Authors Note:
I do not own any rights. Jo Rowling own everything. Thanks as always to my lovely Betas. Enjoy =)
Lily:
As summer wore on, Lily and Severus fell into a comfortable rhythm in which their days were filled with Lily catching up on reading her favorite muggle magazines and books, trying to and failing to get Severus to enjoy her favorite muggle music and television shows, and occasionally walking down to the park by their houses where they had first met all those years ago.
Lily couldn't explain why, but by simply spending all this time with Severus it felt like they had come to know more about each other than they ever had. Indeed their friendship was stronger than ever and while this made Lily happy, she had some misgivings as well.
These were confirmed when one day someone most unexpected showed up at the front door shortly after lunch. Lily's mother had answered the door bell and her voice rang out from the entry way "Severus, dear! Someone is asking for you at the door!"
"Be right there Mrs. Evans." He replied getting to his feet, Lily right behind him.
When they got to the door, he was taken aback to see none other than Lucius Malfoy standing there looking quite suspicious. "Good afternoon Severus. A word please?" He greeted them, completely ignoring Lily's presence at all.
Severus turned to Lily "I'm sorry, this should only be a moment. I'll be right back. Ok?"
She was furious and she had every right to be. She knew exactly who and what Lucius Malfoy was as well as what he thought of her. She was astonished that he had the audacity to show up on her doorstep.
"Ya that's fine." She replied never taking her cold glare from Lucius's indifferent face.
Lucius turned and walked out of the house clearly expecting Severus to follow, he gave Lily a quick peck on the check before he followed the tall pale former Slytherin.
Lily went back inside the house to join her mother in cleaning up the kitchen with a feeling of dread.
"Did Sev leave honey?" Her mother asked, handing her a dish towel to dry the dishes she washed and handed her.
"Ya, that was one of his friends from Hogwarts. He was a few years ahead of us and in Sev's house." She answered her mother, unsure of whether she should also tell her mother that Lucius Malfoy was a particularly prejudiced wizard who thought that Lilya and her kind were lower than the dirty beneath his feet.
Her thoughts, however were interrupted by her mother, "So…what's going on with you and Sev?" she asked with a knowing grin.
"Nothing." Lily replied evasively as a small blush warmed her cheeks.
There was in fact nothing going on between the two of them. Nothing more than usual; yes he was over almost every day which was more than any other summer since they had met, but she had known that he would be. He wanted to spend as much time with her as possible before he went back to Hogwarts leaving her here alone for the rest of her pregnancy.
"Uh-huh" said her mother in reply.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily chuckled.
"O nothing, darling, just that I was a teenager once and I know what it looks like when people your age are falling for one another."
At this Lily blushed in earnest now. If she were to be honest with herself her mother had a point. The way Lily and Severus interacted on a daily basis looked, to an outsider, more like a couple than just two best friends. Their physical contact, though not inappropriate went beyond friendly to almost intimate. Him tucking a strand of hair behind her ear almost subconsciously, her laying with her head in his lap as they read on a blanket outside under their favorite tree in the back yard, the way they seemed to gravitate toward one another without meaning to when they went for their evening walks, their bodies in nearly constant contact.
"Mum, we've just grown a whole lot closer over this whole situation." She knew she sounded like she was even trying to convince herself.
"Lily, sweetheart, anyone with eyes can see that he adores you. What are you so afraid of? I know you have feelings for the young man as well. You might be fooling yourself, but you are most definitely not fooling your father and I." Her mother revealed gently.
"It's just that, here, away from school, it's easy to be close. But back at Hogwarts we're apart of two different worlds mum, and I know that sounds very shallow, like I'm afraid of what my friends think; but that's not it. It's deeper than that mum. I can't really explain it." She replied.
"Ok Lil. All I know is he makes you happy. And I want you to be happy darling. Both your father and I do. And he treats you so wonderfully." She paused looking like she didn't know how to say the next part, "Do let him down easy. Don't break his heart or anything Lily. The poor boy has had enough heartbreak and disappointment from those pathetic excuse for parents he's got." Her mother said almost crying.
Lily nodded knowing that her mother was referring to Severus's abusive father and his neglectful mother. She had always known that his parents weren't exactly kind or caring, but she hadn't really know to what extent until this summer. Before, Severus had usually avoided talking about them and the little answers he gave had been evasive. This summer however had been quite different. As Sev spent more and more time with Lily and her parents, he became more comfortable opening up and sharing things about his family and home life.
