2: Memories Are Forever
Everything in life, at some point or another, becomes a memory; a grouping within the mind of all retained and learned information of events of the past, able to be retrieved at any moment for use. Some knowledge within the memory is harder to get at than others, as it is buried deep below other thoughts. Sometimes you block things out, hiding it within the darkest depths of memories. My old desire to kill Cassidy, and the dreams of it, are locked away within my mind, sealed by my thoughts and memories of Amanda.
Kyle looked at a picture on his desk, drawn in his signature style of rapid dotting on the page with different colors. This was a picture of Amanda, one that he had completed three days ago on Friday, after she had come to see him after he got back from clearing his head. It was of her as she was when she first came into his room that day; the light that helped to control the dark impulses.
My memories of Amanda have always been treasured and deeply cared for within my own mind, never to be lost, if I can help it. Amanda's coming to me the other day was an important memory that will always be carried with me. It will be the memory of the sealing away of Cassidy. If I can help it, I will never have to think about killing him again, except in recollection such as this. Simple recollection is blocked by Amanda's light as I think about her. Any time I would think about killing him, I'm certain, if I looked at Amanda or her picture, I would be fine.
But now I wonder something more. I wonder what Adam Baylin could have taught me had he lived on. Could he have taught me how to control my memory more perfectly? Perhaps teaching me how to keep certain memories blocked off forever? But then I could never learn from my mistakes of my dreams, if I did that. Memory is truly a tricky matter, as no matter how bad memories can be, they can always be of help and guidance at some point in life. But one thing is certain, the hardest, most emotionally powerful memories are the ones that never leave us.
[Break]
"You're late," Tom Foss said, putting something down on a table as he looked up, watching Declan walk through the empty facility that he used for Kyle's training. It was gray outside, but it wasn't supposed to rain, which was rather fortunate.
"I got here as soon as I could," Declan replied, about to say something else, before Tom cut him off.
"You're the one who wanted this meeting," Foss told him, "Don't waste my time, or I won't help you out."
"Ok, I'll do my best from this point on not to disappoint you," Declan told him.
"You really want this, don't you?" Foss questioned him, "Considering you're willing to act so submissive. I know you, Declan. This isn't like you."
"Well, I want to do whatever I can for Kyle. Right now I don't know where I fit in in his life! I mean, am I his friend? His brother in arms? Am I actually doing anything to help him as we are right now? But then…then I think of you, look at you. You seemed like such a bad guy, but then you turned out to be Kyle protector! I mean…we know where you fit in with his life. We know where you and Kyle stand. I want to know where Kyle and I stand. I want your help."
"To be his protector?" questioned Foss, "You want to work alongside me?"
Declan ignored him and walked towards him, reaching for the overturned object. Foss gripped his wrist and moved quickly, drawing his arm up behind Declan's back, twisting his arm, causing Declan to fall to his knees and shout out in pain.
"The hell are you doing?" Declan managed to shout, which prompted Foss to release him and take a quick step back.
"Don't touch that," Foss said, "First rule, if you're serious about this, is not to touch my things, unless I tell you."
"What is it? Looks like a picture frame," Declan said, rubbing his arm, muttering in pain as he swung his arm, trying to loosen it, make it hurt less.
"Like I said, you can't touch my things. There's a reason for that. I don't want you to know what it is. So, do the math. Why would I tell you what it is?" Foss demanded of him.
"Fine, fine," Declan said, "No need to twist my arm to get me to listen."
"If you want to become one of Kyle's protectors, then you need to understand pain," Foss told him, "Otherwise what good are you going to be to him?"
"Good point," Declan muttered, "So then, what are we going to do first to get me ready for this? I want all of the training you can give me."
"All of it? Are you absolutely sure you want to do this? It's incredibly hard work," Foss said, "And I'll probably make it harder on you, especially if you annoy me in any way. Even if we've worked together before, I won't take things easy on you."
