Disclaimer: as if any of you need reminding.

Chapter 17

Why?

I woke up to darkness, and I tried to figure out where I was. I could hear a couple of voices murmuring in the background, but couldn't make out words. Why was everything black?

Oh, that's right. I got shot.

Once again, I was stuck wondering whether or not I was dead. But, if I were dead, I wouldn't be able to hear anything, right? Well, no-one really knows what happens when you die.

I squeezed my eyelids together. Nope, pretty sure I was still alive. It's true that I know nothing about being dead, but I'm pretty sure that death doesn't come with a horrid throbbing in your side.

I recognised the voices. Peeta… and Haymitch. Well, it's nice to know my former mentor still cares enough about me to visit me in my sick bed. I opened my eyes, and waited for them to come into focus. Sure enough, there they were; standing in the doorway, seemingly arguing about something. Finally, their words broke through my lethargic state.

"…don't you realize what it would do to her? She needs rest!" I wondered what Peeta meant; what did they want me to do?

"Yeah, she does. But she might as well do something useful while she's at it! The doctor said she should be waking up soon, so why don't you go sit next to her and hold her hand?"

"Haymitch… I don't think this is a good idea."

"You know she wants nothing more than to make him better. This is probably the only way to do it. She'll want to help."

"I guess. I'll ask her." Peeta had a determined look on his face. Haymitch sighed.

"Great. Now go to her, I think she's awake."

Peeta's head spun around to look at me, lying in my bed, watching the two of them with my eyes wide open. About three seconds later, he was at my side, holding my hand.

"How are you feeling?"

"Honestly? Awful." I replied, grimacing. "What did they have to do to me?"

"Well, not too much considering. You have Cinna to thank for that," he said, grinning. "The bullet never reached your skin. But it left one hell of a bruise."

"You're telling me," I said, lifting the covers to see bandages wrapped around my torso. "How are you?"

"Fine, I didn't get hurt at all."

"That's not what I meant."

Peeta's face softened, then he groaned and lay his head on the bed.

"That bad, huh?"

"You have no idea," He whispered, "What it was like for me. To have you in my arms, dying…" I reached out and stroked the back of his head, loving the feeling of his soft hair running through my fingers.

"I think I do," I said, shuddering. "Remember in the Quell, after you ran into the force field? I thought you were dead. I just couldn't…" I shook myself, remembering that I was supposed to be comforting Peeta. "But don't worry. I'm going to be fine now." Peeta nodded, looking up from the bed. I took my hand away from his hair and out it on his cheek. "I won't leave you."

Peeta hummed, closing his eyes, and held my hand to his face. We sat in silence for a little while before I mentioned what had been on my mind since Haymitch had left the room.

"What were you talking about earlier?"

"Hmm?"

"With Haymitch. You said you would ask me something." Peeta sighed and opened his eyes, dropping my hand, but keeping it entwined in his.

"Are you sure? I want you to, and I know that you'll want to, it's just, you were shot only two days ago and-"

"Wait, two days?" I nodded and was a bout to reply, but I held my hand up to silence him. "Never mind, it's not important. But what do you mean?"

"The doctors want you to go and talk to Gale."

I froze. From what I wasn't sure. Happiness? Excitement? Anger? I wanted to see him; he was my best friend.

Yes, that's right.

Was.

I don't know where my best friend is now. He seems to have disappeared. But if there is any chance of him still being in there, deep down, then I was going to find him.

"When?"

"As soon as you feel well enough."

"I'm well enough." I tried to hop out of the bed, but Peeta held me down.

"No, not yet. The doctors have to see you awake first, and then you can go. And you have to be careful; your side is still really sore."

I sighed, and lay back down, still unsure about seeing Gale. I mean, last time I saw him, he tried to kill Peeta! I know that wasn't Gale acting, but that doesn't really matter at the moment. Trying to kill Peeta is an act I cannot forgive.

