!))