She know knew for instance that his father was a raging alcoholic that had snapped his wife's wand when Severus was born and had started beating her shortly after. Severus had told her stories in which his mother oftentimes took a beating meant for him simply because he did something children often do such as accidentally spilling a glass of milk or running into the house excitedly and accidentally slamming the door. He said he had been horrified at the thought that his mother was being beaten on account of him. While his mother was not particularly warm or caring, held still loved her and he said he knew she loved him as well.
Lily was heartbroken to realize that her best friend had perhaps never really been a child or had a loving relationship with his parents. He always had to worry about what his actions might do to set off the abusive man his father was. Once he was old enough to understand that anything he did might warrant a slap in the face or a kick in the ribs for no good reason at all, he had learned to always be cautious and guarded in everything he did.
Perhaps that was why his disposition with just about everyone but her was so unpleasant. All he had ever known from anyone especially the two people who were supposed to protect and love him was neglect, abuse, and disregard.
All these things made Lily love him even more fiercely than before and it frightened her. She wanted to hold him and protect him from everyone. She wanted to be his shelter from the merciless taunting he received from the likes of Potter and his gang of sycophantic hyenas. She knew that oftentimes Sev brought their scorn upon himself, but she also knew that sometimes the bullying was unwarranted.
The doorbell interrupted her thoughts and she said "I'll get it mum." And went to answer the door.
When she answered she was shocked and equally irritated to find none other than James Potter himself on her doorstep looking every bit the arrogant toerag he was.
"What are you doing here?" She said perhaps a little more hostile that she would have had she not just been thinking about him and his creep friends torturing her best mate.
His eyebrows shot up in surprise at the hostility in her voice and also at the obvious swell of her belly under her snug blouse.
She blushed rather reluctantly.
"Sorry Evans, I didn't mean to surprise you." He said as if to placate her. "I just happened to be in the neighborhood and thought I might swing by for a chat."
What was he playing at? Swing by for a chat?
"How did you find out where I live?" She demanded.
"I have my ways." He said his smug smile sliding back into place irritatingly. "Aren't you going to invite me in?" He asked expectantly.
"I hadn't planned on it." She retorted though not with the venom her voice had previously possessed.
"Lily! Who is it?" Her mother's voice called from the kitchen.
"Oh it's nobody important mum. Just some jackass." She called back.
"Ouch, that one hurt a bit." James said with a fake wounded look as Lily's mum came up behind her at the door.
"Hello, I'm Lily's mum. Who are you?" Her mother asked.
"Hello Mrs. Evans, it's so nice to meet you. My name is James Potter. I go to Hogwarts with Lily. We're good friends." He said holding his hand out to her mother and putting on that James Potter charm he was known for.
James:
Her mother was as beautiful as she was, with the same striking almond shaped emerald green eyes as her daughter. James was in his element. Mothers loved him. And this mother was smiling warmly, already taken by his charm
Lily rolled her eyes unimpressed by his show. "Hardly." She interjected.
Ignoring her daughter's rudeness Mrs. Evans said "Would you like to come in James?"
"Actually he was just saying how he had to leave right now. Weren't you just saying you had to leave right now Potter?" Lily asked him pointedly.
"Nonsense Evans," James replied condescendingly. "Sirius can wait a few minutes while we catch up and I get to know your gorgeous mother."
He followed Mrs. Evans through the house and into the kitchen where she started preparing tea and asking him about Hogwarts and his family. He could practically feel Lily seething beside him. It amused him that she reacted this way. He knew she wasn't too fond of him, but he hardly warranted this sort of response. He wondered what had put her in such a state seeing as how she seemed already irritated when she answered the door. He knew he had aggravated her already foul mood by turning the charm on for her mother and accepting the invitation to come inside the house, but his curiosity had been piqued and in all honesty, he really had come by just to say hi and see how her summer was going in hopes of perhaps sparking a friendship that went beyond their vague acquaintance at school.
To put it simply he wanted to get to know Lily Evans. He hadn't been able to get her off his mind for the better part of two years now and it was quite apparent he would never get the chance while they were at school, so he had taken a chance and decided to try and get to know her better this summer, before they returned to Hogwarts in the fall.
He had spent a good four days debating on whether or not he should owl her first or just show up. He had decided that just showing up might be a little more romantic and his feelings were slightly hurt when she opened the door and was so obviously incensed at his presence. But James would not be deterred so easily. He enjoyed a challenge.
"Well I'll let you two kids catch up. I have some errands to get to anyways. It was nice to meet you young man." Mrs. Evans said.
"It was a pleasure to meet you as well Mrs. Evans." He replied gentlemanly.
"What are you playing at? We're not friends. We can hardly stand each other." Lily said eyeing him shrewdly.
"Come on now, I wouldn't say that. And besides, I would like to be friends." He replied.