I shook my head. Did I just think that? Yes, I know that I could never forgive a person that consciously tried to murder Peeta, but Gale didn't know what he was doing. He'd been Hijacked! I thought back to just after I had been shot, trying to remember what Peeta had said. I gazed into his eyes, and the memory hit me.

"Katniss, stay with me! I love you too much to lose you! Don't you dare die on me, Katniss! Stay with me!"

Replaying it in my head, I could remember how those words had made me feel. How every little thing Peeta did made me feel. He affected me more than anybody else in the world did. For example, if Finnick or Haymitch smiled at me, I'd think nothing of it. But when Peeta smiled at me, I would think about it for ages, trying to figure out what it meant. Why? Did I love Peeta Mellark?

That question seemed to be repeated quite often in my head. I had always known what I had wanted when I was little; I'd grow up, support my family, work in the mines and hunt, with Gale at my side. I would never marry. I would never fall in love. Because I could never have children. I couldn't afford to create a new life, only for it to get sent to the Hunger Games and die. After my first Games, that resolve only strengthened; everyone knew that the children of Victors were targeted, and Snow hated me in particular; I knew any child of mine would not live to see their thirteenth birthday.

But then the Capitol had forced Peeta and I together. They were going to force us to get married and have children, and most certainly send them to the Games to get massacred. But now, we were in District Thirteen, away from the Capitol. If we win this war, there will be no more Games. I won't have to worry.

I shook my head. There may be no more Games, but I had had the idea of no marriage and no children ingrained in my brain since I first learned to think. It wasn't going to disappear that easily.

But… I still feel something for Peeta. How? It makes no sense! And this entire thing would be so much easier if I could just forget about my feelings for him and move on to more important things, like the war, and Gale. But I can't… and the odd thing is I don't think I want to.

I remember when I was younger, and my mother was mumbling about how hard it was to watch her children in the reaping, wondering if we would be picked, praying that we wouldn't. I remember asking her why she married father in the first place when she knew that she would have to wait and wish during the reaping. She looked at me so intently I grew nervous. I didn't know what the expression on her face was; but now I am certain it was sadness. She told me something that day, something I thought I had forgotten.

"Katniss, there are many things in this world that we will never understand. There's death, for one. But that is not all. We will never understand the most powerful force on the earth: do you know what that is, Katniss? Love. We will never understand it, but we can feel it, and it makes us stronger. There are some people in this world that are immune to love, people that only care about money and power. They will never be as strong as those of us that have the ability to love. There are many types of love; love for a child, your parents, or your friends. Then, there is love for another person… your special person. You can't chose who you fall in love with; it just happens. And when you fall in love, there is not much that you can do other than let it catch you up and guide you on your journey. I fell in love with your father, and I let that love guide me. I tried to fight it at first, for a couple of different reasons. First, my father didn't want me seeing a boy from the Seam. Then there is the point you made Katniss; I didn't think I could bear going through the reaping, watching your father's reapings were awful; what would it be like if it were my own child? But you can't fight love, and it took me away anyway. It's not a bad thing; I know when I say it like that it makes it seem like it was against my will. But it wasn't. Love was the best thing that ever happened to me. Not once to I regret loving your father."

I think it was the longest and wisest speech I have ever heard my mother give. Of course I didn't understand it back then. Hell, I don't think I understood it a week ago. But now, I think I might.

I can't fight my feelings; even if I do, they'll surface anyway. I might as well give into them.

Problem is I'm not sure if I can.

I shook my head, thinking back. I thought about all the times, recently, that Peeta had held me in his arms, and how safe I'd felt. I'd known for a while that I could not live without him. Maybe this'll be easier than I thought. I'd just do what my mother told me all those years ago, and see where my feelings took me.

So, was it love? I'm not sure; but I know it's something. I had felt so sure about it before, but I guess, as I have never been in love before, I don't know what it is like. Maybe it will turn into love.

Did I say maybe? I think, no, I know, that if I follow my mothers advice, it will turn into love… If I'm not already there.