"Wouldn't have it any other way," Declan said, "Let's do this. I want to have a proper place in Kyle's life, like you. I want to be able to help him, especially after he was attacked."
"Very well, then," Foss told him, "Let's get to work."
He cast one last sideward glance at the overturned picture frame, then walked off, directing Declan to follow him.
[Break]
"What's wrong, Josh?" Stephen asked, sitting next to Josh on the couch. Josh was playing G-Force, looking intently at the screen, but Stephen could see something wrong on Josh's face.
Josh didn't answer him. He just kept playing.
"Josh!" Stephen said sharply, but no response. He couldn't even tell if Josh had heard him. He got up, walked over to the wall, and pulled out the plug.
"Hey! What the hell was that for?" Josh shouted.
"Language," Stephen told him.
"Well why did you just go and unplug my game like that? How would you like it if I walked in on you while you were…I don't know… How would you like it if I walked in on you while you were working and just started unplugging your stuff?"
"I wouldn't," Stephen said.
"Then why…?"
"Because you weren't listening to me," Stephen said, looking at Josh's face. The outrage at what he did was mixed with the pain that he had seen on his son's face moments earlier, prompting him to ask, "Now, tell me, what's wrong?"
"You know what's wrong! You just unplugged…"
"No! I mean, what else is wrong?" Stephen asked, "You looked…upset, even while you were playing."
"Oh, so you come in and unplug my game just to ask me that? Wow, great job, dad," Josh told him.
"I will not take that attitude!" Stephen told him sharply, "Now, I may not be a psychologist like your mother, but I can still tell when things are wrong."
Josh finally let go of his controller, sighed, and looked at the floor. Stephen sat down next to him, "Now, what is it?"
"I miss Andy," he said, then directed vaguely at the blank television screen, "We were supposed to hook up online and play today, but…"
"She wasn't on?" he asked.
"Yeah. And I haven't been able to get in touch with her since the other day, when Declan helped me to talk to her in her car. She even gave me what her home phone was going to be, but there's no answer. I'm…"
"Worried?"
"No. I'm…kind of concerned that she's moved on. Maybe she's already met somebody and…"
"Josh," Stephen said reassuringly, hating to bring this up, but decided best against it, ignoring the thought for the moment and changing his words, "You two have a very special bond and connection. She likes you a lot. There's no way she could have found someone else. You're both crazy about each other, aren't you?"
"Yeah," Josh said, "Yeah, you're right. There's no way she could have found someone else, not after a few days, not after all we've shared. I mean I was her first…"
"That's enough," Stephen said, knowing the information, but he just didn't want to hear his son say it. That was the information he thought he might say, but decided against. At least his son had picked up on that. That may have been one of the big reasons she wouldn't have moved on, and he was happy that Josh had realized that.
He just didn't want to have to hear it said, and didn't want to have to think about it. But unfortunately, it was going to be forever ingrained in his memory, after he had first found out about it.
Stephen stood up from the couch, "Try calling her again. I'm sure that they have a lot of things to do, having just moved in. That's probably why you haven't reached her yet, or seen her on your game. Just…just give it a few days, Josh."
"I don't want to," Josh said, but actually didn't sound selfish when he said it.
"I know you don't. You really care about Andy, but don't worry. Things will work out soon. Trust me."
"Thanks," Josh said, standing up to go and plug his game back in.
"You have chores," Stephen said, "That's the reason I came in in the first place. Those first, then you can try to call Andy and play your game again."
"Come on! Can't you see I'm in pain here?" Josh said, trying to get out of it.
Stephen smiled, "Just do it," he picked up the newspaper from a chair, tossing it to Josh, "Then, when you're done, you can find a new job, if you want."
"I was just starting to enjoy being jobless, too!" Josh moaned.
"Yeah, well, don't get used to it," Stephen told him, walking out of the room.
[Break]
When Kyle was walking back into his room, he saw Jessi was there, sitting in his tub, just like when he first saw her in his room.
"Where have you been?" he questioned her, "I heard from Amanda that you spent time at her house, but that was only for one day. What about the other two?"
