A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Unfortunately there aren't many of you so I lost my motivation for a minute and thats why I haven't updated in a while. But never fear - I will finish this story and soon.
Oh, and I still don't own the wolves. sigh.
Quil POV
Somebody pinch me because I have to be dreaming.
I have seen Claire every day since the day I almost died and she found out about the imprint. Even if for only a few minutes, I have seen her and gotten my little dose of Claire. We casually hold hands like we used to and I can't get enough of her touch. It was strange – from the start her touch affected me but feeling other people and things was dull for a few days before my sense of touch returned to normal. Living without that sensation has made me more sensitive to it now and I can't get enough of the feel of Claire's soft little hand in mine. I haven't been this happy in years and my mom couldn't be more thrilled to see me acting more like myself. I'm finally feeling comfortable in my own skin again and I feel settled and connected to the world again.
On that day when Claire said she wanted to make it up to me I panicked. I didn't want that to be the reason she spent time with me. I've been around a lot of imprints over the years and at some point most of them struggle to accept that their guy loves them, not because he is forced to by magic, but for being who they are. Similarly, I don't want Claire to stay in my life because she feels guilty. I want her to stay because it's what she wants. And I may be a fool but one day I want her to love me like I love her, not just because it's expected. But for now I'm more than content with what we have because I can feel that it is genuine and true.
Things are going slow between Claire and I right now which is fine. We don't always talk about important things, but we talk and we are comfortable around each other which is still huge to me considering all that we lost over the last few years. I avoid talking about that dark time as much as possible, which is difficult sometimes because Claire has questions. I know she still feels bad for what I did to myself but it wasn't her fault. I wasn't exactly in my right mind all the time.
Claire doesn't like to talk about her old 'friends' in Makah much. I use the term friend loosely since she wasn't very close to them and they caused so much of her fear and pain regarding me. But Andrea has been good to her so far, for which I am grateful. I get the impression that Claire has not felt this comfortable in a long time. So I am patient and wait to see her after she spends time with friends. I am very careful how I act around Claire when I see her with Andrea because she is still sensitive about what they will think and she wants to avoid a repeat of what happened to her before.
Another topic we avoid is the end of the summer when she will leave. I know she has to go home and she is afraid of what waits for her there. She has told me how she only has one real friend she cares about and she is nervous to see Kevin at school. I've been thinking that I can be very careful when I come to visit and make sure people don't see me so she won't have to deal with the backlash. It may be hard, but I'll do it. She's mentioned coming here on weekends but she won't be able to drive for a few more months and even then she can't take the car. I've been watching for an inexpensive fixer upper at the lots because I can do most of the work myself but I've had no luck so far. We will figure it out.
But now we are a week into August and Claire will have to leave soon. I just got off work and I'm going to Sam's to see Claire for a while. Emily has been great about everything and often lets me stay for dinner so I can have more time with her. Consequently, I've started slipping Sam some extra money to cover all the extra food she makes for me. He fought me at first but he has a young family to care for and I've only got myself to watch out for at home so I finally convinced him to accept it.
I noticed a different car in front of Sam's before I let myself in the front door. I saw Sally in the kitchen talking to Emily and I can't help but feel nervous. I'm not ready for her to take Claire home yet. I thought I had two more weeks. Sally looked up at me and smiled, coming straight to me and hugging me.
"Hi Quil. It's good to see you." she greeted me warmly.
"Hey. How are you?" I tried to sound normal.
"I'm good. I had a day off and thought I would come see Claire. She's up in her room and could probably use some help." She released me with a smile and I hurried up to Claire's room.
I knocked on the open door and she looked up from an open box on her bed. "Quil!" she came to me, gave me a quick hug and pulled me into her room. "I'm glad you are here. Will you help me unpack these?" she pointed to the three boxes lined up on her bed.
"What's this?" I asked.
"I think those go on my desk." She pointed to the box furthest from her. "Just pull everything out and I can organize it in a minute. She turned back to the open box and pulled out several folded sweaters and took them to her dresser.
Did Sally really bring her some winter things? Could she be staying? I didn't dare to ask the question yet but I felt like jumping around and celebrating when I opened the box to see her school bag and other supplies and books from home. Yes!
I noticed that Claire was watching me out of the corner of her eye with a slight smirk on her lips. I decided to play along.
"So what's all this for Claire?"
"It's just some stuff I asked mom to bring me. It might come in handy soon." She tried to sound casual but failed. I could hear the giggle in her voice as she smugly watched me pull several books out of the box in front of me.