~~0~~

The doctor came to see me about half an hour after I woke up; apparently, they had much more pressing cases than me; I wasn't on my deathbed. They gave me the okay, and I left the room with Peeta. I almost sprinted to Gales room, and dashed through the door, but stopped when I realized Peeta wasn't following me.

"Peeta?"

"I can't go in there. I'll ruin whatever progress they've made."

"You don't have to actually go and see him; just stand on the other side of the glass. He won't be able to see you, and he won't be able to hurt you, I just…" I trailed off, not wanting to admit how much I needed him. But Peeta just shook his head.

"I can't, Katniss. I can't risk that he'll hear me or something. Anyway, I have to go talk to Finnick and Annie."

"Peeta…" I whispered, moving closer to him. He sighed, and put his hands on my shoulders.

"You'll be fine, Katniss. You go talk to Gale; he needs you now. I'll go and talk to Annie, and then I'll be back and waiting outside this door before you know it, okay?" I nodded, beaten, and he smiled. "You'll be fine," he whispered. Then, he leaned in and lightly pressed his lips against mine. Before I could react, he pulled away and pushed me towards the door. "Now go," he said softly. I locked eyes with him as I went into the room, and didn't look away until the door had closed between us.

"Katniss?"

I spun around to see who had spoken, and I saw her. I gasped.

"Johanna?" I felt elated, then guilty. The way Finnick and Haymitch had told it, Johanna had saved my life in the Quell by leading Enobaria away, and I hadn't been to see her since she got rescued. I had been so worried about Gale, then Peeta, then myself, and then Gale again, that I had forgotten all about her. "Are… Are… How have you been?"

"How have I been?" Snorted Johanna. "I've been locked up in a cell in the Capitol, tortured everyday, watching people go out and them come back in speaking gibberish… waiting, just waiting for the day I would crack. Wondering when, if ever, they were going to kill me. Wanting to die, but still scared that my life was over! How do you think I've been?"

I didn't say anything. What could I say?

"But I'm not why we're here right now," she continued. "I'm fine now."

"Why are you here?"

"Gale," she said simply.

"But… you don't even know him!" I said. "How could you help?"

"You're forgetting that Gale and I were stuck in high security cells right next to each other for the past… I don't even know how long it's been! Months? Weeks? The people here haven't seen fit to tell me!"

"Over a month," I said quickly, thinking back. "I'm not too sure, either. At least two months. But you and Gale were together in the Capitol?"

"I just said that, didn't I?"

"So you know him. But, why are you here? And why do they want me here? How can we help?"

"Well, you know how the hijacking works, right?"

"They show him filming of the past while injecting him with tracker jacker venom."

"Right. So, all of his memories have been altered so that he wants to kill Peeta." I flinched, but Johanna didn't notice. "So, the doctors think that seeing people he is familiar with might help him."

"But, won't you being there just remind him of the torture?"

"Not really. You see, we were right next to each other for a long time. But in the last… I don't know, week or so, when they were hijacking him, he was moved to the hospital. He only came back rarely, and usually while I was in my own torture session, so we didn't see much of each other during that. The doctors are hoping me being with him will help him remember the time immediately before the hijacking. You and his family will help him remember the times before he was captured."

"So, is that what I have to do today?"

"No. Today is just a trial. As you say, my presence might make him remember his torture. And you being there might make him think of Peeta."

I froze. I hadn't thought of that.

"So today is just to see how they think it will work," finished Johanna.

"But I can still talk to him, right?"

"Of course." This time, it wasn't Johanna who answered, but a doctor coming out of Gale's room. He nodded at Johanna. "You can go in now."

"Thanks." She entered the room.

"What about me?" I asked.

"You can go in after Johanna. We think you'll be more likely to have an effect on him, so we want her to go first."

"So that she can see him before me, in case what ever I do makes him incapable of talking to anyone else. That makes sense." I felt my stomach fall through my feet. Was he really so bad that just seeing me could do that to him? I knew of course, ever since attacked Peeta, that he was in a terrible condition. Really terrible. This clinched it.