She gave a sharp smile, "I've been…around."
"You went back to Sarah's, didn't you?" he questioned her.
"Where else was I supposed to go? Come back here? To Brian Taylor's?" a smile came to her face again, "Maybe I should go there. He is a Latnok member, after all. I could settle some things…"
"Jessi, no," Kyle warned sternly.
"I was joking," she said flatly, "Anyway, yeah. I went to Sarah's and started going over all of the things we stole from Nate. I also started to print everything relevant on his computer, and backed it up elsewhere. I wiped it after that. No one can get it back now."
"What did you get off of his computer?" Kyle asked her.
She held out a stack of papers to him, "Take a look for yourself."
He took the sheets, glancing over, reading each one in about a second or two. He was finished in about two minutes, looking up at Jessi, "This information is about the cloned babies."
"It's not how to clone them, though," she said, "But…it's still a wealth of information."
"Disturbing information," Kyle said, "All about how they're planning on using the clones. Selling them, making them tools…"
He wondered about Jessi's words. She had said it was a wealth of information, while he had called it disturbing. It was disturbing. Granted, the actual cloning processes would be more so, most likely to even Jessi, but all of that information was locked in his mind, trapped deep within his memory where even he wouldn't go to retrieve it. When he had gotten everything from Zyzzx, he had gotten those formulas as well. He was the only source of it anymore.
"Latnok is only about money anymore. This makes it even more obvious," Kyle told her, "We have to stop them."
"We can't stop them if they have no plan," Jessi said reasonably, "This sale information is moot now."
"Jessi, did the computer have any more information on this stuff? Like who was going to buy the clones?"
"No," she replied, "Why?"
"Then we could try to stop them ahead of time," Kyle said, "We know Latnok is only about money now. They were playing god with this experiment, but they have other ventures. I wouldn't be surprised if someone buying a clone would buy other advancements from them. And if we knew where to start, we could get some sort of lead on Latnok."
"A lead on them? For what?" she questioned.
"We need to stop them, we know that. How can we stop them if we don't know where they are?"
"So, you want to go in and have me take care of them, or something?" she questioned, "Me and Foss? Or what's the plan? Firebomb the place?"
"No," Kyle said, "I'm hoping that when the time comes, we can use reason."
"Reason?" she demanded, "With Latnok? I doubt that."
"I'm not going to condone killing them, or violence," he told her.
As much as Jessi wanted to argue, she also wanted Kyle, and knew that he and Amanda probably weren't fully back together yet. They might still have some problems in their ways, so she still had a chance to get at him. She swallowed her pride and nodded, "Ok, fine."
But Kyle saw through it. He knew that Jessi was only saying that for his sake, and didn't want to take that approach. Regardless, he let her go without saying anything.
"You made the wrong choice, Kyle," said a voice behind him. A hauntingly familiar voice, "You should have let her do as she wanted, if you could find Latnok. I'll be the first to admit that most of them are beyond redemption."
He turned around, looking at the man standing beside the door. It was Adam Baylin.
[Break]
"Make the jump!" Tom Foss shouted to Declan.
Declan was using the rock climbing wall that Kyle had used in the past for the sake of attempting to train his powers and make what could be physically impossible jumps. Foss wanted Declan to make jumps in order to get physically stronger, to improve his muscles, his muscle contractions, his coordination, and his cardio. He was hooked up to a belay system, but still Declan didn't feel very safe doing this, especially with only Tom Foss holding him.
"Go!" Foss shouted to him.
Declan took a deep breath, made one more glance, and jumped up and to his right. The rock he was going for was a secluded rock jutting out as a singular handhold, with another handhold about two feet above it. He was to pull himself up and hold on with both after reaching the first. Only with both handholds could he walk his feet up, find some sort of footing, and continue up to finish it.
