A/N: So yeah, I just couldn't leave you without a finishing piece. You guys deserve a closure, as does this story. (grins)
First off, MASSIVE thank yous for those amazing reviews for the previous chapter! (GLOMPS) You seriously helped me with molding together this final bit. So thank you! (hugs again)
Awkay… (takes a deep breath) Beginnins and ending are always the bits of any fic I'm the most nervous about, so I'll get this kicked out in the open before I change my mind. I REALLY hope you'll find this a worthy closing piece!
'We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.'
(Kenji Miyazawa)
Postlude
Two Years Later
That quite early morning there was coldness in the air that shouldn't have been there so long before winter. Derek shivered and pulled his jacket tighter around himself while making his way out of the jet to see Burlington International Airport in Vermont. Shivers crossed his body as he began to realize that today might finally be the end of a hellish chase that'd continued for over two years. Now, finally, they had what appeared to be solid trails towards Waylon Leeds. But for some reason the monster who claimed the life of his best friend wasn't the only thing bugging his head.
DeAnna… She was angry with him when he left – she always was when he explained that he had a new case, but this time had been different. He wished, from the bottom of his heart, that she would've been so old that he could've tried to explain, that he would've been able to tell her that he was desperately trying to make sure her parents hadn't died for nothing. That sometimes adults have to face the worst of monsters to make sure those they love are safe.
"Try to push her out of your mind for a while and focus on the case. Otherwise you won't be able to function." It wasn't until Aaron spoke he noticed that the man was stood directly beside him with a firm, tight expression. "Trust me, she'll be fine."
His muscles relaxed ever so slightly. "Are you like this with Jack?" he inquired without giving it much of a thought.
Hard as he tried he couldn't name the look on the unit chief's face. "Worse."
Derek relaxed a bit further, even came close to smiling.
Playing the role of a spare-daddy… Well, it hadn't come out naturally for him. But he hadn't been forced to do it all alone, anyway. The entire team had been there, right by his side.
From the beginning Penelope had taken it as her duty to babysit DeAnna whenever they were on a case. It was easy, anyway – DeAnna had always been a easy, quiet child. It was still a miracle to Derek that Erin Strauss had given no objections.
David most definitely wasn't a natural born babysitter, but the man tried the best he could. Derek remembered several occasions all the way from the times when DeAnna was just a baby when she was on David's lap, listening intently when the man told her stories in a soft, quiet voice. He never used that tone with anyone else.
Aaron, on the other hand, had a lot of experience from the role of a dad in beforehand. He'd offered valuable help, in more ways than one. With DeAnna Derek had been baffled to see a side of the unit chief he could've never imagined existed.
It'd taken Emily a while to figure out what to do with a tiny child, but she was a fast learner and DeAnna was a good teacher. Their relationship wasn't very vocal, but that didn't make it any less significant – actions spoke far louder. With Emily DeAnna read her first few sentences. It was Emily who taught DeAnna to play poker when the girl had just turned two. DeAnna never looked as much like her daddy as she did with a deck of cards in her hands.
And JJ… She was a fantastic substitute to the mommy that couldn't be present in DeAnna's life, and the girl helped the blonde cope with what had been stolen from her. JJ looked after the girl as often as she could, and Henry proudly called DeAnna his spare-sister.
Their family wasn't intact anymore, but at very least they hadn't been torn apart. They'd faced the horrible past two years together, picked up the pieces one by one and endured. Now they'd also bring it all to an end together.
Derek's thoughts tangled he saw the person waiting for them. He shivered a little.
William Reid was stood only a slight distance away, wearing a expression that seemed much tighter than Aaron's. There were shadows in the man's eyes he didn't remember seeing ever before. "I just got a confirmation from my team. Waylon's in the presumed location. We have to strike fast."
Derek nodded stiffly, feeling another shiver. They'd end this, now or never.
While sitting in the car that'd take the team to Waylon's location William took his time and examined what was his son's second family.
Aaron's eyes swept over them all, evaluating and musing. William understood why – Aaron was strong, but he didn't think the man would've been able to handle losing another member of his team. Beside the unit chief David sat as still and silent as a statue, only his chest and eyes giving signs of life. The man's both fists were balled so tightly that his knuckles had turned white. William's eyes then shifted towards JJ as she placed a lock of blonde hair behind her ear and bit her lower lip the same way Spencer did sometimes. William knew how important his son was to her, but it still startled him slightly to see that fire and venom in her eyes. Derek and Emily, on the other hand… He'd never felt so much anger in anyone, and he couldn't help wondering how, exactly, the two were planning on ending this.
