Authors' Note: Please note that the title of the story has changed, but it is still the same story! Thanks :).

Chapter Two

As Alice and I left the doctors office we were both dead quiet. My head was still spinning with all the questions needing answers and Alice seemed to be in her own little world. I was jealous of her in so many ways. She had her whole life ahead of her: prom, college, a career. Anything she wanted she could have all because she knew how to keep her legs closed. She wasn't going to have to worry about what everyone else thought of her when her stomach grew. She didn't have to worry about her parents kicking her out once they knew. She didn't have to loose the love of her life because she made the wrong choice one night. Lucky Alice.

"Are you hungry?" Alice asked.

"No, I'm OK."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"You know you really should eat," she persisted.

"Geez, I'm not hungry, Why are you so concerned about it!"

"Because you're pregnant and pregnant people are supposed to eat a lot," she said as if it was common knowledge.

"What are you talking about?"

"Your pregnant and there so many things you should be doing."

"Like what?"

"You should be taking prenatal vitamins every day and you should be eating healthy. You should
be looking into parenting classes you could take to get you ready."

I sat there stunned. Alice had really looked into all of this while I hadn't even thought further than keeping it or not. Granted, it was a huge choice.

"Believe it or not, I care about you Bella and that baby inside of you is apart of you. So I care about it, too. Yeah, I'm going to bug you about eating, sleeping and even how much weight you gain. You're not in this alone," she said with a smile.

"I always knew you were a good friend, Alice, but I never knew you were this good."

"Hey, I'm not the only one. If it wasn't for you, Jasper and me probably still wouldn't be together."

"Almost didn't at first get involved with it."

"Why?"

"I don't know. You're just amazing; and I love my brother, but he can be a player."

"Yeah, I know, but if he tries any of that crap, I'll play his ass into nonexistence."

"And I'd help ya," I laughed.

"No, you can't. I'll have to have someone to bail me out. I refuse to wear that horrible neon orange."

I laughed at Alice's horrified look at the thought of wearing an orange prison jumpsuit.

"Wait. Why are we at Walgreen's?" I asked as she pulled into a parking space.

"Well, you need to get on prenatal vitamins as soon as possible and I'm sure they sell them here."

"How do you know this?"

"What? it's Walgreen's; they sell everything from Bibles to condoms."

"No, I meant about the prenatal vitamins."

"Well I mean, I'm not an expert, but when you told me you were pregnant I did a little Internet searching."

"Wow! I haven't even done that." Alice had thought about this more than I had it seemed.

"It's OK, Bella, you have a lot on you. I bet you have already picked a few names out."

"No, no names yet."

"Don't worry a lot of people wait till they know what it is before they even think of names. So what is it that you want? Boy or girl?"

"I hadn't really thought about that either."

Do you think you can deliver naturally or will you need a C-section?"

"A C what?" I said.

"You know, a C-section. It's where they cut you open to take the baby out, if you can't push it out yourself. Wow Bella, you're really white all of a sudden!"

"Cut?" I asked, feeling the blood drain from my face.

"Well yeah. How else would they get it out if you won't push."

"I don't know. I haven't really thought about that either."

"Geez Bella, what have you thought about?"

If she wanted me to be honest, the only thing on my mind lately was Edward. Judging by Alice's face, she knew where my train of thought had landed.

"Please tell me you aren't think about Edward and that damn kiss."

"I can't help it, Alice."

"Yes, you can. You have bigger things to think about than some guy that you have no right even being with."

"I have every right to be with him. I love him and I shouldn't have to be explaining my feelings to you."

"Look, I don't like either Jake or Edward. You need to figure it all out now. You are stressed and I'm sure the baby can feel that. You might love Edward, Bella, but that's not his baby growing in you right now."

I couldn't believe she had gone there. It had been a no touch zone with us since I first told her I might be pregnant.

"You know what Alice? If I could change that I would."

"But you can't and I just think you need to realize that and grow-up a little. Stop thinking about yourself for a little while and think about what's best for that baby."

"The baby that I'm not even sure I want?"

"Want it or not, you have it."

I glared at the dashboard not saying a word.

"Look, I don't want to fight with you," Alice said after taking a few deep breaths.

"A little late for that don't you think."

"It just feels like I'm being more of the grown up in this and I'm not even the one that's going to be the mom."

"Don't you think I know that Alice. I'm going to be a mom. My life is over."

"Stop it. Just stop it!" she barked at me. "You life isn't over; it's just changing. Stop throwing yourself little pity parties and take this time to get your self together, before you bring a baby into it."

She opened the door and slammed it as she started towards the store. I sat in the passenger seat with my arms crossed until she got back carrying a paper bag. We didn't talk anymore until we got to my house. She didn't shut the car off, but handed me the paper bag.

"Please take them," she said not looking at me.

"Fine." I got out and didn't look back when I heard the tires of her car pull on to the road.
I walked through the house straight to my room, fuming over how Alice had made me feel so ill informed. I went to my laptop and started to type in different things about childbirth. I ended up watching a video of someone giving birth and almost threw up. How was I suppose to survive that? I started to panic and tried to calm myself before I passed out. I mean a lot of people did this and most didn't die. There was those rare chances that someone did, but that was usually due to some other complication. I was healthy as I had ever been.

I turned the computer off and rested my head on the desk. I wasn't ready for all of this. I didn't even know if I'd be doing it all alone. I kind of assumed that Jake would stay with me and help me with the baby, but what if he didn't?

I shut my eyes trying to push those thoughts away. I let my mind drift to Edward as it did most of the time. I let the 'what ifs' start. Like what if Edward knew how I felt. What if I could be with him. What if I had Edward's baby instead of Jacob's.

When I opened my eyes again I was at school waiting in the parking lot. I wasn't sure what I was waiting for, but as soon as I saw the sleek sliver Volvo I felt peace.

"Hey gorgeous." Edward said with a wink as he got out of his car and walked towards me.

"Hey you! Look, I was thinking about skipping. Want to come?" I asked leaning into him a little.

"What and miss all of the higher learning?" he said sarcastically.

"Fine, if you don't want to come." I teased.

"Your car or mine?"

"Yours."

We drove a secluded area back in the woods, where I did little to convince him to sleep with me. It was magical and when he dropped me back at home I couldn't believe what had happened. My plan had actually worked and now I could say the baby was Edward's and no would know.

I woke up with a start and had to keep reminding myself that I hadn't actually deceived Edward like I had in the dream. But no matter how much I tried to get it out of my head I still felt horrible for even doing it in my dreams.

I had to tell Edward how I felt about him, but I knew I'd never be able to get the words out of my mouth. I had always been a great writer, so I decided to hide behind a piece of paper instead of confronting him. I pulled out a plain sheet and a pen, ready to pour my heart out onto it.
My mind was filled with too many thoughts to just focus on one. I looked at the paper in front of me, imagining it with words, sentences, paragraphs of my thoughts, my opinions, my hope and dreams. Yet, I still sat in front of a pristine, untarnished white sheet of paper, while all my feelings were tearing me from the inside out.

I wasn't scheming like I was in my dream, but I knew I that I could get Edward to be with me like he had in my dream. Then and there, I swore to myself that I would stay away from Edward for his own good. Hopefully. It would be easier done than said because just the thought tore at my heart.