He had to jump about seven feet to the right and two up. If he shot his arm up fast enough, he would be able to just grab the rock. That's no doubt what he had to do. He wasn't sure how he could travel that far to his right and up at the same time without losing height and actually falling. So, as he jumped, having gone as high as possible during it – as there was nothing above him, so he couldn't climb higher first – he shot his arm out. The seven foot to the right jump had made him lose height, but he got his grip on the rock and hung there for a few moments, straining. Foss was shouting at him to move up and on, to finish, without any word of congratulations for making the first part.
Declan gritted his teeth and pulled up on his arm, shooting his left arm up, pulling up as high as his right would take him. When his fingers brushed the rock, he pulled himself as much higher as he could, but was already losing a lot of strength. He gripped the rock and pulled up with both arms now, his feet trying to find a spot to hold himself. He planted them on the wall, walking them up as he shot his right arm up to another rock, using the now empty rock as a spot for one foot. He began to climb straight up, the top within reach.
When he made it up and pulled himself on top, Foss shouted, "Now, hit the bull's-eye!"
"Bull's-eye?" he muttered in confusion, panting. He glanced down to see a handgun sitting there, and a target on the far wall. The wall wasn't too far away, but for someone not good with guns, this was going to be a problem, even at a distance of perhaps twenty five yards. He took up the gun, closed an eye, and did his best to aim.
"You're dead! You took too long!" Foss shouted, "Come down, reset, we'll try again!"
Declan lowered it, "What are you talking about?"
"You took too long! You were shot. Killed. Now come down and we're resetting! We're doing this until you get it right!"
"And how much is there to get right?" Declan demanded.
"When you climb and make the bull's-eyes within the time limit that starts after you get the gun, then we're done with this part." Foss told him, "Now get down here and we'll start again!"
"You're not married, are you?" Declan stated, "I can tell because I cant think of any type of woman who would put up with this! This is the fifth time doing this! I don't have the energy left!"
This was the fifth time, but only the first he had actually made the jump, so it was only the first time he knew he had to shoot as well. Even if he made it again, could he make the shots and clear this training? Or would he have to keep going until he had absolutely no energy left?
"We're done," Foss said with a deep edge of bitterness in his voice. He undid his belay ropes, "Get down yourself! I'm done!"
"What? What the hell's your problem?" Declan shouted after him, but Foss wasn't replying. Then Declan cursed. How was he going to get down without someone to belay him down?
[Break]
"Adam!" Kyle exclaimed, then recalled the last time this had happened. He had been asleep and had seen Adam as a figment of his own mind. His mind had taken on Adam Baylin's form for the sake of helping Kyle sort through problems in his mind from another point of view, the view that Kyle believed that Baylin would have on the subject.
"You know I'm not," Adam told him, "But I mean what I said. Jessi should have been allowed to do as she wishes to."
"But that means the deaths of so many people! The entirety of Latnok she would want to hunt down!" Kyle exclaimed.
"Kyle?" he heard Nicole's voice.
Kyle realized that, unlike last time, he was awake. He wasn't sleeping, or in a sleep-like state this time. He shouted, "I'm ok! I'm…I'm just talking to myself!"
"Nice," Adam told him.
"Why should she be allowed to kill so many people when we can reach the same conclusion without the deaths?" Kyle questioned of Adam.
"Because Latnok won't stop until they get what they want. You know that. And how can you stop people who are that dedicated to the cause? You can only kill them."
"But deciding to kill someone is essentially an act of playing god. Latnok is playing god with their clone attempts. Why should one action of playing god be replaced with a second? Surely one is enough, and stopping the first through other means is enough!"
"Sure. It could be. But how can you stop others from trying again in the future? It's best to make an example out of Latnok. Out of a society borne of Einstein. If his passed down ideals were shown in such a harsh light that led to murder, would another really make an attempt at playing god like that?"
"But it's not right! If we can stop them another way, the same result is made! Or maybe Latnok could be reformed!"
"By who? You?" Adam questioned, nodding, "If you really want to see it reformed, only you can do it, Kyle. It's your family business, after all."