"This is a lot of reading for only a few weeks." I said. I needed to hear her say it. I needed her to tell me she was staying, because I knew what that meant. She would be staying because of me – because she wasn't afraid and she still wanted to spend time with me. It wouldn't matter what excuse or reason she gave me, herself, or anyone else. I knew what it would really mean.
"I guess I better get started then. As soon as these boxes are empty I'm kicking you out." She teased.
"Claire." I complained.
She couldn't contain her grin and she actually started giggling. "Come here." She pulled me over to the other side of her room and we sat on the virtually non-existent empty edge of her bed. "So I had an idea and then I talked to my parents and Sam and Emily are okay with it, so . . . I'm going to stay here until I graduate from high school." The words tumbled out of her in a rush and then she actually squealed. "Isn't that great?"
If the guys wouldn't have teased me to death I might have squealed along with her. I stopped myself though and gave her a huge smile as I felt myself breathe easier.
"That's the best news I've ever heard." I told her honestly.
"Good. Because if you didn't want me to stay then I wouldn't." she said, calming slightly.
"Why wouldn't I want you to stay?" I asked, and then I scowled at her as the answer came to me. "Claire. You have to stop thinking that I would be happier without you – I've already proven that completely wrong. I love being around you and I'm glad you are going to be close. It'll save me whole bunch of running to Makah and I might actually gain some weight."
"Yeah, I'm sure you'll get so fat just because I'm in your own town." She rolled her eyes.
"Hey, it could happen. There hasn't been a fat wolf yet, but they broke the mold when they made me." I grinned at her.
She scoffed and stood up, going back to her boxes. "I want to finish this really fast and then go spend a little more time with mom before she goes."
"Okay." I went back to work with her and in less than five minutes we had everything put away and went out to the kitchen to see Sally. She ended up staying for dinner and insisted on helping clear the table. Once the kids were busy washing everything Sally got my attention and pulled me aside.
"We haven't really spoken about everything that happened." She began and I saw the sorrow in her eyes. "If I had known what she was doing . . ."
"Sally, its okay." I stopped her. "Things are good now. Thanks for letting her stay here. I know you'll miss her."
"Well, she wasn't exactly thrilled about coming home and going back to her old school anyway, and I haven't seen her this happy in years, so it's the best thing for everyone. This way she can start fresh with her new friends and she can be here with you."
"You know we'll take good care of her."
Sally lowered her voice. "Yes I do. Speaking of which, how are you feeling about her?"
I matched her tone. "I've always loved Claire. Her wants and needs are the most important thing to me. That will never change."
She nodded. "I know, but what about you? After all this time, all you've been through, you deserve to be happy too."
"I am happy." I smiled at her to reinforce the truth in my words. But I wasn't about to tell her how deep my feelings for her daughter truly ran. Or how gorgeous I thought Claire was. Or how I want to kiss her and spend hours touching her soft skin. Or. . .
Sally returned my smile and then turned her attention to her daughter in the kitchen. She made the rounds, saying goodbye to everyone and Claire walked with her out to the car.
Claire came back inside a few minutes later looking just a little sad. She came straight to me and grabbed my hand.
"Are you okay honey?" I asked.
"I just miss my family, you know?"
"I know." I squeezed her hand and led her over to the couch. I knew just what would cheer her up. I had her sit down and I put Serendipity in the DVD player then joined her on the couch. Sam and Emily joined us once all the kids were in bed and the four of us quietly enjoyed one of Claire's favorite movies.
. . .
Claire POV
It was so much fun to surprise Quil with the news that I am staying here for the next three years. His smile when I told him was exactly what I'd hoped for. I was glad I could make him happy for once. He may think I made the decision just for him, but that's not entirely true. Of course I wanted to find a way to spend more time around him anyway, but I was absolutely freaked out at the idea of going back to school and being around the kids I grew up with, so going to a new school was an extra little bonus for me.
Since Kevin's disastrous visit I've talked to Beth on the phone a few times. It took me an hour to convince her that Quil is my good friend and that he would never do the things people accused him of. I swore to her that my aunt and uncle would never let someone treat me that way either, and after the way Sam scared them all she believed me. But she told me that Kevin was a nightmare to be around for the next week after they came and he's just waiting for me to come back. If I didn't have any other reasons to run screaming from my old school, Kevin alone could provide a whole bus load. So really, it's just a win/win as far as I'm concerned. Now I can stay in La Push where I can be around Quil and not have headaches, and Quil can get his life back together now that he doesn't think his imprint rejected him.