"Right. Johanna shouldn't be long, for as I'm sure she explained to you, this is just a test run. You can watch if you want." He nodded behind me, and I turned to see the glass window. This time, it was uncovered, and I could see Johanna, standing a little way away from Gale.

Gale was sitting on his bed, looking at Johanna with a blank expression on his face. He looked a little healthier than last time; his bruises were starting to fade, and he looked like he had gained a little weight. His eyes were still the same though. Blank, dull, and cold.

Johanna seemed to be doing most of the talking. Gale would respond every now and then with what seemed like an odd word or too. I couldn't hear anything, but there was a speaker above the window; I figured they could turn the audio on and off.

After a little while, Johanna came back in, looking a little stressed. The doctor asked her a couple of questions, then nodded, and she turned to leave. Just before she did, though, she looked at me.

"Brace yourself," she muttered. "It'll be hard. Good luck." Then she walked out the door.

I stared at Gale, who was looking at the ceiling, through the glass. No matter how changed he was, that was still Gale. He was in there somewhere.

I took a deep breath, and, with the doctor's approval, went through the door.

When the door opened, Gale glanced up. His gray eyes bored into me, and I felt my confidence disappear. He wasn't lurching forward to try and kill me, but he wasn't smiling either. There wasn't ay of that old warmth in his features. They were all hard and cold. I stayed rooted to the spot, unable to move. I had a feeling he wasn't going to hurt me, but I didn't feel like I was safe. This person was a product of the Capitol. President Snow modelled them. And anything created by Snow was created to be my enemy.

"You can come closer you know." I jumped. Gale's voice was nothing like it was before. It was like a knife, cutting through not only the silence, but also my heart. "I won't hurt you. You're not like that monster."

"Monster?" I whispered, taking a step forward. "Do you mean Snow?"

"No. Peeta Mellark. He'll hurt you Katniss, I recommend you stay away from him." He didn't sound concerned, but angry. It was almost like he was ridiculing me.

"He's not a monster. Peeta is trying his best to help end this war, to stop the Capitol from doing harm!" I managed to sound confident somehow, but It was far from what I felt.

"The Capitol did nothing wrong," he spat. I froze. What did he just say? "They didn't start this war, Katniss. You're the reason all these people have died."

"What? How can you say that?" My voice was shaking now; he had voiced what I had been worried about for months. What if he was right? What if all of this was my fault? No, said a voice inside my head. This war was waiting to happen. And it's the right thing to do. Loads of people, innocent children, die every year because of the Capitol. It must be stopped. "What of the Hunger Games?" I asked, feeling a little stronger. "Are they right?"

"No."

"Then how can you say the Capitol did nothing wrong?"

"The Hunger Games may not have been right, but they kept the people in line. If it weren't for the Hunger Games this would have happened a lot sooner! Even more people would have died."

"Where are you?" I whispered. "Gale, where are you? This isn't you!"

"I'm right here. Have you gone blind in the last few weeks? Oh, how tragic! Katniss Everdeen is blind! How will we live! Of course, no-one cares about the people getting tortured!"

"I care! Gale, the whole time you've been locked up in that place I've been worried! Why do think I'm here now? To yell at you?"

"Well, it seems like it." He seemed a little calmer, even if he was still glaring at me. I chose to ignore his last comment.

"Do you know how many people have been a wreck? Not just me, but your mother, Rory, Vick and Posy! My mother, as well. Most of the other refugees from Twelve that you saved. You saved them, Gale! Do you even remember that?" He seemed about to respond, but I didn't let him. "Even Prim-" I stopped. It was too hard to talk about Prim, especially now.

"I've already seen my family," sneered Gale. "And they were a whole lot kinder to me than you're being."

"Well, I'm sure you didn't yell at them! What has the Capitol done to you that makes you forget the five years we spent together? Five years, Gale! And what, does that just not matter?"

For once, Gale looked like he had nothing to say. I took that as a que to continue.

"Gale, we've been through so much together. Please, just try to remember!" I said softly, yet urgently. I looked away from him and down at the floor.