"I don't want to reform Latnok. Not by my own hands. I don't want to get involved with them in any capacity," Kyle told him, "You know that."
"I do know that," Adam replied, "But it's not on my mind. After all, I'm expressing completely different points of views that you have locked in your own mind that you're unwilling to compromise with. The parts you are willing to think about, to act upon, aren't very relevant to me. They aren't in my mind. If you can call it that."
"I'll remember that," Kyle told him, "So, tell me. Do you think I should have killed Cassidy?" As soon as the words left his mouth, thoughts of Amanda came up, in an attempt to keep the darkness of those thoughts at bay.
"Yes."
A simple one word answer. That's all this figure of Adam Baylin had to give Kyle. No explanation, just a simple answer.
"Why?"
"Why not?" questioned Adam back.
"You're my mind. Give me a reason I should have killed Cassidy," Kyle said, "I want to know why I should have!"
Adam Baylin's image smiled, "Like you said, I'm your mind. I don't have an answer, because you don't either, outside of the obvious."
"What do you consider to be 'the obvious'?" questioned Kyle.
"That you want to protect your loved ones. That's the only justification that you have in your entire mind," Baylin shrugged, "But I guess that that's enough, isn't it, Kyle? All that matters is protecting those close to you."
"As you tried to help and protect Sarah," Kyle said.
"As Adam Baylin tried," the image of Adam corrected, "But yes."
"But would the people I love still accept me if I had become a murderer?" questioned Kyle.
"Did you accept Jessi, even after learning she was a murderer?" questioned Baylin back.
"I did."
"Your family loves you more than you care about Jessi or her wellbeing. That's the reality of the situation. Yes; they would have accepted you and your decision had you killed Cassidy. But you didn't need me to tell you that, Kyle."
"You're right," Kyle said, "Do you have any other words to impart on me?"
Baylin's image was suddenly gone. Kyle looked around, but he was nowhere to be seen. There was nothing else for Kyle's mind to get across to Kyle.
The last time I saw Adam Baylin was after he recovered and told us about Sarah. I always expected him to be here to help guide me through life when I needed him, but his death brought that idea to an end. But he still persists in my mind, as a figment that my own mind wishes to take on.
My memories of my birth father are too strong for me to let go. I'll even let this specter of him say everything I'm against, just so I can see him. He's the one person who Cassidy could never get at…because he only lives in my memories, now.
[Break]
"Lori! Wait up!"
Lori looked back, watching as Mark ran across the UW lawn towards her. She turned to face him fully, "I was wondering if I might have been too early. Almost left to come back later. Good thing you caught me now."
"Yeah, it is," Mark told her, "Look…"
"I know you're involved with Latnok. And I know Cassidy is your boss. So let me ask you this; did you know that he showed up at our house and tried to kill Kyle?"
"What?" Mark exclaimed in shock, "When did this happen?"
"About four nights ago. Thursday night," she told him.
"Thursday…that's when…," Mark started, shaking his head and quieting up before he said too much.
"What about Thursday?" questioned Lori, "Mark!"
"Well…you're not going to like it," he told her.
"Oh, really? Try me," she said.
"I met Kyle at a lab," Mark said, "I have to guess this was right before he…met Cassidy. I didn't know anything about this. I was checking up on the…"
"Cloned babies?" Lori asked.
He nodded, "So you know about that stuff, huh?"
"Yeah, we do," Lori replied, "So, what were you doing there?"
"Just checking up on them. I didn't entirely know what was going on. Kyle was there, sabotaging it all. I helped him after he explained things to me, and then went home. I actually haven't seen Cassidy since. I didn't think I could face him after what I did to the project. But…he actually tried to kill Kyle? Why?"
"I don't know," Lori replied, "Probably because Kyle wouldn't join with Latnok. Kyle almost killed him in the process, but he didn't." She omitted the fact that Kyle was Cassidy's brother. It wasn't something Mark needed to know.
"Cassidy doesn't strike me as the type," he told her.