That still breaks my heart. I hate knowing what I did to him and when I have nightmares they usually involve a dead chocolate brown wolf. I don't want to tell him that though since he already worries about me way too much. But I'm not complaining because he takes such good care of me too. Like when I had to say goodbye to mom after that visit. It hit me harder than I thought it would, even though I know I'll still see my family and go and visit some weekends. And at 15 I'm all about getting some independence, but my parents are being so great about everything and so supportive and I don't know how to thank them. So when I went back inside Quil knew just what to do. He put in one of my favorite movies and he just sat with me and held my hand all night.
Emily and Sam were right about the touch thing. I mean, just being in the same room as Quil has a calming, peaceful effect on me in general and my headaches are pretty much just a memory now, but touch does even more. So we often end up holding hands when we are together because one or the other of us needs it, and sometimes just because it is becoming habit. A really good habit too. It's just too cool that this amazing, handsome guy pays attention to me at all, and on top of that I get to hold his hand almost every day. I can deal with that.
So I'm going to start at my new school in a few days and the summer is almost over. I've really enjoyed being here again, spending time with my cousins and getting to know the pack again. They feel like extended family and they've been very forgiving and accepting of me. That means so much to me.
And I also have new friends! Andrea has been so nice to me and it's really different that my other friendships I've had before. She knows that I am really close with my family and she doesn't tease me about it. Quil has been careful to give me plenty of time with friends away from him so no one can spread lies again, but I don't think that would happen here anyway. It probably helps that I'm older too so people don't think I'm so helpless. But even with all the good times with Andrea I still look forward to seeing Quil at the end of the day. Pathetic, right? I don't ever get tired of seeing him though.
I have a plan now too. I know that Quil sees himself as my protector and he will do anything to make me happy, but I'm afraid he only sees me as a little kid still. I want to change that but I know that I have to be patient too since I am way younger than him. But maybe by the end of high school I can prove to him that I can be mature. He told me that he doesn't expect anything to happen between us like the rest of the imprints, so is it wrong that I want him as more than a friend? We can't right now, but he's the only guy I've ever been interested in dating. That has to mean something right? I just hope he will be able to see me that way someday too.
. . .
Christmas break starts today! I survived my first semester in my new school and it was probably the most I've enjoyed school in years. The classes and my teachers are fine, they aren't much different for me, but I actually have good friends. Maybe for the first time ever. It's such a relief to not have to watch every little thing I say around them and worry about what they will say behind my back. They all know Quil is a good friend of the Uleys, so when I talk about him or the other guys in the pack no one freaks out that they are so much older than me. It turns out Sam and his old 'gang' are pretty well known around here so no one even comments, just like it's expected for me to know and hang out with these people. What a relief!
As much as I like my friends, I am most excited because Quil and I can hang out a lot more during my break since he won't have to wait until my homework is done to be around me. He is taking some time off work on top of the time he will get off because of the holiday anyway so we can have some fun. I am so excited!
I hurried home after promising to see Andrea at Cory's party in a few days. I walked in the door, waved to Emily in passing and dumped my backpack in my room. My English teacher gave us an assignment to do over the break. Seriously! But I could handle that later. Right now I had a certain tall, dark and handsome man to find. I went back out to the main room to ask Emily.
"Has Quil called today?" I asked as I joined her in the kitchen. I grabbed a glass and got some water to drink.
"Hello to you too." She teased me with a grin. "I haven't heard from him yet. He may still be at work."
I shook my head. "No, he said he was getting off early. I'll call him."
"Will you two be here for dinner tonight?" Emily asked.
"I don't know what we're going to do. I just know I want to get plenty of Quil-time while I'm out of school." I answered quickly, before really thinking.
"Quil time, huh? Don't you see him every day?" Emily poked me in the ribs.
"Yeah, well, sometimes it's pretty short, especially if I have lots of homework. I don't have whole days with him very much and we need to plan my break so we have a couple of those." I said.
"I know Quil can be funny sometimes, but is there any other reason you are so eager to spend time with him?" Emily asked with a knowing look.
"I'm his imprint. I don't need a reason." I said and stuck my tongue out at her. Childish, I know, but I can joke that way with Emily. Now that I know everything I realize that she, Sam and the rest of the pack used to be pretty careful around me so they wouldn't give anything away. But now things are different; more relaxed somehow, and I can talk more easily with Emily, Kim and the other women too.
Emily just laughed at me like I knew she would. "Alright then, go find your wolf."
"Are you talking about me again?" a deep voice said from the doorway and I spun around to see Quil leaning casually against the doorjamb. Why did he have to look so hot doing nothing at all?