Gale still didn't say anything. He just sat there, staring. After a few minutes, he spoke.

"You helped Rory." It wasn't a question, so I kept waiting. "He told me. I was still too drugged to be able to talk at the time, but I could still hear him. He was telling me what happened. You helped him, in… District Eight, or something. I think… I think you saved his life."

I nodded. What was there to say?

"Thankyou." My eyes snapped back up to him. That wasn't what I had been expecting.

"For what?"

"For looking after my brother when I couldn't." The harsh edge was gone. He still wasn't my Gale, but he was as close as he had been since he got here.

"Well, you looked after Prim when I was in the arena," I whispered, wincing.

"What happened?" Hissed Gale, back to his cold self. "Where's Prim?"

"She's…" I felt tears well up in my eyes. I didn't want to say it out loud.

"Katniss."

"She didn't get to the bunker in time, during the bombings."

"WHAT?" Yelled Gale. "Katniss, what have you done?"

I took a step back, knowing what he was going to say, and wishing I could just block him out.

"You killed her," He pointed at me. "You started this war, you killed her! Why did you have to do this? Why? You'll kill all of us!"

"Gale, I did not kill my sister," I hissed. I wasn't yelling, but there was so much anger in my voice that Gale, even in his awful state, shrunk back. "What do you think I should have done? How do you think I could have stopped this? Not volunteered for the Games? She would have died in the first day."

"You could have let that mongrel die." I knew who he was referring to, and narrowed my eyes.

"No, I couldn't have."

"Yes, you could've! And none of this would have happened!" Now that we were back on the subject of Peeta, Gale was going wild. His pupils were dilating, his hands were clenching and unclenching, and his teeth gnashing together. "He'll kill you Katniss! He'll kill all of us! You have to get him now, before it's too late!"

"Gale, calm down," I said, backing away further until I was pressed against the wall. "Please."

Gale turned to me, and stared at me, his face twisted in rage. I stayed back against the wall, wondering if a doctor would come and help me. No one did though.

After a couple of minutes, Gale started taking deep breaths, and seemed to be trying to calm.

"Sorry," he muttered. "I can't… I just…" I nodded.

"Don't worry about it."

Gale seemed to consider me for a moment, almost like he had something to say, but wasn't sure if he should. He seemed to come to a decision, and began to speak again.

"You know, you're nothing like I remember." I froze. Did this mean what I thought it did? Was he going to say that whatever the Capitol made him think was wrong?

"What do you mean?"

"Well, before all of this happened, we were friends right?"

I nodded again, excitement and hope flooding my body.

"I can remember being friends. I can remember wanting to be more than friends. I remember thinking that you were perfect for me, and that you could do no wrong, other than choosing to be with him. But I can see clearly now. My mind isn't misted over by love or friendship." Gales face had become a hard mask, and he was all but spitting his words out of his mouth, forcing each one through my body. My previous hope was long gone, and had been replaced with dread. I wondered yet again what the Capitol could possibly have done to Gale to make him like this. "Every thing you did hurt me. I just shrugged it off, telling myself that it wasn't your fault, and that the Capitol was forcing you to do those things. But you know, I don't think that was your reason. Just your excuse. Do you have any idea how much you hurt me, Katniss?"

I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. I was a frozen statue, waiting for him to continue. As he spoke, I could feel the ice creeping up my body. Through my toes, my feet, and up my legs, freezing everything as it went.

"Every day I'd see you, parading about the place with him. You'd talk to me, yes. You'd hunt with me, yes. But you weren't my Katniss anymore. The first moment you got, you'd run away from me and skip back to Peeta. Every time I saw you I prayed that I could get you to come over to me. And every day you turned back around and ran along to your Victors Village. That killed me, Katniss. Every time you turned away, I felt like my heart was ripped in two. Even during the few months between the Games and the Victory Tour that you weren't talking to him, he was all you'd talk about. It was 'why can't Peeta see it my way?', or 'Why won't he let me explain?' It was pathetic. At first, I was glad that you were ridiculing him so much, but after a while, I realized that you were – are – just obsessed with everything he does.