He'd fought with Strauss for the longest time before she'd given him the permission to include this particular BAU-team to the operation of catching Waylon. He hoped from the bottom of his heart that he hadn't made a huge mistake. Deep in his heart he knew he hadn't.
Just like he knew that there was a reason why he never did what would've been necessary to prove that he was DeAnna's grandfather and thus her legal guardian, why he let this team raise his granddaughter instead. One bitter mistake was enough. He was done disappointing Spencer.
Plus it was their profile that helped them trace Waylon to Vermont, three months after he started killing again. They deserved the chance to finish this.
He focused on JJ once more, deciding that it was finally time to focus on the present. "I assume you briefed them on what I told you over the phone."
She nodded, her eyes far more serious than he'd ever seen them. "It's a old butcher house right outside the city." It was easy to tell that she felt sick to her stomach, and he realized that it wasn't just because of Waylon. He wondered when she'd tell the team that she was pregnant again. "He… likes to storage the victims there."
William nodded, his muscles tightening. Aaron, however, beat him to speaking. "He may not be expecting us, but he loves traps. Have to advised your team to be cautious?"
"I have", William assured, feeling chills upon realizing that they were less than minutes from their location. He grit his teeth, giving the entire team a long glance. "Good luck, all of you. Now let's finish this."
The team didn't need to be told twice. The car pulled to a stop, and with looks that spoke much louder than words the they abandoned the vehicle. Once outside they met William's own team of five. Rapid hand signals from him and Aaron told both units what they were supposed to do, and they split up to enter the eerie, huge building before them from varying angles.
Before they parted ways William noticed that Derek opened a cell phone connection before following Aaron and Emily. He wouldn't have asked who was on the other end even if he'd been given the chance – he could practically imagine the look on Penelope's face as she sat in her lonely office, unable to do anything but wait.
It took all William had not to cough as he walked through the long, dark hallways. The stench was absolutely horrible, and the dust hanging all over the place only made it worse. Despite the lack of light he saw the blood splattered practically everywhere. He didn't even want to know what secrets and horrors the house's walls were guarding.
His team of three secured altogether five rooms, only to find them just about empty. All they ran into was some more blood, along with sheets of paper that had hasty handwriting written all over them.
He already took a hold of his earpiece, ready to announce the base that they'd hit a dead end, until the commotion began.
First came the shouts, then gunshots, soon followed by screams. By the time the third gunshot rang out, soon followed by the fourth and last one, William was already running.
He made it to the main part of the building, and froze.
In the huge hall six women were hanging from hooks, their frost covered faces twisted into everlasting looks of sheer horror. But his attention was entirely elsewhere. For on the floor two more bodies lay.
Aaron and Derek were hovering above Emily who lay on the floor, her eyes closed and her face dangerously pale. There was some blood below her nose and what looked like the beginning of a bruise on her chin. The worst bit was, however, the hole on her jacket, almost directly where her kevlar vest ended.
William swallowed, feeling sick to his stomach.
And then Emily began to move, hissing loudly.
Derek was momentarily too stunned to react, but Aaron was quick to push the woman back down. "Hold still, alright? Waylon got you before we had the chance to see it coming. You most likely have a concussion and some bruises."
William's head spun slightly. He saw that hole, gaping mercilessly back at him. How could she possibly be…?
Just then Emily's hand moved, taking something from directly where the bullet had hit. Most of the damage had been caught by her vest, but the remaining pieces of a bullet… They'd slammed to what looked like a piece of some strange puzzle. It'd been hanging around her neck from a black leather ribbon. William was almost sure he heard her whisper "Reid's star…".
From the look in Aaron's eyes he could tell the unit chief understood something he didn't while the man nodded slowly, a foreign look in his eyes.
While Derek took a hold of the device placed by his right ear and spoke something – to Penelope, most likely –, Emily lost her battle against the dark and Aaron made a call for paramedics, William's gaze strayed towards the other body on the floor.
Waylon Leeds appeared decades older than in the pictures he'd seen. The man's eyes were closed as he lay there unmoving but still breathing, covered in his own blood. He could distinguish three gunshot wounds on the monster's torso. He didn't know who'd taken the shots and honestly, he didn't even care. He only hoped they were enough to keep Waylon down forever.
Enough to make sure that this nightmare was over for good.
(None of them noticed how not all that far away JJ put down her gun, her blue eyes hard as steel.)
Sometimes Penelope really, truly hated her part as the one on the sidelines. That day was most definitely one of them.