"Yeah, well, look at our house and tell me otherwise," she said.
"Lori…if you came here to break up with me for my involvement…"
"Oh, god no!" she said, "I'm not going to break up with you! Look, as far as I can tell, you're too good a guy to go along with all of these things Cassidy's done, or doing. I'm sure you didn't know what was all going on. Right?"
"That's right," he replied, "I wouldn't lie to you."
"You'd better not," she said, giving him a smile, "So, that's all there is. We're still where we were, but now we both know more."
"You said that Cassidy tried to kill Kyle…how is he?"
"He won," she told him, "He was beat up when we found him, but he's fine. Just some emotional damage that still seems to be persisting. I think he's getting over that. If anyone can help him with it, it's Amanda, and they've been seeing each other more recently, at least."
"That's good," Mark said, "I'd hate to think that the group I'm involved with would have done anything lasting to Kyle like that. He's a great guy."
"Yeah. Mark…you should talk to Kyle sometime. Maybe you should get out of Latnok, before it's too late."
"Too late?" he questioned, "Is that some sort of warning of incoming danger?"
"I don't think so," Lori told him, "I don't think Kyle would do anything like that. But," she almost said Jessi's name to say she was alive, and say that she would do something, but instead went with, "But he has people who would do almost anything for him. For his will, or just to help or protect him in general. So you might jut want to be careful, and see Kyle, for your own protection."
"Y-yeah, I will," Mark assured her.
They kissed fairly awkwardly, and Lori headed off. Mark watched her go, and turned around, heading back towards the building he had just left, when he saw Nate standing in the doorway, waiting for him.
"Nice girlfriend," Nate commented.
"Shut up," Mark told him, trying to get past, but he couldn't, "Move!"
"Can't do that," Nate said.
"Why not?"
"Cassidy told me to get you, so that's what I'm doing."
"And what is that suppo…"
He stopped talking as Nate hit him with the electrical weapon, blasting him at pointblank, ramming the end into his chest where nobody would see it. There was some electricity crackling around Mark's body, but nobody was close enough to see it very well. Nobody noticed as Mark collapsed into Nate's awaiting arms and was dragged inside by Nate.
[Break]
"You didn't leave?" Foss demanded as Declan came into view.
"No. And I'm not going to. Look, I'm sorry for whatever it is I said to you, but I'm serious about this! I'm going to do whatever I can to help Kyle, and whether you help me or not is up to you! But if you want him protected as best as can be done, then you had better be the one to train me," Declan told him.
Tom Foss was looking at the picture frame, and looked to Declan. He set it down, this time with the picture up.
"It's ok. Go ahead and look," Foss told him softly.
Declan moved around the table, looking down. A woman and a young girl. Declan looked to Foss, "Who are they?"
"Erika and Sarah Foss," he said, "My wife and daughter."
"I didn't know you had a family," Declan told him, "Look, sorry about my comment earlier. I can imagine how that got at you."
"What got at me is that you don't know anything," he told Declan.
"What do you mean by that?" Declan demanded.
Foss remained silent for a good minute before finally talking, "My family is dead. I'm the only one left."
"What? How did this happen? Were they targeted by Latnok? Zyzzx? Madacorp?"
"No," he said, "They…they died in a car accident, years ago."
"Why are you telling me this?" Declan asked him, looking into Foss's eyes, seeing the pain, seeing the tears he was fighting back, "It's so hard on you, so why?"
"Because things in life are hard. That's why. You're doing this training despite how hard it is, aren't you?"
"Well, yeah…"
"If something in life is difficult, then the reward should be great, isn't that right? Well, it doesn't work like that all the time. Sometimes, but not all the time. They were killed by a drunk driver, Declan. And I only tell you this because I'm sure that you can be a great protector and guardian for Kyle.
