Finally I was able to finish this story, so here's it with an ending a little more happy. I really liked how it came out so I hope you like it too. Anyway any comment or criticism will be appreciated.
Also I owe a huge (Really huge) thanks, to Nebula2 for the beta.
I don't owe Criminal Minds or any of his characters.
OoOoO
Title: Finding a Way.
"The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." - Morrie Schwartz.
True to his word Dave had been to Aaron's side all the time, much to Aaron's discomfort, but he couldn't really say nor do anything about it because the whole team was doing the same. Well, not exactly the same but close enough.
It was a bit of a challenge, being around Jack. Not because Dave hated be near children, but because he really had no experience doing so. He was hardly close to his family, so the experience with nieces and nephews was minimal and in work he would rather leave Prentiss or JJ handle things when it came to children.
Jack Hotchner was from head to toe Aaron's son and not only was it the physical resemblance, Jack was respectful and a bit too quiet for his age, just like his father. He wasn't the image of a perfect kid, who never did anything wrong, but he was a good kid.
His relationship with Aaron was... okay. Their working relationship was practically intact; the personal, on the other hand was just okay. Since that night Aaron hadn't brought up the topic of their relationship, not even once and as much as Dave didn't like it, he was doing the same.
That was partly why Aaron's call on Friday night surprised him, but no more than what the younger agent told him did.
/***/
"Hey, I'm not interrupting you, am I?" Aaron said, sounding nervous.
Dave immediately straight up in his chair, frowning.
"No, no. You're not. What's going on?"
The line was silent for a moment and then.
"Well, Jack wanted me to..." Aaron sighed, "He wanted me to ask you if you would like to go to the zoo with us tomorrow."
Dave remained silent, totally shocked by the invitation to say anything for a moment.
Predictably, Aaron took it in a negative way and Dave was brought out of his thoughts when Aaron began to speak again.
"You don't have to come if you don't want to. I'll tell Jack you had other things to do, I'm sure that he'll understand-"
Dave cut him out. "I'll come."
"He- What?" Aaron said, caught totally off guard.
Dave smiled softly at that. "I said I'll come."
"Are you sure? I mean, you don't have to feel like you have to come."
"You know it's me you're talking to, right?" Dave began amused. "You know I never do anything I don't want to, so don't worry. You said tomorrow, right?"
"Uh, yeah. Is 8:30 okay with you?"
"Sounds good to me. So, I'll see you tomorrow."
"Yeah, good night."
"Night."
/***/
Still feeling a bit uncertain and confused about the whole thing, Dave arrived to Aaron's apartment at 8:25.
After receiving an excited welcome from Jack, and a small smile from Aaron, they got going.
It wasn't long before they arrived to the zoo. It was pretty crowded, with excited children all over the place and parents trying to keep in step with them. It was a bit of an experience to Dave.
Jack guided them over the zoo; taking them both by the hand and told them excitedly everything he knew about each animal. What they ate, their living environment, all courtesy of Uncle Spencer and all the books he had given to Jack.
Dave was having a good time, but still couldn't stop thinking why Jack had wanted Dave to come with him and his father. For while he had been just fine around Jack and even now, he knew he was not a favorite of Jack among the team; Penelope and Emily were his favorites along with JJ and Henry, so why he didn't want any of them come in his place?
He got the opportunity to find it out when Aaron went to the bathroom leaving him and Jack sitting alone on a bench nearby.
"Are you having fun?" Dave asked Jack after some time.
Jack nodded, his legs swinging back and forth.
"Yeah, me too." Dave nodded in response. He didn't want Jack to think he was angry with him for asking him to come.
Dave looked in the direction of the bathroom to make sure Aaron wasn't coming back yet.
"Why did you ask your father to ask me if I wanted to come with the two of you?" And then feeling the need to elaborate. "I thought you'd rather come with JJ and Henry."
Jack shrugged, "'cause Daddy smiles more when you're with us."
And that answer, as simple as it was, left Dave feeling a lump in his throat.
Out of the corner of his eye he saw Jack looking up at him, so he had to force a smile on his face once again reminded that this was Aaron Hotchner's son.
Stupidly, he had been waiting for a kid-like response. One I don't know or a just because, but not this. Not something so deep and innocent.
His reflection was cut off when he saw Aaron walking towards them. He tried to act as if nothing had happened, trying to put the thought in the back of his mind. Of course it don't work, Aaron knew him better than anyone and immediately felt something was wrong.
The younger agent looked from Jack to him, frowning.
"Everything okay?"
Dave shrugged careless. "Everything is fine. Jack said earlier he wanted to see the monkeys, why don't we go see them now?"
Aaron looked at Dave, tilting his head slightly to the right. Obviously he knew something was going on and was trying to decide whether he should push or just let it go.
Finally he decided to let it go.
"All right."
The walk through the zoo lasted a couple of more hours. Eventually they ate something and bought some gifts for the team and Jessica at Jack's request.
On the way back, Jack fell asleep deeply after all the excitement of the day and he and Aaron kept a light conversation.
