z0mg Harrassment!!1!
A/N" Chyeah I couldn't think of anything.. plus it's been like 4 months since I've written a thing. XDD Please forgive me!
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"Have a safe trip home, Richard! Goodbye, Courtney!"
The Kalinowskis waved as their long lost relatives escalated down the driveway. Milla wished Tweek all the luck in the world for their Sexual Harassment "debate" tomorrow. Would this actually take effect on the school? Lauren skittered to the door to see them off. She barely had to wave because the car was already out of sight.
"Well that was a nice family dinner, WASN'T IT." Laurens father looked her straight in the eye.
"YEP!" Lauren ran upstairs. "I'm uh, going in the shower!" Lauren justified her speediness before her father came blundering after her.
She was damn lucky to have a bathroom only her and Milla shared, so she could check her room on the way. There was her long gymnastics rope hanging out the window, tied to her bedpost. Lying right beside the knot of rope was Stan's wool knit cap. Lauren ran over to it and snuggled it. It smelled like cherry pie and laundry detergent. She'd decided right then and there that it was the best combination she'd ever smelled.
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Kristin was on the phone with Emily, and they were bitching about Bebe's sexual harassment.
"Kay, I like Bebe and all, but, she got me suspended for 3 days! I was a lucky fuck to not have my parents give my teachers their work numbers, or I wouldn't have gotten home to delete the message!"
"Oh shit, can you still come help with the debate?" Emily crossed her fingers and toes. Kristin was probably the best arguer she'd ever known.
"I don't really care if I couldn't. I would still come for JUSTICE!"
"Okay, great! Kay, the first thing we should say would be something like.. "Okay, Kenny is a needle in a haystack, it's not like were ALL like Kenny and we'd ALL sexually harass people."
"That's not bad. Also, "There's no agenda behind holding hands with someone!"
This was going to be a fun debate. Bebe, and whoever would support her would have to come up with some KICK ASS arguments.
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Kristin hung up the phone after lots of planning and note-taking. She'd read on the bulliten board (after tearing dozens of pink papers off) that the debate wouldn't be infront of a large audience, so it would strictly be the support groups, perhaps a judge, and a couple teachers. Everyone else would be in their classes.
Good fucking thing, too. Kristin can argue with a small group of people, anything over 25 is like AHHH!!1!
Why the hell was everyones line busy?! Cartman's line had been busy for a good three hours. Where was he?! And why were all the girls ALWAYS with their fucking boyfriends. She was going to have a slumber party!
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Carly was in a field, surrounded by lilies and daisies. Her short hair was surprisingly still flowing, and her black dress with the spiderwebs on it felt cool and soft as silk. In fact, it was made of silk.. weird.
A shadow came over her, blocking the sun. It seemed to all be in slow motion. She flung her head towards the shadow, all she saw was a sun-stricken shadowy figure on a horse. She squinted to see who it was, but didn't need to. He jumped off his horse and directly onto her. He was larger than her, but light as a feather. They rolled laughing down a hill.. but as they were slowing down, she got a whiff of him. Golden Oreos-
"AAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!"
Carly lurched out of her dreamland. Was she screaming in her dream? It was exactly 4:27am.
"OH MA GAWW IT'S GONE!"
She grinned, and fell back asleep on Cartman's shoulder. CARTMANS SHOULDER?!
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The sun rose, Bebe rolled out of bed, combed her curls, and put on her spiffiest red sweater. Nothing was going to divert her from her goal. Extinguish all who were like Kenny, and live a safer, cleaner life. No more grossness.
WARPEDD HUH!?
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Kyle showed up at Emily's door while her hair was still a rat's nest, and she was still wearing her yellow penguin pyjamas.
"Makes a girl feel really lovely at the beginning of the day." She slammed the door and got ready in a flash.
Once in her Nirvana
hoodie, leggings, and legwarmers (present from Carly!) complete with
her locket dangling out of her hoodie, she was all set. She smiled at
his enthusiastic face.
"My dad helped me with the debate, I
think we're gonna win!" He had a whole binder of arguments to
choose from.
Emily closed her eyes and sighed. Maybe triumph could be won by anyone.
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Cartman woke up to the smell of old coffee breath. He looked up at Ms.Schroeder and shivered all over. He felt some weight directly in his lap, and looked down to see Carly's head buried deep in it. He blushed a little, then directed his attention back to the lady who reeked of Aspirin and pee.
"WHATTA YOU LITTLE YOUNGINS THINK YAHR DOIN IN HEER?!"
Carly woke up screaming, then looked at Cartman, and back at her lap. Cartman smiled weakly at her turned away head, and chose to act fast. He grabbed the steaming Tim's and whipped it directly at her ugly wrinkled face. Ms.Schroeder shrieked in pain, and tried to grab the kids.
"That's what you get, uglah skank!! Go, Carly!" Carly grabbed Cartman's chunky hand and fleeted out the door.
After about 10 seconds of running, Carly pulled a way past out of breath Cartman into a bush.
"I don't think she's going to follow us..." Carly started, "but we'd better make it to the debate."
Cartman felt an urge to do
something foolish like fart on someone or taunt someone, but he held
it in for Carly. He tried closing his eyes and counting to 10, but
all he got was visions of scary things. Meh, thats what he always
sees when he closes his eyes. Carly poked her head out of the bush,
and Cartman sneaked a peek at her behind.
"Okay, we're
clear!" She crawled out and thought hard. That could've been the
perfect place to start an affair. Goddamnit. It's not like he's over
Kristin at all, anyways. Don't even think about ruining what you
have with Tweek, Carly, She told herself.
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Tweek was the first to get there, shaking in anticipation. Next came Bebe sporting a businesswoman-esque look. Milla came with her sister, who was wearing a hat identical to Stan's. Looks like its a commitment present. Tweek grinned at her cousin. They all waited outside the conference room, Tweek and Lauren conversing with eye contact, Milli twisting a kleenex around, Bebe looking quite sure of herself, for the event that was to come.
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HAHAHA Until next time, EMILIAH! XD It was about freaking time my closure had changed.