"I was that drunk driver. I…I killed my own family on accident. What I'm doing here is part of my repentance for doing such a thing. For taking two beautiful and innocent lives from this world. I don't want to pass my burden onto you. I don't want my job to be easier by having someone like you doing what I do. You don't have anything to make up for, unlike me. Declan, you really have no reason to do this, unlike me. But thank you. Not for me, not for my family, but for the sake of Kyle."
"You really trust me, don't you?" he asked Foss, who was holding back his tears, keeping his voice strong, not letting it waver.
"I do. That's why I've told you everything. They live only in my memories now. Memories I can never allow to be disgraced. So never say anything again like you said earlier. And if you would, never bring anything I have just told you up again. I want to keep my personal and professional lives separated."
"But they are connected to each other," Declan said.
"Not in a way that truly matters," Foss replied, "My private life led to my professional, but that's it. Please, never bring it up."
Declan nodded, "Yeah, no problem," he put his hand on Foss's shoulder, "I'm going to make you very proud, Tom. I'm going to pass everything you throw at me. I'm going to become a great guardian for Kyle, and I'll be sure to do you proud."
"That's what I hope for," Foss told him.
"But I'll only give it my all if you can do something for me," Declan said.
"What's that?" Foss questioned warily.
"I can't make you stop blaming yourself, but…you should move on with your life. You really should. It's been years since they died, hasn't it? Based on how long I've known about you, that's a pretty good guess. At least five years, right? Just please…do me a favor. Do your wife and daughter a favor. Move ahead with your life, and leave me to do your job."
"I have a penance to complete. I have Kyle to protect!" Foss snapped at him for even suggesting the idea of retiring from this job.
"I understand, but please, for the sakes of your family, let me take over for you. Let me not only take over protecting Kyle, but also your penance. Two lives are better than one, right? What you started, I will finish."
"I don't know," Foss told him.
"Look. You listen to Kyle, right? Well, I'm just taking a shot in the dark, but I dare you to tell me he wouldn't want you to move on with your life. This is what he would want. For Kyle, for me, and most importantly, for your family…take this into consideration. Please."
[Break]
Kyle sat alone in his room, sitting in his tub. With the problems in his life currently, from Latnok to his paternity, his mind drifted to Amanda. She had wanted to be with him again, and he had gladly accepted. Things were right, so why was he thinking about this, now?
Because, as much as he wanted to be with her, he knew that they would have problems. The main problem would come from the fact that Latnok was apparently proactively after him, or at least Cassidy was. And Cassidy had the UW Latnok students. If he could spur some of them into action – and Nate was already enraged, no doubt – then there would be a problem.
So could he and Amanda completely fix things? If they could completely move past these threats, if he could find a way to protect her, then he could be with her.
There was a knock, and Amanda poked her head in, "Oh, good. I was hoping you'd be here."
"I'm glad you're here," Kyle said, standing up, "We need to talk. About us. About Latnok."
"What about it, Kyle?" she asked him.
"If we're going to be together again…now that Cassidy is after me, and that he could have others, we need to figure something out."
"What do we need to figure out, Kyle?"
"We need to figure out if we can actually be together," he admitted, "If I can properly protect you. Cassidy already threatened everybody I love. You're one of the targets."
"Kyle, I don't believe that this Cassidy guy would go so far as to hunt me or your family down and…"
"Kill you," Kyle said, his voice husky, filled with emotion, with pain, "You don't know about this man. I do. Please trust me, Amanda. Cassidy would come and harm you and the Tragers. We need to work something out, before things go really bad."
"If you really insist, Kyle," she said, sitting down in one end of his tub, "I don't want to think about this, but if you think that I'm in danger, then let's figure something out."
"Thank you," Kyle said, sitting on the other side of the tub, "I really do want to find a proper way to protect you. I know I can protect the Tragers, but you're not always here. You're not always within my power to protect."
"Well then, let's figure something out," she said.
[Break]
["Little Victories" by Matt Nathanson; ends at the next set of brackets: .com/watch?v=JyzkWUNyfwQ]
Josh walked into the kitchen, where Stephen and Nicole were preparing dinner for the night. Stephen looked to him, "So, you did your chores. Did you call Andy yet?"