"Seriously though what are you doing here?" She asked.
"I just came by to say hi and see how you're doing and, I dunno, ask if you would perhaps care to join me for dinner or something." He paused eyeing her belly again and let his eyes wander back up to her brilliant emerald ones "But something tells me that perhaps you're not interested going out on a date with me. Is it anyone I know?" He asked.
"That's none of your business Potter. And if you really wanted to know how I was, you could have sent me an owl." She said quickly.
"Yeah, well I thought it might be more romantic if I just showed up." He admitted before he stop himself.
He thought he saw her features soften at his revelation.
"I guess you're already romantically involved with someone else though huh?" He continued.
"No not really." She said quietly avoiding the surprised look in his eyes. "I'm not a whore or anything I know who the father is." She added quickly
"I didn't think you were" he said.
"I don't want anyone to know. I'm not going back to Hogwarts till after the Christmas Holidays. Professor McGonagall and Professor Dumbledore are putting out that I'm doing a home study course for the term because I'm going to be visiting family in America." She revealed.
"I promise I won't tell a soul." He replied.
"Not even your pack of hyenas?" She said warningly.
"I promise." He said meaning it. If Lily Evans was going to trust him, he wasn't going to blow it.
"Thank you." She said humbly.
"Do you mind if I ask what happened? If you aren't telling anyone you've got to be dying for someone to talk to." He said hoping she would take the bait and open up to him a little bit.
She rolled her eyes in a pretend irritated sort of way and he could help the tiny jolt in his stomach at the thought that she might be being flirtatious.
"I've obviously had to tell someone." She said with a smirk.
"Oh come on Evans, teachers and parents don't count. Oh I forgot, you're freakish Slytherin friend lives around here too. You've probably told him, but I'm telling you right now, he doesn't count either." He said teasingly.
At this her eyes flashed dangerously and he realized him mistake in an instant but before he could apologize for insulting her friend she was already on her feet furious.
"As a matter of fact Potter he does in fact matter. And if you've just come to insult my friend then you can just leave." She said advancing on him.
He held up his hands in surrender "Whoa, whoa I'm sorry." He said "Can we please start over?" He pleaded.
She gave an exasperated sigh, "Fine, but let's get out of here." She said. Grabbing his arm and turning him toward the entry way sending a jolt of pleasant electricity through his whole body at her touch.
"Where are we going?" He asked half amused.
"Out." She retorted shoving him toward the front door. She reached for a notepad and scribbled two notes. One for her mother which she left on the kitchen counter, and one on the front door which to his dismay read:
Sev,
I went out with some old friends. Be back later. Don't wait up for me. I'll call when I get home.
Lily
He felt a twinge of jealousy at her note to the greasy git. He knew that they were friends, but he didn't know they were that close. He fought the notion that Snivellus was the father of Lily's baby as he followed her down the sidewalk.
"Where exactly are we going?" He asked again.
"I already told you Potter, out. You said you wanted to buy me dinner or something, right? Well here's your chance." She replied over her shoulder.
He smiled to himself. This was going to be interesting.
Sev:
Severus wasn't completely confused as to Lucius's reasons for seeking him out. He had received an owl from him just the day before saying that he might be in town and would like to speak with Severus about something. What that something was Severus could only guess. He had corresponded with Lucius on occasion since he had left Hogwarts and Lucius was always praising Severus for his accomplishments in Potions and The Dark Arts. Lucius had hinted more than once that The Lord He served had shown interest in Severus whenever he brought him up. This made Severus curious as to why Lucius would bother bringing him up to his Dark Lord. There had been rumors over the years of Voldemort and his gathering army of followers. He knew of their plans to oppress Half-bloods and Muggle borns and while Severus appreciated having a good word put in for him if this new dark regime was rising in power, he was Slytherin enough to know that Lucius Malfoy most likely had ulterior motives.
As they walked Lucius spoke, "Your muggle father told me where I could find you." Severus didn't answer. "I hadn't expected you to be with that mudblood." Severus's blood boiled at the word but he bit his tongue allowing Lucius to continue, "I had thought you would have given up your fascination with her by now. It seems I was wrong." He paused turning to face Severus "Would you please accompany me to my home so that we may continue this discussion in private?" He asked holding out his arm.
"Certainly." Answered Severus; taking the proffered arm, and feeling the tug of side-along apparition behind his navel.
His feet slammed into the earth in front of an elaborate wrought- iron gate that guarded a large handsome manor-like house. "Welcome to Malfoy Manor." Lucius said smugly unwarding the gate and allowing Severus to pass through in front of him into the verdant grounds full of elegant gardens and sculptures.