Once they arrived at Aaron's apartment, Aaron went to put Jack in bed, leaving Dave in the living room.
It didn't take more than 10 minutes for Aaron to come back.
"He didn't even shift a bit when I put him on the bed," Aaron commented from where he was, standing in the hallway looking at Dave.
Dave shrugged. "I'm not surprised. He spent all day running from place to place, he must be pretty worn out."
"Yeah," Aaron walked into the living room, stopping next to the sofa where Dave was sitting. "Want something to drink?"
"Whatever you're having."
Aaron had to smile at that. If it were just him, he would have some tea or just some water but he knew Dave didn't really like them, so he chose whiskey instead.
He returned with two glasses and handed one to Dave before sitting next to him. Aaron looked at Dave as he took a sip of his drink, while he rested his own glass on his knee.
"Thanks for coming today. I know you don't like being around children and... I really appreciate it."
Dave shook his head. "You don't have to thank me. I said I would be there when you needed me, besides I like Jack, he's a good kid."
Aaron dropped his gaze, absently running his fingers over the lip of his glass before looking at Dave again.
"I... I think I owe you an apology, for what happened the other night." He said ashamed.
"It's okay, you don't owe me anything," Dave started only to be cut off by Aaron.
"No, no. I do. The way I reactd was wrong and besides that I threw you out." Aaron said rubbing the back of his neck.
Dave tilted his head, thinking about it for a moment before give a tiny nod.
"Okay, I give you that. Your reaction was not the best, but I shouldn't have pushed you about that so soon. After everything that happened I should have waited until you were on your feet again, wait until you and Jack were settled down. I know that now. "
"That's not really true, you did give me time, like you had done before when I was having trouble with something, it's just that this was not like other times, this was a lot more than other times." Aaron shrugged.
"I still think I owe you an apology too, for the things I said."
"Everything you said was true." Aaron replied, shrugging.
"I know, but I still think I have to apologize." Dave answer, a smirk on his lips.
Aaron didn't say anything so Dave spoke instead.
"So we both screwed up."
The corner of Aaron's lip curled up slightly.
"Pretty much,"
Dave smiled at Aaron before raising the glass to his lips, looking as the younger agent did the same out of the corner of his eye.
"So, where are we now?"
"Truthfully?"
Dave gave a short nod.
Aaron took a deep breath. "I don't know. I don't know what to tell you, things are not okay yet. Everything I said that night was an excuse, but it was also true, Jack still wakes up sometimes in the middle of the night crying and calling for her. Just last month, when I was about to leave for work he began crying and begging me not to go away, and I can only hug him and tell him I had to go to catch the bad guys."
Dave looked at him for a while, before deciding that the crappy parent's talk would have to wait, because right now the important thing was talk about them, about their relationship.
"What about you?"
"You have to know I still feel the same way about you, but I... I still feel guilty about what happened, I'll probably always be, but right now, the simple thought of being with someone or rebuild my life feels wrong." Aaron replied, not looking at Dave's eyes.
After some hesitation, Dave reached down putting his hand over Aaron's and waited to see the reaction of younger agent before curling his fingers around Aaron's.
"You know, what I told you that night is also true. I'm not expecting things to be back as they were before, much less that you and Jack are going to act as if nothing happened, because it did. I'm just asking you to give me a chance to show you that I care and want to be here for you and Jack."
Aaron looked down at their joined hands and back to Dave's face.
"I... I know that Dave, but I can't make any promises. Things aren't okay, and I don't know if they will ever be. I don't know if I will ever be okay."
Dave squeezed Aaron's hand, encouraged by the fact he wasn't pulling away.
"I'm not asking you to, hell I don't want to. What I want is for us to be together. I love you and you love me, I don't see why we can't be together. I'm just asking you for a chance to show you we can make this work."
Aaron didn't say anything for a long time; he just looked at Dave, all the emotions he was feeling written over his face.
"Okay," he whispered, looking at Dave straight in the eyes. "Okay."
Completely prepared to be rejected, it took Dave a moment to get what Aaron mean by that, but once he did a small smile formed on his lips.
"Good." Dave said, leaning forward to kiss Aaron.
The kiss was soft, almost hesitat after so long, and still Aaron's lips feel and taste just like Dave remembered. Dave lifted a hand, brushing Aaron's cheek and moving slowly toward the back of Aaron's neck to deepen the kiss.
They pulled apart after a moment, both slightly breathless; Dave rested his forehead against Aaron's.
"I missed this." Dave whispered.
Aaron chuckled softly. "I missed you too."
"Eventually you will come to understand that love heals everything, and love is all there is." - Gary Zukav.
OoOoO
A/N:Thanks to all who read it. I hope you all have enjoyed, and as always feedback appreciated. Thank you.
Also, I guess we are all concerned by the lack of Thomas Gibson's contract for next season, so please, if you haven't come sign the petition, do it, the link is here: http:/ /www. petitiononline. com/ SaveTG /petition. html (Just remove the spaces.)