Hearing the shouts, gunshots, the kicks and punches… She couldn't remember many times when she would've been as terrified. Emily's hisses of pain didn't make it any easier.
But then, just as she was about to lose it, Derek's voice spoke. "Everything… Everything's okay, baby girl. Everything's okay. Waylon… He's been shot three times. It's over."
As soon as those words had been spoken Penelope felt tears filling her eyes. She didn't manage to blink them away when the room's door opened all of a sudden, followed by DeAnna's voice. "Aunt Penny?" The girl seemed slightly startled. "Why are you crying?"
Penelope opened her mouth, only to realize that there was no way she would've been able to produce speech. Instead she gave a feeble, somewhat watery smile and gestured the little girl to come closer. DeAnna didn't have to be told twice. Still unable to speak, Penelope wrapped her arms tightly around the girl and held on with all her might.
It was finally over. It was really, truly over.
Penelope liked to think that she didn't imagine the touch she could've sworn she felt on her shoulder.
In a hospital's waiting room JJ opened her eyes at the scent of coffee to find a takeaway mug held out for her.
David appeared exhausted, but somehow it looked like some weight had disappeared from his shoulders. "I had a feeling you could use one of these."
She found herself smiling as she accepted the offering and took a long, grateful sip. "Thanks." She then glanced towards the direction of the room's door. Where was Aaron? Had she fallen asleep? "Any news?"
David nodded. "Prentiss is fine, just a bit banged up. Aaron's there to see her."
JJ nodded once more, then glanced towards her hands. They were still shaking under a storm of slowly fading adrenaline. "It's… really over now, isn't it?" she whispered, feeling utterly spent all of a sudden. It had to be.
It was David's turn to nod. "Yeah. It is."
JJ shuddered. And then it all came flooding out.
She'd spent a month in a psychiatric ward. Even now she had regular meetings with a psychiatrist, and most nights she still needed medication to rest. But she'd honestly thought she'd just about gotten better. That was until tonight.
Because now, with the tears that appeared to her cheeks one by one, she realized that she was truly healing.
When she called Will an hour later to tell him the news he asked her if she was alright. Finally she could be fully honest when she said "Yes".
Emily's whole body hurt when she woke up. It took a long moment before she recognized the dark space around her as a hospital room.
She groaned, rubbing her face with both hands. "Oh crap…"
She was mildly startled upon hearing movement until Aaron spoke. "According to the doctor you don't have any broken bones, but you have a lot of bruises and a concussion. They want to keep you here overnight for observation."
She frowned in objection, finally facing him. "No. I'm not staying here."
The look Aaron sent her way cut wings from any possible objections. "He could've killed you. If that final shot had been fired just a little bit later, the team would've lost another member. So no. We're not taking chances."
Emily nodded, a million thoughts and tangled feelings spinning through her head. And suddenly she understood that this was the moment of truth she'd been waiting for for a very long time.
Spencer… He'd saved her, this time. He hadn't been able to pull her away from from the crushing kick that threw her to the ground, or the second and last strike, but he had shielded her from the bullet. Now, as she took in the look on Aaron's face, she realized that she couldn't be arrogant enough to expect her luck to last forever – to expect that Spencer would be able to save her again. No matter how much she hated it she needed help or she could very well be stolen from the team as well.
If she'd learned anything from Spencer, it was that keeping secrets could be dangerous – for the entire team. She couldn't repeat his mistake. And that's why she spoke in a quiet, serious tone. "Hotch." She continued when his eyes found hers. "I know that this is a bad time, but… I really need to tell you something. I should've a long time ago." She swallowed, tasting blood for some reason, and looked away. "It's about a man named Ian Doyle."
That night was sleepless for the entire team as they waited for news on Waylon. According to his doctor the man was heavily unconscious and in a critical condition. The odds were against him, but anything was still possible.
The following morning Derek's steps were somewhat heavy as he walked through the eerily quiet cemetery, knowing the path to his location all too well.
He really needed to do this. He'd known it since he stepped out of the jet. His best friend deserved this.
It was, however, hard to remember that as his steps paused right in front of Spencer's grave.
It still stung like hell to see the younger man's name on the stone.
Derek swallowed thickly, and hesitated for the longest time before finally speaking. "I'm sorry, that it took me so long to come and see you. But… I guess I wanted to wait until I have news for you. Now I do." He grit his teeth. "We finally found Waylon. We made him pay for what he did to you, Neah and all those other people. It's… It's finally over, now."
There was no response. Not that he would've expected such, but it still hurt.
Derek was so deep in thought that he shuddered upon hearing Penelope's familiar voice. "See, Dina? There he is."
