Itachi and Shikamaru go to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory!
Once upon a time Itachi opened his mailbox and pulled out a chocolate scented envelope that was covered in saliva. Eyeing it suspiciously, he ripped it open with Kisame's teeth and read the letter.
'Dear Itachi-chan
I want your body you to come visit me in my delicious chocolate factory, all the snacks will be free!
Yours truly
Orichimaru
Willy Wonka'
Itachi thought to himself 'Can't argue with that' and set out for the location scrawled with 'Orichimaru's secret base. Keep it a secret!' On the map.
Sometime later, Itachi arrived at the poorly concealed secret base, and knocked on the poorly concealed door. A poorly concealed Kabuto opened it and let the suspicious Akatsuki member inside.
"It's good you're here, I was just about to betray Orichi- Whip up a batch of cookies!" Kabuto quickly muttered, ushering the Uchiha inside. Itachi inspected the fruit covered wall paper.
"If you lick it tastes like sedat- Fruit! I mean fruit!" Kabuto uttered, scampering away.
"KABUTO WHERES THE ASPRIN?" Came a paedophilic yell from the other room. The sounds of dishes being thrown at the wall echoed through the nearly empty hall. Itachi coolly raised an eyebrow, because he's cool like that, and licked the wallpaper. It really did taste like sedatives!
Itachi passed out. Because he's cool like that.
Meanwhile the hero of the story was sleeping his ass of near Orichimaru's secret base. Meanwhile a short orange and green man, escaped through the front door, but was quickly tazared by a sound ninja and dragged inside. Shikamaru slowly opened one eye and stared at the commotion.
'I'm seeing things' he thought to himself and settled off back to sleep.
Suddenly a mysterious shadow loomed over our hero! It was Kabuto! Oh noes!
Kabuto reared his chocolate scented knapsack and captured the sleeping ninja! Shikamaru groaned sleepily and rolled over. Kabuto sweatdropped. But none the less he had captured the lazy little cun- shinobi!
Sometime later the hero and Itachi woke up above a boiling hot vat of snakes! And chocolate! And there was some pocky in there somewhere! Itachi eagerly looked down at the vat of poisoned and chocolatley vat of evil that was bubbling away happily. Orichimaru was standing over it grating some parmesan cheese into the concoction. Itachi raised his eyebrows coolly, because he's cool like that. Shikamaru was taking a nap, horizontally, thus breaking the laws of physics which caused Stephen Hawking to appear! Stephen Hawking growled with his computerised voice at the Nara, who continued to nap, ignoring the boring scientist whose documentaries needed more motorbikes. Since the laws of physics were broken, the vat of snakes, chocolate and pocky floated out of the cauldron, and dumped itself on the evil snake sannin. Shikamaru snored and woke up. Itachi clapped to him because HE was the HERO, Which had saved his life and that of five children who were waving around golden tickets.
Suddenly Stephen Hawking turned into Johnny Depp and promptly escorted the children around the evil villain's base, but that's another story.
Itachi just shrugged, because he's cool like that, and Shikamaru rolled over for another nap. Kabuto walked in with a knife in fork in his hands.
"So Dinners off?" He asked slowly.