Chapter Four

I stagger backwards in surprise as the man looks back at me calmly, as if he didn't just kiss me out of nowhere. My mind reels and a heap of emotions flood through my head - anger, bewilderment, and bits of affection – as I gape back at the white robed figure before me. Did this man just say he loved me? Impossible. Maybe it's a lie? Maybe I heard wrong. Maybe my mind is making up things.
I shake my head and the man walks towards me and clutches my hand, his grip tight but also gentle. It feels so right but I can't help but think that maybe this is all a little trick. Maybe his plan is to sweep me off my feet one day and leave me alone the next. I can't help but consider that it might happen. The negative ends of my past relationships are always going to be there to leave sparks of doubt.
Finally I manage to get words out of my mouth, fuelled by the need to know that this isn't just another man filled with lies.
"First you almost kill me!"
The man opens his mouth to speak but I cut him off quickly.
"Then you suddenly decide that you love me and randomly kiss me? What's wrong with you? I don't know your name, I've only seen you once before, and you decide one of the first things you're going to do when you first see me is give me a kiss? Can't you see I've been heartbroken enough already? Can't you see that I've had enough to do with love? Can't you see that nobody would love me anyway?"
Without meaning to, tears start to roll down my cheeks. I shake his hand off from mine but my actions leave me feeling melancholic and lonely. The truth is, I do feel something for this strange man. From the moment that I saw him I fell in love. But if it means going through the pain I've had to go through many times in the past, I'd be more than glad to lock those feelings away. Ever since my last failed relationship I've decided to give up. And this time it might not just be emotional pain. Physical too, maybe. I recall the sharp blade that I'd seen earlier flick out from behind his wrist and feel more hopeless than ever. One part of me wants him. One part is scared of heartbreak and is just looking out for my safety. Suddenly I realise, for the first time since cutting myself off from relationships, that I don't know which part to go with; my head or my heart? On other occasions it was an easy choice – walk away and go with my head. But this man, he's so different to the others, in many ways that I still can't understand. I sit down on the floor with the wall of a building against my back as tears streak down from my eyes and my mind tries to reason with my instincts. I remember back to my thoughts after I met him for the first time. Maybe he is 'the one'.
"Please take a chance on me."
I don't look up but I know that the man is beside me again.
"I will never hurt you. That is a promise. My duty is not to harm innocent people like you, especially not one I fell in love with the moment I saw them."
Surprised at his sincere words, I look up. He loved me at first sight too? I watch as he gives me a sad smile and carries on.
"I don't know whether you love me back. But if you do, just say the words. And if you don't I'll leave you alone. It's as simple as that. Sure I'll get hurt, but that's what happens when you try. How will I ever know without trying?"
I hastily wipe the tears from my eyes. What am I doing just sitting here crying in front of a man that loves me? That is willing to get hurt just to make me happy? He's right. I have to try. The emotions I feel are so strong, much stronger than anything I have felt before. I can't lock them away. I know that much, at least. Suddenly I don't care about whether I get hurt. It doesn't matter anymore. Because it feels so right.
"Take a leap of faith? For me?" The man stretches out his hand towards me.
I take it gratefully and he pulls me to my feet.
"Altaïr."
I glance back at the man and tilt my head questioningly to the side.
"Pardon?"
He smiles back at me and my heart soars slightly in the confines of my chest.
"My name is Altaïr."
I grin back at the hooded figure.
"Oh right. Altaïr."