WARNING!
For this chapter and this chapter only, I have amped the rating to M for stronger language.
"Mr. Mustang, thanks for coming to your preormance review."
"No problem."
Preformance review day. It was- no doubt- the weridest day Tervis Mason ever had.
Tervis was in charge of Colonel Roy Mustangs review. So here he was...
He cleared his thoat. "So, you're in charge here. Is that fair to say?"
Mustang stared back at him like it was obvious. "Absolutely. I'm the boss."
Ok, so we're getting somewhere. Don't know where, but its somewhere. Tervis mused before continuing. " Ok, so take us through a day in the life of 'the boss'."
The smirk that appeared on the Colonels face scared Tervis shittless. "Well the first thing I do is-"
He jumped onto on his desk..."Talk to corporate!"
"LIKE A BOSS!" From behind the desk, a small blonde popped out and popped back behind quickly. The only thought that was going through Tervis's head at that moment was...
WHAT THE FUCK?
"Approve memos!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Lead a workshop!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Remember birthdays!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Direct workflow!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
Ok... so that sounds normal enough...
"My own bathroom!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Micromange!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Promote Synergy!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
Wait... what?
"Hit on Riza!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Get rejected!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Swallow saddness!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Send some faxes!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
O...k?
"Call a sex line!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
WHAT?
"Cry deeply!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Demand a refund!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Eat a bagel!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Harrassment lawsuit!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Now, hold on!" Tervis tried to interject, but it was in vain.
"No promotion!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Fifth of vodka!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Shit on Riza's desk!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Can I just-"
"Buy a gun!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"In my mouth! ... Oh fuck man, I can't fucking doing it, SHIT! Pussy out!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"WHAT THE FUC-"
"Puke on Riza's desk!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Jump out the window!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Suck a dudes dick!"
"EWWW!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Score some coke!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Crash my car!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Suck my own dick!"
"OH MY GOD! WHAT THE HELL!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Eat some chicken strips!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Chop my balls off!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"HOLY SHIT!"
"Black out in the sewer!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Meet a giant fish!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Fuck his brains out!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Turn into a jet!"
"I'm not even going to comment anymore.."
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Bomb the Drachman's!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Crash into the sun!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
"Now I'm dead!"
"LIKE A BOSS!"
Tervis was utterly stunned. "Uh-huh... So that's an average day for you then?"
Mustang jumped off the desk a leaned against it, all 'cool like.' "No doubt."
"You chop your balls off and die?"
"Hhhell yeah,"
"And I think at, uh, one point there you said something about sucking your own dick?"
"Nope!"
Hopelessly confused now. " Actually, I'm pretty sure you did."
"Nah that ain't me." The Colonel rolled his eyes and smiled. Or smirked. However you see it.
"Ok, well, this has been eye opening for me..." More like a reason to rat you out for this...
"I'm the boss."
Ummm " Yeah, no I got that. You said it about four hunderend times."
"I'm the boss."
"Yeah yeah I got it!"
"I'm the boss."
At this point, Tervis had started walking away. "No, I heard you! See you later!" Not.
In the distance, as Tervis closed the door, he was sure he heard something that was all too familar by now.
"LIKE A BOSS!"
Yep. Yeah. River part 2 is still a work in progress. But so you don't get bored, I gave you this. I heard this song, and instantly thought of Roy.
So here you go, with Roy singing he's a boss, and Ed backing him up.
Song is Like a Boss by The Lonely Island. I do not own FMA or this song. Nor do a claim the as mine. Thanks for reading! Please review!...
LIKE A BOSS!