"We had spent so much time together in the past, years of being friends. Yet, you threw it all away in a moment for someone else. If he asked you jump, you asked how high. If I asked you to so much as talk to me, you turned me away in favor of a wedding shoot, or something else just as ridiculous. Do you have any idea how much that hurt?"

I wanted to tell him it wasn't true; I had wanted to talk to him. All those months between the Games, I had wanted to see him. It was him that wouldn't talk to me. But I could see his point. From his perspective, I had been shunning him all that time… and, during the small amounts of time that I was with him, I was complaining about Peeta, or that Capitol forcing me to be with Peeta, or complaining about how Peeta was going to try and volunteer for the Quell. In a way Gale was right… And I had no argument against him.

Yes, the old Katniss would have fought. The old Katniss would have shoved it in Gales face and forced him to look at the bigger picture. But the old Katniss was dead. She had died along with Prim. And all that I could see was the destruction I had caused.

"I used to believe you were so perfect," continued Gale, still hurling his words at me like poisoned darts, "But now I see the truth. I've realized what a fool I was back then. For all I can care, he can have you. I'll just warn you though. He's going to try to kill you, Katniss. Watch your step. He's tried to kill me many times. But, if he's what you want, I'll stay out of the way. Maybe you can destroy him the same way you destroyed me."

He stopped, and just stared at me, waiting for my response. When I didn't give him any, he spoke up again.

"I am glad that you were around to help my family while I was in the Capitol, Katniss, and I have already thanked you for that. However, I do not want you talk to them anymore, you understand? I think that Hawthorne family has seen enough of your poison over the years. So just stay away from them, alright?"

I was so shocked at this outburst that I suddenly managed to find my voice.

"What?" I exclaimed. "You can't speak for them! I love Hazelle, Rory, Vick and Posy like my own family!"

"That's what I'm worried about," He hissed. "Look at what has happened to your sister!"

"I saved Rory's life! Does that count for nothing?"

"Yes. It was lucky, a spur of the moment, and I think you would save your own skin should it happen again."

"That's ridiculous! Gale, they're the only family I have left!"

"That's not true. Or have you forsaken your mother already? Just going to leave her to die, are you?"

"How dare you!"

"What, no answer?"

"Gale Hawthorne. You can insult me. You can tell me not to visit you again. Hell, you can try to kill my Peeta, and I would try to forgive you – because I know this isn't you, this is the tracker jacker venom talking. But you can not tell me not to talk to my family."

"They aren't your family. They're mine."

"Exactly," I hissed. Confusion flashed across Gale's face, but I didn't give him a chance to respond. I dashed through the door, slamming it behind me.

I groaned, and pressed my forehead into the cold steel of the door. I jumped when I felt warm arms wrap around me, but relaxed when I realised it was Peeta.

"Well, that could have been worse," came the falsely cheerful voice of the doctor. I tensed up again, but forced myself to calm. He only meant well. He was only trying to cheer me up. And he was right. It could have gone a lot worse.

Peeta noticed me tensing, and asked the doctor if we could leave.

"In a second," he replied. "I just need to ask Katniss a couple of questions.

To be fair, he did only ask me a couple. How I thought Gale reacted to certain things, how different he was to normal and so on. After only a few minutes, we were able to retreat back to our room. Thankfully, Finnick wasn't there – probably planning his wedding with Annie, so we were alone. We sat on the bed, is arms still tightly around me. I stayed silent. I felt like my life was coming to an end. What was I without Gale? He had always been there. Always.

"I'm sorry."

I stared up at Peeta with wide eyes.

"For what?"

"This is my fault."

My eyes grew, if possible, wider.

"How'd you figure that?"

"If it weren't for me, Gale wouldn't be like he is right now. He would still be your friend."

I realised that the doctor must have turned the audio on when I was with Gale, so Peeta would have heard… well, the end of our argument at least.