"Yeah, I did. I finally got a hold of her," he said with a smile spreading across his face, "She told me that she was busy with unpacking yet and getting used to living in a new town. She still can't talk often, but at least it's a start."
After he finished, he had a slight look of depression, "You really miss talking to her every day, don't you?" Nicole asked him.
"I do," he said, shaking his head, "I…I think I love her."
"Hey, at least you've reconnected in some form," Stephen said.
Nicole told him, "Just wait. You two will be together again. It may take a few years, but I'm sure you'll be together again."
"Thanks mom, dad," Josh told them, nodding and walking out.
"Do you really think they'll be back together?" Stephen asked Nicole.
She shrugged, "I don't see why not. I really think what she and Josh has is real. I'm certain they'll be back together one day."
[Break]
"All right!" Foss shouted up to Declan, "Good shots! Now, get down here and we'll be done for the day! You're doing well so far, Declan!"
As Declan began to climb down, he nodded to Foss, "Thanks. I…I've only ever really been good at basketball, but this…this chance to become Kyle's guardian, to be your successor and partner…I know this is right. I know that this is where I belong in my life, and in Kyle's."
"Your life and Kyle's are mixed, are they?" he questioned.
Declan nodded once, "I believe so. I really do think that we have some sort of connected life."
Foss nodded, "Well then, you can't let Kyle down. Be back here tomorrow at noon, and we'll continue."
Declan smiled and held out his hand, "Yeah, I'll be here on time."
Foss clasped his hand, "Good. Let's make sure, together, that Kyle is as protected as he can be."
"It'll be an honor to serve alongside you," Declan told Foss, to which Foss only nodded.
[Break]
Kyle and Amanda stood up, with a system in place. Kyle and Amanda would stay together as often as possible, but only when at their own homes. When out, Kyle would always be alert, and ready to run if need be. Kyle was certain that Latnok or Cassidy may make a move in plain sight like that, and she would need to hurry to be safe.
"It's not as simple as we once had it, but yeah. I'll accept it, just so I can be with you," Amanda told him, "I don't want to be shut up in my house, away from you, trying to have a relationship. Even if you're always watching everything, I'll gladly have that so we can be together. So we can make new memories, and hopefully, stay together this time."
When she was walking out, Kyle began to think about her words. About her statement of creating new memories.
Memories. Once more the concept comes to mind. Memories of the past may be something we wish to reclaim, to relive through thought or reality over and over again, but alas, it isn't always possible. My past with Amanda can only be in our memories. We have to set those good times aside and prepare to create more memories, but harder memories. Memories wrought in awareness, wariness, and danger.
As much as I want to be with Amanda, I can't introduce her to the danger that Cassidy presents. I can't put her into any sort of danger, but if I want a future with her, if we want to be together, we have to face this danger. Together.
But memories are a strong source. No matter what, they will always persist. So if nothing else, we still have our memories…
Foss was sitting, looking at the picture of his wife and daughter, lost in his memories of good times with them, of love.
Josh was playing G-Force, thinking about Andy, thinking about their time together, and his love for her, including his marriage proposal, and how things would have been different now if she had taken it seriously enough and had accepted.
And then there was Jessi, sitting, thinking about the limited times she had had with Kyle, when they had kissed, when they had been together. And to memories of seeing Kyle with Amanda, but those memories were filled with more loathing. She wanted Kyle, and didn't want to accept Amanda being with him. But if nothing else, she had her memories of her limited times with Kyle. Not that she was going to give up. That wasn't her way.
And then it came back to Kyle, thinking about his memories of times past with Amanda, and of his time with Adam Baylin.
Finally, the memory of Cassidy's words that he was Kyle's brother.
Memories may never leave us. Sometimes this is a good thing, but sometimes not. But we have to all move on. We have to put terrible memories behind us, while looking back on the good memories, and looking forward to crafting new memories that we will look forward to thinking about again in the future.
[Song ends]