Edward was about to do the stupidest thing he will ever do.
"Do I REALLY have to?" Ed complained as he stood impaticently in Mustang's office.
"Yes, yes you do. You lost a bet. Now pay up" Roy sneered at the end of his response, just thinking about what the young alchemist was about to do.
Ed sighed in defeat. " Fine..." He walked out into the room where everyone between Furey and Hawkeye were. He took a deep breath and began to do the most retarded thing ever.
"I am really special cause there's only one of me. Look at my smile, I'm so damn happy, other people are jealous of me." Ed made sure that he looked as miserable as possible as Roy snickered behind him. Ed was also trying to make sure the others knew that he had to do this, and it was not free will to sing about his oh-so-happy life. He continued on, his face feeling hot, and staring at his feet in shame.
"When I'm sad and loney, I like to sing this song. It cheers me up and shows me that I won't be sad for long. Oh-oh-oh, I'm so happy, I can barely breath. Puppy dogs and sugar frogs and kittens, baby teeth. Watch out all you mothers. I'm happy it's hard core. Happy as a coupon for a" Ed hesitates and then points at Riza -"Twenty dollar whore!"
Riza looked like she was about to shoot the kid.
" I'm really happy. I'm-" Hesitation "- Sugar coated me. Happy, good , anger, bad, that's my philosophy."
He turned around to Roy and looked up into his onyx eyes in a pleading way. " I can't do this, bastard, I'm not happy..." Roy looked back down at him sternly.
" I thought I said no un-happy lines!"
Ed growled before continuing on, a little faster this time. " "I am really special cause there's only one of me. Look at my smile, I'm so damn happy, other people are jealous of me." He held up his hands in a depressed sorta way, looking so miserable and lowered his voice at this stupid line as well. " These are my love handles and this is my spout, but if you tip me over then momma said knock you out!"
Ed stopped for a second, staring at the ground in pure embarrssement. Then I had an actual happy thought. Improvise.
"I am special. I am happy. I am gunna heave. Welcome to my happy world, now get your shit and leave!" For once, Ed could actually smile and be happy about what he was saying. " I am happy, I am good, I'm- " Out of lines... He thought Then he picked up quickly. "- I'm outta here!"
Ed stormed for the door and opened in harsly before turning around and pointing a accusing finger towards Mustang. " SCREW YOU!" With that, the door slammed.
And just about that time, Roy fell to the floor, having a seizure from laughing so hard. Everyone but Hawkeye followed.
Hawkeye just frowned at the men around her. " Poor Ed..."
A/N: I'm sorry, I just had to do it!