He turned just in time to see a worried expression on DeAnna's face. "You look sad", the little girl stated quietly.
To even his own surprise Derek managed to smile slightly. "Yeah, I'm fine." He nodded towards the grave although he would've much rather not seen it. "I just… I wanted to come and see your daddy."
DeAnna nodded, seeming to understand. The little girl then walked forward and sat before the grave like it'd been the most natural thing in the world. It wasn't until then Derek noticed the children's book in her small hands. "I can't read this properly yet, but aunt Penny said I'm getting better. She said you like books, so I wanted to read to you."
A gigantic blockage formed into Derek's throat as he watched the little girl read on, struggling with several words but fighting through nonetheless. At that moment he found himself missing Spencer more than he had in a long time.
Spencer would've been so proud of his daughter.
He shivered slightly when feeling a hand in his. Penelope's eyes didn't seem entirely dry as she squeezed his hand, giving him a look that said she understood. And suddenly it didn't hurt quite as much anymore.
They had no idea how long they'd been standing there until they heard steps from behind them. Peering over his shoulder Derek found David and JJ approaching. "We had a feeling you'd be here", JJ explained, trying to smile and failing. "Aaron's on the phone, he'll also be here in a second."
Derek nodded. "How's Prentiss?" he asked in a moment.
David gave a lopsided smirk. "Driving the hospital staff crazy. She wasn't happy about having to stay there."
For some reason Derek felt slightly warmer than before. It felt right to have pretty much the entire BAU-team gathering there to see Spencer now that the nightmare was over.
He opened his mouth but before he could say a thing DeAnna's voice cried out with clearly audible startle. "Look!"
In an instant every single one of them looked towards the direction to which the girl was pointing. Derek felt a shudder inside him.
There, pushing its way through the ground right next to Spencer's grave, was a single white rose that seemed to shine in the rays of a early morning.
DeAnna smiled radiantly. "It's daddy, isn't it?"
Derek nodded, and spoke although he felt so choked that it was nearly impossible. "Yeah, kid. It is."
In Paris the voices coming from a laptop were the only sounds in a hastily decorated, small apartment that – according to the name on the door – was inhabited by a woman named Felicia Laurel.
On the laptop's screen DeAnna smiled brightly and emitted sounds of delight while sprinting towards Aaron, never noticing the tiny camera fastened to the man's clothes that transmitted the footage.
Gosh… She'd grown up so much…!
"Uncle Aaron, uncle Aaron! Come! Daddy says 'hi'!"
As Aaron followed and DeAnna showed him the rose that'd appeared to the grave, babbling excitedly although the words tangled several times, the woman staring at the computer screen shuddered. A couple of tears slipped from Neah's now brown eyes, sliding down her cheek as she pushed a lock of strayed black hair behind her ear with a unsteady hand.
She knew that she couldn't be close to her daughter for both their safety. But that didn't make being away any easier. That didn't change the fact that she couldn't be in her daughter's life, watching the little girl grow up. That didn't change the fact that DeAnna was forced to grow up without either one of her parents.
The BAU-team was doing the best they could, though, she could tell. And somehow she had a feeling that Spencer was also watching over DeAnna. That was the hope she clung to.
She hoped, with her all, that Spencer could see their daughter, too. She really, truly wished he could've been there by her side keeping an eye on their little girl.
She reached out her hand and brushed the computer screen, hitting the exact spot the showed DeAnna's face. "I love you, sweetie. I love you very much", she whispered. "Don't ever doubt that, no matter how long I'm away."
Just then her cell phone started ringing, making her shudder again. She frowned upon noticing who the caller was. "Is something wrong?" He never called with good news.
"No, no. Actually… Actually, it's the opposite." William's tone made shivers go through her. The pause that followed was much too long. "I just got a call from the hospital. Waylon Leeds is dead."
'As long as I can I will look at this world for both of us. As long as I can I will laugh with the birds, I will sing with the flowers, I will pray to the stars, for both of us.'
(Sascha, as posted online)
'Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.'
(Mary Elizabeth Frye)
End.
A/N: Oh boy… (blinks owlishly, then wipes a tear) It's… truly over, isn't? I can't believe it's really over!
You guys, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for all those fantastic reviews with which you've pushed me forward when my head's been all over the place! And also thank yous for the listings – and heck, for reading this! (HUGS) Thank you! You're all FANTASTIC!
I've gotta get going now. It's almost dinner time. (licks lips hungrily) Once again, thank you! Who knows, maybe I'll c ya guys again later.
Peace, love and all that jazz!
Take care!