"No, Peeta. It's not your fault. It's not even nearly your fault. If you weren't here, they would have hijacked him to try and kill me, I'm sure of it."

"But that's what I'm confused about!" He huffed. "Why me? I don't mean to sound selfish or anything, I'm glad it's not you."

"Peeta, I think it would be impossible for you to be selfish." He rolled his eyes, then became serious again.

"What I don't understand is why they would want to try and kill me. I'm really nothing special. It's you that's forcing this rebellion along, Katniss. What am I? Nothing. Why did they waste their time getting Gale hijacked against me? All it's done is rip your friendship apart…" Peeta stopped, comprehension dawning on his face. "That's why," he whispered. "They did it to rip you and Gale apart even further. You see, it is my fault. Katniss, I'm sorry!"

He pulled me closer and pressed his face into my hair. I pushed him away slightly, so that I was still in his arms, but so that he was forced to look at me.

"Peeta, it wasn't your fault. I think you're right, that the Capitol did this to get to me, but not to force me away from Gale. He could have done something much simpler to Gale to do that; for example, he could have made Gale hate me even more, rather than making him hate you. So, that's not why I think they did it. Now, I don't mean to sound conceited or anything," I said, similar to what Peeta had before, "I'm just sure that this is right. You see, I reckon they didn't mean for Gale to fail in his attempted murder to force away our friendship. I reckon they wanted him to succeed in killing you."

"But that brings us back to my original point. Why?"

"Because they knew that it would rip me apart." Peeta sighed.

"Katniss, I don't think that having your best friend murder your other friend would rip you apart. I think it would just fuel your anger and make you even more formidable."

"Maybe, if it was another friend that Gale would have been killing. But you're so much more than a friend to me, Peeta." His eyes widened, and his mouth opened slightly. I took a deep breath. I needed to say this. I've known it for a while now. If I don't say it now, I might never be able to pick up the courage. "I can't live without you. You're a part of me now, Peeta, and I-"

"Stop." Peeta covered my mouth with his hand, his eyes still wide. "Don't say something you'll regret later. I know you're stressed out right now, and I know you're probably not feeling yourself. Just stay quiet for now, and we'll talk about it later, okay?"

"No," I cried. "Peeta, this isn't a spur of the moment thing. I've known for a long time, so I know it isn't because of what just happened with Gale. I sure about it since that time in Two, when I… got shot." Peeta winced at the memory, but I didn't. It was a nice memory for me, even if I had been in a life-threatening situation at the time. Peeta had made that seem insignificant with just three simple words. "Peeta, you remember what you said to me that day, right? When you were yelling for help?"

Peeta nodded, apparently to stunned to find words. I'm sure he knew what I was talking about, but seemed to be trying not to believe it.

Suddenly, my nerves returned. What was this? The mighty Katniss Everdeen, who could blow up career supplies and shoot a squirrel for a hundred meters away was afraid to tell a boy how she felt? Well, I guess I never was one for emotions.

Instead, I sighed, and reached up, pulling Peeta down towards me, and I kissed him.

Peeta tired to push me away, but I held him tighter, and just kept kissing. Soon enough, he wrapped his arms around me and started to kiss me back. He pulled me closer, and I pressed myself up against his chest. I bit down on his bottom lip, and a moan rippled through his throat. I gasped against his lips as he grabbed my hips, and I grasped at his hair, kissing him with more passion than I had previously thought possible.

After a while, we broke away for air, and I leaned against his chest. My nerves gone, I smiled, and said what I knew I should have said long before.

"I love you Peeta."

Peeta pulled away, and stared into my eyes.

"Remember what I-"

"No, I mean it. I really, really mean it. I've known for a while now." Peeta's face softened, and he leaned in to kiss me again.

"I love you too, Katniss."

Alright, they're finally together! Yay! And, it's my longest chapter so far. Man, this took forever and three History classes to write. What else are History classes good for, anyway? And yes, Gale is a but tetchy in this chapter... (a bit?) But don't worry, Katniss still gets to talk to Rory later...

In the next chapter there will be a wedding!