As they settled into the drawing room Lucius called a house elf to bring them refreshments. The elf was back in a matter of seconds offering a variety of snacks. Severus took only a glass of iced water and looked up at Lucius expectantly.
"I'll get right down to it Severus, my Master requires your assistance in a matter that is most important to him." He said nonchalantly.
"I'm sorry, but I don't remember swearing an oath to your master." Severus retorted.
If Lucius was surprised by Severus's reply he hid it well, his face a mask of cool indifference.
"Now Severus, I have been telling you for months that The Dark Lord has become interested in you and your accomplishments. It would be unwise to refuse him." He said warningly.
"And what about my half-blood status? What does your master think of that Lucius?"
"I have been able to convince The Dark Lord that despite your inferior birth, you would be a most valuable asset ." Lucius replied calmly. "Think of it this way Severus, if you join us, you might be able to protect your little mudblood friend when The Dark Lord takes over." He added smoothly.
Something in Severus's gut dropped. He hadn't thought of it that way before. The fact that witches and wizards like himself and Lily would quite possibly be oppressed, even endangered with the rise of The Dark Lord had previously seemed like a far off notion. Like it could never happen to them and he felt a slow panic rise within as he realized he had been wrong. He had to admit to himself that he had wondered what it would be like to join The Death Eaters, when he was younger and Lucius was a constant presence at Hogwarts filling his head with Dark Propaganda. But when Lucius had left Hogwarts, it was almost as if a glamour had been removed and all Severus was able to see was Lily, and how would quite probably lose her if he got caught up in this whole mess. He had put it behind him, only agreeing with the other Slytherins he associated with as a feeble attempt to fit into his role within his house. He was of course still fascinated with The Dark Arts themselves, but this whole notion of a dark and dangerous wizard rising up to oppress and rule with only malevolent intentions was not something he wished to be a part of. And yet now, the way Lucius had put it, he felt like he had no other choice. It was either join these people and perhaps have a chance to protect Lily, or refuse them and become a target as well.
"I don't quite understand Lucius, certainly The Dark lord has other more experienced servants who would be willing to assist him in whatever this is." Severus said cautiously.
"He does. But he is willing to give you a chance my young friend. If I were you, I would take this most generous offer." Lucius replied.
Severus deliberated internally for only a moment more before finally deciding. "All right fine, what is it that The Dark Lord requires?" Severus replied grudgingly. Somewhere in the back of his consciousness he knew that he was going to regret this. Lily would never understand.
Lucius gave him a triumphant smile and said "He will I'm sure tell you himself at the next meeting, which I believe will be held within a week'sg time here in my home." He looked proud and Severus was careful not to show any displeasure nor surprise in his face at this news.
"And at this meeting what exactly is going to be required of me Lucius?" Severus asked trying his best to make the question sound casual.
"I doubt you will be made to take The Mark, if that is what you are asking Severus. You are still underage and I believe The Dark Lord only wishes to meet you himself and speak to you about the matter at hand." Lucius replied.
"Very well." Severus relented.
"Excellent," Lucius answered rising and heading toward the doors beckoning Severus to follow, "I will owl you with more information about the time and place of the meeting in a few days time. The Dark Lord will be most please to hear that you have agreed to aid him." Lucius continued as they made their way through the grounds and to the elaborate wrought-iron gate once again. When the wards were down and they exited Lucius once again offered his arm and Severus took it bracing himself for the of his stomach as they disapparated.
When the world righted itself again he realized they were standing in the exact spot from which they had departed only an hour before.
"Now, I must take my leave of you Severus, I have a previous engagement I need to attend." He said with a slight bow of his head.
"Good bye Lucius." Severus replied returning the gesture as Lucius disapparated from in front of him.
As Severus turned his mind reeled with the implications of the serious predicament he now found himself in. How had he let this happen? How long could he keep it from Lily? How much influence would he actually have with the Death Eaters and Voldemort should he be able to please the dangerous wizard? Would it be enough to save Lily?
He tried to fix his face into a calm front as he made his way back toward the Evans house. He hoped Lily that this one time Lily wouldn't be able to see through his mask like she usually did.
As he approached her door however he noticed that the car wasn't in the driveway and there was a not on the door.
He read it and felt terribly disappointed. He was going to have to go home and hope his father didn't notice him until he passed out in a drunken stupor. Maybe his mother would feel up to letting him read to her today. Maybe he could make her smile. He sighed discontentedly as he headed toward home wishing it didn't hurt as much as it did that Lily had chosen company other than his own.
OK so now that I've thrown a curveball, what do you guys think? Seriously I would appreciate some reviews. Thank you so much =)