"Quil!" I practically ran across the room to him and he opened his arms to give me a quick hug.
"Hi honey. What's going on?" he asked after leaving a quick kiss on the top of my head.
"We have to figure out what we are doing while I'm off. I don't want to waste any time." I told him as we walked back into the kitchen and I took another drink.
"Remind me when you are going home." He said and he didn't hide how he didn't like the idea of me leaving.
"I'll only be gone the 24th and 25th. I'll make dad drive me back early on the 26th, I promise. Then we will have until after the New Year." I said.
"I can't believe your parents are making you go home for a little thing like Christmas." He complained.
"Can you blame them? We get her the rest of the year now." Emily reminded him.
"Yeah, but they are just family. It's not like they are someone important: like me." Quil said and gave me his best 100 watt smile.
"You know I'll miss you too." I told him and his smile only seemed to grow.
"We better figure out what to do when you are here then. Are you up for the usual, traditional holiday activities or do I have to be creative?" Quil asked.
"I'm up for anything." I challenged him and was rewarded with a mischievous twinkle in his eye.
"You better mean it when you say something like that." He warned me with a wink.
I couldn't help but think that any girl he set his sights on wouldn't stand a chance once he unleashed his charms on her. Then I couldn't help but wish it would be me.
Quil took the slice of freshly baked bread Emily offered him and ate it in a few bites. Then he settled in to watch me spread some raspberry jam on mine and then eat. I stared right back at him and we traded smiles as I wondered what he was thinking when he watched me like that.
"If I'm going to plan properly," he said, "then I need to know if there are any family things or other plans when I can't have you other than when you go home."
"Um. . ." the words he used muddled my brain for moment before I could answer. "I guess there's a big New Year's Eve party here, but Sam said you usually come to that too, and uh, I have to go to a party with people from school at Cory's on the 27th."
"Cory?" Quil asked and Emily waited for the answer as well.
"Yeah, he invited us all today. He wanted to have it on New Year's but his parents are throwing a big party so he's doing it right between Christmas and New Years." I said.
"Who is Cory?" Quil asked.
"He lives down the street from Andrea and he sits with us at lunch. He's just one of my school friends." I told them. Did I dare hope that I detected some jealousy in his tone?
"You know Cory's dad, Quil. He works with Charlie at the station in Forks." Emily said.
"Oh, yeah. I didn't realize he was your age." Quil recovered quickly. "Alright Emily, do I have any more restrictions?"
"What?" she looked confused.
"Any other times you plan on keeping Claire too busy to play with me?" he asked, still looking slightly unhappy about my party plans.
"I don't think there is anything else so you can stop pouting now." Emily teased him. Quil looked a little embarrassed and then turned back to me.
"What about homework?" he asked.
"I just have to write a little paper for English."
Quil grabbed my hand and started leading me back toward my room. "Come on, let's go get it done now so there are no more excuses."
. . .
I finished the paper quickly that night with Quil's help. The next day we went snowshoeing and built a snowman and snow wolf for Quil. When we got home we made hot cocoa and put in a movie so we could curl up on the couch and he warmed me up before I had to pack a small bag to go home for two days. Quil came the next morning to 'get a goodbye hug' to last him the whole time I was gone. I lightly teased him along with Sam and Alex, trying my best not to show how glad I was that he came.
Mom drove me home and it was nice and slightly surreal to be there again. My room hasn't changed or anything but it didn't feel as much like home as Emily's house does now. It was also really nice to spend some time with Alyssa and Devon again: being away from them really made me appreciate my siblings more. Christmas Eve and Day were fun and I was happy to see that everyone liked the gifts I found even though I was on a very tight budget set by my parents. I had to get creative while searching for gifts and while it was challenging it was also kind of fun. Quil was also very helpful with the shopping and it was fun to spend that time with him too. I felt bad that my whole two days home I had a slight nagging ache in my head and chest. I wasn't about to tell anyone about that though since they've waited so long for me to come for a visit. It's just hard to find a good reason to leave La Push on the weekends when I have the most time to spend with Quil. It's scary how my life revolves around him.
Dad and I had a good chat while he drove me back the day after Christmas. He and I don't get to talk on the phone as much as mom and I do so we got caught up on each other's lives. It was really nice. And I was relieved when dad just laughed at the sight of Quil waiting for us on Sam's front steps. The moment the car stopped he opened my door and pulled me up into a tight hug, wrapping his arms around my waist and lifting my feet off the ground. I heard him breathe in deep and slow as he buried his face in my hair and I felt his shoulders relax. I felt better too as his warmth enfolded me. This is where I belong.